The Power of Revelation: The Truth Shall Set You Free - YumiYuuuuki - 原神 (2024)

Chapter 1: Bow before the Abyss

Chapter Text

"Watch out!" Chongyun yelled, ducking as an Electro Orb sailed over his head.

Tartaglia was barely able to swerve out of the way in time to avoid the attack by the Electro Abyss Lector, while Zhongli hastily pulled up his Jade Shield before Kaeya got his face sliced off by the Hydro Abyss Herald.

"Thanks!" Kaeya chirped, barely phased, before shooting a bolt of Cryo right back at the Abyss Herald.

It all started when Aether had discovered a domain called the Spiral Abyss a while back, and had realised that it was filled with very tough, strong enemies that were extremely difficult to defeat. Even though it was located on Musk Reef, a place that was realistically only accessible by a portal above Cape Oath, it was still easily accessible to anyone who owned a glider, and the Traveller had decided it was in his best interest to warn his friends about the dangerous domain.

Obviously, some like Kaeya and Diluc were intrigued by such an odd domain, but they were cautious and wary enough that they wouldn't go exploring the Spiral Abyss for no reason without a proper party and supplies.

The main issue that occured was Tartaglia. Unlike most people who would balk at the mention of dangerous enemies, Tartaglia loved a good fight, and the second Aether mentioned the Spiral Abyss and the horrors that lay within, the Harbinger had practically begged the blonde for directions to the domain.

Aether really couldn't say no to Tartaglia, not when he was curious about the domain himself. After roping in the Cavalry Captain (Jean had only agreed because Aether and Kaeya had argued it could be a potential safety hazard, especially since the Abyss Order was being much more active), the zombie Qiqi (Baizhu wasn't too happy about putting her in danger but she wanted to help Aether), and the Kamisato Housekeeper (Thoma went behind Ayaka's back, thinking that it might contain threats to Inazuma and it could be good to gather some intel for Ayato), they had set off for the Spiral Abyss.

They fought their way through hoards of enemies, and it didn't take them long to realise that Aether was right: as they went through each floor, the enemies got progressively stronger and tougher to take down.

There was also the issue that they had to split up in order to cover two chambers, and they just didn't have enough people, being just barely to make it out alive, but the monsters and enemies seemed contained within the Spiral Abyss, and weren't able to escape, making the domain more of a challenge rather than a real threat to Teyvat.

And Tartaglia loved challenges, and fighting tough opponents. He especially liked it when they were put together.

Whenever he could get some spare time (which he had plenty of since his fallout with Zhongli), or he got frustrated and wanted to kill something, he just hopped on over to the Spiral Abyss (through Aether's Teapot Adepti Realm thingy) to vent his anger on the monsters.

Eventually, Kaeya caught wind of his actions and started accompanying him, saying that it was good training. It didn't take too long until others such as Diluc, that shorty Yaksha Xiao, and even the ever elusive Head of the Yashiro Commission, Kamisato Ayato (Tartaglia had no idea where the man had been when he had been investigating Scaramouche's whereabouts), to join in, and clearing the Abyss floors got gradually easier with more firepower and expereince.

They had managed to reach the twelfth floor of the Spiral Abyss, and Zhongli was busy worrying about Xiao, since they didn't know what enemies were on the Yaksha's half in the previous chamber, feeling that they had gotten off rather easily with two Ruin Guards and an Electro elemental node.

Weaving through columns of Pyro that erupted from the ground, narrowly dancing past bolts of Electro, evading Hydro blades that so closely resembled his own, Tartaglia couldn't stop the way his heart was pounding.

Tartaglia was having the time of his life against the Abyssal Trio, Childe was mildly worried as Zhongli rushed in to save Chongyun from the Pyro Lector's flames, and Ajax... well...

Ajax was terrified. Nightmares of that day he fell into nothingness, the darkness that seeped into his veins, his blood corrupted into that of the monsters' he had fought so desperately against, all in the desperate bid for survival, to go home and see his family once again.

The Pyro Lector activated its shield, catching Kaeya, who was duelling the Hydro Herald, off guard. Tartaglia fended off the Electro Lector, but could only watch helplessly as the Hydro Lector took the opportunity to slam Kaeya into the wall and stabbing him in the shoulder with watery blades, effectively incapacitating him.

Tossing the Knight aside carelessly, the Herald headed in Zhongli's direction, as Chongyun came to Tartaglia's aid and took over the duty of fending off the Electro Lector, freeing the Hydro user up to quickly and efficiently shred the Pyro Lector's shield and evening out their numbers.

Zhongli was holding his own against the Hydro Herald, until the Herald put his shield up. The air around the Herald was humid, full of water vapour and moisture from the abyssal Hydro attacks and shield, and the former Archon was finding it hard to catch his breath, being just barely in time to put up a new Jade Shield to intercept an attack.

Tartaglia knew that Zhongli was strong; the god had earned his place among the Seven. But the Abyssal energy radiating off the Herald was definitely not reacting well with Zhongli's divine nature, and the man was still recovering from his lack of a gnosis. Not to mention that Geo really wasn't the fastest at chipping away a Hydro shield. Put them all together and it was clear that Zhongli was barely keeping up.

The Hydro user would have loved to help the former Archon, even if they still hadn't made up, and maybe gloat in his face as some revenge for hiding the truth about his godhood (even if he did understand that as the God of Contracts, he couldn't really break a contract with the Cryo Archon), except for the fact that Tartaglia knew he would fare even worse than the retired God; his arrows weren't going to be piercing that Hydro Shield anytime soon, and using his Hydro blades would be even more useless.

Instead, the Harbinger leapt forward, redirecting a bolt of Electro away from Chongyun with a Hydro blade, "Go help Zhongli-xiansheng, I've got this."

The exorcist nodded, before running off and slamming his Spirit Blade right into the Hydro Herald's head and freezing the monster on the spot, the Chonghua Frost Field allowing Zhongli to aid the boy in shredding the Hydro shield.

Tartaglia smirked and unleashed his Hydro weaponry, and it didn't take him too long to hack away at the Electro Lector until it was forced to activate its shield.

"G̸r̵a̷c̷e̵ ̶b̶e̷ ̴u̷p̴o̷n̸ ̸y̸o̵u̷!̶"The Lector hissed, sending bolts of Electro at him, but Tartaglia was easily able to evade the bolts of lightning, before attempting to wear down the monster's shield. His Hydro blades weren't doing much, but it wasn't like he was going to fair any better against the Hydro Herald.

"H̴e̸a̸r̴ ̷y̶e̷,̵ ̵t̸h̷e̵ ̸w̴o̵r̸d̵s̷ ̴o̴f̵ ̷j̶o̴y̷!̸"

Tartaglia evaded the three Electro orbs elegantly, "I'm not feeling particularly joyful now, you know!"

For some reason, the Harbinger had a feeling that the Electro Lector wasn't too happy about his response. Despite not making any visible expressions, Tartaglia had a feeling that the Electro Lector was narrowing its eyes at him, looking into his very soul, judging him, seeing past his human exterior and at the wriggling mess of darkness and corruption that resided deep within him.

After all, they shared the same Abyssal origins, the Foul Legacy, regardless of the element they wielded.

And Tartaglia knew that the Lector was far more familiar with this power than he was.

"T̵h̶e̸ ̶w̴o̶r̶l̶d̴.̷.̷.̸ ̸w̶i̸l̷l̴ ̵b̷u̴r̵n̷.̷.̶.̸"

Out of the corner of his eye, Tartaglia noticed that Chongyun and Zhongli had finished the Hydro Abyss Herald off, and he knew that the Lector had noticed that too. The exorcist was making his way over to aid him against the Electro Lector while Zhongli was tending to Kaeya's bleeding wound.

"T̸h̶e̷ ̴p̴o̸w̵e̴r̸ ̸o̴f̴ ̶r̴e̷v̶e̷l̴a̸t̸i̷o̵n̸!̷"The Lector snarled,"A̵b̸y̸s̴s̵a̸l̸ ̷l̸i̸g̴h̸t̶,̶ ̶s̶h̷i̴n̶e̶!̴ T̵h̷e̶ ̴t̶r̵u̶t̸h̶ ̴s̷h̵a̷l̷l̵ ̴s̷e̴t̵ ̵y̸o̵u̵ ̸f̶r̸e̷e̸!̴ ̸"

Before the Harbinger could make a move, the Abyss Lector erupted into a shower of sparks, and Tartaglia's vision turned black.

Chapter 2: In the name of the Truth

Chapter Text

Jean blinked, and tried to take in her new surroundings.

Just a second ago she was filing up all the paperwork Kaeya had finished, but now, she was current in a room that contained many, admittedly, comfortable looking chairs, couches, and odd slime-looking cloth bags.

Or at least, she thought they were cloth bags, and gently poked one with her foot to make sure it wasn't a sentient being.

Before she could even begin to figure out just how she had ended up in this strange unknown location, Amber and Eula manifested out of nowhere, with the Outrider landing safely on a cloth bag while the Spindrift Knight managed to regain her bearings and land on her feet.

"Where..." Amber looked around in confusion, "Oh, Master Jean!"

"Whoever ended our lunch break so abruptly... that's just rude!" Eula protested at seemingly nothing, "Mark my words, vengeance will be mine!"

"Well... this is most unexpected..." Aether blinked, scratching the back of his head, "I thought we were heading towards Good Hunter."

"Yeah, we've finished our commissions and it's time for lunch!" Paimon nodded.

"It's lunch time?" Jean asked, and Amber nodded, "Yep! I was just sharing some intel with Eula, and we were considering grabbing a snack for you since you'd probably be holed up in your office, before you know... we kinda- EEEP!"

She was interrupted, when a male with crimson red hair appeared out of thin air, plunging his claymore into the ground.

The male blinked, confused, as he took in his surroundings.

"Master Diluc... were you fighting hilichurls again?" Jean asked.

"No... Abyss Mages, in fact. Just happened to be walking by and saw them congregating under a cliff. So I decided to ambush them... and somehow ended up... here..." Diluc effortlessly yanked his claymore out of the ground, only to make an odd noise in confusion when the crack in the floor disappeared magically, like someone hadn't just plunged a greatsword into it.

"Ah... you are all from Mondstat, aren't you?" A new voice rang out.

The four Knights turned, only to realize that they weren't alone, and the red-head instantly raised his claymore once again. In another corner of the room, there stood a lady wearing a white sleevelessqipao, ayoung woman with pale blue hair andwere those horns?, another purple haired lady who had her hair done in buns that resembled cat ears, and a lady with an eyepatch.

"Yes... we hail from Mondstat." Jean greeted politely, "If my memory serves me right... I suppose you are all part of the Liyue Qixing?"

"That is correct, I am Ningguang, Tianquan of the Liyue Qixing. These two are Ganyu, secretary at Yuehai Pavilion, and this is the Yuheng of the Liyue Qixing, Keqing. And that is Captain Beidou of the Crux Fleet." Ningguang introduced, "It appears that we are all caught in this odd predicament, and I would like to propose that we work together to find a way out of here."

Jean was about to accept Ningguang's offer when another group of people appeared out of nowhere. A blue-haired duo, most likely siblings, if their similarities said anything, landed elegantly on the floor, but the third member, a blonde, wasn't so lucky, and landed on the ground.

"Oww!" The green eyed man groaned, using his broom to push himself to his feet, "I was just sweeping the courtyard! If someone's going to yank me away from my duties, at least let me finish that section first!"

The blue haired man chuckled, "I do not think that should be your priority at the moment, Thoma, but I appreciate the dedication."

The younger girl patted her dress, before taking in her surroundings. Her eyes landed on Diluc, and she tilted her head, trying to wrack her brain, "You... feel familiar..."

That got the blonde's attention, and Thoma's eyes widened in realization, "Lady Ayaka, this be theMaster Dilucthat Aether mentioned during our hotpot game? And I believe the rest of the Knights of Favonius, though I have no idea where Sir Kaeya is? I think he also talked about the Liyue Qixing before... you know..."

"Ah, so you also know the Traveller." Ningguang let out a small laugh, "Well, I guess this makes things easier. I apologize, from your garb I'd assume you're from Inazuma, but with the recent Sakoku Decree, I'm afraid I'm not too familiar with who you might be."

"No worries there." The blue-haired man nodded, but before he could continue, more figures appeared out of thin air.

"Barbara! Noelle!" Jean exclaimed, noticing her younger sister, and Diluc caught her before she hit the ground, while the maid was helped by Eula. A man with light brown hair elegantly twisted mid-air, landing firmly on his feet. He twirled his paintbrush as he tried to figure out what was going on, before he sighed, "I didn't get to finish my painting..."

"Jean!" Barbara smiled, as the Winery owner placed her down gently, "What's going on!? I was singing... and then..."

"Light novels are supposed to be fiction!" A shorter boy with dark blue hair exclaimed, having landed on the floor by Ningguang's feet.

"It could though!" Another girl with blossom-shaped pupils grinned, "That would be super cool! And more clients for the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor! Say, you wouldn't happen to know where Zhongli is, would you, Xingqiu? I heard he went off with somewhere Chongyun!"

"Sorry Hutao, I haven't met with Chongyun for a while, and for the last time, Isekai doesn't exist!"

"Oh my, and my writers put so much effort into those works! You mean to tell me it's not realistic enough while still being in the realm of fantasy?" A pink haired lady with fox ears shook her head, "I'm wounded, I truly am!"

"Miko, now is not the time for this." Another lady with a long purple hair sighed, "What kind of power is at play here? I should be in Tenshukaku, not... wherever here is..."

"Yaho!" A cheery voice rang out, and a bard created an Anemo current to float down to safety, "Oh, so many people here! It's always great to make new friends!"

"Take this seriously, Venti." Diluc chided, and the Anemo user rolled his eyes, "Relax, Master Diluc. There's no point in stressing if the perpetrator isn't here anyways! Anyways, Inazuma's Sakoku Decree has been abolished, so what better time than now to make some connections with the Heads of the Yashiro Commission, the Guuji of the Grand Narukami Shrine, and the Electro Archon herself?"

"Oh? Look, Ei, this little bard knows who we are!" Yae snickered, knowing fully well who Venti was but found it amusing to play along.

"What is the meaning of this, Bar-" Ei was silenced by a look in Yae's eyes, and Venti quickly covered up Ei's slip up, "Yep! Master Diluc is the bartender and owner of Angel's Share!"

Diluc let out an audible groan of annoyance.

"Your Excellency, are you sure..."

"Gorou, I'm sure that after the abolition of the Vision Hunt Decree and the Sakoku Decree, the Raiden Shogun shouldn't have any ill intentions towards us. After all, there is no longer a reason for war at the moment, am I right, Kujou Sara?"

"That is correct. The arrest warrants have all been repealed, yours too, Kaedehara Kazuha." Sara replied, turning her attention to a man with platinum hair with a red streak running through it, "Though even if they weren't repealed, I feel that in this odd scenario, we can set aside our differences for the time being."

"Kazuha! Hey!" Beidou waved at the wandering samurai. Kazuha waved back, before turning his attention back to Sara.

"I am inclined to agree with you, Madam Kujou." Kazuha nodded, "Though I believe that whoever has brought us here isn't exactly malicious. Why then, would they bring so many others? After all, the fate that brings people together is not a cord so easily cut."

"That is a mystery." Ningguang agreed, "But I do not think that is important at the moment. I propose splitting up, and searching this entire room to see if there is a way out, before deciding on our next course of action."

With so many people searching around, it didn't take them too long to realize that there wasn't really an exit, and they were stuck thinking of another plan. Most of them had settled down, either on the couch, on the chairs, or on the beanbags (Amber had mentioned that they felt like bags filled with beans).

Two more beings appeared out of the blue, but the green haired boy instantly teleported himself to the ground, catching a small girl before she could hit the ground.

"Are you alright, Qiqi?" The boy asked, gently placing the zombie on the ground.

"Qiqi is fine. But the others..."

Right on cue, three more figures spawned into the room, but directly on the ground.

"Kaeya!" Jean yelped, noticing the bloody stab wound in the Calvary Captian's shoulder, and Barbara and Qiqi immediately rushed over to heal his wound.

"Aiya! Zhongli, there you are! Where were you all day? I know you took the day off, but... You look worse for wear!" Hutao looked at Zhongli's slightly ruffled clothes.

"We would be worse off if it weren't for Zhongli's shields..." A boy with light blue hair groaned, before fishing around his pockets for a popsicle.

"Where were you!?" Diluc demanded, glaring at Kaeya, and everyone couldn't really tell if Diluc was upset at Kaeya himself, or the fact that the man was injured.

"We were at the Spiral Abyss." Zhongli answered in Kaeya's stead, "Apologies, I should have been more careful to ensure that Sir Kaeya didn't get such an injury, but I'm afraid I was caught off-guard."

"The Spiral Abyss? The one place I only wanted to explore just to make sure it wasn't a threat to any of the nations." Aether deadpanned, "The one place I told you guys not to visit."

"Heh, don't worry about it. We were all surprised. Plus, it's good practise." Kaeya grinned, having been patched up by the two healers, "I'm pretty sure I got the worst of the injuries. And it wasn't even that bad."

"Sir Kaeya, you forget that Childe was slammed halfway across the room by the Ruin Guards in the previous chamber." Zhongli chided, "Speaking of which... have any of you seen Childe? Last I recall, he was fending off a Abyss Lector that wielded the power of Electro-"

"An Abyss Lector!?" The green haired boy nearly screeched, "We only had to deal with some whopperflowers!"

"Well, not just one of them, there was a Hydro Abyss Herald and two Abyss Lectors appeared, one of which was Pyro and the other Electro-"

"THREE OF THEM!?"

Ganyu was sure that if Xiao wasn't an adepti, he'd probably be having an aneurysm right about now.

"Back to my original question, does anyone know where Childe is? If everyone who was in the Spiral Abyss was teleported here, it stands to reason that he should have been teleported along with us."

"I still do not understand why you still care for that Fatui scum after what he did." Xiao deadpanned.

"I don't know who you are, but I agree." Diluc nodded.

Yae and Ei both glanced at Zhongli in confusion, while Aether shook his head, "You guys, you know Childe really isn't that bad..."

Speaking of which, another figure materialized, and he immediately dropped to a crouch, Hydro weaponry in his hands, "Oh come on! Don't you have anything else to say beside screeching"The power of revelation!"in my face like ten times!?"

The man was about to swing his blades before he noticed the enemy he was fighting was no longer there, and he looked around in confusion.

"You guys haven't happened to see an Abyss Lector here or something, have you?"

Diluc and Xiao immediately raised their weapons, and the three members of the Liyue Qixing straight up glared at the Harbinger, but Thoma lit up and waved, "Hey! Childe! I don't think we saw this "Lector" or whatever you were fighting, though."

Ayato turned to Thoma in confusion, "You know this Fatui?"

"Ah, yes, my lord, let me explain." Thoma started, "After the Vision Hunt Decree was abolished, an odd domain had popped up in Araumi, and Childe was doing some investigations regarding another Harbinger. Lady Ayaka and I hosted him at the Komore Teahouse a few times to exchange non-sensitive intel. He also taught me some extra tricks with the polearm!"

"I see." Ayato nodded, and Tartaglia released his hold on his Hydro blades, "Well, if there are no enemies to fight, I'm out of here."

"Sadly, Master Childe, we've searched the room. No exits. Guess we're stuck here. But hey, since we don't know if we'll ever get out, is anyone interested in-"

"Director Hu, I do not think this is an appropriate time for your "advertisem*nts"." Zhongli chided, "However, if there are no exits, I'm afraid that I am also out of ideas for how to get out. I do not think it would be an appropriate course of action to break out of this room, as we do not know what lays outside."

"I agree with Mo-" Venti chuckled as Zhongli glared at him, "Zhongli, my bad. This is perilous, the situation suspicious, with a lack of insight, we must sit tight!"

"This isn't the time for your poems either, bard." Diluc grumbled, as Aether made his way over to Tartaglia to check on him.

"It's my job!"

"Qiqi, would you mind healing Childe?" Aether sighed, "He probably doesn't need it, and he's too stubborn to ask for help himself, but if we're all going to be stuck here for an undetermined amount of time, I'd rather everyone be in top shape."

The zombie nodded, and made her way over to the Harbinger's side, despite the protests from Diluc and Xiao.

Tartaglia grumbled under his breath, Childe patted Qiqi gently on the head while Ajax relished the sensation of his pain washing away.

"While they're doing that, I suggest we all introduce ourselves again, just so everyone knows who's who."

After a quick round of introductions, all of a sudden, a strange crystalline object appeared in the middle of the room, right next to Paimon, and the fairy shrieked in surprise.

"What is that?" Chongyun asked in confusion, as Albedo walked over to have a closer look. He poked the device cautiously with his paintbrush, frowning as he got no reaction.

"Looks like my Lumenstone Adjuvant... except I don't think I can light it up." Aether muttered, prodding the device as if it were the artifact he was familiar with, hoping for something to happen.

"Maybe it's a switch of some kind?" Venti suggested, grinning from ear to ear, "Maybe we should all try to activate it. Hey, Tarty, go touch it. Since that thing appeared next to you and you're the last to arrive."

"Don't call me "Tarty". And don't be ridiculous, there's no way that-" Tartaglia poked the odd device, and all the lights in the room immediately shut off.

"Look what you've done!" Xiao hissed, and Aether had to physically restrained him before he skewered the Harbinger, "It wasn't his fault. And at least something happened, instead of us being stuck in a room with no idea how to get out!"

"I do not think we are going to be attacked. On the contrary, I have the feeling that something is waiting for us to do something. Perhaps you should all sit down." Kazuha suggested.

"Okay, don't mind if I do." Kaeya snickered, slipping onto the couch next to where Diluc was standing with his weapon still gripped firmly in his hand. The redhead rolled his eyes, but put his claymore away regardless and sat down next to his brother. Most of the others had already picked their seats before their arrival, and Aether yanked Xiao away to another couch, trying to minimize the chances of the Yaksha picking a fight with the Harbinger.

Hutao had ran off to bother Chongyun and Xingqiu, and the only available spot was a spot next to the retired Geo Archon; Zhongli had already sat himself down elegantly in a beanbag that was large enough for two. Sighing in exasperation, Tartaglia plopped down next to Zhongli.

Noticing that Qiqi also didn't have a place to sit, Tartaglia gently guided the zombie to sit down between himself and Zhongli.

The second Qiqi settled down, the weird device erupted into light, filling the room and projecting something for everyone to see.

Chapter 3: Frozen descent

Chapter Text

Tartaglia's eyes were immediately drawn to the familiar snowy mountain caps, the snowy peaks of his homeland reaching up towards the sky as if the resident Archon wanted to pick a fight with the rulers of the sky.

Which wasn't wrong, considering why the Tsaritsa was collecting the Gnoses from her fellow Archons.

"So much snow. And it's definitely not Dragonspine." Albedo commented, "That must be Snezhnaya then."

"Qiqi likes cold. But this is too cold." Tartaglia heard the zombie mutter.

Snow and ice swirled all over, the telltale signs of winter storms rampaging through the region.

Lakes closer to sea level were frozen over, the shimmering gleam of ice reflecting and refracting sunlight, a sharp contrast to the greys and whites of the mountain peaks, and the shores of Snezhnaya were dotted by various seaside villages.

"Hmmm... I haven't been to Snezhnaya in years!" Venti grinned, as the scene zoomed in, "But if I'm not wrong, that should be Morepesok!"

They could see a small boy, maybe about ten years old, casting a fishing rod into a hole cut into the ice, with a taller man beside him, placing some bait onto the hook of another fishing rod.

The boy jiggled the rod slightly, but the man stopped him, "Don't be impatient, Ajax. You'll scare the fish away."

"But Papa, I'm bored." Ajax whined.

"How about I tell you the story of your namesake?"

"I've already heard that story many times before." The boy huffed, though it was obvious to everyone that the boy wouldn't mind hearing the story again.

And so the boy's father started, talking about a child who inheritted powers of the gods, an adventurer who explored the deepest reaches of the world while slaying dangerous monsters he met on the road. A man who was praised by all for his strength and bravery, being one of the few heroes who aided in his nation's victory in battle.

Ajax was listening so intently that he didn't notice the slight movement of his fishing rod, and his father pointed it out to him before continuing his tale.

"If I recall correctly, isn't the tale of Ajax a tragic one?" Ei asked, "I was under the impression the man killed himself out of remorse for his misdeeds after being tricked."

"Hush now." Yae's ears flicked about, clearly interested in what was being shown (or rather, how she could write another light novel), "And that isn't appropriate to tell a child."

"I don't think any of us knows an Ajax." Ningguang narrowed her eyes, looking at Tartaglia suspiciously.

Luckily, Zhongli came to his rescue before Tartaglia could spout whatever nonsense he could think of and make a fool out of himself, "Well, this clearly takes place in Sneznaya. Perhaps Childe's connection to his homeland was what triggered the device to work."

Ajax and his father continued fishing, slowly moving along the frozen lake. The small boy watched as his father took his knife out to carve out another hole in the ice, before the man turned to the boy.

"Do you want to give it a try? I'll guide you."

Ajax shook his head vehemently, looking warily at the knife.

"Alright then. Maybe when you're older." His father sighed, putting the blade away, "Come on, grab the fishing rods, I can see some fish here."

After catching a whole bucket of fish, the man straightened up, and grinned, "Alright, I think we've got enough. Let's go home, okay?"

Ajax nodded eagerly, "Mama said I can help her with cooking too!"

A wolf's howl rang out in the distance, and Ajax immediately froze, his cerulean orbs filled with childlike innocence darting around wildly.

"What... was that..."

"A wolf. It's getting late. We better head home soon before the sun sets." His father informed him.

"That's so adorable." Amber cooed.

The scene changed.

They watched as the boy helped his mother cook, watched as he tucked his little sister into bed, watched as he refused to get out of bed in the morning because it was too cold and he was nice and warm under the blankets.

They watched as Ajax taught his younger sister how to read, showed her how to hold her pen properly when she tried to write in Snezhnaya's native script, cleaning the floor swiftly when she knocked over her drink in excitement when she finally got a word right.

It was cute and heartwarming... but it didn't make any sense.

They watched as the boy went fishing with his father, how he shuddered when wolved howled in the distance, how he screeched and hid when a stray bear attacked, leaving his father and other adults to deal with the situation.

All throughout everything, the older, more mature and wary ones kept shooting cautious gazes at Tartaglia.

It was clear that this "Ajax" was connected to him in some way, shape or form. They both hailed from Snezhnaya, they both sported fluffy chestnut hair, and eyes of the same shade as Noctilucous Jade.

But that's where the similarities ended.

Ajax was a cheerful young boy, who's only concern was ice fishing and taking care of his family.

Diluc casted another suspicious glance at Tartaglia.

Tartaglia was a dangerous, bloodthirsty Fatui Harbinger who's only goal was to serve the Tsaritsa and pick a fight with every single dangerous entity he laid his eyes on. There was a reason his name was highly feared, even amongst the ranks of the Fatui soldiers under him; on the battlefield, at the mere age of fourteen, the boy had supposedly one of the highest kill counts, surpassing even those of men who were almost twice his age.

The Darknight hero had to admit, he had heard of the name Tartaglia before he returned to Mondstat, and needless to say, hearing that the newest Fatui Harbinger was a boy who was younger than him shook him to the core.

Diluc hated the Fatui with every fiber of his being, but he wasn't stupid; he didn't stand a chance against most of the Harbingers, which consisted of many powerful immortal beings like Signora, who had eons of of experience and probably could find countless ways to crush him before he could even lay a finger on them.

Except maybe that ruthless psychopath Dottore; Diluc could snap him like a twig, but that man was dangerous not for his fighting abilities, but rather, the insane and absurd ideas that deranged brain of his churned out and the twisted experiments he loved running.

He had no intention of destroying their diplomatic relations and consequently turning the wrath of the Tsaritsa and the strongest military forces in all of Teyvat against Mondstat, otherwise, he would have killed off that madman long ago, even if he had killed the monster that had taken his father's life.

But for a mere mortal to have climbed his way from the lowest ranks all the way to the top of a military detachment led by an Archon, becoming one of her lieutenants, was no small feat indeed. Tartaglia may not be able to wield the level of power held by his fellow Harbingers, but the fact still stood that he was strong enough to catch the Tsaritsa's attention, and that he could possible grow even stronger with more experience and knowledge.

She believed him to be strong enough for her goals despite his youth, and that alone was enough for Diluc to be wary of the man, even if Aether, Zhongli and even Kaeya were adamant about vouching for him.

Diluc knew that Kaeya hung around the man a lot, and they were even on considerably friendly terms, especially with his tendency to go off and "train" in the Spiral Abyss, and the only reason the redhead was okay with that was because he trusted Kaeya not to do anything remotely stupid and reckless, and he'd rather the Fatui Harbinger die in there rather than his brother, even if they were somewhat estranged.

Zhongli had the barest hint of a frown on his usually composed face. He had a feeling that this "Ajax" that they were watching was Tartaglia, and he couldn't help but feel that this was an invasion of his privacy. Sure, the Harbinger had tried to drown his city, but he had only been doing it out of loyalty for his Archon. If he hadn't made the contract with Signora and the Tsaritsa, he was sure Tartaglia would leave Liyue alone... though that would have resulted in him being unable to meet the boy in the first place.

The former Archon didn't mind the fact that Tartaglia was a Harbinger. On the contrary, he was glad that his companion was able to take care of himself, and while he would occasionally get upset that Tartaglia would come back covered in blood (that usually wasn't his own, at least, mostly), he didn't have to worry about Tartaglia being slain in battle; as long as the Harbinger stayed in Liyue, Zhongli was confident that he would be able to beat them.

Well... as long as he didn't tangle with Ganyu or Xiao.

What bothered Zhongli the most was the absolute lack of light in his eyes, like his essence had been sucked out of his body. His eyes were duller than Qiqi's, and the girl was a literaljiangshi.

Instead of gleaming with life, the boy's eyes shone with bloodlust and the absolute need to decimate his enemies, the need to prove that he was stronger and would come out on top, no matter the circ*mstances.

It was as if the Abyss itself had sucked the life right out of him.

But that wasn't possible, right? Mikoshi Chiyo was one of the strongest Youkai of her time, and even her very essence was corrupted by the devouring depths. Mere mortals couldn't possibly withstand the sheer power of the Abyss, the void of endless darkness that taints and eats away at the body and soul until there was nothing left to salvage.

Zhongli was startled out of his thoughts when he heard "Ajax" speak up again.

"Mama!"

The boy, having gotten distracted by a shiny rock and separated from his mother and sister,looked around warily, all the while being pushed around by passers-by in the crowded streets of a marketplace. He was wearing a brown and white bomber hat and a thick coat.

He looked slightly older, but the sheer expression of fear etched into his face made him look so much younger, as the boy's gleaming blue orbs flicked around wildly.

"Mama?" Ajax pulled his coat tighter around himself, and was nearly knocked to the ground when someone carelessly bumped into him, " сестра?"

"Why isn't anyone helping him?" Xingqiu huffed, "He's a child. Any self-respecting person should be helping a lost kid find his parent, whether they know him or not!"

"Is there a church or some central point in Snezhnaya where he can go find some help?" Barbara asked worriedly.

"Not really." Venti admitted, "There are a lot of mountains and places with untraversable terrains, so a lot of the villages are kept rather separated and have their own communities. Though I believe that trade exists between these villages because each of them have their own specialties."

"Must be a festival of some kind. But the only Snezhnayan one I can remember off the top of my head is Krsnik Noc." Yae admitted, "But since the days are usually short with long nights, I suspect most people are more concerned about finishing up their businesses and returning home before the sun sets."

Upon seeing the confused looks of the younger Vision Bearers, Zhongli explained, "It is very dangerous at night; temperatures drop drastically, and without the sun or any other forms of light, it is hard to make out anything, especially with frequent snowstorms obstructing one's view. If one were to attempt to brave the ravaging storms, not only are they likely to get lost, they cannot differentiate between what is a proper route and what might be loose clumps of snow, though I feel this is more of a problem for visitors rather than natives. However, it is still extremely taxing on the body, and if anyone were to be stuck outside without a proper abode to rest in, its likely that they could pass out from exhaustion, and no one would find them until the next morning."

He glared at Hutao, as if daring her to make some sort of morbid joke that consisted of promoting their funeral parlor business to the Snezhnayans.

The girl snickered, but ultimately kept her mouth shut.

Despite wielding a Cryo vision, Chongyun shuddered, "That is... scary..."

"Anyways, I don't think it's just that." Beidou interjected, "I believe that most fishing villages do have some shortage of funds, most of it being hoarded by the Fatui for military purposes. I mean, the Fatui do make up a huge part of Snezhnaya's economy, right?"

"I believe fire-water is a common drink in Snezhnaya, and alcohol... well... we all know what alcohol does to people." Diluc glared at Kaeya, who shrugged nonchalantly.

"Considering that the Fatui are, admittedly, the more cunning and manipulative type, perhaps they also want to appear tougher so as to avoid potential back-stabbings as it would be more trouble than it's worth. It's easier to take people out when you don't know them, after all, and a lot of them have their families to protect and feed." Kaeya smirked, "No offence there, Childe. But I think I've heard you complain enough about Signora."

"None taken." Tartaglia groaned, "It's mostly the higher-ups in the Fatui that do all the "secret operation" sh*t that I hate behind the scenes, but I can see how others can pick up on those traits in self-defense."

Xiao rolled his eyes, but opted to remain quiet.

Everyone could only watch helplessly as Ajax was shoved around bypassers-by as he tried to make his way to the side of the marketplace, to an alleyway where he could at least catch his breath and avoid making anyone angry.

The boy was on the verge of tears as he continued to call out for his mother and sister. The sky was gradually getting darker, and the boy sank to the ground, wrapping his arms around himself protectively as tears started to roll down his cheeks.

"Ajax?"

The boy perked up at his name, and he paused, waiting to check if it was his imagination or someone was really calling for him.

"Ajax! Where are you?"

The child immediately shot to his feet, and rushed to the entrance of the alleyway, " сестра!"

"Stay where you are!" His older sister shouted back, "I'll come find you!"

Luckily, it didn't take too long for an older girl with the same shade of hair and gleaming blue eyes to pop out from behind the corner, and she immediately trapped Ajax in a hug, "We were so worried about you, Ajax! Where have you been? Mama has been rushing to get everything for dinner, and we expected you to stick with us..."

At this point, the poor boy just burst into tears and wrapped his arms around her neck, "сестра ! I was so scared! You were all gone and I called for help and..."

Ajax sniffled, and his older sister immediately wiped his tears away, "At least I've found you... come on, let's go home, and I'll draw you a nice warm bath, okay? And please stop crying, you'll get f rostbite around your eyes."

"Thank goodness his sister found him." Noelle heaved a sigh of relief, before another scene started up.

Chapter 4: The door is opened unto you

Chapter Text

Ajax was holding a shortsword in his hand, a slightly older man standing behind him as the boy whacked a training dummy with the flat of his blade.

"Hold it more upright." The man corrected, correcting his form, "You want to be an adventurer, right? You need to know how to fight properly."

The boy let out a small groan, before lifting his sword again and swinging it at thedummy.

"No," The man took the sword from Ajax, "Like this!"

With a quick slash, the man expertly sliced the head of the training dummy off.

Ajax's eyes widened, and he took a step back in shock, "But... I don't... брат, you killed him!"

"I'm going to admit, the first time I saw something like that, I was probably traumatized for life." Kaeya joked, "Especially since I wasn't expecting it."

Diluc rolled his eyes, but remained quiet, seeing through Kaeya's facade.

He remembered the day he had Kaeya had been enrolled in the Knights of Favonius training program, and their instructor was teaching them how to kill hilichurls, using a dummy as an example. Kaeya had been silent throughout the entire training session, but the second they got back to their temporary room (Dawn Winery was too far for them to go back to every single day) the blue haired boy had broke down in tears and cried while Diluc tried his best to comfort him.

(Aether had recently told him about the Chasm while they were sharing intel in the Serenitea Pot, and that he and Paimon had learnt that hilichurls were actually cursed humans from Khaenri'ah. With the added context that Kaeya was also from the same place that had been destroyed all those years ago, it suddenly made sense why the boy would freak out.)

Diluc suddenly felt really bad about making fun of Kaeya all those years ago, back when they were still young and naive and the worst tragedy in the world being Diluc's spilt grape juice.

"It's a training dummy! It wasn't alive in the first place!" Ajax's older brother replied, confused, almost like he didn't understand why Ajax was kicking up such a big fuss.

Ajax gestured at the dummy, "I don't want to kill anyone!"

"You know adventurers are going to run into all kinds of stuff out in the wilderness." The man replied, "Not just Treasure Hoarders, but also monsters like slimes and hilichurls. Or even Ruin Guards; who knows when one of those things are going to spring to life and try killing everything in its path."

"Then I'll just run! It's not like I can take a Ruin Guard down with asword,брат!" Ajax retorted.

His older brother laughed, "HA! Good point, but still, that doesn't change the fact that you're going to have to protect yourself. I'm sure you'll be good enough that Treasure Hoarders might back down from a fight, but wild animals and monsters aren't going to stop until you're dead."

Slipping the sword back into the Ajax's hand, the man smiled, "Or maybe you'd prefer a different weapon? I'm sure we have a bow or a greatsword somewhere..."

"I'll stick with the sword!" Ajax blanched, "I can't even lift a claymore!"

"He's adorable!" Amber squealed, "I really hope he becomes an adventurer! You think we'd run into him one day? Maybe Ajax would come and explore Mondstadt!"

Ganyu winced, "Isn't he a bit... young to start training? And killing?"

"It is better to start young, as long as he isn't forced to do something he doesn't want to." Eula huffed.

"As for teaching him about foes that may try to kill him. Better that he learns about the danger in a safe environment, rather that growing up and thinking that everything is friendly." Aether glared at Tartaglia.

The"Such as telling your younger brother that Ruin Guards were toys called Mr Cyclops instead of killing machines"went unsaid.

"Oh, come on, comrade!" Tartaglia scratched his head sheepishly, "He's far too young to learn about that! He'll learn about the dangers of Ruin Guards later, when he's ready! Until then, I continue to protect him and his dreams."

Everyone glanced between the Fatui Harbinger and the Traveller; this was clearly something that only they were privy to.

"Oh! More tea!" Venti shushed them all, as another event started playing out.

The boy looked around fourteen years old, and he pulled out a small bag before checking its contents.

"Some mora... a few loafs of bread... a bit of water..." Ajax nodded to himself. He glanced around his room, making sure that his younger sister was fast asleep, before gently tiptoeing to the living room.

Closing the door silently behind him, Ajax crept to the front door, snatching up his oversized winter coats and bomber hat, before cautiously slipping outside, ensuring that the door didn't slam behind him and wake the rest of the household up.

"I'm not old enough?" Ajax grumbled to himself, "If I don't start now, I'll never learn anything."

Taking out the sheathed shortsword from his bag and hooking it on his belt, Ajax slung his small bag of supplies onto his soldier, before he headed towards the woods just at the back of his home.

"Uh... does he have a death wish or something?" Keqing asked, and Sara frowned, "A child shouldn't be able to sneak out so easily."

"Hey, Childe, is it normal for kids to... you know... book it from their homes with barely any supplies?" Thoma turned to the Harbinger, "He can't even make a fire to warm himself up! He'll freeze! And there's not nearly enough food and water!"

"Not everyone is a portable kitchen with all the know-how like you, Thoma!" Tartaglia laughed, but it was clear from his expression that he didn't find the joke funny, and he clenched his jaw shut. His entire body was tense, and it was something that didn't go unnoticed by Zhongli. He would do anything in his power to help Tartaglia, but any action he took would most likely bring more attention to the Harbinger, and Zhongli didn't want to make him more uncomfortable than he already was.

He shot a pleading look towards Venti, and the wind spirit smirked.

"You owe me, old man!"Venti stuck his tongue out as he telegraphed a mental message to Zhongli, before the bard clapped his hands cheerfully, "Well, if we want to see how the story unfolds, we should keep on watching, no?"

"You do have a point." Jean sighed, "We can all question Master... Tartaglia...?"

"Ah, you can all call me Childe." Tartaglia shrugged, grateful for the interruption, "Since we're all going to be stuck here for a while, I think we can forgo the honorifics."

"Alright." Jean nodded.

The boy continued walking, pulling his coat tighter around himself in a vain attempt to keep warm. It was obvious he had no destination in mind, or any idea where he was going, except that he wanted to get as far away from his home as possible.

Wolves howled in the night, with the only source of illumination being the moon in the clear night sky, peering through the cracks between the bare branches of trees, where everyone's constellations were hung for all to see.

After a few hours of walking, needless to say, Ajax was completely and utterly lost. Besides the idle crunching of snow beneath the boy's feet and birds screeching in the distance, no other sounds could be heard .

"I... maybe... I should go back..." The boy timidly muttered, tightening his grip on his outer coat, "I can follow my footprints back..."

"I... don't think that's a good idea..." Gorou's voice trailed off, as his tailed flicked about nervously.

The boy turned around, and started tracing his footsteps, before he paused.

"Uh oh..." Xingqiu gulped.

Right in front of the boy stood a pack of wolves, having tracked him from the very set of footprints the boy had left behind and was now following. Their eyes gleamed predatorily as they emerged from the shadows, t heir coats gleamed silver in the moonlight, growling hungrily at the prospect of having a human child for supper.

"No, run!" Ayaka called out, though it was obvious that this was just a memory, and that everything that they were seeing was already set in stone.

"He can't outrun them. There's too many..." Barbara looked like she was about to faint from worry, "Maybe he'll get lucky?"

Ajax froze, his entire body tensing up, before he let out a terrified screech. He immediately turned around and raced deeper into the woods, weaving left and right past trees, getting even more lost as he tried to shake off his pursuers.

The wolves refused to give up, chasing after the boy. One of them pounced on Ajax, sending him crashing into the snow, but Ajax hastily unsheathed his sword and slashed it across the wolf's face. The canine howled, pausing in its assault, giving the young boy another chance to escape.

However, his coat was severely hindering his movements, and it wasn't long before another member of the pack tackled the boy to the ground, knocking his bag and the shortsword out of his grasp.

"Get off me!" With no weapon in hand, Ajax grabbed his bag and attempted to whack it in the wolf's face, though that seemed to do nothing but annoy the wolf further, but it did buy him some time to scramble onto a very conveniently placed boulder.

The wolf growled, before another roar pierced the air. Ajax turned around cautiously, only to find a bear growling at the wolves, having accidentally wandered into its personal space while it was looking for food.

"Get out of there unless you want to become my client!" Hutao threatened.

The bear growled menacingly, but the wolves refused to backdown. Ajax's eyes flicked between them, tightening his grip around his bag of meagre supplies.

Supplies that would mean nothing if he died now.

He eyed his shortsword, which had fallen only a few inches away. If only he could get his hands on it...

He waited.

Ajax knew that he wouldn't be able to outrun any of the wild predators. His coatwas weighing him down, and he didn't have the stamina to outlast them anyways.

He was out of options, but he could give it a try. The wolves and the vear could easily reach the rock he was standing on, and he was surrounded on both sides.

Ajax couldn't afford to wait until one side backed down.

He needed to get away, and maybe find a sturdy tree, though, something that could hold his weight properly, and wasn't already dry and brittle from the sheer cold and would shatter like glass from the slightest bit of pressure. Hopefully, that would be enough to make the animals think he was more trouble than it was worth, and go find some other prey instead.

Then he could go home, tuck himself back into bed, and never run away again.

He waited.

Could bears climb trees? Ajax didn't know, but hopefully the answer was no.

He could hear the bear getting closer. The wolves were hesitating, clearly not wanting to get into a scuffle, but also being unwilling to let go of their prey.

He waited, until the bear was close enough, and the wolves took a step back, still glaring at the larger animal warily.

Ajax leapt off the boulder, snatching up his shortsword from the snow. His hands were freezing, and he clenched them tighter around the leather hilt of his sword, before scampering away.

Out of the corner of his eye, he could see the wolves chasing after him, but his heart was pounding, the blood roaring in his ears, drowning out all the other sounds.

He eyed several trees that could suit his needs; he couldn't see the details clearly in the dark, but he's had enough experience climbing trees, entertaining himself when his father didn't bring him ice fishing or his mother was too busy to teach him how to cook.

He'd liked to think that he's rather skillful in the art of tree climbing.

Ajax's foot punctured through the thick layer of snow, fully expecting to make firm contact with the ground.

Instead, for a brief, fleeting moment like the existence a snowflake, he felt weightless.

The boy froze, but it was already too late.

"NO!" Venti gasped. Zhongli and Ei remained quiet, but it was clear they understood what was going on.

Yae blinked at the scene, mildly agitated, before she turned to Tartaglia, and everything clicked into place.

No wonder she felt something wrong about the boy when he just dropped into the room randomly; she had assumed it was some vestiges of the random Abyss Lector the Harbinger had been demanding a fight for some reason, or from the so-called Spiral Abyss in general.

She hadn't been expectingthis.

He hazarded a look downwards, only to be met with a gaping hole of utterly nothing. The earth had cracked open, as if the Archon of Geo had personally come to swallow him whole with a sharp, gaping maw. It was almost as if the darkness had reached out of the void, gently tugging him forward, yanking him directly into the soulless arms of the Abyss.

And Ajax couldn't do anything but watch as gravity took its hold.

He fell, as the cold of perpetual winter storms that Snezhnaya was famous for was replaced by an even deeper, more ancient chill that raced down his spine, rushing throughout his entire body in ways that the cold could never achieve, as if some primal instinct had awakened within him, urging him to escape.

The boy looked up.

Despite being nighttime, compared to the absolute darkness all around him, the hole in the surface shimmered like a star, his last shard of hope.

He wanted to go home.

He wanted his father, his mother, his siblings.

But just like any justice system, the world was cold and callous, and the cavity he had just dropped from hissed shut. The entrance to the pit snapped its jaws shut with a jarring, vicious crack, like an uncaring, corrupt judge striking a gavel, condemning an innocent life to death.

The entire nation ofSnezhnaya pulsed with the power of the Cryo Archon, and even if Ajax couldn't pinpoint exactly what that sensation felt like, he could definitely feel its absence, and the jolt to his system when that connection was cut off so suddenly, like a curious child yanking out the arm of an insect.

It wasn't fair.

He continued to fall.

Ajax could feel nothing, and could see nothing,except for his imminent demise.

In the vast void of emptiness, Ajax could barely hear the wind whistling past him as he continued to plummet downwards, unable to do anything to slow his descent. He couldn't open his eyes, and even if he could, he wouldn't be able tosee any change in his surroundings.

He continued falling.

And falling.

At last, the whistling changed, and Ajax cracked his eyelids open the tiniest bit, hoping he could still somehow salvage this situation. Just in time too, he could see that his body was hurtling towards the ground at an alarming speed, some kind of landmass getting closer and closer at a frighteningrate.

In a last ditch effort, Ajax tilted his body, trying his best to fall sideways, desperately trying to remember the survival lessons his father and brother taught him. He slammed into the ground, ripping a choked scream from the his throat as he rolled into a ball, doing his best to protect his head.

The boy rolled to a halt when his back made contact with a cliff wall, and Ajax let out a breath he hadn't known he was holding. T he air was suffocating, the pressure so intense that Ajax felt like he would pass out immediately.

His body was shaking, trembling, but it wasn't from the cold; wherever he had fallen felt like a hot summer day compared to Snezhnaya's regular blizzards, especially when he was wearing two thick winter coats and a warm fleece undershirt.

He was already exhausted from his scuffle on the surface, but weariness was creeping into his body, almost like the very air around him was draining his energy and sapping his strength. He had no idea where he was, but Ajax was born in a nation ruled by an Archon, and deep-seated fears that were ingrained into his very being were surfacing.

He refused to die here.

The boy prayed to the Tsaritsa, hoping that he hadn't fallen so far down that he was outside of her realm of power, praying that she could do something to aid him, but he knew it was futile.

He didn't know where he was, but one thing was for sure.

This wasn't the land of the Archons, or any of the other gods, for that matter.

The divine had no power here.

Chapter 5: Let's not waste time

Chapter Text

The lights in the room flickered back on, but everyone was still frozen in place, stunned by what they had just seen.

They didn't know where the boy had fallen into; heck, this was just supposed to be some memory recorded in the Ley Lines.

But everyone instinctively knew that this was one place that no one should ever go to, somewhere no one should ever hope to survive.

Zhongli snarled internally, unconsciously baring his fangs; so his precious Tartagliahadfallen in the the Abyss. At the mere age of fourteen as well; it was a miracle that the boy had lived to the current day, especially considering the fact he jumped at the opportunity to fight everything and anything.

Eyeing Tartaglia out of the corner of his eye, Zhongli could tell that the Harbinger was definitely not enjoying having his past experiences being shown to everyone, watching as Qiqi turned to pat the man on the arm comfortingly.

The boy was usually good at hiding his emotions, though Zhongli could see through him rather easily, but right now, Tartaglia clearly looked uneasy and distressed.

Even Qiqi was able to pick up on his feelings, even if she couldn't exactly figure out what was wrong.

"Wha... what... is that..." Thoma stammered, clearly shaken up, "Where was that?"

Zhongli instinctively opened his mouth to answer, but Venti screeched vehemently in his head.

"Shut it, Morax, unless you want everyone in Liyue to know your true identity."

The ex-archon slammed his mouth shut and glared at Venti, grateful for the reminder yet also annoyed for telling him to shut up so rudely. Venti glanced back at him, shaking his head, and it was times like this that reminded Zhongli that Venti was also an ex-archon, and while he was appeared to be carefree and relaxed, he saw and heard everything, being the embodiment of wind itself; he knew a lot more than he let on.

"The Abyss. A place that never gives, only takes." Ei was the one to reply, though there was a certain stiffness in her voice that indicated that she too was shaken up. Yae gently patted her on the back reassuringly.

The only one who seemed barely phased was Ayato, "Hmm... I have read about this "Abyss" in some ancient texts... though admittedly they did not contain much content..."

"An old, evil, all-encompassing darkness filled with a wicked, unworldly power, being able to corrupt even the most ancient of elemental beings." Xiao clenched his fists tighter, "A place where no illuminated beast could ever hope to survive, let alone a mortal."

But one had survived; Childe has fallen into this hellhole and had somehow escaped. It was testament to just how unique and special this mortal was.

Jean cleared her throat, "Let's continue watching. Clearly this is important. Maybe we're here to figure out a way to help him."

"About that... Paimon doesn't think we can can do that." Paimon winced, watching as Albedo stood up from his armchair to inspect the now dull crystal and conversing with Aether quietly. After some more poking and prodding, Albedo spoke up, "I believe the crystal needs to recharge before we can continue watching anymore memories."

"Can we just get Master Childe to... you know... poke it again?" Hutao offered, "Since it appeared after he did and we got the thing to work after he touched it."

"The crystal was already fully charged; Childe only activated it." Albedo explained, "I'm not sure what energy source this crystal runs on, but if it is showing memories stored in the Ley Lines, logically, giving it some time to passively absorb Irminsul Energetics, or Ley Line energy, would, in theory, revitalize the crystal."

"But... you can't just end off there!" Xingqiu yelped, "A cliffhanger! It's like those novels where the plot isn't resolved until the next volume"

"I'm afraid we can't do anything about it." Albedo shrugged, "The best we can do is wait, see if the crystal starts working again, and continue watching. If that doesn't work... then we have to try and find another means of revitalizing the crystal."

"So... what now?" Diluc grunted, "Are we just going to sit around here and do nothing? At the very least I'd rather finish up the paperwork regarding the winery stock."

"Now now, Master Diluc." Kaeya spoke up in his usual, mocking tone, "Why not use this opportunity to relax? You rarely take breaks, and you're always so stressed and wound up. No wonder you're so grouchy all the time."

"This is why the Knights of Favonius are always so inefficient." Diluc snapped back.

Jean pinched the bridge of her nose, "Can you two please stop bickering like children?"

"It appears that we'll be stuck here for the foreseeable future, so we should all try to get along, no?" Venti grinned, "It would be nice if we had some dandelion wine..."

"There are minors here." Ningguang stated firmly, "No alcohol."

Venti groaned in exasperation, and Xiao muttered, "I really want some almond tofu."

Aether rummaged around, before pulling out an Adepti Seeker's Stove, "Well... we can make some food, I guess? Not sure if I have enough ingredients though... most of my stash is in my teapot."

"Speaking of the teapot..." Chongyun spoke up, "Is it possible for us to... access that realm from here? Could we use it to escape via the Teleport Waypoints?"

"I've tried to use the Teleport Waypoints earlier, and I couldn't even detect them like I usually do." Aether winced, "And about the teapot... honestly, I'm not sure. I don't want to risk it, though; what if I attempt to enter and I end up trapped somewhere outside of Teyvat? Are we even still in Teyvat?"

"Zhongli, any opinions?" Hutao grinned, "You're our resident history book, after all!"

"Hmm... From my understanding of the Adepti Arts, the Serenitea Pot functions as a portable realm, and thus, while you, Aether, are bringing the teapot around as you go about your adventures, you are also physically carrying that realm around with you." Zhongli brought his hand to his chin, thinking deeply, "As for the "Waypoints", I believe that since you are carrying the teapot around, Tubby, the little helper that Madame Ping dispatched to help you, is able to direct some of your power through the teapot, allowing anyone with a Realm Dispatch to your teapot to access these Waypoints, using the Serenitea Pot as a medium. However, you have to be in close proximity for Tubby to be able to do so, though that isn't much of an issue unless you were particularly forgetful one day."

"So it's a pocket dimension." Ayato mused, "Theoretically, we should be able to access this "Serenitea Pot", but since it's a realm within another realm, our access to the outside is still cut off. But we should still have access to the supplies and other items in this teapot. Interesting."

"Correct, Commissioner Kamisato." Zhongli nodded, "However, Tubby is far more familiar with the inner workings of the Serenitea Pot than I am, and she may have more ideas. Chubby also has a tendency to visit various Adepti realms; if he is present, perhaps he may be of aid as well."

"Okay, so first things first, Childe, Thoma, Noelle, you guys are great at cooking, you think you can help whip up some dishes?" Aether asked.

The trio in question nodded, and Tartaglia smirked at Thoma and Noelle, almost as if he was challenging to a cooking competition, and Aether passed Noelle his last Realm Dispatch (he wanted to give it to Ayato so the Commissioner could have a safe place to rest, since the man really could use a break from all the assassination attempts, but they were teleported into this weird place before he even had the chance to do so).

"We can help too. We'll need more hands to bring all the dishes out, too. And I'll say, I make some really good skewers." Kaeya gestured towards Diluc and himself. The redhead groaned, but the fact he didn't verbally complain was indication that he agreed with the blue haired man.

"Alright, can you guys start compiling all the food orders or something?" Aether brought his teapot out, "I'll go have a chat with Tubby, and see if Chubby happens to be around. I'll also ask her if we can bring more than nine people into the realm at a time. If it's possible, I can make more beds and we can have a proper place to rest while waiting for the crystal to recharge."

With that, Aether shimmered out of existence, and Tartaglia plastered a fake smile onto his face, doing his best to hide the tremble of his voice, "So... what do you all want for dinner?"

"Come, Zhongli, Consultant of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor. Let's... talk." Ningguang looked up at the ex-Archon, with Ganyu by her side.

"Ah, yes, Lady Ningguang. Very well." Zhongli nodded.

"Hey! If you're talking to my consultant, let me in too!" Hutao turned away from her conversation with Chongyun and Xingqiu, and ran towards them. Meanwhile, Beidou was occupied by Kazuha, who was introducing her to the Kamisato siblings.

"Apologies, Director Hu." Ningguang shook her head, trying to think of an excuse to shoo Hutao away, before noticing that Xiao had stood up and was making his way towards them, past the Knights of Favonius, who were discussing on their course of action now that they were stuck here temporarily.

Perfect.

"This is a sensitive matter regarding the Adepti, and I'd rather as few people know of what I am to say." Ningguang calmly stated, "Adeptus Xiao, the Vigilant Yaksha, would you care to join us?"

The Anemo user nodded silently, and Hutao grinned, "Okay! Gotcha! Don't be too long though, or we might be able to think up some pranks!"

The girl ran off towards the stove that Aether had left before entering his teapot, eliciting some yelling from Chongyun, "No! Hutao! You can't cook, you'll burn the food!"

Ningguang led the group to a small corner of the room, and Venti winked at Zhongli, sticking his tongue out cheekily,"Don't worry, I'll keep your little chat a secret from the others."

Zhongli had to admit, Venti was as unpredictable as the wind, but he was extremely attentive and reliable... as long as he wasn't drunk.

"So... Zhongli... or should would it be more appropriate for me to say, Lord of Geo, Rex Lapis."

The Prime Adeptus sighed heavily, "I figured."

"Ganyu and I both had our suspicions." Ningguang admitted, "You appeared in Liyue Harbor out of nowhere, and you are an expert in not just ancient traditions for sending off fallen adepti, but also in Liyue's laws and history. The fact that the Exuvia had fallen during the Rite of Descension, and yet, Liyue Harbor still hums with the power of the Geo, is a clear indication that something wasn't as it seemed."

"Very well." Zhongli nodded, "So... what is it that the Tianquan of the Liyue Qixing wants to speak to me about. I doubt this conversation is just to confirm my identity."

"I want to understand something. Ganyu sensed the presence of multiple Sigils of Permission, despite their age and rarity, and the other adepti had also mentioned that Aether was only able to talk to them because he had a Sigil of Permission, even though he had only just set foot into Liyue." Ningguang bluntly stated, "It seems to me that you, my lord, were the one orchestrating Osial's attack, which is something I cannot figure out the reason for."

Zhongli took a deep breath, before he told them the truth.

He told them of the aeons he spent fighting for Liyue's survival, how he watched small streets and villages grew into the flourishing city of Liyue Harbor, how he could feel that time was taking his toll on him, his hesitance to retire without confirmation that Liyue could stand on its own without its local deity, and the contract he had made with the Cryo Archon that would finally allow him to rest in peace.

"My lord! I... we never knew..." Ganyu looked like she was about to cry, "We could have helped!"

"Thank you for your explanation." Ningguang nodded, "However... one thing still confuses me... and that is your relationship with the Harbinger Tartaglia. After all, he had decided to unleash Osial without prompting from either archon, or the other harbinger..."

"That is something I do not understand either." Xiao grumbled.

"Xiao," Zhongli addressed the Yaksha, "If I had told you to go to Snezhnaya to retrieve the Cryo Archon's Gnosis, or rather, any Archon for that matter, would you do it?"

"Absolutely, my lord, I-" Xiao paused in realization, considering his words, and the ex-Archon nodded, "Precisely. Childe was merely acting out of loyalty for his Archon's wishes. I do not think it is fair to judge him purely from this event alone, with him also having been manipulated by his Archon and co-worker, along with me being contractually obligated to hide the truth from him. I have yet to find a good time to apologize to him regarding this, and I'm afraid he is purposely avoiding me."

Zhongli paused, allowing Ningguang, Ganyu and Xiao to consider his words, before continuing, "Other than that, Childe hasn't been of any trouble. He only picks a fight with monsters, or those who do not honor their contracts. He's eager to learn of Liyue's culture, always listening to me whenever I am giving an explanation to something of importance. We have had many meals together, and talked about a variety of topics, and to someone like me, his opinions are rather insightful. Admittedly, he has been of very pleasant company."

Xiao looked like they were having an existential crisis, and Ganyu looked a little surprised.

Ningguang let out a small amused chuckle, almost as if she were aware of a secret no one else was privy to, before she finished, "Very well. I understand the reason behind your actions, and I hope that you will continue to be satisfied with Liyue Harbour's progress in the future. I also trust your judgement in the Archon of Cryo, so I won't pry into the details. The Mora issue is also in the process of being dealt with. I think we can end this talk on a high note."

"Thank you, Lady Ningguang." Zhongli nodded, before he turned around, watching as Kaeya popped out of thin air with some roasted chicken, placing the plate on a table that they must have pulled out from the teapot realm.

"It appears that they have finishing up with the cooking." The ex-Archon commented.

"It appears so." Ningguang agreed, "Shall we join them? And perhaps... now that we are stuck here... you can talk to Harbinger Tartaglia and clear things up with him."

Chapter 6: Hear the inferno's call

Chapter Text

Dinner was a relatively cheery affair, even though they were going through the events of their days, trying to figure out what had caused them to be teleported into this strange realm in the first place.

Their group had several very good cooks, and with the large variety of ingredients in Aether's teapot, they were able to cover a wide range of cuisines from Mondstadt, Liyue, Inazuma and even Snezhnaya.

Except for the fact they were missing one person.

"Where's Childe? Doesn't he want to eat too? " Gorou asked, flicking his ears as he avoided an attempt by Yae to pat his head as she reached over his shoulder for more sushi.

"Please leave my General alone, Lady Yae." Kokomi huffed, "But where is Childe? We do know he was fighting an Abyss Lector... but other than that..."

"He's uh... "not hungry"." Aether replied, lifting his hands in air quotes, "Which is Childe-speech for"I am kind of upset and I want to be alone". He kind of locked himself in his room, and knowing what we just saw, I'm not surprised that he's upset."

"He has his own room in your teapot?" Xiao asked, more curious rather than hostile.

"Yeah. Since he's technically still a diplomat for Liyue but he has to conduct investigations in Inazuma, it allows him to access the Waypoints easily. Plus, he gets injured all the time, so he pops in from time to time to patch himself up, or some emergency wound dressing before seeing a proper doctor." Aether sighed, "At this point, his room's pretty much where we stock all the medical supplies. I worry about him sometimes. He's going to give me a heart attack one day."

Sara frowned, "Wasn't there a different Fatui diplomat in Inazuma? Some lady in white?"

"Ah... her..." Ei munched on her dango, eliciting some snickering from Yae, "There is no need to worry about her."

"I see..." Zhongli murmured, placing his chopsticks down, unable to eat his Jade Parcel, and opting for a Chicken-Mushroom Skewer instead. He was proud of Liyue's gastronomy, and any other day he would eagerly be trying out the dumpling (he heard Thoma mention that he had tried cooking this batch) and giving his comments on the Liyuen dish.

Usually, when he and Tartaglia would meet up, they would order an assortment of dishes, ranging from Black-Back Perch Stew to Crystal Shrimps and everything in between. And in between bites, Zhongli would start talking about each dish, and how the Li and the Yue styles of each of them differed, while Tartaglia listened attentively.

Ever since Tartaglia had found out his true identity, they had stopped meeting up for meals. Zhongli would still go to Wanmin restaurant for meals, but more often than not, he was unable to bring himself to eat anything, and would leave his Lotus Flower Crisps or whatever he had ordered to Hutao or the Ferrylady, or even dropping it off for Tartaglia if he suddenly lost his appetite on his way back to the parlor.

Zhongli even brought his own Mora with him to pay for his meals, hoping that he might just happen to run into Tartaglia, and could finally invite him for a meal that the Harbinger didn't have to foot the bill for.

He was lucky he didn't need to eat to survive, or he would have starved to death long ago. Everything just reminded him of all the good times he had with Tartaglia, and how his heart ached in the Harbinger's absence, even though he knew that it was his fault for hiding the truth.

Heck, the first time Tartaglia found out that Zhongli was joining them on their Spiral Abyss run, the man had been so upset he shoved the former Archon onto Xiao's team, vehemently refusing to even catch a glimpse of the Jade Shield, using the excuse that "a fight is more exciting without a shield".

It had taken weeks of pestering from Aether and Kaeya, before the blonde eventually threatened to not let Tartaglia fight, period. They still haven't talked; to be fair, they were busy fighting monsters, but at least Tartaglia didn't seem to mind him constantly putting his shield up.

But still, Zhongli wished they could go back to the good old days, when Tartaglia would wave at him from the other side of the street, bounding up to him, before they set off towards a restaurant for a meal, or to the outskirts of Liyue Harbor so they could fight some monsters.

"̶O̶h̴h̷h̵h̸,̷ ̵d̸a̸n̶g̶o̶!̶ ̸H̷a̴v̵e̵n̷'̴t̷ ̴h̵a̸d̸ ̵t̶h̵a̶t̸ ̵f̷o̶r̴ ̵a̶ ̶w̵h̵i̵l̸e̷!̷"̷

A flaming Abyss Lector shimmered into existence, right behind Aether. Everyone at the table immediately tensed up, pulling out their weapons, but the blond traveler just sighed and held a dango out to the Lector, "You want some milk with that too? Also you're going to burn the stick in that form."

"Yes, please. I would like that very much."The Lector replied, his "flame-flinging monster" form morphing back to his more human appearance.

Zhongli blinked in absolute confusion, still grasping his polearm tightly. He didn't care if this monster was a friend of Aether's, if he so much ashintedthat he had hurt Tartaglia while he had been down in the Abyss, the retired god would rip his head clean off his shoulders and gut this Abyssal creature with his polearm until there was no remains.

Aether poured a glass of milk for the now human Abyss Lector, like it was a completely normal thing to do, "So, Enjou, what do you want?"

"You..." Xiao choked, "know this... abomination?"

"Rude!"Enjou huffed, though he didn't sound too offended,"As for why I'm here... I was rummaging through some old domains to see if there were any books left behind, and we felt this weird surge of energy from Musk Reef. Naturally, I was curious and decided to investigate, and through some trial and error with Abyssal magic, I kind of found this place. I don't care for a bunch of Vision holders, but I noticed the Traveller was stuck here too, so I'm lending a hand. I'd like to keep this short because I want to continue looking for more books."

The Abyss Lector dipped his dango in the milk, before taking a bite out of it,"This is delicious, by the way. Real good stuff. My compliments to the cook. I guess all that mint, cabbage, and fowl came in handy?"

"At least you know how to appreciate good food!" Paimon sighed, as Aether snickered, "You don't make dango with those ingredients, idiot."

"Back on track. Mind telling me what exactly happened? I can definitely feel some traces of Abyssal energy, but I can't really help you if I don't know what's going on."

"And you want to help us... why, exactly?" Diluc snarled, "You're from the Abyss Order. Shouldn't you be plotting and trying to kill us."

"Well, your little traveler friend is quite nice to be around.And honestly, as good as I am at killing, it really isn't my thing. I'd much rather spend my time reading some ancient tomes or ruins."Enjou shrugged,"Also,Abyssal energy really isn't good for mortals, no matter how weak it is, and I'm not sure how long your Visions can protect you from the more... serious effects. Best you get out of here as soon as possible."

It didn't take too long to fill Enjou in on the situation, and even though pretty much everyone didn't trust the Abyss Lector, they were still stunned by the fact that Aether and Paimon were talking with a Lector that was, oddly enough, cheerily eating dango and nodding along to their story.

"Hmm... yeah, we don't know much about this "Spiral Abyss" place either. But if that place can make monsters stronger and push them past their limits, not to mention the weird Ley Line Disorders, I can see Violet Lightnings possibly having powers like that."Enjou admitted,"They like to preach about revelation and truth, soyeah, your theory that watching the memories would let you out?It should work, since its letting you learn the truth about... well... something."

"Once you've had your surprising revelations or whatever, its job is complete, and it should return you back to your daily lives. As for why one might do something like this... I don't know, maybe they felt insulted or something."The Abyss Lector adjusted his glasses,glancing at thecrystal, "You are also right that allowing it to passively absorb Ley Line energy would be enough to charge it right back up... though it seems like you need some form of Abyssal energy to active it once it's charged."

That got everyone to pause.

Why was Tartaglia was able to activate it?

Could it be...

Looking at the suspicious gazes of the Vision holders, Enjou finished his glass of milk, before sighing,"I'm being serious here. I'm equally stumped as all of you, but at least I know my way around Abyssal energy."

"Can't you just directly teleport us out?" Kaeya raised an eyebrow, but Enjou just shrugged,"Sorry, no can do... unless all of you were dead or something. I mean, I could... but I don't know how the Ley Lines would react to your fragile human bodies. And if you don't trust me, you can hit me or something!"

"Enjou! What is with you and your insistence on getting hit!" Aether pinched the bridge of his nose, as Diluc and Xiao raised their weapons.

"Hold on a second! I've got a glass jaw!"Enjou screeched, flinching away as Diluc set his claymore alight.

"You are definitely the type that enjoys getting beaten up." Paimon huffed, "You along with Childe!"

"I don't think Childe enjoys getting beaten up!" Zhongli defended the Harbinger, "On the contrary, I believe he prefers being the one to do the "beating up"."

Aether groaned, "If I didn't know you were an Abyss Lector, I'd be booking a psychiatrist or something for you."

"And I think that's my cue to leave. Back to book-reading."The Lector chuckled, handing his empty cup back to Aether,"Good luck getting out of here!"

As quickly as he appeared, the Lector morphed back into his monster form, and disappeared in a burst of flames, with no trace of his presence save for an empty glass of milk along with a bare dango stick.

"Want to explain how you ended up on friendly terms with a masoch*stic Abyss Lector?" Kaeya raised an eyebrow, genuinely curious.

"Look, it's a long story. He's been helpful in the past, really." Aether sighed.

"HETOUCHEDTHE BATHYSMAL VISHARP!?TOUCHED!?"

"Please calm down, Your Excellency!"

"In all fairness, he was the one that helped us get there in the first place. I genuinely cannot read a single word of Byakuyakoku's script to save my life."

Zhongli had to admit, he wasn't paying too much attention to what Aether was saying about the Abyss Lector touching the deceased corpse of some visharp vital to some Inazuman ritual... or at least, that's what Zhongli thought he was saying.

He was too busy reheating some Sakura Tempura, Chili-Mince Cornbread Buns and Mondstadt Hash Browns, along with snagging some leftover sushi and putting them on a plate. He figured that the Harbinger hadn't taken any food with him, and he must be hungry after the fight earlier in the day.

That, and combined with the fact that everyone had witnessed his descent into the Abyss, even if they weren't aware of it... Zhongli wasn't surprised that Tartaglia would be mentally exhausted, having his past trauma ripped out and put on display for everyone to see.

And that statement from the Abyss Lector was just the nail in the coffin; it was just a matter of time before the others would put the pieces together.

Using the Realm Dispatch, Zhongli allowed himself into Aether's teapot, and greeting Tubby briefly, he pushed the front door open, careful not to tip his platter of food over.

Zhongli didn't know which room the Harbinger stayed in; he had buried himself in work ever since his falling out with Tartaglia, and had only visited once or twice, usually as a shortcut to the Spiral Abyss. But if he were to guess, Zhongli would say that it was likely for the boy to take one of the three rooms on the first floor, since it was unreasonable to expect him to climb up two flights of stairs just to get access to some medical supplies while injured.

One of the rooms of the Liyuen-styled house was the kitchen, and the room that was opposite the kitchen was a lounge. Tartaglia was unlikely to be there, but just to be sure, Zhongli checked the longue in case the younger Snezhnayan wanted the heat of the fireplace.

No Fatui Harbinger to be found.

Zhongli sighed, and walked over to the other corridor, before knocking on the door, "Childe?"

No response.

He knocked on the door again, but he still didn't hear anything from the young Harbinger. Zhongli was tempted to just break the door down, but then Aether and Tubby would have to fix it, and the ex-Archon didn't want to trouble the Traveller.

Instead, he tested the doorknob, and much to his surprise, the door wasn't locked.

That was odd, and anxiety was bubbling up in Zhongli's gut. If Tartaglia wanted his privacy, he would usually lock the door to his office, and if the consultant visited the Northland Bank, the Harbinger would unlock the door on his own to let him in.

Zhongli couldn't help himself. He gently pushed the door open, and looked around the dark room.

"Childe?"

His golden eyes skimmed over the contents of the room, looking for any trace of the Harbinger, before noticing that the man was sitting on the floor, back against the bed, wrapping his arms around his legs as he rested his head against his knees.

"There you are, Childe." Zhongli heaved a sigh of relief, "I brought some food for you. You missed dinner."

The boy didn't even respond, and the ex-Archon furrowed his brow, worried for his friend. He placed the plate of food down on a table, before he crouched down next to the Harbinger.

"Tartaglia?"

Still no response.

"Ajax."

Tartaglia blinked, and looked up at the consultant, his blue eyes looking even more dead than usual.

"So... you figured it out." The Harbinger chuckled quietly, but the strain in his voice was evident. The man rested his chin against his knees, turning his gaze towards the ground, "You always did know me so well,Xiansheng."

Chapter 7: What a small price to pay

Chapter Text

Xiansheng.

Zhongli didn't know how much he missed the nickname coming from Tartaglia, but he didn't like how pained the Harbinger sounded. The god's heart clenched, and he carefully maneuvered his body, sitting on the floor beside the boy.

"Childe... are you... alright?"

Zhongli felt like it was a really stupid question to ask. Of course he wasn't okay; otherwise he wouldn't be running away from the rest of Aether's friends and hiding away in his room.

He didn't get a response from the youngest Harbinger, and Zhongli had no idea how to comfort him; he wasn't the best at dealing with emotions.

"I... didn't know." The ex-Archon broke the silence.

Zhongli didn't know it was even possible for Tartaglia to slump even further, resting his hands against the floor, his bangs covered his eyes.

"You didn't have to know." The boy whispered, his entire body trembling, "No one had to know."

Here, in the dark, no longer having to put up his facade as the Harbingers' unpredictable vanguard, Tartaglia look all the more vulnerable; sometimes, even the ex-Archon of Geo forgot that while the Eleventh Harbinger was one of the most dangerous members of the Fatui, Tartaglia was still young, even amongst the mortals within the Cryo Archon's ranks.

The two of them just sat there in silence, until Tartaglia started to nod off. His eyes started to droop, and the Fatui shook his head gently, trying to keep himself awake. On a good day, his nightmares were already filled with flashbacks, the horrors that he'd encountered in the bottomless depths haunting him within the confines of his own mind.

Tartaglia didn't want to sleep. He didn't want everyone to see how weak Ajax was.

But his body was betraying him; he was already tired from fighting in the Spiral Abyss, and he still hadn't fully recovered from using his Foul Legacy Transformation during Teucer's stay in Liyue and his previous usage in the Golden House, not to mention that he had skipped lunch before going to the Spiral Abyss, and had just missed dinner as well.

He felt a warm pair of arms that were as solid as stone wrapping around him, and for the first time since his descent into the darkness, Tartaglia finally felt safe.

"So I've consulted with Tubby." Aether started, "While it is possible for her to make more Realm Dispatches, she doesn't think it's too safe to do so while in this strange realm. It's outside of her comfort zone, and adepti sigils and magic and stuff like that are complex, so she doesn't want to risk it. But if it's just for short-term use, like the bathroom, Tubby thinks it would be fine."

"That makes sense." Ganyu nodded, "Rain Calmer is a gentle soul. She wouldn't want to hurt anyone, even by accident."

"We've got six Realm Dispatches." Aether continued, "I guess we'll just pick at random who stays in the teapot for the nights? And rotate people around everyday until we get out."

"I thought there were eight." Diluc blinked in confusion.

"Aiya, the remaining two are probably with Master Childe and Zhongli." Hutao laughed, "Leave them be! Those two better make up, or I'll lock them in a closet and force them to!"

"Something is bothering me." Kazuha frowned, "That Abyss Lector... he mentioned that Abyssal Energy is required in order to activate the crystal. Neither Venti, Aether, nor Albedo were able to do it... but one touch by Tartaglia was able to do so..."

Diluc frowned, "Are you trying to imply that the Harbinger is this "Ajax" person, and he was the one that fell into the Abyss?"

"That does seem like the most likely conclusion..." Kokomi mused, "He looked rather... how do I say it... upset? Worried?"

"Come on, now. Perhaps you're all just overthinking it." Yae just chuckled, "A portal to the Abyss opened up in a forest in his homeland. Maybe he's just worried that his family might accidentally stumble in."

Venti and Ei both rolled their eyes internally; it was clear that Yae had come to the same conclusion as they had, but at this point, the Kitsune just enjoyed messing with everyone else, and fully intended to confuse the heck out of the rest of the mortals.

"He did have a younger brother..." Ningguang added, and Aether sweatdropped, "I... didn't think you were aware of that..."

"He was a stowaway. Of course we would keep track of that." The Tianquan stated, "That, and your bargains for the kite and Chef Mao's cooking wasn't exactly subtle. And his claims at the wharf that Liyuen fish were small pretty much caught everyone's attention."

"So you're saying that... Childe is worried his little brother might fall into the Abyss?" Noelle asked, still a little confused by all the new revelations, "To be fair, I'd be worried too."

"Yeah, and the entirety of Snezhnaya is corrupted with Abyssal energy, so that's why the Harbinger can activate the crystal." Diluc sarcastically deadpanned.

"Aren't you the smart one? That is totally possible!" Yae snickered, and walked over to the red-head, roughly ruffling his hair and eliciting a strangled sounding squawk from the vigilante, "I must say, I'm having so many ideas for light novels! Now... how to weave this into a coherent plot..."

Kaeya snickered as Yae continued to harass Diluc, with the Pyro user trying his best to push her away without pissing her off.

"You are all making this situation far more complicated than it already is." Keqing sighed, but Jean interrupted them before they could discuss this further, "I know you all have your opinions on this matter. But I suggest that we all get some rest, so we can continue watching whatever the crystal is supposed to show us once it's recharged. We can continue this conversation tomorrow."

Aether, Beidou and Jean grabbed some pieces of paper and tore them into smaller pieces, before scribbling down everyone's names. They folded them all up, and dumped them in a clean cup.

"Alright." Beidou announced, shaking the cup viciously to jumble all the names, "I'll pick out six names, and they will being staying in Aether's teapot for the night."

The six names randomly picked out were Ayato, Xingqiu, Keqing, Barbara, Gorou and Kazuha, but the Yashiro Commissioner wanted to stay with his sister and housekeeper, offering his spot to Chongyun instead.

"Let's go." Aether grinned proudly, "I've been wanting to show off my teapot for a while now! I'll show you around!"

Tartaglia yawned blearily, pressing his cheek against whatever he was leaning against as he wiggled into a more comfortable position, pulling the blanket up, before closing his eyes again to catch up on more sleep.

It's been a long time since he was ever able to wake up without someone screaming at him to get out of bed, whether it being the sergeants when he had just been conscripted into the Fatui, Ekaterina trying her best to make him finish his paperwork, or even just him being unable to sleep in general, on the lookout for malicious schemes or backstabbing.

Right now, he felt calm and relaxed, and even the dark voices that usually echoed about inside his head, urging him to slice everyone's heads off, were silent.

The Harbinger let out a small, content rumble from the back of his throat, before slowly snuggling up to the source of warmth that was right next to him.

Hold on... what source of warmth...

Tartaglia's eyes snapped open, and he took in his surroundings. He was still in his room in Aether's teapot, the door was closed, there was a cold plate of food on a table, he was wrapped up in a nice warm blanket, and his Fatui mask was sitting idly on the bed behind him, which also happened to be missing its usual blanket.

How anyone had managed to remove it without him realizing, Tartaglia would never know.

Then he took notice of the additional person in his room; Zhongli was sitting right next to him, fast sleep. Or rather, he was leaning on Zhongli, using the ex-Archon's shoulder as a pillow. Said god also had an arm draped over his shoulders, gently yet firmly holding him in place, and his other hand was resting elegantly in his lap.

The Harbinger shook his head in confusion, trying to make sure he wasn't still dreaming, waking Zhongli up in the process.

"Ah. Good morning." Zhongli greeted, snapping to attention almost immediately, "How was your rest?"

"One of the best I've ever had." Tartaglia grudgingly admitted, "Did you... stay here the entire night? That can't possible be comfortable."

"It's nothing." The god said, "However... about yesterday-"

"I'm fine." Tartaglia hastily replied, frowning, and Zhongli could tell that the man was already putting his"I'm a tough unflappable Fatui Harbinger"facade back up, "Why are you still continuing this act of pretending to care? I tried to drown your precious little city, but even then, I was still just a pawn in your scheme, wasn't I? Was it amusing, purposely feeding me intel and watch me run around like a headless chicken trying to find Rex Lapis, only for him to be right in front of me the entire time?"

Zhongli had no idea how to deal with this. He wanted to help his friend, but it was clear that Tartaglia still wanted nothing to do with him; if anything, he was pushing him away. Perhaps it was too early; the boy was probably still mad at him for the deceit. Naturally, Tartaglia wouldn't want to talk to him about his traumatic experience in the Abyss.

Maybe he should use this opportunity to apologize first? After all, Zhongli had never made contact with the Harbinger, thinking that he needed some more time to cool off, but perhaps that had been a mistake on his part.

"Childe... I apologize for hiding my true identity from you. It was not my intention to hurt you, but rather, I had to abide by the terms of the contract I had signed with the Tsaritsa." Zhongli looked down at the floor, unable to meet the Harbinger's gaze, "However, please believe me when I say that you are not merely a pawn to me."

Tartaglia let out a dry chuckle, as if he didn't believe him, "Oh? I'm not a pawn,Xiansheng? So, what am I then?"

"Forgive me, I am still unfamiliar with human emotions." Zhongli sighed, "While our outings did start out as business related, where I was supposed to teach you more about Liyue to aid in your work, it became more than that."

Tartaglia pulled his blanket tighter around himself, but listened quietly.

"Over time, I learnt that you are a kind, exceptional young man. You are a powerful warrior, and yet, I've seen you play with the young ones by the wharf on your days off. You are an intriguing enigma, and the fact that someone like you, who'd much rather beat up a Ruin Guard, would stay behind to listen to everything I said about history and culture... it truly made me feel... apologies, this is something I cannot tell you... purely because I have no idea what it is. But I assure you that it is positive."

If the conversation at hand wasn't so serious, the Harbinger would be snickering; who knew that the esteemed, eloquent Zhongli-xianshengof the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor, the man who could speak for hours on end about the history and creation of any random mountain in Liyue, would be struggling to talk aboutfeelings.

"I enjoyed meeting with you, and genuinely looked forward to our next outing. Every time we would meet for a sumptuous meal, discussing various topics and debating over differing opinions... I must admit, I had not felt this content in a very long time." Zhongli continued, "However... afterthatincident, when I waited for you at the usual time at Wanmin Restaurant and you never showed up, I was left with a certain emptiness inside that feels vastly different from losing my Gnosis, yet all the more painful. I understood that you were upset with me, but I did not wish to seek you out and make you even more angry, so I figured I'll give you some time to cool off."

"You didn't think that a few months was too long to"cool off"?" Tartaglia snorted, before he rememberedwhyhe had been sent to Liyue in the first place, "Though... I guess to you, it all passed like a blink of an eye. You've lived for so long, what's a few months to you?"

"In hindsight... a few months was far too long. I really should have apologized earlier, and I hope you understand that I'm being sincere. I am also amenable to that fight that you were hoping for, though I would still like to say that I will restrain myself because I do not wish to kill you." Zhongli turned to the Harbinger, "If you are still not convinced, on top of that, I can even sign a contract to guarantee that everything that I've said is nothing but the truth, and-"

"No more contracts. You're retired, you're not obligated to sign contracts for everything, especially not... this... But we will have that fight, just for formalities. I've always wanted to fight a god." Tartaglia interrupted, "I know you did what you had to do... and it's totally against your nature to break a contract."

The Harbinger slumped against the ex-Archon, "I was upset because... Our friendship was built upon lies. I thought you were playing with my feelings. I thought you were just using me... and once I served my purpose, you'd just toss me aside like some broken artillery and forget about me."

"Losing your friendship and company was the only part of my retirement plan that I regretted, the only thing that made me wish that this plan hadn't come to fruition, and we could continue to meet up daily for meals and drinks. Had I been given more time, I surely would have re-negotiated the terms of my contract with the Tsaritsa." Zhongli admitted, "And I apologize, perhaps I'm not as good as reading you as you and I both assumed. I had thought that you would stomp up to me and pester me for a fight once your colleague had left Liyue, before yelling at me throughout the duration of our spar."

"Ha!" Tartaglia laughed, "I should have done that, really. We could have avoided this whole mess. Kind of hard to do that while Ningguang was literally destroying us with regard to our foreign relations, and I had to do all sorts of sh*t to get it to settle down. Honestly, I still have no idea what on earth had happened... I hate politics."

They settled back into comfortable silence, and Tartaglia had nearly dozed off again when a knock on the door startled him back into reality, before a blonde poked his head into the room.

"Childe? Zhongli? You guys doing okay?"

"Good morning, Aether." Zhongli calmly greeted, "Did something happen? Are we late?"

"No, no, not at all. Most of the others are still asleep... but I think Hutao and Ayato are making breakfast... uh..." Aether let out a nervous laugh, "I don't think Thoma can stop the both of them..."

Tartaglia grinned, still cocooned up in his blanket, "We're on the job, don't worry, Comrade!"

Aether smiled back, "Thanks. Jean and Albedo need some help waking the others up so we can continue watching...that... None of us like this situation... but I think everyone wants to get out of here as soon as possible, including you guys."

The blonde closed the door behind him, missing the way Tartaglia had tensed up, curling in on himself, muttering, "Oh... yeah... that..."

Zhongli peered down at the Harbinger, unsure of what to do. Whenever he was busy with paperwork, Hutao loved to throw her arms around him, chattering away at how he should take vacation days or how stressed he looked. He's seen Xiangling hugging her father when he praised her for the creation of a new dish, and he's watched Xingqiu practically throwing himself at Chongyun on many occasions whenever he was too busy with Feiyun Commerce Guild endeavors and his work coincided with the release of a new volume of some book, and the latter would pick it up for him before it was all sold out.

Surely that would be an appropriate course of action here?

Worst case scenario, Tartaglia would just push him away and the ex-Archon could think of another way of comforting him.

Zhongli pulled the Snezhnayan in for a hug, wrapping his arms around the man gently, and his inner dragon purred in delight when Tartaglia not only melted into his touch, but also rested his head back against his shoulder.

He could hear every breath his companion took, could feel the burning ambition in his beating heart, and a very sudden reminder that the Harbinger was, in fact, still human, and combined with his recklessness, could disappear at any moment.

He couldn't afford to lose him. Not again.

"You are strong, Childe. There's no denying that." Zhongli stated bluntly, "But should there ever be a time that you require a shield... I will always be there for you."

Tartaglia turned red, "Xiansheng!You can't just say something like that!"

"That is the truth." Zhongli turned to the Harbinger, "You mean a lot to me. Whether you are called back to Snezhnaya for a war, or down in the depths of Enkanomiya... I will always be available to lend you my aid."

"Stupid old dragon." Tartaglia snorted, "Come on, let's grab some breakfast. All the food your brought yesterday is cold, and we did promise Aether we would prevent his teapot from burning down."

"OH MY ARCHONS!"

If Zhongli wasn't a god, he would have nearly choked to death on his Matsutake Meat Roll that he had taught the Harbinger to make, as Hutao flung herself at him. Tartaglia was snickering, stabbing his chopsticks through the meat roll instead of using his utensils the proper way, and popped it into his mouth, "Morning, Hutao!"

"You two finally made up!" Hutao screeched in delight, "Aiya, took you long enough!"

"Director Hu, I would appreciate it greatly if I could enjoy my breakfast without choking." Zhongli deadpanned.

"But Zhongli!" She wailed dramatically, "You're actually eating again!"

"Ha ha... uh... what do you mean "eating again"?" Tartaglia sweatdropped, as the Director of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor continued rambling on, "Master Childe, can you believe that Zhongli actually started bringing his Mora around without needing to be reminded every five minutes? Because I sure can't, and I'm the one always watching him leave for lunch, and then return a minute later to fetch his wallet before setting out for real!"

Tartaglia blinked in confusion as Hutao continued, "And then that man just doesn't eat whatever he buys! He comes back to his office, sulks for a little while, and then leaves it for me or Ferrylady, or even for you! Don't tell me that you've never got a food package from Zhongli before?"

"Wait... all that Liyuen food was from him? I didn't see any additional expenses besides the regular Fatui stuff... so I didn't think it was from you!" The Harbinger turned to Zhongli, who just stuffed the remaining meat roll in his mouth to avoid answering the question.

"Director Hu, are you stalking me?"

"No no no! Zhongli, I wouldn't dare do such a thing! I talked to Ms Ekaterina a few times regarding your Fatui sponsorship, and she told me that you would pop in every now and then to give food to Master Childe! Xiangling also tells me about your patronage, and I've seen the food you've left for us." Hutao huffed, "You haven't been eating anything you've bought! You better have some instant noodles stocked at home or something, because I don't want to bury my best consultant simply because he starved to death!"

"I am not contractually obligated to talk about matters outside the workplace. And I will not starve to death, as you call it." Zhongli stated with an air of finality.

"Hmph!" Hutao crossed her arms, before turning to Tartaglia, "Well, you better take care of him, Fatui Boy! Because if I see Zhongli moping around like a lost puppy one more time, I will come and put an end to you myself! And I won't give you a funeral!"

"I do not mope around." The ex-Archon interjected, only to be interrupted by a loud screech from the kitchen, "My lord! Why is there egg shells in the Egg Rolls?!"

"Oi! Don't continue cooking without me!" Hutao yelled back, and she rushed back into the kitchen.

"We aren't going to catch a break until we continue watching the memories, are we?" Chongyun sighed, shaking his head as he entered the lounge.

Zhongli glanced at Tartaglia, who slapped the fakest looking smile Zhongli had ever seen on his face as he looked back at the god, "Don't worry about it."

Chapter 8: The end is nigh

Chapter Text

Breakfast was... an interesting affair, so to speak.

It started off with Ayato and Hutao hogging the stove, which shouldn't be a bad thing, but the duo had a tendency to make... very suspicious looking dishes, and Thoma and Chongyun ended up as their little test subjects until Zhongli offered to stuff Hutao in a closet and lock her inside by using one of his Stone Steles to barricade the entrance, and Ayaka berated her brother for unintentionally giving Thoma food poisoning; he couldn't find the Sakura Blooms and instead, mixed Sea Ganoderma and Seagrass into his signature dish, Quiet Elegance.

Then, after finishing their breakfast, Tartaglia started cooking for the others, only to be joined by Barbara and Beidou soon after. Venti had stumbled in at one point, asking for alcohol, before he was booted out of the kitchen by a very grouchy Diluc who has a sleepy Kaeya draped over him.

Kazuha had already made himself a small meal, and was watching the chaos in amusem*nt as Ei tried to cook something while everyone else was eating, only to accidentally explode the stove with an Overload reaction, which was immediately put out by Kokomi, leaving Sara to take over the cooking while Yae continued to harass Gorou in the background.

Ganyu was pulling Qiqi away from the group, worried that the others might injure her by accident due to the zombie's short stature, while Ningguang and Keqing just watched while munching on some delicious "Snow on the Hearth" Sakura Mochi made by Ayaka; it was a far cry from her older brother's abysmal cooking skills and his deranged choice of substitute ingredients.

It was a miracle that they were able to settle back down in the initial room they found themselves in just the previous day without any serious injuries. With a variety of blankets and pillows strewn around from the "sleepover" the previous night, the odd realm they found themselves in look a lot more cozy.

"Alright, looks like the crystal is fully charged." Albedo nodded to himself, having just inspected the crystal, "Childe, would you do the honors?"

"Not much of an honor, is it?" Tartaglia grumbled under his breath, glaring at the crystal like it's the source of all of his problems... which it currently was.

Ei leaned back into her armchair and rested her chin on her hand regally, crossing her legs elegantly, looking at the Harbinger with morbid curiosity, as Sara sighed, "The earlier we start, the earlier we get out of here."

Tartaglia sighed, "I guess so..."

He brushed the tip of his finger again the crystal, before slumping back into his shared bean bag with Zhongli and Qiqi, as the entire room turned dark once again.

Ajax slowly opened his eyes, as he pushed himself up. Pressing his back to the wall, the boy peered around cautiously, before determining that he wasn't in any immediate danger.

"Where... am I..." He muttered,looking around, still wary of his surroundings. He couldn't see the ceiling of the chasm, only a purplish sky that faded into darkness, with red clouds akin to vaporized blood dotting the horizon. Violet jagged, ridged cliffs adorned the landscape like the sharp teeth of a gigantic monster, and Ajax wouldn't be surprised if they actually turned out to be the rotten carcass of a foul beast.

"I know this is... the Abyss..." Ei frowned nervously, "But it looks different from what I remember..."

"I... fell..." Realization dawned on the young boy, as his breaths came quicker, forcing him to inhale even more of the foul,putrid air of the corrupted underworld, "No... no no no... this can't be... "

Ajax fell to the ground, wrapping his arms around himself, as he shook his head, "This is just a bad dream... I'm in my bed at home..."

The boy closed his eyes as he brought his hand up to his cheek, pinching it harshly. Ajax flinched, sucking in a deep breath, before he opened his eyes.

He swallowed harshly, as he was greeted with the same morbid scenery as before.

"Okay... okay... this is real... I... I need to get out..."

Ajax pushed himself to his feet. A fter inspecting himself from head to toe and seeing that he didn't have any severe injuries, the boy heaved a sigh of relief.

"I guess... the coats absorbed the most of the damage... but now it's way too hot..." Ajax muttered, peeling his thick winter coats off, but still leaving his fleece undershirt on.

Luckily, the boy also noticed his knife that had fallen a few feet away from him, and he hastily scooped the weapon up.

Holding it close to his chest, Ajax clutched the knife like it was his last lifeline. His bag of supplies had been lost during the descent, and while his gut told him that wherever he was, Mora was useless, he would rather have some bread and water to tide him over until he could figure out how to get home.

If he could even get home.

"Bad Ajax. No negative thoughts." Ajax shook his head, before picking his coats up, racking his brain for ideas, "Okay, first rule of survival;"Tell someone where you're going and when you plan to return"... well, u h... scratch that..."

"Okay, rule number two;"Don't travel alone"... uh... not much of a choice in that..." He continued pondering, "Three;"Take enough food and water to last for at least two days in an emergency"... well I would have, if I didn't drop my bag..."

As serious as the situation was, Xingqiu had to stifle a snicker.

"Uh..."Wear layered clothing"..."Don't panic if you become lost"..."Prepare a shelter. Build a fire, if necessary. Signal for help."... Something tells me that building a fire wouldn't be the smartest thing to do... if I could even make in the first place." Ajax grumbled, before taking a deep breath, "Okay... I have a sword. And no supplies. So-"

"YHARGGG!"

"EEP! Monster!" Barbara yelped, but Jean gently inched closer to her sister.

The boy whirled around instantly, brandishing his sword, noticing that some Hilichurls had noticed him, and were charging in his direction.

Ajax steeled himself, and with the agility that he couldn't display in Snezhnaya due to the hindrance of his thick winter coats, the boy elegantly sliced through the Hilichurls, reducing them to nothing but dust, leaving only a mask behind as proof of their existence.

Exhaling, Ajax stepped back, examining the lone Damaged Mask that had been left behind, before shaking his head, opting to not pick it up.

"Thank goodness they were only Hilichurls, and not a Mitachurl or a Lawachurl or something..." The boy grabbed his coats, before taking in his surroundings once more, "I guess... I'll try to first some shelter first... or maybe a river... there is a river in here, right? "

Zhongli gently grabbed Tartaglia's hand, squeezing it comfortingly, as everyone kept their eyes glued on the projection, cheering as Ajax managed to slay more monsters that tried to attack him.

The air thickened, and the boy tensed up.

Ajax turned around slowly, noticing a small blob in the distance, standing upon a mountain top. It was too far for him to make out any details besides from some blacks and glowing blues.

"Okay... It's just my imagination..." Ajax shook his head, peeking back at the blob.

Except that whatever the thing was, it seemed slightly larger than before, though Ajax couldn't tell if his mind was playing tricks on him and making him see things that didn't exist.

"Calm down, Ajax... you're just imagining things..." The boy took a deep breath, and peered back once more.

The figure had once again gotten slightly bigger.

"Okay, something is definitely there." The boy gulped in fear, "I better keep moving."

"Yeah... a very smart decision." Albedo nodded in his regular monotone voice, but everyone could tell that he was worried as well.

Luckily, aside from a bunch of Hilichurls that dotted the land, there wasn't anything else that gave Ajax too much trouble. The boy could see several wolf-like monsters, but Ajax veered away from them.

He didn't know what they were, but he was pretty damn sure he didn't take any lessons on how to kill weird skeleton dogs. He wasn't sure why they appeared in two different colours, but if they were anything like the slimes he had met back in Snezhnaya, then different colours probably meant different elements, or whatever equivalent this hellish place used, and Ajax wouldn't have the opportunity to figure that out before he was dead.

And that was the only monster Ajax came across that was in a Mitachurl's weight class.

The boy had seen deformed, disfigured creatures that roamed the land casually, as common as a wild boar or a finch in the warmer nations of Teyvat. Monsters armed with teeth larger than his entire house, with claws sharper than even the deadliest Cryo weaponry created by the Tsaritsa herself.

They could probably step on him, and not even notice his crushed corpse that would be reduced to bloody flesh stain on the ground of this cursed land with his bone splinters embedded directly into the cracks beneath his feet.

Ajax was lucky those creatures paid him no heed, of perhaps he was so insignificant compared to these gargantuan beasts that it wasn't even worth the effort.

The boy had picked up a crossbow dropped by a Hilichurl Shooter when he had killed it, and seeing as it was still in good condition, Ajax decided to bring it along.

That turned out to be a good move; after scaling a cliff to try and regain his bearings, the boy ended up running into a flock of winged Hilichurls that liked to hover just out of the reach of his sword.

The boy couldn't tell how much time he had spent trudging around aimlessly in this hellish underworld, but he could not find a safe place to hide and rest. His walking pace was slowing down, and even the easiest of fights was wearing him down, slowly and surely. Ajax didn't have any food, but his most immediate concern was the lack of water; it wouldn't be long before he collapsed from dehydration.

"If this really is the Abyss..." Gorou asked, his ears twitching nervously, "Would he even... be able to find supplies?"

The best place he had found was what he had assumed to be an abandoned nest of some monster, but before Ajax could even sit down, a hoard of Hilichurls, along with several Mitachurls had barged in, but the boy had managed to slip away in time to avoid the conflict.

But no matter how far Ajax ran, once he looked behind him, the black and blue figure would always be in the distance, slowly getting closer, inching its way towards Ajax. It was the only constant in this hellscape, and yet, a reminder that Ajax was so out of his depths that it was a miracle he wasn't dead from a stray Hilichurl Shooter arrow or something.

Suddenly, Ajax perked up as the sound of rushing water grew louder, and the Snezhnayan eagerly followed the sound to its source.

Eventually, the boy came across a winding river, but as thirsty as the boy was, he recoiled upon seeing the waterway.

A purplish fluid as thick as ink dotted with streaks of neon pink contrasting against the eerie violet, violently splashing against the banks, gurgling noisily like the stomach of a hungry beast. Miasmic vapour bubbled up from the river bed, and Ajax could make out some stray bones floating by in the rapids of the river.

"He... he can't possibly drink that... right?" Amber blanched.

"I don't think he has a choice." Eula closed her eyes, and crossed her arms, "Die from dehydration or potentially getting sick, but still being alive. I think the choice is obvious."

"I don't think you understand." Venti whispered, uncharacteristically quiet for the usually cheery bard, "This is the Abyss. It's not dirty like the drainage system on Narukami Island..."

Everyone looked at Venti in confused, as Yae sighed, lowering her eyes towards the ground.

"Just being exposed to the darkness is enough to corrupt even the strongest elemental beings and Youkai, let alone a mortal human child." Yae explained, completely deflated, "Their souls are tainted with the poison of the Abyss, eating away at their mind and body, until they are no different from common fiends, aside from their appearance. What do you think would happen if one were to consume that corruption directly from the source?"

"They'd be as good as dead..." Diluc murmured, his eyes softening slightly with pity.

Yae nodded, "There is nothing left but monsters wearing the face of the dead."

Tartaglia flinched violently at the words of the Guuji of the Grand Narukami Shrine, biting his lip to make sure that he didn't make a sound. He shared a glance with Zhongli, and the ex-Archon shuffled closer, gently putting an arm around the Harbinger's shoulder and squeezing comfortingly.

The boy backed away from the stream, breathing heavily.

"You know what you have to do, child."

Ajax froze up at the voice that sounded very much like his own, but at the same time it was nothing like him.

"Uh... what is that?" Chongyun tensed up nervously, "A spirit?"

"It can't be a spirit... right?" Xingqiu muttered, turning to his friend reassuringly, "What would a spirit be doing down there?"

"You want to live, don't you?"

"Who... who's there?" Ajax squeaked. He hated how weak his voice sounded; anyone would think that he was an easy picking.

The voice did not respond.

"Okay... I'm talking to myself... " Ajax chuckled nervously, weakly, "I am officially losing it... "

He shot a glance at the bubbling river, but before he could decide on his next course of action, a loud howl pierced through the air.

Zhongli's grip on Tartaglia's shoulder tightened, "Rifthounds..."

"It's okay,Xiansheng." The Harbinger shot the ex-Archon a shaky smile, "It's fine.I'mfine."

Xiao's sharp hearing caught onto those words, and he shot Tartaglia a questioning glance, but ultimately, chalked it up to the Fatui's recklessness and charging into a hoard of Rifthouds in the Spiral Abyss despite their corrosive ability being able to pass through shields.

Before he knew it, skeletal wolves with golden and purple manes appeared in a shower of sparks, razor sharp claws aimed directly at his throat.

Dropping his belongings, Ajax had barely been able to roll out of the way, but the damage was already done. The mere graze of a deadly claw, slicing through the fabric of his shirt, tearing into his arm and leaving the remnants of what felt like a deadly toxin racing through his body.

His body felt like it was corroding from the inside out, his insides turning to mush as the poison made its way through his veins.

Ajax watched helplessly as the larger Rifthound howled, and the smaller ones hovered around, eyeing him like he was a tasty snack as they waited for orders from their leader, the shattered remains of his crossbow lying on the ground as collateral damage from the initial ambush.

"I'd really like to be optimistic here." Beidou started, "But I really don't see how the boy can get out of his alive, even if he were at full strength. Not to mention he's down a long-range weapon."

"I'd like it if you didn't interrupt." Ningguang shook her head, "I don't think our interjections would be able to change anything."

Beidou snorted in faux amusem*nt, but ultimately decided to keep quiet.

Ajax raised his sword through labored breaths, and swung it against the closest Rifthound Whelp with all the strength his exhausted, failing body could muster.

The recoil from the attack seemed to hurt Ajax more than the small beast; it barelyflinched as the blade made contact with its head, but the boy yelped in pain as his blade bounced off, causing the boy to stumble.

"The gods don't care about you; they threw you away. The world isn't fair, child. We can save you, protect you from the misery of those tyrants. "

With a quick slash, the Whelp ripped its claws through his chest. Ajax let out a yelp of pain as he felt those serrated claws shearing through his skin like paper, marking his torso with deepgorges andtainting the purple ground with the crimson red blood of a human child.

The Rifthound Whelp raised its claws, ready to attack again, but a threatening growl from the larger Rifthound made it reconsider, and it drifted back to its pack.

Whimpering pitifully, sucking in desperate gasps of air, Ajax clutched his chest tightly, knowing that it was neither helping his situation with the corrosive poison, nor preventing him from bleeding out.

"What are your chances? Let us help you. That would be more than the gods have every done."

A voice at the back of his head purred, sounding so soothing, so calming, that Ajax felt could fall asleep right then and there.

But that would be a rest he would never wake from.

"The weak die, the strong live, isn't that right, Ajax?"

No.

It wasn't fair. He wasn't weak. He didn't survive this long, just to be torn to pieces by some random monsters. Ajax wanted to live up to his namesake. He would leave his mark on his world, even in the inky depths of the Abyss.

He refused to die, not like this.

I cannot die here.

An uncharacteristic burst of anger bubbled up from the pit of his very being, and Ajax gritted his teeth.

If these monsters thought that they could make dinner out of him, then they thought wrong.And if he was going to die anyways, then Ajax was going to make sure that these beasts would regret their decision to go after him.

I want to go home.

He couldn't tell if those were his own thoughts, or the miasma from the environment around was seeping into him from every pore on his body, corrupting him and bending his will to its whims, but at this point, the boy was past caring. Even if he was being delusional; anything that would help him survive, Ajax would claw his way past any obstacles and viciously leap at the chance to live another day.

I want to see my family again.

Ajax roared, ignoring the venom that was spreading through his body like a deadly parasite, ignoring the slashes in his chest like they were nothing but papercuts.

With sheer determination, he pushed himself to his feet, snatching his shortsword off the ground andbrandishing it like it were a legendary weapon of mass destruction, as if it hadn't just bounced off the Rifthound Whelp's hide like it were a child's toy just moments prior.

His hands were slippery with his own blood, but Ajax's grip on his sword tightened, the coppery fluid being soaked up by the leather wrapped around the hilt.

"You want me? Come and get me!" Ajax growled, life draining from his small body, yet his eyes were glinting with the resolve to slay down the monsters that were standing between him and his survival, monsters that were eroding the boundaries between life and death.

The larger Rifthound snarled, the smaller Whelps floated around it, all poised and ready to attack, their malicious, hungry glowing eyes trained on the boy.

His breath slowed.

Ajax felt like he was dying, no, he knew he was dying, the corrosive poison having probably reached his heart by now, with how fast it was beating.

If he was going to die, he was bringing everything down with him.

He exhaled.

With a monstrous roar, all the Rifthounds lunged at the lone boy, their eyes glinting venomously.

A desperate, bloodcurdling scream erupted from the boy's throat, the shortsword held tightly in his grasp glowing a brilliant shade of blue that contrasted sharply against the greys of the Abyss and the crimson red of his blood that was staining the floor.

Ajax swung his sword, his blade cleanly slicing through the vertebrae of the large Rifthound. He swore he could see the shock, the pure hatred in those beady glowing eyes before the purple glare faded away to nothingness.

The skull of the wolf clattered to the ground, evaporating into a whisp of dust, and headless skeletal body followed suit, until nothing left of the beast remained saved for broken claw.

A spoil of war.

The smaller Whelps were more agile, and managed to avoid the Hydro-infused blade, but Ajax snarled animalistically, and without missing a beat, he quickly turned on his heel, moving fluidly through the hoard of skeletal pups as though he were made of water, harshly running his blade into every single monster, reducing them into nothing but dust.

Panting, Ajax growled, eyeing his surroundings warily, as thoughanother pack of Rifthounds was just around the corner. His blade had stopped glowing, not that the boy had noticed it in the first place, but the air was more oppressive than usual.

It was painful, tiring to breath, and Ajax sucked in another lungful of corrupted air.

"A conduit of Hydro born from fervent ambition, all the way down here?"

Ajax snapped his head upwards, finally noticing the source of the crushing pressure that made him feel so inferior, so weak, so utterly useless.

An armored creature of malicious energy stood right behind him, towering over him. Ajax couldn't see any eyes on this being, except for a small blue gem lodged in the middle of its forehead. The gem on its chest pulsed ominously with sheer power, and the golden trim on the monster's robe-like hide made it look so eerily human, yet clearly not so.

"An Abyss Herald?!" Aether screeched anxiously, his mouth falling agape, as he clung onto Paimon tightly.

"Hey! Paimon can't breathe!" The fairy yelped, wiggling slightly to make the Traveller loosen his grip, "But on that note, HE JUST BARELY MANAGED TO GET PAST THE RIFTHOUNDS AND THIS HERALD JUST JUMPS HIM!? THAT'S NOT FAIR!"

"This is the Abyss we're talking about." Xiao seethed, "Nothing is fair."

"The Abyss Order is made up of cruel, sad*stic creatures who would stop at nothing to accomplish their goals." Diluc growled, "I'm not surprised one would kill a child simply because it's amusing."

"Except our dear friend Enjou, of course." Kaeya poked Diluc playfully, his eyes crinkling in a way that still indicated that he was stressed, but was doing his best to lighten the mood.

"Of course." Diluc rolled his eyes and gritted his teeth.

The Abyss Herald jumped down to inspect the boy more closely, snarling, "You truly are something... for the favor of the Heavens to be placed upon you, even in the depths that the gods themselves dare not stride."

Ajax could barely breath, and the shortsword slipped out of his hand, clattering to the ground noisily, but he couldn't pay any heed to his fallen weapon ; he had reached his limit long ago, and had been pushing himself way past it.

He was far too exhausted, the corrosion had spread too far, the world was spinning around him and making him so dizzy, he would throw up if his stomach wasn't empty for the lack of food, or even intact from the monstrous poison of the Rifthounds; he couldn't even tell if he was standing on solid ground.

He felt like he was falling, and the next thing he knew, he was staring at a blurry vision of what appeared to be the Abyss Herald's armored boots.

"Such a tragic fate for you, already written in the stars. The end is nigh for you, child, and your fate is sealed."

Ajax tried to push himself up, but it was a futile effort, as his vision finally turned black.

Chapter 9: Swallowed by the Darkness

Chapter Text

"Oh... archons..." Thoma's mouth opened and closed like a fish, as if he couldn't figure out what to say, "A Herald? How... why..."

Ayaka gently patted the housekeeper's shoulder comfortingly, as Ei gripped the armrest of her chair tightly.

"When did you two get so close?" Kaeya snickered, pointing at Zhongli and Tartaglia.

No one had noticed when it happened, but somehow, Qiqi had ended up on Zhongli's lap as he pressed up against the Harbinger's side, glaring at the crystal menacingly as he growled. The amber hues on his hair were glowing, while Tartaglia was doing his best to calm the raging funeral consultant.

"Hey, it's okay." The Harbinger murmured, "It's okay,Xiansheng."

Zhongli glared at Tartaglia as his rage slowly subsided, the glow of his eyes and his hair fading slowly, and Hutao sprang out of her seat on the couch, her arms outstretched, "Qiqi! Come sit with me!"

"Okay."

"Now, now, don't be like that... EH!?" Hutao paused, "Okay!? Just like that!? I thought you hated me!"

"Hutao is annoying. And warm." Qiqi bluntly stated with the hint of disgust in her flat voice, much to everyone's amusem*nt and Hutao's faux expression of disappointment, "But I don't think I can protect anyone here."

She hopped off Zhongli's lap, and patted Tartaglia's head gently, "I hope you feel better soon, Childe-gege."

The Harbinger made an odd noise of confusion, but otherwise made no move to disrupt thejiangshi, before Qiqi turned to Zhongli, "You'll take care of him, right, Zhongli-gege?"

The ex-Archon tilted his head, blinking, before nodding, "Yes...?"

Satisfied, the zombie walked over to where Hutao was sitting.

"Come on, enough procrastinating." Keqing's leg was bouncing impatiently, "We don't know how much more we have to watch... and if what Enjou said is true and there really is abyssal energy here..."

"Yeah yeah, we got it." Hutao grinned, helping Qiqi up onto the couch before hopping into her seat, and the room darkened once again.

When Ajax opened his eyes, the very first thing that he noticed was that he wasn't dead.

Blinking, the boy pushed himself up, rubbing his eyes blearily. His fleece undershirt was folded up, and the boy had apparently been using it as a pillow. He was lying on one of his thicker coats, and the other was draped over his body like a blanket.

"It's about time you've woken up."A familiar voice rang out,"You humans really do sleep a lot."

"I... what?" Ajax asked, looking at where the voice had come from, only to realize that it was the same Abyss Herald from before, tossing some bones into an eerie green fire.

The boy was about to screech, but he slapped his hand over his mouth just in time.

That was when he noticed the tightness of his chest, and upon looking down, he saw that his torso was bandaged up neatly.

"Another nice Abyss Herald... Lector... something?" Ganyu asked, surprised.

Albedo was busy jotting some notes down in his notebook.

Ajax was startled back to reality when something was tossed into his lap. Upon picking up the object, he realized it was a charred, overly roasted lavender melon, and the boy looked at the Abyss Herald in confusion.

"It fell from somewhere in Inazuma. Plenty of things fall from the surface."It replied, "You mortals have to eat to recover, don't you? How fragile."

She, not it. Now that his head didn't feel like cotton soaked in the blood of his innards, Ajax could tell that the voice of the Abyss Herald was of a higher pitch.

Ajax took a bite out of the lavender melon. It was absolutely disgusting, tasting like ash and smelling like the rotting, decaying flesh of some deceased creature, but he wasn't going to be picky at this point. It was dry and crunchy, completely devoid of any juices, and it just made his throat feel dry and scratchy and reminding him of just how thirsty he was.

He choked down the entire melon, shaking his head to try and forget the bad taste, before asking, "Is there... water? Or anything to drink?"

The Abyss Herald pointed towards the river that was right next to him, still filled with the same disgusting miasmic liquid.

The boy shuddered; he had no idea how he hadn't noticed it sooner, but now, he couldn't ignore the pungent smell entering his nostrils.

"Oh, Archons... I wish we could get him some fresh water." Amber shuddered.

"You... you were the one following me, right?" Ajax meekly asked, "How long... have I been down here?"

"I don't know. A week, give or take? Though the terminology that you are used to is a mortal construct that I haven't had to use in eons."The Herald shrugged.

"A week?!" Ajax exclaimed, "My parents would be worried sick!"

"If you mean up on the surface, they probably haven't noticed."She stated nonchalantly. Ajax blinked in confusion, but the Abyss Herald didn't offer up any explanation.

"But... why... why me?" Ajax asked, and the Herald visibly shrugged,"No idea. But it seems like you were merely the unfortunate victim of... what do you call it, "being at the wrong place at the wrong time"."

The boy was about to retort, before something else caught his attention.

A glowing blue gemstone with a silver, eye-shaped decorative trim with four spikes. It sat next to his make-shift undershirt pillow, and Ajax had no idea how he didn't notice it sooner.

"A... Vision?"

"How did he even get a Vision?" Beidou asked, "I mean, I know how he earned his Vision. Taking out those Rifthounds in that state? Good work right there. But if this is a place where even the Archons won't visit... if you would excuse my impertinence, Raiden Shogun..."

"I am still... surprised at that too." Ei admitted, "And there is no need for formalities here, Captain of the Crux. We are not currently in Inazuma, and you are all Aether's friends."

Sara looked a little conflicted, and Yae grinned, "Aww, you're finally opening up, Ei! I knew you'd grow up eventually."

"Miko..." Ei growled, her voice taking on a warning tone, but the Kitsune just snickered.

The gem pulsed, almost inviting him to touch it, and the small boy reached out to it, almost as if he were in a trance.

His finger brushed against the pristine, shiny surface, and the Vision started glowing. Ajax picked it up, inspecting it curiously, before he turned to the Abyss Herald.

"You got that while fending off the particular conduit allows you to manipulate Hydro, the most versatile out of all the elements."She explained, creating a Hydro blade directly out of her wrist as a demonstration,"The element with the ability to take any shape, to be solid or liquid, to heal or raze, the source of all life, and yet, that life can be so easily taken away."

Ajax stared at the Hydro blade in awe, before he paused, "If I can control Hydro... can I drink that instead?"

"Absolutely not! Water is nowhere near as potent as Hydro." Zhongli interrupted, staring directly at Tartaglia, "Have you not heard the tales of people using Hydro Slimes as an emergency water source? They brought them into dry deserts and dangerous domains, but instead of falling to traps or enemies, they perished from the overconsumption of high concentrations of Hydro. Direct ingestion of Hydro is akin to swallowing the most potent of poisons, and it is an understatement to say that they are merely harmful to the human body."

"We aren't here for a history lesson, old man!" Venti hastily blurted out, already noticing the suspicious glances everyone was shooting the Harbinger from Zhongli's lecture.

It was clear that from the previous day's speculation that everyone was pretty sure that Tartaglia was Ajax, though they all wanted to collect some solid evidence before accidently jumping to conclusions.

And Zhongli's outburst at Tartaglia for a rather reasonable question for a fourteen year old child to ask an Abyss Herald while trapped in a void of endless darkness made it clear that the similarities in appearance and homeland were not just a coincidence.

Zhongli glared at Venti, but Tartaglia just laughed and slung an arm over the ex-god's shoulder, "Don't worry,Xiansheng, you can continue lecturing me on the dangers of concentrated elemental energy later, okay? Or any other topic for that matter."

Zhongli's gaze softened, and he shot Tartaglia a small smile.

Venti coughed into his hand, muttering, "Whipped."

The Abyss Herald let out a noise that sounded like she was laughing, before replying,"Well, if you are looking for the fastest way to the grave, then sure. Pure elemental Hydro energy would definitely kill you way faster than that."

She nodded back at the purple river, and Ajax cringed.

"What would you do, child? Perish from dehydration, or live to see another day? It's your choice."

Ajax gritted his teeth, clenching his fists tightly.

"You want to live, don't you?"

The boy inched closer to the putrid river banks. He wanted to throw up, but Ajax steeled himself.

Keqing covered her mouth; she looked like she was about to throw up.

I want to see Mama and Papa, and all my siblings.

The young Snezhnayan thrust his hands into the rapids, letting the ink-like liquid flow through his fingers. The purple, pink and violet twisted around, forming demented faces that were laughing at him, almost mocking him for his timidness and cowardice.

As pale as Diluc usually was, right now, he looked as white as a clean sheet right after Adelinde had just run it through the wash and left it out to dry.

I want to see my family again.

The boy could feel some slime-like sludge passing through his fingers, and something that felt like small, rough pebbles, and somewhere at the back of his mind, his brain unhelpfully supplied that they were most likely decaying flesh and bone fragments floating around after some unfortunate creature died.

He put his hands together, scooping a handful of river water out, watching as the corrupted liquid sloshed in his cupped hands, slowly dripping through his fingers.

Even Yae, as thick-skinned as she normally was, had turned pale at this point.

I want to go home.

Tilting his head back, Ajax immediately brought his cupped hands to his mouth, letting the miasmic liquid trickle out of his hands and into his body. It was definitely thicker than water, and if he thought the mere appearance and smell of the liquid was disgusting, then tasting it was about a thousands times worse.

He thought he could taste death and blood, something akin to what he imagined the hottest chili pepper mutated into a demonic Pyro Regisvine would produce.

He choked on the liquid as his entire body was bombarded was sensations his pathetic human mind was unable to comprehend, tears leaking from his eyes as he collapsed, clawing at his throat as he retched violently, convulsions rippling through his body like a tidal wave.

Gorou whimpered like a scared puppy, his ears pressed against his head as his tail curled around him.

After what felt like an eternity of gagging on everything and nothing, Ajax managed to choke down the foul liquid. He took a ragged breath, and for the first time since falling, he thought that the acidic, corrupted air of the Abyss felt so refreshing.

The Abyss Herald cackled,"You actually did it. Impressive. No wonder a Hydro conduit was able to reach you, all the way here."

"Why..." Ajax wheezed as he sucked in a breath of air, still trying to clear his lungs, "Why are you... still here? Why are... you... helping me..."

"Why, you ask?"The Herald chuckled,"The answer is; you are simply amusing."

Tartaglia was in a daze as the memories popped up in his mind, as vivid and as terrifying as the day he had been down there, and he shook his head, trying to shoo them away before he succumbed to the darkness once again.

"Amusing!?" Zhongli growled, his anger bubbling over and threatening to overflow at this point, "He isn't your amusem*nt,fiend."

His grip on Tartaglia had tightened considerably, and while most people would be complaining that the god had a crushing, punishing grip, the pain grounded him, reminding him that there was still someone who treated him like he was a real person instead of a thing, someone who still cared about him for who he was, who embraced all his flaws instead of forcing Ajaxto be someone he wasn't supposed to be.

Ajax frowned, before bursting into another coughing fit, and the Abyss Herald continued,"You see, things do get very repetitive down here after hundreds of years. Kill, kill, more killing... many beings from your realm have fallen... but all of them barely last a minute before being killed, or losing themselves to the darkness. You are the first in a long time who have lasted so long, having embraced the corruption better than most. Or perhaps, you are too naive to know any better."

The boy let out a strangled noise of confusion, still trying to catch his breath, but the Herald paid him no heed,"An opportunity like this... it's quite hard to come by, wouldn't you say? After that splendid preliminary performance, it would be a shame if you were to leave so soon."

The Snezhnayan finally managed to take a proper breathe, and the same foreign feeling of anger bubbled up in his stomach, but Ajax couldn't tell if it was the liquid giving him a tummy ache. He snapped, "I'm not your plaything. I will get out of here, and-"

"It's not like the gods are any different. The Heavens were once so benevolent, but now they just watch in amusem*nt from their lofty thrones as chaos ravages through the land. They are no better than us."She hissed,"You claim you aren't a plaything of The Abyss, but you are nothing. History is written by the victors, and the victors are those who survive."

The Herald stood up, glowering down at Ajax,"Well then, boy. Amuse me. Show me you deserve to live, your desire to go home... if you'd even want to, at the end.Forthe Abyss has already left its mark, and it will not let go so easily."

Chapter 10: A lost soul

Chapter Text

The second the lights flickered back on, Aether hopped to his feet and stretched.

"You know... I think it's a good time to break for lunch. We can grab some food and try to digest everything that has happened."

"I'm sorry, Honorary Knight... but I don't think any of us can stomach anything after what we've just... watched..." Barbara was still covering her mouth as Jean tried to calm her down.

"While it does not seem like a good idea, this is the Abyss we are talking about." Albedo reasoned, "This is just the beginning... and it is better for us to take a break now, instead of later, where more important events are occurring and it would be inconvenient to interrupt the Ley Line memories."

Everyone still looked disturbed by the memory of the poor boy choking down Abyss water in order to survive, but they all agreed with Albedo.

Noelle, Thoma, and Kazuha hopped into the teapot to start making some food, and Tartaglia patted Zhongli on the back reassuringly before he followed suit.

"I'd like to start by saying that... while I do not trust the Abyss Order... I feel rather inclined to believe the Herald's statement when she mentioned the former benevolence of the gods." Diluc stated, "What were her exact words again?"

"She said"It's not like the gods are any different. The Heavens were once so benevolent, but now they just watch in amusem*nt from their lofty thrones as chaos ravages through the land. They are no better than us."Kaeya repeated, "There you go, Master Diluc."

Kokomi furrowed her brow, "If I may be so bold... but which gods in particular is this Herald referring to? The ones that were slain during the Archon War? The Seven Archons of the present?"

Ei and Venti all shared a look, while Yae just flicked between looking at them curiously.

"Should we tell them about Celestia?"Ei mentally asked.

"I am not sure. With whateverthe Tsaritsa is doing, it would be safer for them to know.Let them keep their ignorance to the truth..."Venti replied,"But then again... you know what happened to Sal Vindagnyr."

"Perhaps Morax would know."Ei offered.

They both hazarded a glance at Zhongli, but one look into his glowing amber eyes and piercing pupils made them recoil in fear.

Venti was a mere wind spirit when he started out, with no natural power of his own, and that combined with his refusal to directly govern his people, the difference in power between them was obvious. Meanwhile, while Ei had been born a god, she had only been the Archon for five hundred years, mostly letting Makoto make the administrative decisions in Inazuma before her passing.

She may be powerful, but neither her nor Venti wanted to cross an angry Morax.

"I think it's safer for our health if we leave him out of our discussion."Venti mentally squeaked,"I greatly value my human form."

"Agreed."The Electro Archon agreed.

"I do not believe the Herald is talking about the Seven Archons. Perhaps a higher power, but I don't think the Archons, or gods like Andrius or Osial are what the Abyss Order is really after." Aether shook his head, "I've tangled with them on several occasions, I think once they were trying to corrupt Andrius... they also did that with Dvalin too... and then..."

Aether paused, wondering if he should mention the Inverted Statue and give Barbara a meltdown, but decided against it, "It seems like they're trying to harness that corrupted power to take something else down."

"Oh yeah... didn't Dain mention this "Loom of Fate" thing?" Paimon offered.

"Who is this... "Dain"?" Xiao hissed, "I do not like the sound of a "Loom of Fate"... especially in the hands of the Abyss Order."

"It's... complicated..." Aether admitted, "But Dain is trustworthy. We have different views, but he also wants to take down the Abyss Order."

"Please excuse me." Zhongli suddenly stood up, walking towards the teapot and disappearing.

"Well... he's certainly angry." Sara commented, and Xingqiu nodded, shuddering, "Yeah... I've never seen Zhongli so... upset before. He's usually very composed, even in the most infuriating of scenarios. I've seen him facing a hoard of Ruin Guards and barely batting an eye."

"What is he?" Amber asked Hutao, "Liyue has many Adepti, right? Is Mr Zhongli one of them?"

"No idea. I do think that maybe he's a retired Adeptus who wants to experience mortal life or something... but he can have his secrets." The Director of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor shrugged, "He kind of just popped up one day in Liyue Harbor, looking for a job, but with no credentials, no one really wanted to hire him. It was clear that he is really knowledgeable in many fields, so when he came knocking on my door, I hired him on the spot."

"Hmmm..." Diluc frowned at Zhongli, and he shared a look with Kaeya that indicated that they would talk about this later.

"Back to the conversation at hand..." Ganyu replied, "While Lord Barbatos does not directly govern over Mondstadt, he does appear to aid his nation when his help is really needed. Likewise, after the Archon War, My Lord does not use force unless it is necessary. I am not too familiar with the nation of Inazuma, as it is not on the mainland, but the other nations original Archons have passed, leaving the position to younger gods. I do not think the Abyss Order would be as familiar with the newer gods as they would the original Archons, and would be unable to make such a statement."

"And clearly they feel justified in their actions." Chongyun muttered.

Eula leaned back, "They are hurting people who have done nothing wrong. They are not justified in anything."

"Perhaps. But think about it from their perspective. They believe the world has wronged them." Ayato mused, "If they need to take down gods to harness their power in order to fight this theoretical "higher power", then logically, they are currently not strong enough. If this "higher power" has dominion over the world of Teyvat, then a possible course of action would be to harass the current inhabitants as a form of revenge."

"Nii-san!" Ayaka berated, "You don't have to be so serious all the time."

"This concerns the safety of Teyvat, which includes the stability of Inazuma, and subsequently, the Yashiro Commission." Ayato sighed, "My apologies for overthinking."

"Is this really our first takeaway from this? Are none of us going to address the fact that the poor kid had to-" Xingqiu yelped when everyone glared at him, clearly aware of the issue but none of them being in the mood or the right state of mind to address it at the moment.

"I'll... keep quiet." Xingqiu squeaked.

Tartaglia paused in the Teyvat Fried Egg he was cooking when he felt a slight shift in the atmosphere of the Serenitea Pot. He's familiar enough with the realm, and with his finely honed senses, he could generally tell when someone has entered or exited Aether's little teapot dimension.

"What is it? Has something happened?" Noelle asked, cooking her signature pancakes.

Kazuha tilted his head upwards, "I can hear the shackles of anger of an ancient dragon-"

Tartaglia rolled his eyes, interrupting the samurai, "Do you ever say things that make sense instead of all that... flowery talk?"

The wandering samurai let out a small amused laugh from the Harbinger's comment as he kept a close eye on his Dry-Braised Salted Fish, as Thoma inspected his cooking, "That smells awesome! I didn't know you could cook so well!"

"The most easily obtainable food source when you're out at sea is, of course, fish." Kazuha stated, "And if your meal consists of a single fish, you should grill it to perfection, no?"

"Captain Beidou must love your cooking then." Thoma grinned, as Tartaglia looked out of the window.

There was only one angry dragon that he knew...

"Go take a break." Noelle offered, seeing how distracted Tartaglia was, "I will be on hand the whole time, in case the others need me. We are not short of help."

"Thanks, Ms Noelle. Oh yeah, could you make some Almond Tofu for Xiao? I left the recipe on the table." The Harbinger grinned at the Maid-Knight, before washing his hands, grabbing his gloves and rushing out of the house. He waved briefly at Tubby, before running to the Sub-Space Waypoint. Concentrating, he teleported to the Waypoint that was nearest to the training grounds that Aether had set up.

Immediately, he was met with an enraged roar, as Zhongli viciously decapitated a training dummy with his polearm. His horns were displayed prominently for anyone to see, peeking through his dark brown hair, as his tail thumped against the ground angrily.

The man was gripping the polearm so tightly he might just snap the weapon in half, but that did nothing to deter Tartaglia, and the Snezhnayan boldly walked right up to the ex-Archon.

"Zhongli."

The man didn't seem to react, but Tartaglia knew Zhongli well enough; from the way his shoulders relaxed ever so slightly, the ex-Archon was aware of his presence. Though it was much more obvious by how the long draconian tail tensed up, elegantly weaved between the partings of his waistcoat.

Zhongli made his polearm dissipate, "That should not have happened to you."

"You can't change the past,Xiansheng. What's happened has already happened." The Harbinger sighed, "I'm not hung up over it, neither should you be."

"Just because you are okay with it doesn't mean that it should have happened in the first place." Zhongli growled, "You shouldn't need to prove your strength in order to earn the right to survive, especially at that age."

"What about the Archon War?" Tartaglia countered, "Weren't you gods just kicking other gods' butts to earn the title of Archon?"

"In some ways, it was. Though even that was under extraordinary circ*mstances, and shouldn't be considered the norm. Especially not in this day and age." The dragon shook his head.

"Didn't the Raiden Shogun fight this snake god called Orobashi?" Tartaglia offered.

"Fights between gods are normal, and the fight between Baal and Orobashi wasn't over something as trivial as territory or power. It is of a scale comparable to the Archon War, being initiated by the Heavens; even if they wanted to thin down our numbers and did not offer the incentive of being an Archon, many weaker gods would still have participated in the battle out of fear." Zhongli sighed, "There is a reason why the losers of the Archon War fled to the Dark Sea instead of simply being subservient, or at the very least, on neutral terms with a reigning Archon."

"Look, Zhongli-xiansheng, I know you're just worried about me... I get it..." Tartaglia took a step closer, "But sometimes, you should really let bygones be bygones."

"You forget that I am a god, Childe. I have lost many friends for reasons far less worrisome than the Abyss." Zhongli rumbled forlornly, "If even gods can be brought down by means that pale in comparison to the Abyss... by all standards, you are mortal, Childe. I cannot afford to lose you too."

"Maybe I didn't forget that you're a god. Maybe you're just far more mortal than you think, Zhongli." The Harbinger faux mocked, dropping the honorific for once, smirking cheekily, "I might be fragile by your standards, but I'm no slouch! One day, you will see how I conquer the world, crushing the thrones of gods beneath my heel and beating down every single Abyssal monster I come across."

And for once, he was speaking as Ajax; not Childe, and definitely not Tartaglia.

Tartaglia was the Tsaritsa's most loyal Vanguard, her youngest, yet most volatile and battle-hungry Harbinger. Childe was a diplomat who preferred brawns to brains, but was a much friendlier person compared to Tartaglia.

Ajax, who had died and was also given new life by the depths, was the most dangerous of them all. Constantly haunted and terrorized by the past, having no other choice but to let his fears and anxiety fuel him, making him stronger and letting him tear down his enemies more efficiently.

A lost soul shattered by the Abyss, a soul that could never be put back together, for the broken shards had long been tainted and warped by the darkness. A soul scared by everything and nothing, afraid of the world and himself.

And Zhongli could tell; Tartaglia and Childe wanted to fight monsters to grow stronger, under the guise of being an unpredictable, battle-hungry warrior.

But the truth was that Ajax was fighting only because he was scared of the unknown, and the only way for him to truly live again was to conquer the world, for that meant that he was the strongest, and nothing could hurt him ever again.

Zhongli snorted, amused by his mortal's arrogance, yet understanding his reasons, the fluffy yellow tip of his tail sweeping the floor gently like Teyvat's most exquisite feather duster instead of trying to crack the ground in half, "And should you ever require my assistance, I shall be there to aid you."

"You better. I might actually kill you one day if I didn't know you were on my side." Tartaglia stuck his tongue out playfully, with no real malice in his voice, "And then, who would be left to fight me to the death when the world lies defeated at my feet?"

"Xiao, most likely." Zhongli joked, a small smile gracing his lips, "I certainly wouldn't want to kill you."

Tartaglia shot the ex-Archon a rare, genuine smile, before he reached out, gently gripping Zhongli's shoulders as he steered him towards Aether's house, "Come on, let's get back. I think they're done making lunch. Might want to lose the horns and the tail, though. Such a pity, they suit you so well."

Zhongli wrapped his tail around Tartaglia's legs, locking him in place as he weaved the appendage between them, sticking the fluffy golden strands in the Harbinger's face as he shifted in the younger man's grasp. He moved his tail aside like a fan, allowing his golden irises meeting dead cerulean orbs, "Since you appear to like them so much... perhaps we can stay like this a little longer."

Chapter 11: So You Never Lie Again

Chapter Text

After a quick lunch, with Xiao looking at Tartaglia in absolute confusion (he had questioned how they knew to make Almond Tofu, since Xiao himself had only mentioned it once and they were not Liyuen natives, and Noelle had redirected him to the Harbinger), they settled back down rather quickly.

Some of the food had been left untouched, with everyone having a poor appetite, but they decided to leave them as snacks for later.

Tartaglia activated the crystal before scrambling back to Zhongli's side, with everyone noticing just how closer the duo were, but no one commented; the Harbinger was already uncomfortable enough, having his memories shown to everyone.

Ajax gritted his teeth as he slashed away at the hilichurls.

He remembered getting lost in the market, and crying his eyes out until his sister found him. But Ajax couldn't afford to be so useless, not with his life on the line, so that was a completely illogical course of action.

However,this wasn't Morepesok; he couldn't just wait for someone to come and save him. But he also didn't have any idea where to go, so he just opted to follow the Abyss Herald, though she just seemed content with wandering around, following the river upstream.

The Abyss Herald seemed to be intentionally running into all sorts of enemies, from flying hilichurls to deformed, sludgy monsters, and Ajax was starting to wonder if following the Herald was such a good idea in the first place, being forced to slay creature after creature as the Abyss Herald watched in amusem*nt from her perch as he struggled from inexperience, various injuries, andfatigue, the light in his eyes slowly fading away as Abyssal energy pulsed through his being as he slashed away at his foes.

"You're doing great!" Noelle encouraged, "Keep it up!"

I want to be stronger.

"Of course you do. Who doesn't want to be strong?"

Butshewas the only thing that Ajax was certain wouldn't kill him... at least... until she had her fun and decided that toying around with the young Snezhnaya had lost its charm.

It couldn't end. Not like this.

Ajax could feel her looming behind him, looking at him with mirth as he was forced to take another water break.If he had to be the amusem*nt of some Abyssal creature in order to buy himself more time, then damn it, he'd play along.

"Good strategy." Ayato nodded.

His stomach churned as he swallowed another mouthful of Abyssal water, but he's had a who-knows-how-long of getting used to the Abyssal energy devastating his body. Days, nights, time passed by like a whirlwind, and it wasn't like the landscape or the sky changed much to give him a sense of time.

His body no longer felt like it was being ripped to shreds from the inside out, now thathe had gotten used to the corruption that were now flowing through his veins. Thedark currents that were once so hindering, sapping his energy, were now fueling him, healing his wounds, pushing Ajax further past his limits as he continued to soldieron, though his eyes never did shineas brightly as before, draining his life-blood and replacing it with something else entirely.

Xiao looked at Tartaglia with grudging respect. He'd refused to accept it, but the boy was exceptional if he was able to survive in the Abyss for such a long time, even with a curious Abyss Herald as a companion. Ingesting so much Abyssal energy would do no one any good, and yet, this mortal was somehow able to twist it to his bidding, controlling the darkness instead of letting it control him.

Ajax had always been a meek, timid boy. He never sought out battles, running at the slight shift in the environment towards his family. While he did want to get strong and make his family proud, Ajax had never once considered a life where he would be putting those skills to good use, hunting down monsters and slaying wild beasts not for survival, but for someone's amusem*nt.

He loved it.

He hated it.

"You should be happy to be alive, boy."

There was no such thing as happiness, not down here.

And every monster he fought, every time he killed, the light in his eyes slowly faded away, until his irises were as dark as the depths of the ocean.

Every death by his hands ate away at his humanity, gnawing away at hisconscience, but some part of him refused to give into the darkness fully.

I want to go home.

Darkness ripped throughout his entire being, as Ajax tightened his grip on his shortsword, taking a few seconds to infuse the blade with Hydro before he hacked off aMitachurl's head. He was still unused to his Vision, and while he did pick up some tricks from the Abyss Herald as she easily sliced through savage beasts like they were nothing but paper, he was having some trouble actually putting it into practice.

"Ehhhh I'm not surprised." Keqing winced, "Infusing a blade with an element is already hard enough. I understand with Electro or Cryo or Pyro... but with Hydro... I'm not even sure how he managed to do that in the first place..."

Chongyun, Noelle and the Kamisato Siblings all nodded absentmindedly, while Diluc crossed his arms and closed his eyes, thinking hard.

TheSnezhnayan gritted his teeth in frustration as his blade lost the infusion, nearly getting whacked by another Mitachurl while being distracted. He's been trying to keep his blade infused for longer periods of time, but he could barely get it to stick for more than a couple seconds before his blade lost its glow.

And each time he failed, his impatience and frustration grew, along with his fears.

He might be able to take out Mitachurls without using his Vision, but what if he ended up facing another hoard of Rifthounds? Or stronger creatures that he had yet to meet, monsters that the Herald was not steering him towards simply because she wouldn't think it would be amusing?

What if-

"Be patient, child."The Abyss Herald chided, being oddly gentle and understanding for such a menacing creature,"Forcing Hydro to bend to your will is as fruitless as trying to grow a tree from the bottom of the ocean."

She was met with annoyed snarl from a fourteen year old boy for interrupting his spiral train of thought.

"Ya know..." Paimon squeaked, being oddly quiet, "Paimon thinks... maybe don't raise your voice at the nice Abyss Herald that isn't trying to kill you?"

"Do not blame him. The Abyss..." Ei shook her head, "It really does bring the worst out of a person. It sensed the ambition in your heart and uses it to latch onto you, clawing its way deeper and deeper into your heart, until it gouges your entire soul out."

Tartaglia slumped down dejectedly at the statement, but Zhongli wiggled slightly closer to him in an attempt to comfort him.

It didn't really work, but Tartaglia appreciated the effort.

Any other time, Ajax would have wondered where he got the courage from, but right now, he was bubbling with vexation from his repeated failures.

If he had done it once, logically, he should be able to do it again, but he wasn't able to do it, and he just couldn't find a reason for his failure.

He wanted to live.

He needed to live.

He needed to go home, and he couldn't do that if he was dead.

"The strong live and the weak die. Isn't that right?"

It was right, that strange voice talking in his head. The darkness that was filling his brain, permeating every part of his body, leeching into him like a parasite and never letting go.

He wasn't strong enough, he was never going to be good enough.

And it wasn't like he didn't have the resources. The Abyssal river was giving him back his strength, now that he was used to it, and Ajax could feel himself getting stronger and stronger by the minute.

(Corrupted,the voice hissed in his head,just like all the other sinners.)

But not fast enough.He was never going to be safe, not down here, not at the rate his was improving.He wasn't growing strong enough. He needed to get stronger faster, to grow faster.And since he was copying tricks directly off the Abyss Herald... so logically, he should go and askher.

"Teach me to fight."

"Did I hear that right?" Diluc looked constipated, his usual frustrated expression twisted by utter confusion.

"Well.. she's nice enough to not kill him on sight." Kaeya reasoned, "I guess it's worth a shot."

The Abyss Herald couldn't visibly blink, but the creature blinked,"Pardon?"

Ajax could remember his mother and older sister haggling in the market, trying to save as much Mora as possible in case of an emergency.

I want to go home.

"You want this to be fun, right?" Ajax boldly challenged, "I think it's pretty boring just killing Hilichurls and normal monsters, but obviously if I'm not strong enough, the more interesting fights will kill me. So teach me. I get stronger until I find a way to go home, you get to keep your "amusem*nt" around longer. Win-win scenario for the both of us."

"Bold move." Kaeya nodded, "But it just could work."

"Reminds me of Liyue and their fixation on contracts."She snorted, her voice taking on an oddly gleeful and predatory tone in anticipation,"But this is interesting. Very well, I accept your proposal, but training is going to be by my terms, not yours."

The young Snezhnayan stared up at her defiantly, and just as the Abyss Herald thought he would chicken out and rescind his offer, the boy... stuck his clenched hand in her face, with only his pinky sticking out.

"What... are you doing?"She asked, confused.

I will make it home.

"You make a pinkie promise, you keep it all your life. You break a pinkie promise, I throw you on the ice. The cold will kill the pinkie that once betrayed your friend, the frost will freeze your tongue off so you never lie again." Ajax rattled off the nursery rhyme resolutely, before wiggling his finger, "So? Pinky promise?"

"Ah, that nursery rhyme brings back so many delightful memories."

Aether couldn't help but remember what Tartaglia had told him, after he had run himself into the ground, desperately trying to protect his younger brother's childish innocence.

Trying to protect the innocence that was brutally ripped away from him before he had even begun to live.

He couldn't help but feel sorry for Tartaglia, even though he knew that the Harbinger would most likely NOT appreciate the pity and would demand another fight which would result in another whooping of the Snezhnayan's butt.

Or perhaps, that was just Tartaglia's way of coping, of controlling the fights all around him, because anything that happens, that's on him; he wins by his own hand, he loses by his own hand, but through it all, he's always in control everything.

So that nothing could hurt him; because nothing could surprise him if he was expecting it.

"How childish. There is no such this as an "oath" down here, not in this realm ofbroken promises and empty words."The Abyss Herald huffed, before she attempted to copy Ajax's movement,"But this is amusing in its own right. Very well;I will teach you how to wreak havoc down in these devouring depths, and perhaps, you will learn to embrace the beauty of the darkness."

With a determined growl, Ajax curled his pinky around the Abyss Herald's much larger one. His hand was barely the length of her armored fingers, and the young boy had barely managed to get his pinky halfway around the Herald's own pinky, but the deal was sealed.

His blood was boiling, and he felt like the Abyss Herald was smirking at him, even if he couldn't see her expression."

"Very well, then, boy. Where do we begin?"

Chapter 12: Never Ending, Never Changing

Chapter Text

The lights briefly flickered back on, allowing the Vision Bearers to shuffle around and stretch their legs briefly, before settling back down.

Hu Tao was uncharacteristically quiet, her mind jumbled up in confusion. Part of her duty as a funeral director was to preserve the world's balance of yin and yang, performing any person's last rites, to calm their souls, to quell their anger, to allow them to leave the world of the living in peace.

But in the Abyss, there was no "passing on", there was no "afterlife", she couldn't tell what was alive and what was dead and what was just a pile of sludge animated by the pure hatred and corruption of the vile environment.

She wasn't a stranger to death... and yet, the Abyss was completely uncharted territory for her, because nothing was truly alive, and nothing was truly dead. They were all just shells of their former selves, twisted by the darkness into something unrecognizable.

Qiqi looked up at her in concern, but Hu Tao just slapped her annoying smirk back onto her face, "Aiya, don't worry about me, Qiqi! You should be more worried about yourself, after all, I'm going to bury you!"

She got a slap on the arm by the youngjiangshi.

"You already know the basics." The Abyss Herald snarled, casually flicking another wave of Hydro at Ajax. Despite it being a relatively weak attack, from the hands of a seasoned warrior, it felt like a tidal wave was crashing into him as Ajax tried, and failed to infuse his blade with sufficient Hydro to counter the attack,"Feel for it, guide it, and Hydro will bend to your whims, but never attempt to control it."

Ajax gritted his teeth as he stood up, shaking off the water from the last attack. She was right, he knew what to do; instead of trying to infuse his entire blade, she had suggested starting small, just with the tip of his blade.

Once he had figured out how to infuse the tip of his shortsword with Hydro, he slowly extended his power, working to infuse the sharp end of his blade with energy, before moving on to the entire blade.

He knew what to do, and how to do it. He just needed to practice, to commit it to muscle memory, to make it so natural to him so that he could literally infuse his blade with Hydro in his sleep.

Make it such a permanent part of himself so it would be something he could never lose.

What if I lose my weapon? What if I don't even have a weapon in the first place? What if-

His brain started going into overdrive with scenario after scenario of "what if"s, and he didn't even notice the Abyss Herald charging up another Hydro attack.

He was met face-first with a tsunami of water.

"Concentrate."She berated,"You could be killed by a mere Hilichurl with how distracted you are."

Ajax shook himself out of his stupor.

One thing at a time, Ajax. Master one thing before moving onto the next. Being crappy at everything isn't going to save his life.

"Take it slow." Barbara nodded, "Rushing isn't going to help."

He had to be good, he had to be the best at everything. That was the only way to survive. And being the best at everything started by being the best at something.

"While I do understand his reasoning..." Chongyun winced, "Isn't that super strenuous?"

Venti shook his head, "Not really. If Ch... if Ajax wants to survive in the Abyss... that really is his only option. And even then, his chances of survival are... low..."

Ajax readied himself, feeling the Hydro energy all around him, slowly gathering them and mentally pushing then together on the sharp end of his blade, allowing the Hydro energy to ripple down his shortsword like a waterfall.

I want to go home.

I will go home.

His Vision glowed alongside his ambition, and as the Herald sent another casual wave of Hydro towards him, Ajax growled, easily using his glowing blue blade to slice the Hydro wave apart.

The Abyss Herald straightened her posture, and clenched her armored hand, a Hydro blade extending from her wrist, "Very well, boy. Let's continue."

Ajax felt something else rippling under his skin, something different, something that wasn't entirely him, but he ignored the feeling, and steadied himself, holding out his sword resolutely.

"Are you... okay?" Zhongli quietly whispered, turning to Tartaglia. The Harbinger sighed, crossing his arms silently.

"If you need to take a break... we can call for one." Zhongli continued, "Don't push yourself too hard, Childe. This isn't something to be taken lightly."

"No... just... keep going." Tartaglia hissed, wrapping his arms around himself, "I... I'll be fine... this isn't the worst part anyways..."

It wasn't very visible on Zhongli's face, but the Harbinger knew from the way the god's eyes widened ever so slightly, that the ex-Archon was shocked by his statement.

But it was nothing but the truth. The training in the Abyss, the monsters that nearly consumed his mind and body, the darkness that seeped into him, tainting the very core of his being... Ajax's death and rebirth was nowhere near as painful as...that...

"Very well." Zhongli finally stated, gently gripping onto the younger man's arm, "However, should you ever need a break... please, do not hesitate."

Tartaglia slowly reached up, placing his hand on top of Zhongli's. He locked eyes with irises that glowed like the purest of Cor Lapis, and nodded.

The Abyss Herald's methods of teaching were... odd at best, deranged at the worst. It had basically boiled down to the Herald showing him some fighting techniques, giving a brief explanation, then smacking the boy around with her powers until he got the hang of it.

Though in all honesty, that was probably the only way Ajax managed to learn so quickly. Faced with an opponent who could wield Hydro like it was an extension of her own body, the young Snezhnayan had no other choice but to adapt.

And adapt he did. It wasn't long before Ajax could form a Hydro blade out of thin air, a perfect mimic of the gradually rusting shortsword the boy had with him through his entire journey into the Abyss, having infused his blade with Hydro energy so many times, killing so many monsters with it that the sword was practically an extension of himself.

And yet, along with it, came the consequences. Slaying monster after monster, slaughtering beast after beast, his hands were permanently soaked in the corrupted blood of the creatures he killed, seeping into his skin and stuck under his fingernails.

No amount of trying to use his Hydro Vision could ever cleanse his hands of the miasmic poison, and washing his hands in the Abyssal river served nothing more than a reminder that if he did not keep himself in check, it wouldn't be long before the corruption ate away at his humanity, a parasite of darkness clawing into his heart, shredding his soul to bits and reducing him to nothing more than the living corpse of Ajax.

"The mental strain must be severe." Ganyu murmured, "Ajax is doing a really good job so far."

"He is..." Yae just crossed her arms, eyeing Tartaglia warily, "But it's not going to last."

The Harbinger just so happened to catch the Kitsune's gaze, and he flinched, shrinking down on himself.

She knew.

He knew the Youkai and Adepti could probably sense the corrupted energy emanating from his broken soul... as for the humans... well... Diluc and Kaeya were perceptive, and the other Vision bearers weren't dumb either. If the similarities in their appearance and hometown didn't give it away immediately, one look at how dead Ajax's eyes were once he had managed to claw his way out of the Abyss would seal the deal.

It was only going to be a matter of time before everyone knew who Ajax was.

It was only going to be a matter of time before everyone abandoned Ajax again. After all, who wanted a monster in their lives? Who wanted an embodiment of the Abyss itself, a soul shattered over and over again, never to be fixed ever again?

Tartaglia was a weapon, Childe was a facade, and Ajax... well, Ajax was dead.

His family only cared for Tartaglia; the only reason they weren't starving to death after his father's wind chills got too severe for him to go out fishing, and subsequently, selling those fish, every single day. His older siblings had jobs, yes, but none of them were as high-paying as being a Harbinger, and in the chilly region of Snezhnaya, saving for a rainy day was the norm, or in their case, an avalanche or a severe snowstorm that swept through their towns for days at a time, carrying nothing but destruction in their wake.

His Majesty didn't need Ajax, she needed Tartaglia as her spear, and Childe, for public relations. The other Harbingers didn't even like him, wanting him sent on missions far away from his homeland just so they could keep him out of their skin.

Every acquaintance he's made in Liyue, they've only known Childe, only Tartaglia if they had a debt that had to be collected, and never Ajax.

He just needed Tartaglia, just needed Childe.

That was the only way he would be wanted, the only way people would care about him.

After all, no one wanted Ajax. He didn't need Ajax.

Tartaglia thoughts would spiral further, if it weren't for a firm grip on his arm by Zhongli, bringing him back to reality. Zhongli shook him gently, his eyes shining like pure, molten gold in the darkness of the room.

"Are you okay?"His eyes said,pleaded, and Tartaglia shrunk down even further, unable to bring himself to look back at Zhongli's pure, unadulterated look of worry, of concern forhim, a corrupted monster of the Abyss.

That was all Zhongli needed for the ex-Archon to pull Tartaglia in close, before turning his gaze towards Yae Miko. He glared at her, venom burning in his eyes, and he bared his fangs at her in a warning, gripping onto Tartaglia protectively.

Watch your words and tread carefully, little Kitsune.

Yae flinched at the unsaid warning, and Ei just shot her a mildly smug look, mentally smirking at her familiar's predicament, but also somewhat confused atMorax'sprotectiveness of a mortal tainted by the Abyss. An exceptional mortal, all things considered, but still, one that was filled with so much darkness and corruption.

The only thing keeping him going was the memories of his parents, of his family, of his hometown.

His hands trembled.

Unwrapping a narwhale plushie on his birthday, a rare luxury after a particularly bountiful, profitable year of selling fish.

His blood boiled.

Memories of fishing, the giddiness of catching a humongous fish, the warmth of flames as they huddled around the fireplace, trapped indoors by a raging snowstorm.

He felt like he was being choked, tremors running through his body like an earthquake.

Wrapping his arms around Tonia and Anthon as they piled together on a mattress, trying to keep warm amidst the howling winds outside, bundled in blankets as they sprawled out on a mismatch of old, patched-up pillows.

Pain rippled throughout his entire being, and he nearly fell into the vile, disgusting river if he didn't steady himself.

The adventures of the hero Ajax weren't the only things his father had told him. Over the years, there had also been tales about a legendary man called Theseus.

Not just Snezhnayan scholars, but scholars from all over Teyvat have debated over the Theseus' paradox, something that should be a very simple question:

"If the ship of Theseus were kept in a harbor and every part on the ship were replaced one at a time, would it then be a new ship?"

With nothing to occupy his thoughts but his deformed reflection in the miasmic river, where even the eyes of his reflection didn't shine, Ajax couldn't help but wonder.

"Mora for your thoughts?"

Ajax looked up at the Abyss Herald, with a completely dead look in his eyes, trying to hide just how badly he was shaking. Despite not having any eyes, the Herald looked down at him with pity... and sadness.

"Don't try to fight it. " She stated, " The corruption has taken root, nestled deep within your heart, and your fate has been sealed. Rejecting the darkness will serve no purpose other than harming yourself."

Ajax frowned, and growled, "What are you trying to say?"

" The fight against corruption is a fight that even the strongest of gods can't hope to win, let alone a mortal. The power of the depths is ancient, even when time first began to flow, never ending, never changing. You can't escape, boy, and even on the off chance that you do, you'll never be the same; you'd be unrecognizable. Don't try to fight it. Let it win. "

The Snezhnayan shot to his feet, and snarled, "You may be my Master, but you don't tell me what I can and can't do. I will get out of here. I will get home. I will be with my family again."

She whispered,"You may be with your family, but your family will never be with you ever again."

Chapter 13: A senseless journey with no end

Chapter Text

Tartaglia tightened his grip on himself. Ever since he had gotten out of the Abyss,herwords had always haunted him.

Because she had been right. He might still be using Ajax's physical body, but the soul of an innocent boy had long been lost to the devouring depths. He had gotten to see his family.

But his family never saw Ajax ever again. Because Ajax had died in the Abyss.

Zhongli didn't need to be a god to tell that every single being in the room, immortal or not, was shaken to the very core by the Abyss Herald's words; most of all Tartaglia himself. The thought of losing oneself, giving in to the darkness... it had seemed like such an abstract concept, when Yae had first mentioned it.

Then, they saw the effects of the corruption firsthand, the immense strain on a young child's mind as he tried to hold himself together, to push forward, desperately trying his best to go home and see his family again.

Or perhaps, it was only because the boy had been so young, that he had managed to survive and adapt.

After all, adults were too rigid in their way of thinking. There was a saying "You can't teach an old dog new tricks", and it was an accurate saying at that. Adults were too set in their habits, too stubborn, and when something as dark and as ancient as the Abyss started messing with their minds, they are completely unable to adapt, to comprehend what was going on, and they shatter like ice, like a brittle rock.

Maybe that was why Tartaglia had survived, and even managed to thrive in the Abyss, his young mind being much more susceptible to instantaneous changes, his child-like mentality being much more malleable than that of a fully grown human.

He was as fluid as the element he controlled, being able to adapt to any situation so quickly it would give anyone whiplash, even being able to adapt to somewhere as corrupted as the Abyss.

Zhongli was considering calling for a break, to give Tartaglia some time to calm down, but the Harbinger seemed to want to power through it for the time being, glancing over at the ex-god and shaking his head.

Very well, the ex-god would respect his friend's wishes... but if things got too bad... he wouldn't hesitate to take action.

Ajax followed behind the Abyss Herald as she trudged over some mountains, stepping over the cracks on the ground, as they made their way... somewhere. He had already killed most of the monsters in the area, save for the larger, more savage beasts, but neither he nor the Herald wanted to bother those creatures yet.

He wasn't weak by any means, not after all his lessons and training, but even his and the Herald's combined power were nothing compared to those monsters. Their claws were as huge as mountains, and they could swat them away like they were nothing but annoying fleas. One of the most ancient creatures in the Abyss, who could be considered manifestations of the Abyss by just how much of their essence consisted of pure, corrupted darkness.

"Oh... Archons..." Keqing gasped in fear. Liyue had managed to win against Osial and Beisht, but these creatures... they could probably stomp the entirety of Liyue Harbor flat with one foot.

Ningguang seemed to share her sentiments; with how prevalent the Abyss Order was being, it didn't seem too out of the question to think that they could somehow teleport these gigantic beasts onto the mainland. Even if they didn't have any control over the beasts, their sheer size and corrupted nature would no doubt through the entirety of Teyvat into chaos.

The youngSnezhnayacould feel the energy radiating off these beasts; it felt so similar to the ground that he was currently walking over.

I will make it home.

The pain was something that Ajax would never get used to.

His memories were supposed to be his only comfort in this realm of nothingness, and yet, every time he tried to pull up a memory to keep his hopes up, to remember the kind, innocent boy as he slaughtered another vile beast, his entire body trembled.

His skin felt like it was on fire, his limbs felt cold and stiff, his head pounded like he had an entire avalanche dropped down on him, and his blood squirmed and wriggled uncomfortably in his veins, as if it had turned into insects that wanted nothing more than to burst out of his pathetic, weak human body.

There's no such thing as happiness down here.

Ajax had no choice but to push his once happy memories aside, if he didn't want to be a sitting duck for a mere Hilichurl Shooter to snipe him from half a mile away. His memories were hindering his ability to fight, were destroying his body from the inside out, were killing him before he killed himself.

Jean gaped like a goldfish, as she clutched her sister tightly, praying to Barbatos (yes she knew Venti was like... literally lounging on a couch with Xiao, Aether and Paimon), thankful that she hadn't been unfortunate enough to take a trip to the Abyss.

Barbara had always been a constant in her life, even after their parents' divorce, even if they never really grew up together, even if they were only able to really interact after the idol's fans got so intense that even kind, sweet Barbara had to ask the Knights to help her on occasion (which was mostly Kaeya chasing that damned Albert away, the Calvary Captain adored Barbara even if he was snarky as always, or even Rosaria or Diluc if either of them happened to be nearby. They would always relay the news of the situation to the Acting Grand Master, whereafter she would set some time aside to check on her little sister).

She loved her darling little sister, and part of the reason she worked so hard was to keep Mondstadt safe, to keep her sister safe, not needing to worry about the monsters lurking outside Mondstadt's walls; she was glad that Barbara had friends like Aether to convinced her that just because she was the deaconess of the Church of Favonius, didn't mean that she shouldn't be able to live her own life. Friends like Kaeya and Diluc and Rosaria who would protect her from the monsters that Jean couldn't handle.

She couldn't ever imagine a world where just thinking, where caring about Barbara would hurt her, would bring her so much pain that she had to throw aside her love just to function properly.

The Abyss Herald shot him an unreadable look, before settling down,"That's enough. We'll stop here."

Ajax let out a confused noise, but he was grateful for the break; his legs felt like the rotten sludge in the Abyssal River he had touched while trying to take a drink, and he didn't know how much longer he could keep standing up.

"Most creatures dare not traverse here. Not even my kind." She continued to look around warily,"A brief respite shall do."

The boy collapsed on the ground, breathing in the miasmic air heavily, resting his back against a boulder as he shuddered, clutching desperately at his arms. His nails were digging into his flesh, drawing pinpricks of blood, but Ajax couldn't bring himself to care; this wasn't pain inflicted by the Abyss, his was pain that he was inflicting on himself.

A different kind of pain, pain that grounded him, that allowed him to clear his head.

"Do not think. Do not remember. There is no semblance of reason or logic here."She stated,"Memories of a past life can only hurt you."

Ajax took in a pained, shaky breath, "Sounds like you have tons of experience in that department."

He had a feeling the Abyss Herald would be rolling her eyes at his snarky comment... if she even had eyes in the first place.

"Do not take matters like this lightly, child. You do not truly understand the gravity of your situation."She chastised,"I have had millennia to ponder over my circ*mstances,and I have spent centuries wondering why we have been dealt this hand. I have yet to come to a conclusive answer."

Ei hissed under her breath. She had absolutely no love for Khaenri'ans, not before the Cataclysm, and especially not after she lost her beloved sister Makoto, along with Saiguu and Chiyo.

"A flourishing civilization, built purely by humans. An underground realm, too dark for most natural fauna, and yet, even without the aid of the gods, we flourished; it was the pride of mankind, proof that humans were strong enough to thrive on our own. And yet... "

She sighed, placing some bones together in a neat pile,"I do wish for some vengeance against the Heavens who condemned us to this undeserved fate; all of us do. However, regardless of what has happened... I do not think it is fair for innocents to be caught up in these so-called "sins" of the others. Our Highness wishes for the revival of the homeland, but at the cost of so many others... perhaps, some things should be left as they are."

Ajax let out a confused noise, as the Abyss Herald tossed in some wood from a nearby dead tree, before setting her hand alight with green flames and lighting up their little campfire.

"Wait... isn't she a wielder of Hydro?" Ayaka asked, frowning in confusion, "How is she able to..."

"Hmm... interesting..." Ayato mused.

Ajax stared at the green flames, then at the Abyss Herald, then back towards the flames.

"How..."

"This?"The Abyss Herald flexed her armored fingers,"The Irminsul roots found here are far more ancient than their surface-world counterparts. They exude overwhelming elemental energy, and any being fully tainted by the darkness would have access to these elemental abilities. A blessing, and simultaneously, a curse."

She tossed more bones into the fire,"It's too late to turn back, boy. You've done well to last this long, but attempting to return is just a senseless journey with no end. You will spend the rest of your days chasing a meaningless dream of a life with no reward. Reminiscing about memories, about your former self will bring nothing but pain."

"I'm still me." Ajax weakly stated, as if even he wasn't convinced by his own words; as if he could already tell he was different, but he was just chalking the differences up due to having to adapt to a different, far more violent environment.

"Maybe you are. Maybe you aren't. The Abyss sees all, takes all, consumes all."She replied,"It's nestled deep into your heart, and it will continue to eat away at you until the end of your days. The only reason you haven't faltered just yet is because it has a far more abundant energy source in our Abyssal surroundings. Perhaps your Vision is also playing a part in it, protecting you for now. But once you leave..."

She didn't finish her statement.

Hu Tao wrapped her arms around Qiqi, and surprisingly, the zombie let her, without any complaints about Hu Tao's naturally high body temperature from being a Pyro user.

Maybe it's because she sensed just how dire the situation was, with how the room temperature seemed to have fallen by several degrees.

"How... horrible..." Amber covered her mouth, looking like she was just about to cry, as Eula attempted to comfort her.

She turned her attention back to Ajax,"Do you still wish to go back, knowing nothing awaits but a tragic, painful end?"

Ajax scowled, "I don't care. I will see my family again. I need to..."

The boy paused, and frowned, trying to stop himself from showing any weakness, and the ground rumbled.

The Herald stood up, looking around warily,"That's enough. We have stopped long enough."

"What's out there?" Diluc scowled, instinctively reaching for his claymore; anything that could scare a dangerous creature like an Abyss Herald was definitely something to be wary of.

"Ehe, I uh... don't think it's something you can handle, Master Diluc..." Venti offered, shuddering in his seat. He had faced the shadow dragon Durin alongside Dvalin, but the poor, gentle-hearted dragon seemed unaware of his actions and just wanted to befriend the Dragon of the East, not harboring any hatred towards either of his killers and only wished that they had met under better circ*mstances.

But Durin was an artificial creation, a pale imitation, and he was nothing compared to the true horrors that could be found in the depths Abyss.

The entire rumbled, stronger than before, and Ajax immediately shot to his feet despite the pain shooting throughout his entire body.

Survive first, deal with the pain later.

"Come on. I should have known the conduit from above would rouse them. " The Abyss Herald urged, lunging forward as she cursed in an ancient, foreign tongue under her breath, andAjax raced after her, easily leaping over cracks and crevices like a deer, somehow keeping pace with the abyssal creature. The ground kept shaking, making it hard to keep his footing, but the youngSnezhnayan managed, somehow, having tripped over a rock only once but he caught himself in time.

"He's definitely been trained well." Albedo muttered under his breath, making hasty, messy notes of a realm he was unlikely to ever be able to visit.

The boy narrowly avoided being whacked in the face by a tree branch, as the ground rose up beneath him, faster than any naturally moving landmass, throwing him off balance and sending him up into the air, past a large, shiny, beady black gem that looked way too intelligent to just be a generic rock.

Ajax may have improved his skills, but if there was one thing Ajax could never change, it was that he was biologically a human; no matter how hard he trained, how agile, how fast he was, humans were never meant to fly, and he would always be restrained by a completely useless skillset when the entire ground was the enemy.

Sara winced; being a tengu, she was one of the fastest soldiers in the Tenryou Commission, despite her broken wings. But she had always lamented losing her ability to fly; either for reconnaissance purposes or having an aerial advantage in combat, she preferred having the option to take to the skies.

The Abyss Herald was floating in midair, and Ajax twisted his body, looking downwards and waiting for gravity to drag him back down so he gauge the timing of his roll to lessen the impact of his fall.

That was a mistake; faster than Ajax could react, the ground split open like the jaws of a beast.

Oh, that's because it was the jaws of a giant monster,the boy realized all too late, as he fell, unable to grab onto anything as he watched the Abyss Herald floating away, hovering above him with her Abyssal powers as she watched him plummet, unable to do anything lest she be swallowed alongside him.

Kazuha's eyes widened at the sight, as Xingqiu shrieked and clung onto Chongyun.

Tartaglia bit onto his lip, drawing blood, as he tried to forget the pain that clung to his very being, pain that never went away, no matter how much of Dottore's "medicine" he consumed (the safe ones, at the very least, the Tsaritsa had made it very clear that medicine made to reduce pain should NOT inflict more pain).

He stared at the gigantic eyes of the beast, black miasmic saliva dripping between its jagged teeth like corrupted waterfalls, chills running down his spine as the boy shot downwards, straight into a tunnel of darkness.

Chapter 14: Eye of the Storm

Chapter Text

Ei crossed her arms, a slight frown on her face. So far, all the evidence was pointing towards Ajax being the Eleventh Harbinger, the youngest of the Tsaritsa's prized children. But the boy had been consumed by the Abyss... and there was no way he could survive.

Not after that...

Chiyo's usually gentle eyes glowing a deep crimson, like that of the blood she spilled with her blade. A once kind Oni, now rampaging like a demon. The tender, outstretched hands that were unable to even crush a bug, now rampaging through Inazuma, slicing down soldiers mercilessly in her wake.

Musou Isshin in her hand, Ei had no other choice, and she constantly had to tell herself that this wasn't Chiyo, and she was never coming back, even as the beast of sin that wore the face of her dead friend fled, leaving an amputated arm and a lone horn behind.

The Electro Archon shook herself out of her stupor.Especiallynot after that.

Perhaps this had really been a huge misunderstanding; maybe Tartaglia really wasn't Ajax.

"Are you alright?" Zhongli quietly asked, and Tartaglia winced.

"Yeah..." He muttered weakly, "Yeah... I'm fine..."

He was pretty sure Xingqiu would be screeching about a "cliffhanger" of some sorts if Chongyun wasn't covering his mouth.

Jean was hugging Barbara protectively, and this was news to him; but while Tartaglia would most likely report this to Dottore (the man was the one in charge of Mondstadt after Signora's untimely demise), Ajax vehemently refused to let Jean's younger sister get involved in their "diplomatic relations", AKA blackmail attempts against the Acting Grand Master.

Tartaglia brought his hand up to cover his face, desperately trying to remember what had happened. If he could remember... if he could recall what had happened... it would be easier to deal with if he knew what he was dealing with.

His mind was a blank, his Vision and Delusion both glowing in response to his agitation. The Harbinger growled, and ripped his Delusion off where it was usually pinned on his scarf. He had half a mind to throw it across the room in frustration, but he had no intention of breaking what was supposed to be a badge of honor by the Tsaritsa, and anything manufactured personally by Dottore would take more than a minor temper tantrum to completely destroy.

But now, it felt like a tumor, a parasite, just like the Abyss, eating away at his mind, consuming his lifespan.

"It's alright, Childe." Zhongli murmured softly, gently reaching out to grasp his hand that was clutching desperately at his Delusion, initially recoiling, but eventually, the ex-god placed his hand over Tartaglia's.

It was akin to falling into the Abyss all over again. Thepurplish sky combined with the blood-red clouds looked like an angry bruise as Ajax plummeted downwards, and the sharp, gaping maws of the beast shut, trapping him in eternal darkness.

The boy continued to fall,ricocheting about in the monster's throat as the creature continued to move, but in the darkness, Ajax had no real way of bracing himself for the impact. All he could do was to rely on his instincts, but even that was useless compared to the sheer intensity of the Abyssal energy around him, smotheringhim, suffocating him like a thick layer of snow.

It didn't take long for Ajax to finally hit the bottom, making contact with a disgusting, pulsating surface that wasdefinitely way too warm for his liking. TheSnezhnayan did his best to stand up on the uneven surface, his snow-boots allowing him to retain some semblance of traction against the rough, slimy, and most importantly,alivesurface.

His Vision was glowing faintly, but the blue glow did nothing to light up his surroundings that seemed to be made ofcondensed darkness.

It was too dark for anyone to see anything, and the projection was barely illuminating the room they were in.

He clawed at his surroundings desperately, unable to tell which was up or down; the only thing he was sure of was that if he didn't get out soon, he would die here, in the pits of this godless land.

He didn't survive this long in this treacherous land just to be food for some vile creature.

I don't want to die.

Ajax focused, using his Vision to create a pair of razor sharp Hydro daggers that could rivel the beautiful yet deadly Cryo icicles that hung off Zapolyarny Palace. He slashed at the walls that were pulsing all around him, but he seemed to do nothing but irritate the corrupted beast.

I can't die here.

He could hear the beast gurgling, before his entire surroundings shifted around. He slipped, his Hydro weapons disappearing as he tried to break his fall. He hit the ground, and suddenly, his entire arm felt like it was on fire, burning his skin off and scalding the delicate flesh beneath.

No, it wasn't fire. A cid.

"No! He can't... It can't be..." Kokomi gasped, and Gorou tried to hide the trembling of his tail and ears as he attempted to comfort the Divine Priestess of Watatsumi Island.

Ajax hastily retracted his injured arm, as the roaring sound of a waterfall grew louder, echoing off the stomach walls of the beast. Liquid started pouring into the chamber, and while Ajax couldn't see anything in the darkness, he could tell that his time was running out.

He couldn't let it end like this. He refused to let it end like this.

I want to go home.

His heart throbbed, and the air around him seemed to thicken, reacting to his fervent ambition. His Vision started glowing, but it did nothing to illuminate the absolute emptiness of the belly of the beast.

Ajax wanted to scream, to cry, as he felt the cavern filling up, the acidic liquid seeping past his pants and chewing away at his ankles.

"Is there... anything he can do?" Barbara asked hopefully, as the more mature adults looked at each other, intrigued and confused and horrified all at the same time.

But there was nothing he could do, Ajax desperately created more Hydro weapons to slice his way out, to no avail. He tried to control the stomach acid around, but it did absolutely nothing, and Ajax could only stand there helplessly at the acid levels rose around him, gnawing away at his knees, then his stomach, then his shoulders, his entire body screaming in pain as the miasmic acid burned away at his skin, infecting him even further as the darkness made contact with his exposed flesh.

He wanted to be safe.

He wanted to go home.

And in order to do so, he needed to be strong, he had to be able to crush the entire world beneath his feet, he needed to be the strongest being out there, so nothing else could ever destroy him.

A hunger awaked deep within him, a hunger that would never be sated, a monster gnawing at him from the inside out, as he choked on pure, condensed darkness, the acid now reaching his throat, threatening to drown him in the most painful way possible, burning his body away from the inside out until nothing, not even bones, remained.

"It's too late." Ei shook her head resolutely, "My condolences."

Everyone seemed to share her sentiments, and Tartaglia wanted scream, wanted to cry that he was not dead, that he was still clearly there, still alive, but there was that part at the back of his head that just whispered that they were right, that Ajax had died in the Abyss.

And Tartaglia had been reborn from Ajax's dead, mangled corpse.

I want to see my family again.

His Vision started glowing intensely, lighting up the stomach acid with an eerie green glow. His blood roared in his ears,as his body contorted grotesquely , tearing himself apart from the inside out.

"What... what's going on..." Amber squeaked, as Eula shuffled closer to her, intent on protecting her companion from harm, even if what they were seeing was nothing but an illusion.

His bones cracked, splitting apart, letting his corrupted bone marrow flow out from between the seams. His muscles distended like a balloon as he bulked up, the acid rippling around him to account for his larger form. His spine extended, sparks running through his entire body, as his nails sharpened.

His blood seeped out from his wounds, hardening upon exiting his body, and Ajax let out a bloodcurdling,gut-wrenching scream as he felt some kind of dark, foreign power swirling within him, churning in the depths of his very being.

Everything became so...loud.

Ajax couldn't hear his own thoughts, could barely feel anything except for the pain that blossomed through his entire being, like his body was nothing but a huge, gigantic bruise. His head was pounding, like an entire avalanche had fallen on him, and simultaneously felt like exploding.

Voices screamed in his head, in a language so old, Ajax couldn't make sense of it. He couldn't make sense of anything at all, not when his body was cracking apart and being put back together like a horribly deformed jigsaw puzzle.

Besides from Xiao, Zhongli, Ei, Venti, and Yae, none of the others could understand what was being said, but all of them instinctually flinched, their skins crawling as everything echoed around in a cacophony of nothingness.

Hearing the voices of dead gods, of fallen beings, not only feeling the full force of the damned, but also those that have been fully tainted by the depths, so full of darkness and hatred... and that was without even understanding what was being said.

Ajax let out another scream of pain, his razor sharp claws acting on their own, and tearing into the fleshy walls of the stomach lining like they were nothing but paper.

The creature screeched in pain, sound waves reverberatingdown its throat, but Ajax couldn't hear it, couldn't hear anything but the roaring in his ears, the darkness spewing nonsensical ancient tales of old, tightening its grasp around his heart, still pounding, still pushing blood through his arteries, still very muchalive.

The claws digging into his heart tightened, slowly, excruciatingly, painfully, squeezing it so heart that Ajax feared it would explode from sheer pressure.

His body moved on its own, his arms moving, clawing, digging forwards, hacking through corroded flesh and bone like a ruin hunter, slicing through bloody, corrupted entrails like old, dusty cobwebs. The tips of his claws glowed an eerie shade of purple, the metallic armor that now adorned his body, protecting his vulnerable, squishy,pathetichuman body, sparking erratically.

He didn't know what he was doing, or where he was going, his vision was obscured by corrupted bloody tendrils that clung to his body, attempting to wrench him away from the monster's more sensitive innards.

Ajax was barely deterred, and merely slice through them with his claws. His arms tingled with power, and Ajax had no other choice but to let the power flow forth, lest he explodes. He clawed forwards, a strangled scream escaping from his raw, strained throat, until finally, with one final, brutal slash, his vision was flooded with light.

Completely spent, Ajax weakly crawled out of the crevice he had carved for himself, emerging like a butterfly from a chrysalis, a caterpillar having grown up and transformed, because there was no other way to survive in this world without maturing, for being a innocent child just meant they were being nothing but burdens to everyone and themselves.

Because it was their fate, written in the stars long ago.

Themonster that emerged was almost twice Ajax's size, covered in armor, sticky and bloodyentrails of the beast dripping of his form. His Vision lay forgottenon the ground, covered in miasmic, corrupted liquid. A feathery collar adorned his neck, and shiny, crystalline structures protruded from his back, as Electro sparked from his clawed hands, decorated with freshly spilled blood.

A mask covered the entirety of his face, and in the middle of it, embedded a gleaming gem, swirling with violet lightning and cerulean waves.

Zhongli didn't have to be a god to tell that everyone would be mentally scarred by the events that had occurred, most of all Tartaglia, having to relive everything all over again. He wrapped his arms around the Harbinger, who had his hands pressed against his forehead, shaking like a leaf in the wind.

"Such inferior creations of Celestia.But yet, so very... interesting... "A new voice whispered at the back of his mind, in the same, ancient language, but for some reason, Ajax now understood what was being said.

"You hate the gods too, don't you? For abandoning here, for leaving you here to die."

He was met with the Abyss Herald, still hovering in the air, looking at him with what seemed to be complete and utter surprise. She floated downwards, peering down at him curiously, condescendingly.

"You curse the Heavens as well, for weaving such a tragic fate for you."

The claws on his heart tightened, and Ajax let out an animalistic snarl, reaching out, gripping onto the Abyss Herald's neck at breakneck speed, his claws digging into her metallic armor that seemed to dent under his grasp.

"You can have it all. After all..."

The Abyss Herald hissed, grasping his arm and snapping it in an instance, rendering his arm useless.

But Ajax felt nothing, could feel nothing, after all, his body had literally been torn apart from the inside out, what was a broken limb to him? Not when the power flowing through his body felt so...

Addicting.

"You shall ever be the eye of the storm."

Another tug at his heart, and Ajax lunged forward, giving into the power, Electro crackling in his other hand, aimed directly at the Abyss Herald, but she dodged his clumsy attack and flipping him over her shoulder, smashing him into the ground, before easily swinging him around and smashing his form against the body of the still-alive beast that Ajax had mauled his way out of.

"And the clashing of steel shall ever accompany you."

Ajax screamed, but his voice came out distorted, blood as black as squid ink spilled from his lips behind his mask, dripping to the ground. He used his good arm, digging his claws into the flesh of the monster, ignoring its screeches of pain as he hauled himself to his feet.

"The pitch-black memory of stepping into uttermost darkness."

The grip around his heart tightened, and blood gurgled up from the back of his throat, as Ajax dragged his beaten, battered body forwards, towards the Abyss Herald, who just stood there, silently awaiting him.

"Shall, at last, become the strength by which you will overturn this world."

Ajax's hands crackled with energy, and his Vision glowed to life, a Hydro shortsword forming in his hands. A vicious roar rang out, as Ajax let Electro flow through his hands and into his Hydro construct, coming as naturally to him as merely breathing.

He raised his Electro-Charged weapon, but the Abyss Herald lunged forward, easily shattering his weapon with a well-aimed flick of Hydro. F aster than he could even blink, she had him pinned to the ground, one hand nearly strangling him as an armored boot shoved him into the ground, digging into the small of his back despite the armor.

Ajax hissed and struggled, thrashing wildly, but the Herald grabbed his head and smashed it into the ground so hard, he couldn't see anything but stars.

"Look! Look! брат!" Tonia squealed, pointing towards the sky, "The sky is so clear! We can see the stars! Anthon, come here!"

"That's really nice!" Ajax peered up at the sky, squinting, a stack of firewood in his hands.

"I read in a book that some astrologists can see your fate once they know what your constellation is!" Tonia grinned.

Ajax whimpered helplessly, as he felt the Abyss Herald stilled in her actions, as if considering smashing his face into the ground again.

"Control your power." His father advised, adjusting his grip on his sword, "If you overextend, you'd throw yourself off balance, and leave yourself open to attacks."

Cracks started forming on his mask, the rest of his armor starting to peel apart, ripping off his body.

"Ajax!" His mother smiled at him from the doorway, "Dinner is almost done! Please, help get Tonia and Anthon ready!"

"Okay, Mama!" Ajax grinned, rushing into the bedroom to fetch his two younger siblings who were playing on the floor, helping them clean up their toys and ushering them into the dining room before they bolted when they realize that vegetables had, once again, been cooked.

Ajax stilled, desperately trying to cling onto any form of comfort to keep himself sane, ignoring the pain that seared through his entire being. The gem on his mask shattered, his mask cracked apart fully, his armorclattering to the ground,disappearing into Abyssal smoke.

His form shrunk, until there was nothing left but Ajax, his body covered in corrupted blood that was his and not his, his eyes the shade of NoctilucousJade with a hint of purple, but so dead, so devoid of life, so dark, like the darkness of the devouring depths that he had succumbed to.

Chapter 15: Don't leave me alone

Chapter Text

Qiqi bolted out of Hu Tao's grasp, and the Director of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor let her; it was clear that Qiqi was greatly bothered by everything, even if the young zombie had no idea what was really going on. She ran towards Tartaglia, wrapping her arms around him, finding comfort in the presence of a familiar brother-figure.

"You're hurting..." Qiqi murmured, clinging onto him like her life depended on it.

"Shhh... It's okay, Qiqi..." Tartaglia pushed aside his own worries, hugging her back, gently reassuring her, "I'm alright."

Tartaglia looked up, only to notice that everyone's gazes were on him.

He wasn't surprised that at this point; everyone knew what kind of monster he was. His fight with Aether in the Golden House had produced a huge surge of elemental energy, causing the Ley Lines to act abnormally, preserving the memory of their fight and resulting in a Trounce Blossom that had to be purified and revitalized. They couldn't tear down the Golden House, now that it was housing a Trounce Blossom, and Ningguang herself had stationed Millelith guards around the area to prevent people from just wandering in and activating the Ley Lines.

Aether usually purified the Trounce Blossom on his own, but if he was feeling particularly lazy that week (not that anyone blamed him, some people took him for granted and everyone was happy to help Aether out whenever he needed help) he usually grabbed a few friends to help him out. Tartaglia himself was often snatched from his work to defeat himself, and not only did Kaeya find that ridiculously hilarious, he utterly enjoyed watching the Harbinger beat himself up, regardless if the memory won or the real Tartaglia won.

Tartaglia thoroughly enjoyed the fights against his past self; being able to beat his Delusion and Foul Legacy while only using his Vision? Just a reminder that he was constantly getting stronger, improving, and Tartaglia relished in that feeling.

For remaining stagnant only meant more opportunities for his past to catch up to him, only meant that he didn't deserve to live.

"I think it's time we talked, Tartaglia..." Keqing narrowed her gaze, "Or rather, should I call you Ajax?"

He internally bristled at the statement.

"Don't ever call me that." Tartaglia snapped, though he barely looked threatening at all, shaking in his seat as the zombie and the consultant of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor quietly comforted him.

"You did try to drown our harbor. I don't really care how you feel." The Yuheng of the Liyue Qixing growled, but Ganyu put a hand on her shoulder, "Please, Keqing, calm down."

Keqing didn't want to stand down, but she trusted Ganyu, and it seems like the Adeptus had some sort of understanding that she wasn't privy to.

"We are here because the Abyss Lector wanted us to see something." Ei crossed her arms, glancing at Tartaglia, "Perhaps we're supposed to find out he's a monster that should be killed immediately."

A victim of the Abyss, a corrupted monster like Chiyo.

And yet, the Harbinger was still here, snuggled with her fellow Archon Morax, still alive and well, without even a hint of the madness and savageness that she had seen on Chiyo's face as she sliced her down.

It wasn't fair.

How could a mortal survive while her friends...

Even after so long, their deaths still hurt, and the Harbinger's existence was like a slap in the face to her, a constant reminder of a lifetime that could have happened, a lifetime that wouldn't happen.

Tartaglia clearly flinched at her words; normally, the Harbinger would be ecstatic that a god wanted to pick a fight with him. Even before he knew Zhongli was Rex Lapis, he had been pestering the man for a fight and had been denied countless times.

But now, faced with the potential wrath of the Goddess of Eternity, Tartaglia wanted nothing more than to run away and cry. He didn't want to remember this, he didn't want to remember anything, and now, not only was he being forced to relive everything, everyone was able to see what had happened to him.

If he fought a god, he wanted it to be because the god thought he was a threat. Because Tartaglia, the Eleventh of the Fatui Harbingers, was a fearsome opponent who destroyed all his mortal adversaries, and the god had no other choice but to fight him personally to quench his thirst for blood.

Not because of this.

Not because he was a weakling who got swallowed and tainted by the Abyss, he didn't want to die simply because he was yet another monster of the devouring depths.

He gripped onto Zhongli's arm tightly, trying to ground himself before he lost himself to his thoughts, trying to forget all theothertimes he had been called amonster.

Everyone froze in place, as the entire room turned cold. It was hard to breathe, like the air around them had turned as dense as a rock. Everyone turned to the source of the paralyzing pressure, only to be met with eyes of the purest of Cor Lapis, flaring with rage like a volcano ready to erupt.

Zhongli's gaze was fixed on the Goddess of Eternity, still seated with a firm arm around Tartaglia, baring hisfangs, the tips of his hair glowing like the purest of molten Mora.

"You may be a god, and are allowed to speak your mind freely about your whims and fancies in your homeland." Zhongli growled, his eyes glowing even brighter with power, "But I advice you to hold onto your comments, lest I slice your tongue out and sever your head directly from your spine."

"Zhong...li...?" Hutao squeaked, having never seen the calmest man in Liyue, heck, probably even the entirety of Teyvat, act so aggressive. Not when they were out picking specific flowers for a customer's funeral and they had happened upon a hoard of adult Geovishaps, not when some swindler was trying to advertise some fake relics and their faux history, not even when she drew a mustache on him with a brush when the man had, on the rare occasions, fallen asleep at his desk during his lunch breaks.

Zhongli ignored her, holding his gaze with Ei, barely noticing the fact that Yae was snickering at the drama and that Sara had gotten up from her seat, taking out her bow to aim an Electro-infused arrow at the former Archon, "How dare you threaten the Almighty Shogun!?"

Sara growled. She understood that maybe the gods weren't omnipotent, and maybe didn't make the best of decisions at times. The Vision Hunt Decree and the Sakoku Decree were good examples, hindering Inazuma's economy and plunging the entire nation into a sense of fear and dread.

That wasn't to say that the Almighty Shogun made a mistake; she had merely chosen the course of action that would have the most immediate effects, and the Traveler merely showed her the consequence of her actions from a different perspective, and in light of that knowledge, the goddess had chose to pursue Eternity through different route.

This just showed that she was a kind, considerate goddess, and when shown that there were issues she wasn't aware of, she would rectify her actions as soon as she could.

Just as Sara knew she was, being granted an Electro Vision while on the brink of death, her broken wings soaking in the rain and weighing her down as she fled her mountain home, as monsters pursuing the young tengu, as she was knocked off a cliff to fall to her demise...

Xiao and Ganyu had pulled out their weapons, instantly backing Zhongli up, as the others tried to make sense of just what the ever loving f*ck was going on. The half-qilin had already charged up a Frostflake Arrow, while Xiao looked ready to slap his mask on his face and start stabbing everyone with Anemo.

They may not be fond of the Harbinger, but Zhongli had made it clear that Tartaglia shouldn't be blamed for that event. Other than that, they really didn't have any other personal qualms with regards to the mortal, other than the fact he was a Fatui Harbinger, and personally, they have never seen their Lord so... carefree, so happy, so content.

Rex Lapis might be a god, but he had devoted the past two thousand years of his life to guiding and protecting Liyue Harbour. If anyone deserved to retire and live the rest of his life in peace, it was him. And if the Harbinger was able to give him that happiness, then so be it.

Venti popped up between the two hostile parties, "Can you guys... ya know... settle down? We can talk things through."

"Stay out of this, Barbatos." Ei growled, "This is between he and I."

"Wait, Barbatos? Like... Lord Barbatos? " Barbara faintly squeaked, looking at Venti in awe, horror and shock, as Jean, Kaeya and Diluc tried to comfort her.

The Goddess of Eternity reached up, her hand poised to pull Musou Isshin out of her chest, but Zhongli refused to back down, summoning his Vortex Vanquisher to his hands, looking ready to slaughter Ei despite Tartaglia clinging onto his arm like he were his lifeline.

At this point, most of the Liyue natives (save for Ningguang and Beidou) all sided with Zhongli, even if they weren't particularly close to the elder, trusting the ex-Archon's knowledge and expertise, as well as the two Adepti, even if Tartaglia was a Harbinger. The Kamisato trio, Kokomi and Gorou hung back, though they look liked they would back Ei if a fight ever broke out, while Yae was still as relaxed as usual, her eyes sparkling as she came up with new book plots.

Most of the Mondstadt natives were still trying to calm Barbara down, and Eula glanced at the brewing argument between the two nations, before sending a questioning look at Jean.

The Acting Grand Master shook her head. Mondstadt couldn't afford to get into a fight with either of the nations, and while she very much felt sorry for the Harbinger, who let the darkness consume him simply for the chance to go home, she couldn't risk the safety of her nation over something like this.

Diluc sent Jean a pointed look; he might feel bad for the Harbinger falling into the Abyss and suffering, but he knew how dangerous Tartaglia was. But he understood Jean's sentiments and concerns, so he also hung back.

Meanwhile, Albedo looked way more interested in the crystal than the brewing fight.

Kazuha observed Tartaglia closely. While it was true that not only was he a monster twisted by the pit, he was also a Harbinger of the Cryo Archon, allowed to run wild and do as he wish. He had seen the damage the man was capable of doing to the Abyss Herald, when he wasn't even in control of himself, and it was obvious he was a danger to everyone around him, not only with the full backing of the Fatui forces, as well as a Delusion.

However... for some reason, he didn't get the feeling that Tartaglia was inherently evil. He had a feeling that while the Hydro user may be a Harbinger, one of the most coveted positions of the Fatui, he was still suffering internally.

Aether, always the hero, put himself between the two angry gods, "Come on, guys, let's not fight here... Ei, please, Childe's not a monster, really."

It was only out of respect for Aether and what he had done for their nations that the two gods backed down, with the God of Contracts sending another growl in Ei's direction before turning his attention back to Tartaglia, but the damage had already been done.

Ei's words had resonated with him, and the Harbinger couldn't even call him out for it, because it was nothing but the truth.

Because Ajax had died in the Abyss and had been reborn as a terrible, hideous monster that had nearly killed his master, the only being in the Abyss who would probably entertain the whims of a teenager who just wanted to go home.

"Sorry to interrupt..." Albedo's monotone voice rang out, "But I believe the crystals needs time to recharge again."

"Ahh... that's perfect..." Aether plastered a smile on his face, "And this seems to be a suitable time for dinner."

"After watching the Harbinger getting eaten by an Abyssal monster and cutting his way out of its stomach?" Diluc raised an eyebrow.

"Brother!" Kaeya groaned, just as Jean turned towards the redhead while still hugging her sister, a horrified expression on her face, "Master Diluc!"

"What?" Diluc crossed his arms, "I'm just saying, I don't think anyone is in the mood to eat anything."

"You could have still said that better, your wording has no fetter..." Venti sweatdropped, "Alas, the day is gone and the crystal has no shine, there are no other options than to dine."

"Venti's right. We still need to eat and take a break." Aether shrugged, remembering the time within the realm created by the Fantastic Compass, not being hungry or thirsty but suffering mentally, "We can continue this tomorrow..."

There were immediate volunteers for cooking, wanting some kind of escape from the tension, as Zhongli gently nudged Tartaglia. The Harbinger shook himself out of his thoughts, and took a sharp breath, "I'm fine... I'm fine..."

"You're clearly not." Surprisingly, it was Xiao who spoke up.

Tartaglia frowned, but didn't respond.

"Hey, Zhongli, you're close to Childe, right?" Paimon tilted her head, "Why don't you take care of him? Childe looks like he's taking it really rough."

"I... I don't need people to take care of me..." Tartaglia immediately shot to his feet, "This is nothing. I'm strong enough to handle this on my own."

He didn't need them to know that heliterallyhad no recollection of this at all.

"No one said anything about "not being strong enough"." Aether deadpanned, "Seriously, it's tough enough watching this. But having lived through it once, already knowing how it's going to end, and then having to see it happen all again? I pity you, Childe."

Tartaglia gritted his teeth, but Zhongli stood up, calmly brushing himself off, "You are correct, Paimon."

The god grabbed the Harbinger by the arm, "Come, you can cook me that dish you were going on and on about."

"Xiansheng, that dish is made from crabs and octopi. You hate seafood."

Zhongli visibly cringed, tightening his grip on Tartaglia's arm as he shuddered violently, choking on his words as he forced them out, "Ah... if it would make you feel better, that is... uh... still...acceptable..."

All the Liyue natives, including Xiao and Ganyu, jaws dropped. Zhongli's hatred for seafood, especially octopi and squid and other tentacled creatures, was a well-known fact in Liyue, which limited the types of food he was willing to eat, and the man refused to even use chopsticks that have been "contaminated by foul, underwater beasts".

The one time Hu Tao practically forced him to eat prawns, Zhongli had literally spent half the meal chopping the prawns up into small, mushy, indistinguishable pieces, drowning them in a ridiculous amount of soy sauce, as if it were some kind of soup, before being even remotely willing to consume it.

And said man had literally just said he would eat a seafood dish just to make Tartaglia feel better.

"You are so whipped." Paimon exclaimed.

"We do not have whips here." Zhongli chastised, finally being able to calm himself down talking about something other than seafood, before dragging the confused Harbinger into the teapot.

Chapter 16: Never wanna be so cold

Chapter Text

Back in the privacy of the teapot, at least, before the others decided what to cook for dinner, Zhongli was seated by the table as the Harbinger looked for ingredients.

"We abandoned Qiqi." Tartaglia murmured.

"I'm sure she will understand. And Aether will take care of her. You need to worry about yourself." Zhongli replied, "These... projections... haven't been kind to you either. We're all worried about you."

"Worried?" Tartaglia snorted, "Didn't the Raiden Shogun just threaten to off me with her sword like she did to Musoujin Gorge?"

"She can try. I won't let her. While I understand her hatred towards monsters of the Abyss, as the Cataclysm had brought not just Inazuma, but the whole of Teyvat much grief, I will not tolerate her disrespect towards you." Zhongli growled, "You have survived a place where gods dare not tread, where immortals are reduced to nothing but shadows of their former selves, succumbing to their rage and suffering. Mortals have been driven to insanity by just being exposed to a fraction of the Abyss' power. Even with the aid of an... oddly friendly Abyss Herald, the fact that you managed to survive, even if it's by picking up some...abilities... is testament to just how extraordinary you are."

Tartaglia turned red, and promptly changed the topic, removing his gloves and grabbing an octopus out of an ice box, "Were you... actually serious about eating this? I could always cook something without seafood for you. Though... uh... I am the best at seafood dishes..."

The octopus, still very much alive, tried to wriggle out of his grasp, its tentacles wrapping around his wrist and arms, latching on firmly with its suckers.

Zhongli cringed at the memory of slimy tentacles squirming in his hands, still alive and producing disgusting, viscous fluids when being sliced off, the terrible smell of the ocean menaces permeating his nostrils. If he dwelt on his memories for too long, he just might want to throw up.

Maybe they were all just running away from their pasts, in their own ways.

"I am." Zhongli nodded resolutely, though Tartaglia could still see him visibly cringing away from the octopus in his hands, "My word is my bond, a contract as solid as stone."

"Very well then." Tartaglia grinned, taking up the challenge, "I'll make such a good dish, you'll never hate seafood ever again!"

Zhongli rested his elbow on the table, leaning on his hand as he smirked at the Harbinger, "I'd like to see you try."

Using the same cup as before to draw names, it was decided that Kaeya, Kokomi, Beidou, Hutao, Diluc, Ningguang, Sara, Albedo, and Hutao were the ones who would be staying in the teapot for the night, and some had already teleported into the Serenitea Pot to either cook, or take a shower and clean their clothes.

Aether just sighed as he ate his Sweet Madame, and prayed to the three Archons present that Tubby wouldn't get mad at him if someone burnt the house down by accident (Venti, Zhongli and Ei gave him weird looks, though Ei looked rather amused and Venti seemed more concerned about Barbara's meltdown).

"But the Holy Lyre!"

"Barbara, that wasn't your fault." Venti tried to explain to her, "We broke it while trying to stop Dvalin. Well, technically, I was playing it when an Abyss Mage smashed it."

"Hey... Aether..." Diluc had a Chicken-Mushroom Skewer in his hands, refusing to take Kaeya's alcoholic version of the dish, "I have... a couple of questions."

"Oh, sure. Ask away." Aether replied, as Barbara continued to ramble on, "And I've seen you singing in the plaza, and I even came to talk to you! I've shown such disrespect towards you, Lord Barbatos, despite being the deaconess of the Church of Favonius!"

"Barbara, it's alright..." Jean tried to calm her down, to no avail.

"You know my stance regarding the Fatui. And you've known what they've done..." Diluc glanced at Venti, who was trying to explain to Barbara that it was his intention to blend in with the citizens of Mondstadt, "You know what Signora did to him. And Tartaglia... well... frankly speaking, I do think thatattempting to drown an entire cityis far worse than just assaulting our resident Archon. Why do you still... trust him?"

"Look... Master Diluc... it's complicated." Aether sighed, "But... well... Childe's not a bad person. I don't even think he wants to be in the Fatui, if he could help it."

The red-head raised an eyebrow in surprise, his eyes flicking over to the Harbinger in question, who was laughing at Zhongli as the man elegantly held a tentacle between his chopsticks, hesitant to eat the dish. But still, he had made a promise, and the Geo user shakily brought the tentacle to his mouth, taking a small bite out of it, eliciting cheers from Hu Tao, Tartaglia and Xingqiu.

"Hey... you know... when I first set out on my journey with Paimon to find the Seven, Amber was the first person we ran into, and the first thing she did, even before bringing us to the city, was to offer to put up missing posters for me, before even asking us to help with the Stormterror situation." Aether stated, "Then we went to Liyue... and, well, first thing that happened was being a suspect in Rex Lapis' death."

Diluc let out a small hum, and Aether continued, "So that happened, and Childe ended up rescuing us from the Millelith, and in the end... well, even if he was using us, Childe was also being used."

"You mean he was set up?" Diluc clarified.

"Yeah. In a way." Aether shrugged, "Look... Diluc... I'm not asking you to be friends with Childe, or even like him. But maybe... you know... keep an open mind. Don't just judge him simply because he's a Fatui Harbinger."

Diluc thought about it long and hard, before he sighed, "Very well."

Tartaglia shifted about uncomfortably on the couch, first laying on his arm, then on his back, then on his other arm, and then on his chest. He just couldn't figure out a good position to sleep in, flipping this way and that, and at this point, he was even considering forcing himself to pass out by smothering himself with his pillow. Zhongli had insisted on remaining by his side, and ended up resting on a mattress right next to his couch.

The Harbinger let out a small groan, as he wiggled around like a worm beneath his sheets, before eventually kicking his blanket off all together.

He just couldn't sleep. He heard a soft snore from Chongyun in the corner of the room, where he was snuggled up with Xingqiu.

He was mentally exhausted, having to live through everything again, but unlike the previous night, where he was also physically drained, and the comforting presence of Zhongli calmed him and allowed him to have a brief respite, right now, he was way too tense.

Tartaglia liked to think he adapted to new environments rather easily, but really, all he was good for was adapting to new fighting styles and enemies. When it came to resting and sleeping... well, it wouldn't be the first time some older Fatui members under Scaramouche or Dottore attempted to assassinate him in his sleep, thinking he was unworthy of his Harbinger title.

Whether it be sleeping in the Fatui barracks while he was still a trainee, or in his office after he had become a Harbinger, or even in his temporary apartment while in Liyue, Tartaglia had never really been able to fully relax.

Even at home, on the rare times he was forced to take a vacation, the only reason Tartaglia would sleep more than a few hours would be because he overworked himself to the point of exhaustion and passing out on the spot.

Tartaglia flipped onto his back again. Ganyu, famous in Liyue for taking on a ridiculous amount of work while working as the General Secretary of the Liyue Qixing, was snoring and muttering something about Sweet Flowers and not to touch her horns.

As a Harbinger, Tartaglia wouldabsolutelylove to give them a little poke, just to rile the Adeptus up for a good fight. Also he was curious; were her horns smooth, like freshly lacquered wood? Or were they covered in a small layer of delicate, velvety fur, like deer antlers?

But he's never been able to sleep soundly, regardless whether there were people milling about, or plotting to murder him in his sleep, and the rare times he managed to close his eyes, his mind was instantly blasted with darkness and corruption...

Ganyu deserved her sleep; Childe couldn't take that away from her.

Childe flipped onto his side, then onto his other side. It was impossible to sleep here, especially with all the sleep talking by Keqing; curled up by Ganyu's side, the purple haired Yuheng murmured something about a Guoba (wasn't that Xiangling's pet bear?) and cornbread buns. Huh, maybe she was hungry?

Childe filed it away for later; Xiangling had taught him how to make Chili-Mince Cornbread Buns before, and he would say that he was pretty proficient in that regard. Maybe he could make some for breakfast, so Keqing would feel better (and maybe as a bribe so she would hate him less and not kick him out of Liyue).

More importantly, how was he supposed to sleep with all the muttering and snoring going on all around him? It was so noisy; Childe couldn't help but be on guard, trying to listen for any sounds of people trying to sneak up on him and stick a knife through his heart.

Or any Rifthounds or other monsters or Abyss Mages that used their stupid Abyssal magic to track him to his house, deciding to take out a Vanguard of the Harbingers before the Tsaritsa gained more power.

Or even his younger siblings, who thought it would be a terrific idea to wake up him up by leaping onto his resting body like he were a huge teddy bear, screaming at him to wake up and to make a snowman with them.

Childe would never forget that time he nearly skewered Anthon with a Hydro dagger, before coming into his senses in time to dissipate the weapon before he actually hurt his little brother. Thank goodness Anthon was way too young at the time to comprehend what had happened, and just assumed "Big Bro Ajax" had just been playing around with him.

If Ajax didn't know the Abyss was an alive, squirming mess of darkness, eating away at hopes and dreams, at nothing and at everything, he would wanted to scream into the void. He settled with smothering himself with a pillow, unable to scream either way, lest he wake the others.

Maybe the spirit of the Abyss was hanging out with all of its "Primordial-Gods-which-are-also-locations" friends, drinking tea or nasty corrupted river water as they laughed at this pathetic mortal as he relived the all the worst moments of his life, having all his acquaintances judge him for everything he's been through, and being protected by a former Archon that seemed fond of him for some reason despite nearly drowning his nation.

Xiao had holed himself up in a far corner of the room, crossing his arms as he leaned against the wall. Ajax wasn't sure if the Yaksha was asleep, but he knew for sure that the blonde Traveler was, using the Adeptus' leg as a pillow as he clutched a snoring Paimon, who rambling about Sticky Honey Roasts and Sweet Madames in her sleep, like a stuffed toy.

Ajax let out another sigh, and flipped around once more. He was pretty familiar with the timeline of events of his past, and he knew it wouldn't be long until he escaped the Abyss... and got home.

Then his father would throw him away like he was nothing, leaving him to look for a reason to live and finally finding refuge from his power-hungry ambitions that threatened to eat him from the inside out.

But now... Ajax didn't know if the Tsaritsa still thought if she could continue to manipulate Tartaglia, or if she decided that he had served his purpose and would want to rid herself of a parasite before it grew to strong, a tumor before it grew too large.

He would much rather Scaramouche be the one who was cut down by the Shogun than Signora; he hated The Fair Lady as much as the next person, especially so after he found her colluding with Zhongli and tricking him in Liyue, but he hated the shorty with the oversized hat even more; the Inazuman prototype puppet who just made verbal jabs in all the wrong, most inappropriate places, ripping mental walls down like he were merely peeling an orange, and then leaving his vulnerable victims out to rot, laughing and reveling in their misery like the empty, heartless bastard he was.

But at the very least, the death of the Eight Harbinger and the betrayal of the Sixth Harbinger would make His Queen think twice about getting rid of her own Harbingers... or maybe, it would make her consider whether it would take more effort than it was worth keeping tabs on her Harbingers.

Ajax let out a small whimper into his pillow, praying it would muffle the sound. He didn't need everyone finding out the Eleventh Harbinger was a scared, wimpy little kid fearing for his life.

He sensed Beidou occupying another corner of the room, drunk, but still as much as an adversary as ever. Kazuha was curled up in a ball near her, his hand on his sword even as he slept, and Ajax figured it was because Kazuha had spent a lot of time on Beidou's ship, and felt safer, more comfortable with her.

Meanwhile, Qiqi had sought out a Cryo user in the middle of the night, and had ended up falling asleep between Ayaka and Thoma.

Ajax couldn't remember the last time he's been comfortable enough around someone to relax, let alone sleep. Well, except for that time Zhongli had invited him over to his house for dinner, and he ended up falling asleep while the god was rambling about Bamboo Shoot Soup...

Or that other time he had invited Zhongli over and the elder had brought some Fire-Water he obtained from a Snezhnayan merchant (that had been taken out of Zhongli's paycheck, Hu Tao had assured him), and he had a bit too much to drink, that combined with his severe exhaustion, and he had passed out by the dining table, resulting in Zhongli tucking him in and sleeping on his couch to take care of him...

Or that other, other time where they had a hike in Guyun Stone Forest, admiring the scenery while perched upon the remnants of stone lances that Rex Lapis had thrown while defeating Osial, and Ajax had fallen asleep while Zhongli was explaining the location's history...

Or that other, other, other time they had visited Qingce Village to check out this cave which was supposedly the resting place of Chi, and they had rented a small room from Granny Ruoxin when it turned dark because the trek back to Liyue Harbor would take a few hours...

Or the previous night, where they both sat on the floor...

Ajax felt something around his wrist, and before he could react, he was yanked off the couch. He tumbled onto the soft mattress, and immediately tensed up, only to blink in confusion as Zhongli draped his blanket over them both, before settling back down.

The Harbinger let out a confused noise as the ex-Archon wrapped an arm around him and pulled him in, and Ajax found himself tucked up comfortably against Zhongli's chest.

"Zhong... li...?" Ajax whispered uncertainly, "What... are you..."

Ajax had to admit, Zhongli always enjoyed the contact, whether it be wiping blood off his face after a fight, reaching over to adjust his grasp on the Archon-forsaken chopsticks, or just placing a hand on his shoulder and looking over whenever something caught Ajax's eye at the market.

"Shhh, Childe. Just rest." Zhongli quietly murmured, gently carding his fingers through his ginger locks as he peered down at him with beautiful Cor Lapis eyes that literally glowed in the dark, "It's been a long day. Relax."

Zhongli certainly didn't seem like the "cuddly" type, not like the young exorcist or the playful Hydro boy, or even the bubbly Funeral Parlor Director; he's pretty sure he's seen her clinging onto Qiqi, or cheekily jumping out of bushes when she ambushed Xinyan and Yunjin and hugged them.

Maybe cuddling was just a Liyuen thing.

Though... Ajax would be lying if he said he didn't enjoy this. Zhongli was a constant during the best days of his life, sipping his tea and listening to him ramble about his day and complaining about paperwork.

Zhongli, who would set aside time for their daily meals, who would rush to finish his paperwork if Ajax ever requested his presence regarding some ancient Liyuen history, or relaxing excursions.

Zhongli, who never got tired of fixing his grasp on chopsticks, all the while explaining the concept and history behind the two stubborn sticks that refused to co-operate with him.

Zhongli, who had wanted nothing but peace, but had ended up spending his retirement worrying about him and how to apologize.

No one had ever done that for him. His fellow Harbingers mocked him, the Fatui underlings tried to assassinate him, his family practically disowned him, and he wasn't even sure if Her Majesty was thinking of getting rid of him.

But Zhongli, precious Zhongli, the only one who still stuck by him despite everything, who still tried to reach out despite Ajax pushing him away.

Ajax pressed himself against Zhongli, letting the god reach over, wrapping his arms around him. The last thing he remembered was eyes of shimmering gold, before his vision turned dark, and he drifted off to a dreamless slumber.

Chapter 17: Cause I barely see at all

Chapter Text

"Shh... don't be so loud..."

"Hu Tao, give me back my Kamera."

"Just give me a minute..."

Tartaglia winced at the noises, and opened his eyes slowly. He found himself staring at some beige fabric, and upon trailing his eyes upwards, he realized that Zhongli was still fast asleep, clutching him tightly. Even in his sleep, his beige blouse remained unwrinkled, his unbound hair spilling over his shoulder and over his pillow, looking as ethereal as a dragon.

The Harbinger whined, and pressed his cheek against Zhongli's shirt. He was so nice and comfortable, he had almost forgotten just why he had woken up.

"Ah, he's awake..."

Tartaglia blinked in confusion, before tilting his head.

Hu Tao had a Kamera in her hands, Aether was shaking his head while Chongyun tried to pull Xingqiu away, "Come on, it's rude."

Behind them, Ayato was drinking boba tea (where did he even get that?) along with Thoma, both of them observing the spectacle like it were a play.

"Wakey, wakey, lovey doveys." Hu Tao snickered, snapping a picture of his confused face.

"Wha..." Tartaglia tried to sit up without disturbing Zhongli, reaching out to snatch the Kamera, "Why, you little-"

"Nah uh uh. Bad Tarantula." Hu Tao waggled her finger at him, yanking the Kamera out of his grasp, "You already stole my consultant, you can't take this too."

"It doesn't even belong to you, give it back." Aether whined.

"That's not even my name. If you're so bad at speaking that you can't even pronounce my name right, I already gave you an easier name to call me by." Tartaglia mocked, "Or perhaps is"Childe"too difficult for you to pronounce?"

"You are childish, so..." Hu Tao shrugged, "You dug your own grave there, Master Tortilla."

"I will kill you, and stuff you in your own coffin. I hope you have one prepared for yourself. I'll even foot the bill for it." Tartaglia threatened, attempting to move Zhongli's arms away so he could throttle the younger girl, but a warning growl that came out of nowhere stopped him.

Before he could even reach, Zhongli yanked him back down, cuddling him against his chest like a dragon protecting his hoard of treasures, letting out a rumble from the back of his throat that sounded suspiciously like a purr as he fell back asleep.

Hu Tao's eyes gleamed, and she snapped another picture with Aether's Kamera.

"If Paimon starts grilling you about Mora because I have to buy more film, don't say I didn't warn you." Aether let out a tired sigh of resignation, before turning back to Tartaglia.

"Go back to sleep, most of the others are sleeping in. Can't say I blame them; Jean and Ayato are severely overworked, and being stuck here without being able to finish their backload of paperwork is probably weighing on them as well." Aether shook his head, "But I do suggest you get your Zhongli-Xianshengup soon, lest you want more teasing courtesy of Guuji Yae."

"I'll try. He's sleeping like a rock." Tartaglia nudged Zhongli gently, not wanting to wake him up, while Aether chuckled at the joke.

It took some time before Chongyun and Aether managed to corral Hu Tao and Xingqiu away, on the pretext of pranking the "stuffy Winery owner Master Diluc", and Tartaglia heaved a sigh of relief at the silence.

He snuggled closer to Zhongli, only to realise the Adeptus was looking at him through half lidded eyes.

"Comfortable?" Zhongli whispered.

"Mhm..." Tartaglia let the older man tug him closer, "You were awake?"

"Of course; I am an Adeptus, and I don't need much sleep at all. But if thatchildrealised I were awake, there is no doubt she would stay far longer to tease us." Zhongli grumbled, eliciting some chuckles from the Harbinger.

"On a more serious note... are you alright?" Zhongli asked quietly, "You said... this isn't the worst part..."

"It's not like we have a choice." Tartaglia reasoned, "The faster we get out of here, the better. If I have to bare my life experiences out for everyone to see in order to accomplish that, then so be it."

"That is not what I mean." Zhongli murmured, gently running his fingers through Tartaglia's hair, "The Abyss eats away at your will, offering false promises and delusions of grandeur, draining you until you are nothing but a shadow, a shade with no face, no memories, no life. Even if you managed to escape the pit... It will always come back to haunt you, whether you like it or not."

"I just don't think about it." Ajax admitted, "I just focus on getting stronger and fighting stronger opponents, fighting and improving myself."

"You're just running away from your problems." Zhongli chided, "It never works. The Abyss is an ancient force, powerful beyond all comprehension, using the darkness within as a catalyst. The more you run, the more you feed that darkness, and the more power the Abyss has over you."

The duo fell silent, and Ajax subconsciously tightened his grip on Zhongli as the god pulled him close.

Contrary to popular belief, the Eleventh Fatui Harbinger did not have a death wish. He just simply liked having thrilling fights, and enjoyed winning them, since it showed his constant improvement.

Ajax didn't want to lose to the Abyss.

He didn't want to know what would become of him if he did.

After a lively breakfast where Chongyun nearly choked on a Jueyun Chili, courtesy of Xingqiu, Ningguang finally called for everyone to clear up and to get ready, Tartaglia knew that he couldn't prolong this anymore.

He let out a sigh, resigning himself to his fate as he waited for everyone to settle down by the crystal. Brushing his hand against the Archon-forsaken object again and settling down with Zhongli, the room darkened, and the crystal shone to life. Everyone remained quiet, except for the quiet sounds of someone munching on Onigiri.

Ajax slowly opened his eyes.

The sight that lay before him wasn't of the Abyss. He was expecting stalagmites as sharp as teeth, and clouds the color of vaporized blood.

He wasn't standing on the cracked ground that could be the skin of an ancient creature, and sky that should be filled with dark red clouds was non-existent, and a sky as dark as the behemoth that had just swallowed him.

Instead, upon looking up, all Ajax saw was a dark, night sky, and yet, it was completely unrecognizable to him. Dotted with stars, galaxies swirling about in the cosmos like the cream his mother put in his hot chocolate on a particularly cold night.

Aether, Paimom, and Xiao's breaths hitched, as they remembered the sight that they saw while being trapped by the Fantastic Compass.

Ajax stood up, drinking in the sight in front of him.

It was a beautiful sight, of infinity, of everything and nothing.

"So... this is the Abyss..." Kokomi stared at the sight in awe, "It's beautiful..."

"Don't be fooled, Sole of the Deep." Yae glowered at the sight, "The nature of the Abyss isn't pretty by any means. What we have previously seen of the Abyss still holds true; this is just another facet of the darkness and corruption."

"You see all this, don't you? You are nothing; not even a drop of water in the ocean."A voice in his head whispered within his mind, and all around him, echoing as if he were trapped in a cavern instead of an inhumanely vast plain under the starlight.

Venti, Zhongli and Ei all froze up. They didn't recognize the voice, but they had a hunch, and if they were correct...

They'd rather be wrong.

The boy flinched, as he felt a tingle down his spine, as if something, or someone, were brushing a finger down his back.

"Is that a ghost?" Thoma hesitantly asked.

"I do not think there are ghosts down there." Ayato replied, "And if it were a ghost, I doubt it would be a pleasant one either."

"Don't fight me, because ultimately, it doesn't really matter." The voice hissed, and Ajax choked, feeling what felt likehandswrapping around his neck, threatening to strangle him. He reached up, scratching at the suffocating hands, but there was nothing there, and all Ajax did was claw at his own throat.

Gorou let out a terrified whimper, his tail flicking about nervously, and even Yae didn't have the heart to tease him about it; this was far too serious.

"So what if you get out of the Abyss? No matter what happens, you will die here, for you have already died. Immortals do not survive here, even less so for mortals."The hands slowly creeped up his face, brushing against his cheek, and yet, Ajax still felt like he was unable to breathe.

"Resistance is futile. Look around you. Look at all this;a world so huge, so inhumanely vast. Yet invisible to the mortal lens, for you puny creations of Celestia are unable to comprehend it... or perhaps, you just refuse to see that..."

Ajax's head was forcefully tilted upwards, his eyes glued to the starry sky that hung above him.

"Your life is nothing compared this infinite world around you." The voicecrooned,"Your belovedTeyvat is nothing but a ship in a bottle; a fake reality, a fabricated world to sate your shallow desires."

"What?" Kazuha, somehow still remaining calm, asked, "What do they mean? A fake reality? A fabricated world?"

He turned to the Electro Archon, but Ei sat, deathly still, refusing to answer him, so the wandering samurai turned to Venti.

"Sorry." Venti winced, "The winds hear a lot... but not everything. Even I don't truly have a full understanding of what's going on, or even if what I know is true or false."

The hands continued to creep upwards, sharp nails tapping against his nose, not pressed hard enough to break skin, but lingering just long enough as a constant reminder.

"Ah, how brightly burns the truth! But you do not have to suffer the fate that your Heavenly Principles has weaved for you. I can save you from that fate."The voice purred alluringly, right into his ear, as if whatever otherworldly creature was tormenting him was standing right behind him,"Do not reject the darkness, for your ambitions will swallow you whole. The world will fall, and all life will perish. But I can give you that power, power to do as you wish. No longer will you be bound by the false promises of the gods."

"No! Don't listen to them!" Keqing yelped, as Ganyu tried to comfort her.

"We can't do anything about it." Ningguang shot Tartaglia a pitying look, before closing her eyes. This may be beneficial to Liyue, would make great blackmail against the Harbinger, and would definitely help in chasing the cursed Fatui out of her home.

But Tartaglia was still a human. And some part of Ningguang felt that it was completely unfair to hang this over his head, like he hadn't suffered enough already.

The hands, no, claws, continued to creep upwards, and Ajax had a sinking feeling that they were hovering just above his eyes.

"Stay down here. Bow before the Abyss. Don't fight me. It will be far less painful, and all the more joyful."The voice hummed,"You'd like that, right? You've already suffered for so long..."

Claws sunk into his face, penetrating through his skull as if he were a snowman.Ajax screamed in pain as the claws clutched around his eyes, squishing and squeezing, threatening to yank them out of his sockets.

Hu Tao immediately reached out, covering Qiqi's eyes as the zombie let out a surprised noise, grabbing onto Hu Tao's hands in confusion, her hands cold even by undead standards.

Ayaka gasped, and covered her mouth in horror, and Thoma and Ayato immediately shuffled closer to her.

Sara clenched her fists tightly, her knuckles as white as the joint bones of butchered fowl as fear tingled down her spine like Electro, and even Ei flinched at the sight.

And yet, through it all, Ajax could still see, through the invisible, unseen force, staring at a galaxy of stars like broken hopes and dreams of all those who have fallen, who have seen the truth, who realized just how insignificant their puny little lives were, who have come to the realization that their lives and everything they represent were meaningless.

For what was the point in ambition, if ultimately, all that ambition would get you nowhere, being unable to make a consequential impact on the world?

That was the true darkness of the Abyss, a speck of nothingness in such a vast, empty, open world. A world where only the highest of the gods could make an impact, and anything lesser were just swatted away like co*ckroaches if they strayed too far from Celestia's ideals.

Suddenly, Aether was so, so relieved that Zhongli had rescued Xiao from the Fantastic Compass, and used one arm to hold onto Paimon while using the other to cling to the Yaksha. After a lifetime of pain and suffering and loss, Xiao was living without truly living. He went through the motions, eating and drinking and resting and fighting, following his contract with Rex Lapis loyally like it was all he had left.

Because it really was all Xiao had.

His life had been ripped away from him when that Archon-forsaken god enslaved him, treating him like a weapon and condemning him to a lifetime of hunger and torture. Rex Lapis had saved him from that fate, and yet, he had faked his death, leaving Xiao lost and confused in a vast world of infinite choices and infinite uncertainty, even though Xiao knew the truth about Zhongli's retirement.

Aether couldn't imagine what would come of Xiao if he had fallen into darkness, letting the magic of the Fantastic Compass consume his thoughts like the dreams he was forced to devour while being enslaved, being abandoned once again. The Abyss they had seen in the Compass might have just be an illusion, but Xiao didn't need the Abyss whispering lies to him, telling him that his life was worthless, meaningless; he's already suffered enough.

Ajax screamed.

He screamed as he felt his eyeballs being ripped away from him, blind to everything but the truth of the Abyss.

He screamed until his voice was hoarse, as blood poured out his empty, unseeing sockets like a river, staining his body black with his corrupted blood.

Barbara let out a horrified screech at the gory scene, and Jean did her best to comfort her sister despite the blood draining from her face, the picture of a poor scared teenager, a tortured soul, being seared into her retinas.

He screamed, and yet, he could hear the voice laughing.

Razor sharp claws digging into his throat, ripping out his vocal chords. He gurgled, choking on his blood, trying desperately to take a breath as his lungs were filled with putrid, vile fluids, roiling in his pain and misery.

Xingqiu clung onto Chongyun in terror, breathing like they had just run all the way from Liyue Harbor to Qingce Village and back.

Even Diluc looked particularly disturbed by the scene, clenching his fists so tightly he felt a cramp forming. He had travelled all over Teyvat before coming back to Mondstadt, but he had never visited a place that made his legs feel so weak.

And everything fell silent.

Ajax's eyes flew open, as he lurched up into a sitting position, breathing heavily.

"Oh... oh Archons..." Noelle stuttered, "It was a dream..."

"A positively horrifying dream, at that." Beidou shuddered, looking at Tartaglia.

"He didn't even do anything." Zhongli deadpanned, as deadly calm as ever, but the man was clutching onto the Harbinger like a lifeline, as if Tartaglia would be pulled back into the Abyss and disappear if the dragon didn't cling onto him for all he was worth.

"Not blaming him." Beidou shook her head, "But that is probably the worst thing I've seen in my entire lifetime, and Childe was... what... fourteen?"

His entire body was in pain, as if the Tsaritsa herself had decided he had committed some sort of crime and had struck him down personally, though some primal feeling in his gut told him what had happened was far, far worse that getting on his goddess'bad side.

He felt like his bones were broken, his muscles howling in agony, and Ajax relaxed, trying to find some semblance of a respite from his pain.

All he remembered was falling into the jaws of some gigantic beast...

"You're awake."

Ajax groaned, as pain shot through his entire body like lightning, burning him from the inside out, but he looked up, noticing the familiar armored face of the Abyss Herald looking down at him.

"For once, I'm relieved to see an Abyss Herald..." Kazuha admitted.

"Do not move. You mortals are delicate." She chastised,"Your body will need time to recover for pulling a stunt like that."

"What... happened...?" He managed to choke out, shaking his head, trying to forget the feeling of drowning in his own blood.

"You... don't..."The Herald shook her head,"Forget it. Perhaps it's better if you don't remember. Fragile mortal minds can only take so much before they shatter."

Venti could only shudder, remembering how Hans Archibald had been consumed by his grief at the loss of Stanley that he devoted the rest of his life to ensuring that the tales of the late Stanley would never be forgotten.

Humans were resilient, but there was a limit to how much they could take, how much they could tolerate, before the burden becomes too much to bear.

Ajax could barely make out her words; his ears were ringing like bells, his head felt like it was stuffed full of cotton and acid.

She stood up, looking down at him,"Just remember, the Abyss is no place for the weak. You must fight with everything you have, and more that everything. Then, and only then, would you be able to survive.For the Abyss is always changing, and if you don't stay ahead, the darkness will swallow you whole. The only way to survive is to be strong."

His eyes drooped from exhaustion, but despite that, he curled in on himself protectively, ignoring the way his bodyscreamedat him to stop, allowing him to observe his surroundings. It took him some time to realize that he was wrapped up, nice and warm, in his winter coats, but something else caught his eye, and the young Snezhnayan raised his head.

Ajax gasped.

The sight that met him was exactly that of his dream; a swirling galaxy of everything and nothing.

He felt pain welling up him the pit of his very being, and he knew it wasn't from his broken bones and muscles that have been shredded to bits.The boy let out a muffled, defeated whine, h is eyes dark, barely reflecting any light, like a shattered mirror, as if inside him had broken permanently.

The Abyss Herald seemed to follow his train of thought, and shook her head,"Don't think about it too much. Many have fallen this way; deeming themselves as insignificant, and feeding the darkness. You should be happy to be alive. Your existence is real, and life is precious; you should treasure it. Be happy to be alive; otherwise, what else is left for you?"

Ajax turned to look at her, letting out a pained noise of confusion, wincing as he felt his injuries flare up again.

Even if it was just a dream, the sensation of being manhandled so easily... it just didn't sit right with him. Ajax hated just how weak he felt, how useless and helpless he was, unable to do anything as the invisible, unseen entity ripped his eyes and vocal chords out.

He never wanted to feel so weak ever again.

Chapter 18: Can't hear me scream from the Abyss

Chapter Text

"Are you okay?" Zhongli quietly whispered, watching his companion shudder next to him, wincing as if watching his own memories were hurting him.

Tartaglia was obviously not taking this too well, looking much too vulnerable, too scared, too unsure of himself. And Zhongli wasn't sure if that was a good or bad thing. For one, he was fairly certain that the Harbinger had never been able to process his trauma in a healthy way; he had most likely shoved it to the back of his mind and busied himself with other work, doing his best to never ever confront it.

Or, more likely, no one ever believed him. Ajax had never been able to confront it because everyone believed that he was making it up, making him think that everything was in his head, that it wasn't the Abyss that was the issue, but rather, him.

It was a reasonable assumption. Most Vision bearers wouldn't even be aware of the existence of the Abyss if it weren't for the Abyss Order wrecking havoc throughout Teyvat, and even then, they didn't understand the intricacies of the realm of the damned.

As for regular mortals... well... it did make sense that in a small village like Morepesok, they'd be far more familiar with fishing, or inspiring, light-hearted tales for kids to pick up on vital virtues, than the absolute darkness and depressive nature of the Abyss.

But just because it was reasonable, didn't mean that Zhongli would accept it. Tartaglia meant the world to him, and he was hurting, and the fact that the ex-Archon couldn't find a way to help him made him fell so... pathetic.

What kind of god was he, unable to help someone close to him, if not a useless one?

On the other hand... he really didn't want Tartaglia to have a mental breakdown in front of everyone. The young Harbinger was already stressed enough, he didn't need everyone's (probably well-meaning and unintentional) judging gazes on him as well, now that they knew he was Ajax.

But calling a break this early would only bring more attention to Tartaglia, something he probably wouldn't appreciate at this moment.

Ajax had no idea how long he had spent in the throes of the Abyss.

After he had recovered (which basically meant his body had mended itselfsufficiently so he could still walk and fight without crumbling like light, powdery snow, even as pain fried every nerve in his body like Electro), every day was just a repeating cycle of pain, pain, pain, fighting, and more pain.

It seemed like the Abyss Herald, for whatever reason, was pushing him harder than ever, leading him towards hoards of Rifthound packs and any other monster she could find. Hisbody felt like a worn, tattered parchment, barely holding together at the seams, as he hacked through an Electro Rifthound's spine,swiftly severing its head from its body before it could command the whelps to attack.

He had even stumbled upon what the Abyss Herald dubbed a "Wolflord", the ruler of the Riftwolves, a skeletal canine like its smaller counterparts, but lacking the limbs, making it look more like a serpentine dragon with a wolf's head attached to it.

"Hey... isn't that the Golden Wolflord from Tsurumi Island?" Paimon asked.

"Tsurumi Island?" Beidou asked, "I'd assume it's in Inazuma, since Mondstadt and Liyue do not really have islands..."

She turned to Kazuha, and both of them let out confused shrugs.

"I am not aware of a place called"Tsurumi Island"." Kazuha admitted.

"It's a place shrouded in dense fog, filled with ghosts reliving the past, though one of the ghosts was... rather unique." Aether said, "They used to worship a god called Kapatcir, before..."

He couldn't continue his explanation; how could he tell them about Tsurumi's curse, born of rage and sorrow, of death and vengence? How could he talk about Ruu's death like it was some kind of fairytale, knowing the child hadknowinglylet himself be sacrificed to protect his friends and people, innocently unaware that such an action had resulted in the god's massacre of the entire island in her grief and vengeance?

A majestic beast, all things considered, but far less majestic when the Nameless King of the Rift opted to slam him into the ground, making the ground rupture apart, corrosive poison seeping through the cracks and sapping his already limited strength.

The Abyss Herald just watched, motionlessly, letting the twisted beast slice at him with its tail, floating back into the air, far out of Ajax's reach, before engulfing him in a gigantic twister that consisted of sand and dirt and rocks the size of mountains, slamming into his gut before he could even react and regain his footing.

Such dirty tactics, Ajax seethed internally, theWolflordwas just running (or rather, flying) away and taking cheap shots at him, and occasionally hiding behind a shield. This wasn't a fun fight; at least the Rifthounds and the Whelps met his attacks head on with their claws and teeth and poison, instead of this lame "hit and run" tactic.

If Ajax had a bow, he would most definitely be shooting arrows at theWolflord, but using Hydro to emulate the elasticity of a bow and thetension of a the bowstring was almost impossible, let alone finding the balance between the two to ensure whatever bow he made wouldn't disintegrate on itself after one shot.

"Now that you mention it..." Kaeya mused, "No wonder you're so bad with the bow. You can emulate weapons with your Hydro Vision, but a bow..."

"He can't be that bad..." Venti tilted his head, "I mean... he can hit a target, right?"

"Oh, he can hit a target pretty well." Thoma nodded, before scratching the back of his head, "But his stance is... uh...pretty bad..."

Tartaglia just rolled his eyes, "Ha ha, go on, make fun of me. Is it "Bully the Harbinger" day?"

For now, he was stuck with close range, melee Hydro weaponry, and unless he wantedto waste hisenergy hurling Hydro at the wolf in the air, where it had sufficient time to dodge, Ajax had to wait for the wolf to come back down within hitting range.

And while that was happening, the corrosive poison of the wolves was still eating away at him from the inside out.

Ajax hastily dove to the ground, ducking as the Wolflord shot off a huge laser, before going back to hack away at the Rifthound Skulls. It took way too much time, but finally, he finished off the lasr one, and the gigantic serpent crashed into the ground like a meteor, giving Ajax the perfect opportunity to strike.

The boy leapt at the downed creature, his instincts instantly taking advantage of his opponent's vulnerability. He infused his shortsword with Hydro in order to conserve his energy, before tearing into the Wolflord with hungry ferocity, ignoring the beast's whines and yips of pain as he dug his weapon between its skeletal, interlocking, delicate vertebrae.

It wasn't long before the Wolflord regained enough energy to flee the scene, its howls of pain echoing all around him.

"Aw yeah!" Amber cheered, "You got em!"

Ajax collapsed on the ground, trying his best not to throw up as poison coursed through his veins.

"A rift to the surface, a beastly fissure torn apart by the very claws of the foe you have bested."The Abyss Herald stated, walking closer to the fracture, a chilly breeze, followed by several snowflakes, trickling in through the rift.

"Wait... snow?" Chongyun's eyes widened, "Could it be..."

"Either Dragonspine or Snezhnaya." Albedo concluded, "Hopefully, in Childe's case, it's the latter."

"Wait... if it really is the Golden Wolflord... wouldn't the portal lead to Tsurumi? Why would it lead to Snezhnaya? Aether did say he could find it there..." Gorou asked.

"I don't know, maybe it wanted to take a vacation." Kaeya shrugged, "Or maybe it's a different one?"

"Normally, I'd say you're being absolutely stupid about a monster of the Abyss"wanting to take a vacation"." Diluc snarked, "But I'd rather there only be one Wolflord rather than two, so for once, I'd prefer that suggestion."

Ajax remained on the floor, trying to catch his breath, as the Abyss Herald brushed an armored finger against the rippling portal that looked like it would flicked out of existence at any second.

"Like its creator, the Golden Wolflord has no love for the surface-dwelling mortals who live under the protection of the gods."She commented,"The rift usually leads to an island of which no humans dwell, a land of Electro that has been lost to time, locked in an endless loop of Eternity, in a perverse sense of the word."

"You wished to go home, no? Back to the land of frost and snow?"She faced the boy, gesturing towards the rift in space itself,"That is your exit."

"Huh?" Ajax blinked dumbly.

"That. Is. Your. Exit." Xingqiu repeated slowly, making sure to emphasis every single word.

"Yes, I know that, I'm not stupid!" Tartaglia grumbled.

"The Abyss is a winding maze of pain and misfortune, a torturous web of lies and deceit, an abstract labyrinth of misdirection and confusion."She hissed,"The Riftwolves were created to erode the boundaries of the world, driven by their hatred, and therein lies your solution. However, in the absence of the Wolflord, the rift will close on its own. You do not have much time before your only path disappears."

Ajax let out a sigh, before taking a step towards the rift, excited at the prospect of finally,finallybeing able to escape this hellhole, to go home and see his family again.

But she turned around, a familiar Hydro blade extending from her wrist as she stepped between Ajax and the rift. Dropping into a fighting stance, she growled, "But the Abyss would not let you go so easily, and neither will I. "

Zhongli growled, wrapping his arms tightly around Tartaglia's waist.

"What?" Noelle gasped, "I thought... I thought she was on your side?"

"Apparently not." Diluc scowled, "Abyssal scum."

Before he could even blink, the Abyss Herald had lunged towards him, slamming the blunt side of her Hydro blade into his gut. Ajax was sent flying, his back crashing into the wall of the cavern, but the boy hastily got to his feet and jumped to the side as the Herald sent a cross-shaped wave of Hydro at him.

"Ok, she is really trying to murder you." Venti squeaked.

"Still too soft. Still to weak. Shouldn't let your guard down, boy." The Herald snarled,"You would leave the place that makes you, you? Know you place, child, and bow before the Abyss, for without it, you are nothing."

Ajax ducked and rolled out of the way as the Herald shot forward and sliced at him, before attempting to hit her with his rusty shortsword. All his attacks were parried away effortlessly, and she easily knocked his sword out of his hands.

"There's no way he can win, even by my best calculations..." Kokomi sighed, shaking her head, "She has far more experience than him, and he hasn't recovered from his previous fight."

The boy growled, before using his Vision to create two Hydro daggers in the blink of an eye, lunging at her as he snarled.

The Abyss Herald didn't even flinch, dodging his first attack with inhumane dexterity, and shoving her elbow into his chest, knocking him into the ground, all the while resolutely keeping on arm behind her, using it to neither attack nor shield herself.

"I can't tell if she's purposely holding back, or she thinks that he's so weak she doesn't even need tobotherusing both hands." Sara stated firmly.

And yet, Ajax found himself horribly outclassed and outmatched at every turn. Every step towards the rift he took, the Abyss Herald would force him back five steps. Every time he decided on a course of action in an attempt to outmaneuver her, he found himself further away from the rift than before.

Worst still, Ajax knew that she wasn't even trying. If the Herald wanted him dead, she wouldn't even be giving him the opportunity to fight back, let alone giving him enough time to stand up and catch his breath.

She was already restraining herself, only allowing herself to use one arm, and yet, Ajax could barely make a dent in her armor, locking them in this endless fight, trapped in a deadly tango for eternity, weaving around each other, neither giving nor taking an inch (even if the Herald was going rather easy on him).

And then, the Herald's left shoulder dippedeverso slightly.

Kazuha frowned slightly. He's fought Abyss Heralds before, and he knew it would takefar moredamage than what a tired, injured fourteen year old could deal to even wear one down.

So why was the Herald purposefully leaving weak points for the boy to target?

There.

Ajax let his instincts guide him, letting agitated, anger, frustration, everything bubble up from his bruised gut as heslammed a blade against the Abyss Herald. He didn't do much damage, but she stumbled, creating even more weak points for him to exploit.

There... there...His mind urged, adapting to the speed of his opponent. He whipped and whirled around, slamming his Hydro blades into chinks in her armor, forcing the Herald to focus on defending and creating even more weaknesses for him to target.

Go on,his mind whispered, as he slashed at her leg.

Keep going, kill her, destroy her, that's the only way to be strong...

He lunged forward, slamming his blade into her arm and ripping it out ferociously.

"Oh...oh..." Ganyu's eyes widened in a panic, and Xiao also tensed up in realization.

The strong live, the weak die.

He hissed, digging his daggers into the Herald's chest, but they shattered on impact against her armor.

Isn't it nice to be strong? To be alive?

He wasn't deterred in the slightest, he just created another pair of daggers out of Hydro and lunged forward.Watching his foe shiver and stumble under his heel, the darkness coursing through his veins, it felt so... addictive, so intoxicating...

He could just stay down here forever, tofeelthis way forever. No longer the meek and timid child from Morepesok of Snezhnaya, a nameless boy from a nameless family, destined to be trapped by poverty and a horrible fate weaved by the Heavens.

He could have power, he could wreak havoc and conflict, he could fight everything and anything, everyone and anyone, he could do as he liked...

He could finally be someone.

Why was he fighting again?

Zhongli clutched Tartaglia even tighter. He usually manifested his more draconic traits together, being more used to letting his horns and tail out rather than only one of those traits. He wasn't against it, but the main problem with that was that his hornsglowed.

In the darkness of the room, there was no doubt thatliteral glowing horns similar to that of a recently deceased Archonwould attract some attention, and that was something Zhongli absolutely did NOT want, even if everyone was most likely distracted by Tartaglia's memories.

It would take a bit more energy on his part, energy he definitely should be conserving, considering the nature of the place they were currently trapped in, but it was worth a shot.

Zhongli closed his eyes, slightly adjusting the way he sat and letting his tail manifest, but forcing his horns to remain hidden. The god gently maneuvered his tail by Tartaglia's back, letting it wrap around his waist. He rested the appendage on Tartaglia's lap, before lightly flicking the golden plumes at the end of his tail into the Harbinger's face.

That got Tartaglia's attention, and the young man looked up at Zhongli in surprise, slowly, hesitantly reaching out to run his fingers through the silken soft fur.

Zhongli looked into Tartaglia's eyes, orbs of the shade of the purest of Noctilucous Jade, as blue and as dark as the ocean depths. Eyes that normally looked so dead, so lifeless, but in the darkness of the room, being forced to face his trauma headfirst, his eyes shone with so much fear, so much desperation, with so much life.

The god nodded at the Harbinger resolutely, a quiet statement that he would always support him, no matter what happened.

Tartaglia wrapped his arms tightly around the scaled appendage, before shooting Zhongli a weak, shaky smile, resting his body weight against the god, for once, allowing someone else to take over the duty of protecting him, acknowledging that even if his time with the Tsaritsa really came to an end, and his parents chased him away, there was still someone looking out for him.

I want to go home, Ajax screamed at him, I will go home.

Home... where was home... what was home...

He caught sight of the rift behind the Herald, the black swirling with gold, contrasting like blood on pure white snow.

I want to see my family again, Ajax yelled inside his head.

Oh, right, that was his original goal, the rift. The rift that led back to Snezhnaya.

The rift that led back to his home, his family.

He needed to get to the rift. The Herald was merely a distraction.

Ajax twirled his daggers elegantly, before rushing the Herald. She just stood there, raising her arm, extending her Hydro powers so she had an entire Hydro greatsword protruding from her wrist. She let the boy get closer, closer,closer...

Ajax slammed his Hydro daggers into her claymore, pushing her back, putting all his weight, all his power, all his energy into his attack.

He just needed to knock her off balance, and duck under her larger form...

His Hydro daggers shattered once more.

"Oh no!" Barbara yelped, clinging to her older sister.

Ajax blinked, as his momentum carried him forwards directly into the Abyss Herald's Hydro sword.

He blinked again, and he saw nothing, except his face hitting the ground as he lost his balance. He tumbled forward, and hastily got to his feet, creating yet another set of Hydro weaponry to protect himself.

And yet, the Abyss Herald just regarded him, standing motionlessly, like Ajax hadn't nearly skewered himself on her sword had she not dissipated her weapon in time. She stared at him, before turned around, walking towards the wall where he had left his rusted shortsword. She picked it up, before returned to his side, holding out his sword to him,"Take it, and go. The rift will not last muchlonger."

"Wait... what?" Keqing frowned, utterly confused, "Didn't she just try to kill him?"

Ajax just looked up at her, confused, like she were speaking in some foreign tongue.

" Are you sure you want to go? You can still choose to stay. With me."She offered, uncharacteristically softly and fondly for a creature of a race that was well known for wrecking havoc all throughout Teyvat,"Abilities you have demonstrated down here, powered by the darkness in your veins, may not entirely work on the surface at least, not without fatal consequences. The power of the Abyss is devastating to those from above, and you, who have escaped, is no exception. But you can always get stronger here. Human, god, monster, there is no differentiation, there are no limits."

Ajax looked up at her, his hands shaking. He wasn't sure if it was from fear, from the chilly winds entering the cavern via the rift, his own trepidation and hesitance...

"Like I said before... the corruption has taken root, nestled deep within your heart. You have changed, and clinging onto your memories of a past life will only serve to hurt you. You can never live again, neither amongst mortals, nor amongst gods." She forced the sword into his limp, trembling hands, "Darkness that has permeated every part of you; it has become you, and you have become it.You can never escape its grasp, for it has granted you new life. "

"But you can give them all up and stay here. Do you still wish to return, knowing that your heart has been twisted by the depths, no longer human?" She murmured, "Knowing that everything that has happened here will eat away at your sanity, chipping away at your ambition and resolve until you're nothing but an empty husk? Knowing that your strengths are your weaknesses, and it's only a matter of time before you implode from your ambition and stubbornness? "

"I..." Ajax's words were lodged in his throat, "I want to go home... I need to get home..."

He paused for a minute, before he reached out for the Herald, tugging on her armored arm like a petulant child, "You can come with me. Back to Snezhnaya."

"Really?" Diluc looked at Tartaglia, pointedlyignoringthe draconic tail the Harbinger was clinging to.

"Don't really blame him." Kaeya stuck his tongue out at the redhead, his eyes practically screaming"You tried to kill me, but here we are", and Diluc sighed.

"No. Heavens destroyed our homeland, placing a curse upon us to never see the light again. W e were innocent, finding our own means to thrive outside the realm of the gods, and yet... now, the Order wishes to inflict the same pain on the surface dwellers who were not even alive in that era, let alone having participated in our demise." She shook her head," We may not fond of this war brewing between the Order and the Archons, b ut while the peaceful ones do not enjoy mindless carnage,we are all still loyal to the throne. If we do not aid the efforts, the least we can do is to not get in the way."

She paused, "And perhaps... we don't belong."

"Of course you don't." Ei muttered angrily, but Yae just nudged her.

There was silence between them, before the Herald pushed him closer to the portal.

"Will I... ever see you again?" Ajax asked, slightly hopefully. No matter what, she had still taken him under her wing, teaching him to fight, to use his Vision, to navigate the Abyss safely (by Abyss standards), even if her methods were... rather questionable.

She turned away from him,"Pray that you don't. For that means that either the worst has come, or you have somehow managed to find your way back down here again. "

Ajax turned towards the rift, before turning to look back at the Herald, his heart bubbling with frustration that definitely shouldn't be there, especially since he could finally go home, achieving his goal ever since he fell into the depths.

"You went easy on me." He bitterly groaned.

"Don't be stupid, boy."She scoffed,"I've spent much time fighting and training otherswhile I was mortal, far longer than you have even been alive, even before the curse. Now, I have spent millennia honing my skills, fending off every kind of vile creature you could even think of. You couldn't beat me in a million years."

The duo fell silent again, and the Herald nudged him towards the rift once more,"Hurry. You barely have a minute before the rift in space closes again. Once it closes... well, the Abyss will ensure that this is the last time an escape will be available to you."

"I thought you said that the terminology for time that we use is a mortal construct you haven't used in eons." Ajax snarkily stated.

"Not the time for sass, Tortuga." Hu Tao mocked.

"Cheeky boy. Go quickly, and leave this place while you still have the chance. Live your mortal life, as you wished." She stated, pushing him into the rift, "Be careful. The Abyss has already left its mark, and it will not let go so easily. And the same trick will not work twice; do not find yourself down here again, for then, there will really be no way back."

"Hold on, at least... tell me your name!" Ajax yelped, feeling the pull of the fissure in space.

"Names are sacred, child."She whispered, slowly backing away, "But still..."

Ajax couldn't hear anything, wind whipping past him as he was sucked in by the rift. He felt like he was being stretched apart, being tugged on both ends by some phantom force.

Voices whispered in his ear, urging him to stay, to not leave, but Ajax pressed on, determined to get back home,as something else, a name, echoed at the back of his mind.

S̵̪͝k̴̾ͅi̴͇̋r̸̛̠k̴̠̒.

Ripples of black and gold obscured his vision, once again leaving him blind and helpless, shrouded in darkness, with snow pelting against his battered body, the chilly, frosty winds of Snezhnaya filling his lungs, a literal breath of fresh air compared to all the toxic, poisonous, miasmic air of the Abyss.

Chapter 19: The misery eats you alive

Chapter Text

"Childe... he got out... right?" Xingqiu asked nervously, "I can't take the suspense!"

"He's literally sitting right there." Diluc snorted, "Obviously he got out."

When Ajax opened his eyes, he could see stars.

He wasn't dizzy, he could legitimately see the sky, the constellations sprinkled about like snowflakes. His winter coats sat, sprawled in the snow, but the Snezhnayan couldn't feel the cold, only pain flashing through his body like he had just been electrocuted.

The boy pushed himself up from the mound of snow he had been lying on. He must have passed out after returning to the surface, the sudden change from the miasmic atmosphere of the Abyss to the snowy plains of Snezhnaya having been a shock to his system, though luckily, not for long, as even in the warmest months, one could literally freeze to death just by standing in one place for too long, let alone sleeping in the snow.

Upon looking around, the Wolflord's rift was nowhere to be seen, with only a crimson red, vaguely humanoid hole in the snow as any indication that he was even there.

Ajax numbly shrugged his winter coats on, trying to use it to cover his blood-soaked undershirt more than trying to use it to combat the cold, before sheathing his shortsword.

He was back home, back in Snezhnaya, back in Morepesok…

So why was his heart still pounding, why was he still so scared, so terrified?

"A change in scenery." Kokomi commented, "After spending so much time in the Abyss, he's probably gotten used to the environment there."

"The Abyss has already left its mark, and it will not let go so easily."

"The fight against corruption is a fight that even the strongest of gods can't hope to win, let alone a mortal. The power of the depths is ancient, even when time first began to flow, never ending, never changing. You can't escape, boy, and even on the off chance that you do, you'll never be the same; you'd be unrecognizable."

"You can never live again, neither amongst mortals, nor amongst gods. Darkness that has permeated every part of you; it has become you, and you have become it. You can never escape its grasp, for it has granted you new life."

That's whatshehad said, before he had escaped. He couldn't fully comprehend whatshemeant with those words, being far too busy trying to stay alive, to grow stronger, to get home.

But now that he was back in Snezhnaya...

Something in the snow glowed, and Ajax peered down. His Vision, glowing in time with his racing heart, and the boy picked it up, stuffing in his pocket, before noticing that there was something else inside.

He pulled the item out, and in the faint moonlight, he could see the outline of a Rifthound claw. He didn't know how it had ended up in his pocket... but he had other priorities at the moment.

"Did Skirk keep it for him and put it in his pocket?" Amber asked, but no one, not even Tartaglia, could answer her question.

Ajax took in his surroundings once more. He couldn't tell where exactly he was, of if he was even in Morepesok, but his gut was screaming at him, so he listened, letting his senses guide him towards his destination.

He walked.

And walked.

And walked some more.

He didn't know where he was going, every muscle in his body flaring up in pain with every step he took. But he was close, oh so close, and he couldn't give up now.

So he continued trudging forwards, one step at a time, leaving a bloody trail behind him as he forged ahead, using the trees as supports to lessen the burden on his beaten, battered body.

"Ajax?"

No one, save for Tartaglia, recognized the woman's voice, and they all sucked in their breaths in trepidation, fearing the worst. The last thing they wanted was for some evil lady to take advantage of a tired, injured fourteen year old boy, even though they were fairly sure the Harbinger could probably fend off any random child trafficker or kidnapped easily.

Upon hearing his name, the boy froze.

Who was calling his name, in the dead of night? It was familiar... but Ajax couldn't really place it, not when there could be monsters lurking in the shadows, behind the trees, deep within the forest, just out of sight.

"Ajax? Where are you?" Another feminine voice rang out, as familiar as the first voice, but this one sounded slightly younger. Dim lights appeared in the distance, and his instincts screamed at him to get away from the light, to avoid being seen, to investigate what was stalking him in the dark, before slaughtering them in cold blood.

But he needed to get home. He had to get home. If there were lights, that meant there were people.

Maybe he could get help.

And so, he stopped, waiting, catching his breath, letting the chilly winds and snow numb his aching limbs, preserving his energy in case he did have to fight.

"Hello? Is anyone there?"

A familiar face popped out of the darkness, but Ajax could make out every detail of her face despite the lack of light.

" Do you need..." The lady swung her lantern in his face, nearly blinding him. She paused, blinked, rubbed her eyes, blinked again, before she gasped, "Ajax!"

She lunged forwards, wrapping her arms tightly around him. She peppered his face with kisses, running her hand through his dirty, matted hair, rubbing her thumb against his cheek gently, whispering into his ear, before turning around to shout something at the person behind her.

But Ajax couldn't hear a word she had said, couldn't hear a word that his mother had said.

"Yes!" Xingqiu cheered.

His mother.

She was hugging him.

He was finally back home.

When had his hand moved on its own, reaching out for his weapon?Why was his hand wrapped around the hilt of his shortsword? Why did he want to unsheathe his weapon?

Why did he want to kill her? His own mother?

Xiao winced, and closed his eyes. He's been in his fair share of battles and wars, and he was no stranger to trauma, his innocence ripped away from him during his enslavement. Even after being freed, he was constantly hungry and tired, unable to stomach anything other than Almond Tofu, his body rejecting anything he had swallowed despite needing it to recover.

Plagued with nightmares, karmic chains of his past misdeeds and evil misdemeanors, he couldn't remember how many times he's nearly slaughtered Ganyu, Cloud Retainer, Mountain Shaper, Madame Ping, or even Rex Lapis, purely on instinct from feeling someone, something behind him, in fear that his inaction would result in his demise.

He nearly stabbed Chubby too, once, when Madame Ping had just gifted him a small teapot realm, hoping that if he couldn't find a place to his liking, to settle down and rest, then he could make one from scratch, like a bird building a nest, and the Teapot Spirit had materialized in front of him when Xiao idly asked aloud on how to work the teapot.

His hands shook, his arm trembling, as he tried to force himself to release his hold on his weapon. His hand refused to cooperate, clenching the hilt even tighter, as Ajax screamed at himself internal, yelling inside his own mind that, no, he didn't want to kill his mother. She wasn't a threat to him, wasn't a threat to his survival. She wouldn't hurt him, would never hurt him.

So why couldn't he just let go of his weapon!?

"Instincts are hard to ignore, especially those cultivated down in the depths." Venti muttered.

"Ajax!" His older sister popped out of the darkness, another lantern in her hands, "Oh, praise the benevolence of the Tsaritsa!"

"Don't praise her, she didn't do anything." Kaeya grumbled, "Praise Skirk for teaching him, or praise Childe foractuallyfighting his way through physical and mental hell to get home."

"We finally found him..." His sister heaved a sigh of relief, peeling off her jacket and draping it over Ajax,casually sweeping his hand off his sword in the process,"Come on, let's go home, today is particularly cold, you'll need more than just your two coats."

Huh. It was cold? Ajax could hardly feel it, not while his veins felt like they were on fire, burning him from the inside out. He felt tired, sick, like he could throw up any moment, as his mother and sister immediately started dragging him back home.

But Ajax didn't survive for so long just to collapse into the snow, so he continued on, forcing one foot in front of him, then the other, letting his mother and sister lead him forwards, until finally, the road was cleared of snow, lit up by a dingy lantern that could be snuffed out by a weak breeze, and his mother walked up to the house that was by the end of the road.

"Yes! A house! He can finally take a break!" Hutao cheered, hugging Qiqi excitedly.

"House?" The zombie murmured, "Houses. Safe."

He could hear footsteps echoing inside his house, feet padded by several layers of socks, walking around on the carpeted floor. He could hear the wood in the fireplace crackling, and someone tossing another new, fresh log into the flames.

Ajax stepped onto his porch, as his mother fumbled for the keys, and the wooden planks beneath him creaked under his weight. He immediately froze, tensing up. He hadn't meant to make any noise, to alert anything to his presence.

He heard metal clinking against metal as the door was unlocked, and the wooden door open, the creaky hinges screeching like a dying breaths of a dying bird.

His mother quickly ushered him into the house, closing the door behind his sister. Ajax flinched when the door slammed shut, metal clicking shut as the door was locked, trapping him inside the house.

"You're finally home, back safe and sound!" His mother cried, finally getting a good look at her son that had ran away and went missing, "You must have been so scared, all alone on your own!"

"Mama?"

The voice surprised Ajax, who automatically went for his weapon once more, before noticing his older brother,who had apparently just been standing by the fireplace the entire time, stunned at his appearance.

" And... Is that Ajax?"

The boy swallowed his saliva nervously. He recognized their voices, he knew who they were, he trusted his family.

So why was he still going for his weapon?

Tartaglia tightened his grasp on Zhongli's tail.

Sensing his anguish, Zhongli wrapped his arms around the Snezhnayan, resting his chin against his shoulder and nuzzling him gently, like an affectionate dragon. Tartaglia relaxed slightly, still clinging to Zhongli's tail, and the dragon flicked the plumes in the Harbinger's face.

Ajax trembled, forcing himself to release his sword despite every part of him screaming for blood. He didn't want to hurt his family, he didn't want to hurt anyone, they wouldn't hurt him, wouldn't kill him-

"Are you injured? Does anything hurt?" His motherfinally seemed to notice him shaking, for all the wrong reasons. Patting him down and examining his bloody coats as she unhooked the weapon sheath from his belt, she asked quietly, "Are you alright?The wolves didn't get to you, right? We were all so worried about you when we woke up and you were missing, and-"

"Wolves...totally..." Aether tried to let out a dry, sarcastic laugh, though it sounded more like he was choking on his own tongue, "If onlythatwas all he had to deal with..."

Ajax tuned out his mother's ramblings when he heard more footsteps, lighter, softer this time, a younger person, maybe a girl, perhaps, with how dainty the footsteps sounded.

"Too noisy..." Tonia appeared by the doorway leading to her bedroom, clutching his narwhale plush and rubbing her eyes, having been woken up by their mother's excited shouts, "What's going..."

"She's so cute!" Hutao cooed, "That's it, Tardigrade, I demand to meet your siblings!"

Tartaglia cracked a small, sad smile. He'd love to baby his siblings and show them off to everyone... let Tonia, Anthon and Teucer run wild in Liyue, hanging out with Qiqi, making friends with Little Meng and Little Fei and Little Lulu, eating Xiangling's delicious cooking, playing pranks with Hutao and Xingqiu, going on wild ghost chases with Chongyun, listening to Xinyan's music and watching Yunjin's opera with Zhongli...

How nice that would be.Toonice, in fact. Thoughts like that should only exist in dreams, because for a weapon like him, who's meant to be used and thrown away once he's served his purpose, dreams were nothing but mental hindrances, emotional baggage that weighed him down.

She blinked, noticing her mother tugging Ajax's coats off his exhausted frame, before she squealed, dropping his narwhale and running up to him, wrapping her arms around his stomach, ignoring the bloody splotches that decorated his undershirt, "Старший брат!You came back! You've been gone for three days and-"

"... Wait... what?" Eula blinked, utterly stunned by what was going on that she forgot all about her aristocratic etiquette, "That has to be a mistake. There is no way he only spentthree daysdown there!"

Jean winced. She wasn't a parent, but she could already tell how the different perception of time would create a rift between Tartaglia and his family. The boy had spent two, perhaps three, months down in the Abyss, fending for himself, desperately trying to find a way to get back home, and yet, to the rest of his family, the boy had gone missing for merely three days.

Ajax's brain immediately short-circuited, and he froze.

Three days?

Three days?

There was no way he only spent three days down in that hellhole, slaughtering everything he laid his eyes on, anything that laid eyes on him, for if they weren't dead, then they were a threat to his survival, and he would be the one who would never see the light of day again.

There was no way he only spent three days choking down putrid water, filled with the rotten flesh and bones of fallen monsters,carcasses floating downstream, further into the heart of the Abyss, where all hopes and dreams, ambitions and delusions, fantasy and reality, were destroyed, shattered into nothingness.

Skirk herself had been tailing him for a week out of curiosity, there was no way he had only been gone for three days...right?

Zhongli growled under his breath. It may not have been intentional, but the boy's mother was making Tartaglia question himself, question his own sanity, question his own reality. The Abyss had already messed with his head, he didn't need even more pressure from his family.

"You seem thinner. Oh, my poor child, how you have suffered all this time." His mother fussed over him, ordering Tonia to get him some fresh set of warm clothes, "You must be hungry, we've been saving meals for you, in case you came home; we hadborscht for dinner, courtesy of your oldest brother, he managed to get fresh beets at the market, and there was discounted beef today, such a rare treat, and..."

His brother finally seemed to snap out of his trance of finally finding his missing younger brother, and with a quick hug and a gently hair ruffle, he rushed into the kitchen toheat up the leftover borscht.

His mother continued, " Oh, you should have a nice, warm shower too, and-"

Everything suddenly just crashed into him like a tidal wave, hard hitting and fast, sweeping him off balance and giving him absolutely no chances to regain his bearings, leaving him floundering and lost in his sea of thoughts, before he eventually drowned himself in self-doubt and insanity.

Like a puppet who had its strings cut, Ajax's legs gave way under him, and he collapsed to his knees, choking on nothing as he attempted to get his words out, to say that no, he hadn't just been gone for three days, that he's faced far worse than some measly wolves looking for a easy meal, that he's tainted and that his mother should probably not touch him, lest he taint her with the darkness from below.

"You must have been so scared... my boy... everything will be alright..." His mother cooed, carefully, gently rubbing the dried, frozen blood off his face with a towel soaked in warm water, "You're home, safe now. Don't go running away anymore, okay,сын?"

Ajax reached out for her, his hand shaking so violently, if he were a piece of fragile porcelain, he would have already shattered into a million smithereens.

Not that he wasn't already shattered, broken inside.

Zhongli gripped onto the Harbinger, nuzzling him gently.

"You're not broken, okay?" The god whispered quietly, "Please, think more highly of yourself."

He had been scared. So, so scared. Scared for his life, scared he would die, scared he would never see his family again.

But nothing will be alright, never again. His heart was pounding in fear, for his weapon lay on the ground, just out of reach. His Vision had been in his coat pocket, but the article of clothing was draped over a chair on the other side of the room, right where his mother had left it before she had gone to fetch a towel just moments prior.

This wasn't home. Home was supposed to be safe. But Ajax felt on edge, like everything around him could kill him. It was too quiet, everything was too soft and gentle. The familiar sounds of howls and screeches, of growls and crackling, weren't there anymore. E verything was too different, too bright, too warm.

He didn't know what to do, he didn't feel safe, so this must not be home.

" You are nothing; not even a drop of water in the ocean."

Weaponless, powerless...

He never wanted to feel so weak ever again.

He was guided into the toilet, going through the motions of scrubbing himself down as his hands shook , the used sponge feeling awkward, unfamiliar to his hands, as he ran it down his body, the sponge scraping against ugly, brown, barely-healed scars that littered his skin like snow on an ice mountain.

Scars that weren't there when he had first embarked on his journey and sneaking out of the house; scars that would definitely take far longer than a mere three days to heal.

He pulled on his worn pajamas, but even after the shower, he didn't feel cold. He felt empty, hollow, he felt nothing, like his heart had been snatched out of his body.

"So what if you get out of the Abyss? No matter what happens, you will die here, for you have already died."

"And Paimon says, don't listen to the nonsense the pit spouts!" Paimon screeched angrily, "Childe already got out, leave him alone!"

Once again, with nothing to occupy his thoughts, as his mother sat him down by the dinner table, his brother ladling a reheated bowl ofborscht for him, his thoughts wandered once again .

"If the ship of Theseus were kept in a harbor and every part on the ship were replaced one at a time, would it then be a new ship?"

In the past, a younger Ajax would have easily said that of course it was still the same ship, even if he couldn't really explain his thought process. Now... perhaps he had a different answer, a tragic answer.

After all, the parts of the ship had to replaced because they were worn, they were weak, they were broken.

Because they weren't good enough.

Ifevery part on the ship were replaced one at a time, it would be a new ship, for the old ship was not good enough, not strong enough. For the old ship was broken, unneeded, unwanted, and that was why it had to be replaced by something better, something stronger.

Ajax scooped up a spoonful of warmborscht and put it into his mouth.

It tasted cold, dead, lifeless, like the sludge in that river. Neither sour, nor sweet. The boiled meat felt like chunks of flesh, dead humans who had sunk into the depths of the river. He chewed on the vegetables, he drank the soup, but there were n o sparks of color, no rushes of warmth filling his body.

Just the cold of the darkness that could never be shut out, no matter how many layers he wore.

The fireplace crackled, casting shadows on the walls from everything in the room; the table, the chairs, his mother, who was wrapping him up with blankets, his older sister, who had fetched him an old cotton jumper in fear that he was still cold, his brother, who sat next to him, looking at his little brother fondly, Tonia, who had settled down on the couch with his narwhale plush, falling asleep yet shaking herself awake every other minute .

Shadows that creeped up the walls, flickering in the unstable light, almost like they were reaching out for him, to pull him back into the dark.

Ajax nearly choked on hisborscht. He felt like the entity from his dream was closing its hands around his throat once again, cacking at his misery.

His mother led him to his bed, which was usually shared with Tonia and Anthon, but his older sister offered to take them, to give him some space to recover. She gently picked up a sleeping Anthon, and led Tonia out, who was still clutching his narwhale plush. His mother kissed him on the forehead, tucking him in tightly and giving him extra blankets, before telling him goodnight and closing his bedroom door.

And once again, he was plunged back into darkness.

Chapter 20: Slipping through the cracks

Chapter Text

Tartaglia idly played with the plumes of Zhongli's tail, as he let out a tired sigh. He didn't want to go through everything again; it already hurt the first time, being shunned by his parents and older siblings, trying to keep him away from his younger siblings in case he influenced them.

Now, without the naivety and innocence (not that he had any, not after the Abyss) of a fourteen year old who knew nothing other than pain and suffering, who didn't understand what was going on at the time, Tartaglia was sure it was going to hurt a lot more.

But he had no one before; not his family, not the Fatui, and certainly no friends.

And now, he had Zhongli.

Despite the fatigue seeping through his entire being, Ajax couldn't fall asleep. He couldn't believe that this was real, that he got out of the Abyss, that he made it home... and some small part of him can't help but feel that this was fake, that he was dreaming, that the Abyss was just showing him what he wanted to see, that he was gullible and naive enough to believe that he really was home.

So he decided to wake up at the crack of dawn, reheating the leftover borscht and scooping a bowl for himself. He settled down by the dining table, all on his own, left to his thoughts.

The borscht tasted like nothing but ashes and dirt against his tongue, but he continued shoveling his food in his mouth robotically, his entire body shaking as phantom aches and pain shot through his being.

Wooden floorboards creaked, and Ajax paused, snapping to attention, trying to figure out what was going on.

"Who's there?" Keqing asked warily.

Then, his father's head peeked out of the doorframe.

Everyone heaved a sigh of relief.

"Morning, Ajax." His father murmured, making his way towards the kitchen, before he paused. He stared at the boy, who blinked back at him, still eating his borscht, before he rushed forwards, wrapping his arms around his son.

"Ajax! You came home!" He gave Ajax a huge bear hug, "Your mother told me that you came back… but I thought I was dreaming."

"Hi." Ajax replied awkwardly, emotionlessly, letting his father pat his head, "I reheated yesterday's borscht."

"You're up early; you should rest more." His father commented, grabbing himself a bowl of borscht before sitting down next to his son to eat, "You worried us all, boy; three days out by yourself. And in this weather? You should be happy to be alive."

"Yeah." Ajax replied emotionlessly, "I know. I'm sorry, Papa."

He didn't even know what he was apologizing for? Running away and falling into the Abyss?

All he knew that was he was fixating on his father's last statement.

"You should be happy to be alive, boy." The Abyss had said.

"You should be happy to be alive." Skirk had reaffirmed.

And now, his father had said the very same statement.

"Oh...oh..." Ei muttered, realizing just how bad the situation had become, and it took less than a minute for everyone to reach the same conclusion.

For the boy wouldn't listen to the Abyss, or even Skirk.

But his father? At his age, who wouldn't listen to their father, wouldn't believe every single word he said, especially coming out of as a traumatic an experience as the Abyss, where no one and nothing could be trusted?

The boy was, understandably, latching on to any support he could find.

His heart pounded.

If he should be happy for being alive, and he was only alive for being in dangerous, perilous battles, besting various foes in a fight to the death... then logically, did that mean he should enjoy the battles he fought?

His hand twitched, and he nearly dropped his spoon.

He knew he couldn't trust whatever the Abyss said, words being purposefully chosen to mess with his mind, to make him give up, to give in, to let the darkness consume him. He trusted Skirk, but she had made it clear that she was fully infected with Abyssal darkness, and that perhaps those on the surface wouldn't accept her.

But his father… he could trust his father, right?

Suddenly, Ajax felt like he couldn't breathe, like he was drowning in the murky, miasmic river like everything else that had died in there, like he himself had died in that river, drowning in his own blood.

Somewhere in his teenaged mind, gears started turning. He should revel in the carnage, in his fights against otherworldly monsters, in all of his victories. He should enjoy spilling the blood of his enemies, of those who wanted to oppose him, of those who wanted to kill him,consume him, break him, take over his mind.

"For Bosacius, perhaps dying in the heat of a great battle was no tragedy." Xiao had shaken his head, "And perhaps the same is true for me. After living for so long... to die in the act of saving others would not have been a terrible thing."

"I think you know that that isn't true." Aether had reached out to grab his hand tightly, like if he didn't, the Yaksha would disappear, falling into the darkness by himself, resigning himself to his fate.

"Mm. So maybe... these thoughts are my own form of insanity."

Xiao closed his eyes. He's been alive for so long, and he was no stranger to karma. To Tartaglia, or rather, Ajax, a teenaged mortal trying to make sense of forces beyond his comprehension, trying to put himself back together after the Abyss thoroughly ripped him to shreds...

His thirst for blood, his lust for battle, perhaps it was his form of insanity.

"Ajax?" His father noticed that he was breathing heavily, and he immediately tried to help, "Are you alright? Does anywhere hurt?"

He wasn't happy, but he should be happy, and so he'll learn to be happy to be alive, to be strong, to continue growing stronger, stronger, and stronger still; nothing was stagnant, and neither the Heavens of Teyvat nor the godswould stop to consider his feelings about anything.

And being scared of them wouldn't help. After all, they were the ones to weave his tragic fate from the very start; if they wanted Ajax to suffer, then Ajax was going to fight them for control over his life. Because following his fate wasn't truly living, it was merely being manipulated like a mindless, dead puppet.

Zhongli winced. No wonder Tartaglia hated manipulation so much; he felt like his entire life was a toy, a joke to Celestia. Even if it was for his nation, even if he hadn't truly lied to Tartaglia, either changing the topic or shying away from the truth, he has still hurt him in such a terrible way, and Zhongli couldn't forgive himself for that.

He refused to let the Abyss consume his mind, he crawled his way out of that hellhole, and there was no way he was going to let some stupid Heavenly Principles dictate how he lived his life.

Ajax felt like he was being boiled alive, his blood wriggling uncomfortably beneath his skin, like it had a life of its own, separate from his corruption riddled husk of a body.

" Isn't it nice to be strong? To be alive?"

For once, Ajax felt like he could agree with the Abyss. He wanted to be alive, and if he wanted to live, then he had to be strong. And if the world out there was really so massive, and Teyvat really was nothing than a "ship in a bottle", then all the more he had to grow stronger.

To grow stronger, to break free of the mortal shackles that were holding him back, that were holding everyone back, shackles that would bring about their demise simply because they were too weak.

He was tired of being scared, of fearing everything, of being helpless and weak. If he wasn't strong,wasn't strong enough, then he was weak. The weak die, and the strong die too, for there was always something, someone else stronger.

"Oh..." Zhongli murmured, as suddenly, everything clicked into place; Tartaglia's burning ambition, his fervent lust for battle and carnage, forvictory, driven by the darkness that consumed his heart, by all the pain, anger, suffering, frustration he'd endured down in the depths.

Driven by the want, the need tosurvive.

Zhongli wrapped his arms around Tartaglia tightly. He could hear, feel his heart pounding, and he let out the smallest of whimpers. He understood his friend's ambitions, but until now, he really did not know how far it went, did not realize that without a support network, it had driven him to borderline insanity.

"Do not reject the darkness, your ambitions will swallow you whole."

He wanted to be stronger that everything, stronger than his peers, stronger than the monsters that roamed the surface and beneath the surface, stronger than the gods themselves, and even the Heavens that dictated his fate; his ambitions better be large, if even the Abyss itself, the darkness that lurked everywhere and nowhere, ancient even when time first began to flow, had to call him out for it.

"Knowing that y our strengths are your weaknesses, and it's only a matter of time before you implode from your ambition andstubbornness?"

He wanted to be the strongest, so that nothing could hurt him ever again, save for himself.

"Ajax?" His father shook him gently, worry furrowing at his brow, as Ajax continued shuddering, wincing and curling in on himself, nearly spilling his borscht had his father not taken his bowl away from him, his short breathes coming in and out rapidly, like he was suffering some kind of mental breakdown.

Because in a way, it was.

The Abyss had broken him beyond belief, shattered him into so many pieces, and he was far too broken to even realize it.

Until it was too late.

Like a broken glass; no matter how hard one tried, they would never be able to put the glass back together. There would always be a piece or two missing, miniscule glass shards that were too tiny to see, to find, but resulted giant, obvious holes once the glass was reassembled, a glaring reminder of what had been lost.

And even if none of the pieces went missing, the cracks were still there, forever the weakest link. The glass may be usable, but put too much pressure on one place, and the glass would shatter once more.

"I'm fine…" Ajax finally managed to compose himself, but his body still felt so numb, so cold, so very muchdead. He took another mouthful of borscht in one last attempt to warm himself up.

It tasted hard and empty and cold, just like broken glass shards, like the broken hopes and dreams of everyone that the Abyss had consumed.

Just like the soul of Ajax that had been crushed by the darkness, leaving his shattered spirit to pick up the pieces.

Chapter 21: This sorrow takes a hold

Chapter Text

"That's just... terrible..." Ayaka murmured.

She didn't dislike the Harbinger too much, not after Aether had vouched for him personally, and after learning that he hated blatant manipulation, much like what had occurred in Inazuma before Ei retracted the Vision Hunt Decree, she was much more willing to exchange information with Tartaglia that would benefit them both, especially with regards to the Mystic Onmyou Chamber and the rogue Harbinger.

But now, seeing everything that he was going through, she couldn't help but feel sorry for him, despite being fully aware he was probably far stronger than her in terms of skills and power. No one should have to go through that alone, and the severe disconnect between him and his family's understanding of the situation was definitely not helping things at all.

Sitting still, trapped within the confines of his house (It wasn't a home. It couldn't be a home, not with how out of place Ajax felt), the boy felt… nothing. There was nothing to do, nothing to kill, no battles to win, and if there were to battles, no proof that he was alive, no proof that he was improving, then what was the point?

A meaningless existence, a ghost of his former self. And eventually, even spirits had to be laid to rest.

It was almost like someone had put a muted, greyscale, monochrome filter over his eyes; everything looked grey, anddrab, and dull, like the life had been sucked out of everything, sucked out of him, leaving him black, cold,dead.

With nothing to do, alone with his thoughts, everything seemed to be amplified tenfold. The emptiness of the house, the darkness of the shadows, the voices in his head, screaming at him in an ancient language for running away from the Abyss, for being weak and helpless and absolutely useless, worthless.

Zhongli tightened his grip on the young Snezhnayan, resting his chin on Tartaglia's shoulder and letting out a quiet, comforting draconic purr.

So when his father sensed his restlessness and offering to bring him out ice fishing, Ajax jumped at the opportunity to escape from the prison of his own mind, at the chance to finally do something, desperate for some normality.

And for the first time since Ajax ever started going fishing with his father, he took the knife from his father's hands, without even being prompted, expertly slashing through the ice with the finely-honed precision of an experienced killer, a far cry from his usual meek self that shied away from the sharp point of the blade.

His father seemed disturbed by his sudden change of tune, and try as he might, he didn't do a very good job of hiding it, not with the way his brows furrowed in confusion and his muscles in tensed warily at his son, who just three days ago, could barely bring himself to slash the head off a training dummy, and perhaps in fear and trepidation when Ajax turned towards him, knife held tightly in his grasp like a child holding on to a newly acquired balloon at a festival.

Ajax suddenly turned towards him, brandishing the knife in his direction, and his entire body tensed up, muscles locking up as the edge of the knife reflected the first rays of light from the rising sun.

The boy could hear his father's heart pounding, could see his eyes widening in fear, his hands shaking from the cold, the surprise, the fear.

Is he going to hurt me? Stab me? What happened to you, сын?Ajax could almost hear, spoken in his father's voice, purely from observing his facial expressions, his body posture, every twitch of his muscles.

Ajax could hear the blood roaring in his ears. How could his father ever feel that he would hurt him? He could never hurt his family, couldn't even think of doing such a terrible, heinous act.

His eyes trailed towards the knife in his hands, the metal glinting at him ominously.

And he remembered seeing his mother in the forest just a few days ago, her lunging in for a hug, and his hands instinctively straying towards his weapon.

His broken soul cracked even further.

Diluc's heart throbbed, and he nearly chocked on his own saliva.

Several years ago, before he unrepairably shattered his relationship with Kaeya, he felt the exact same way. The brother he had grown up with, the only family he had left after he was forced to end his father's suffering. The pain in his chest as he raised his claymore, fear flashing through Kaeya's icy orbs after he revealed that he was from Khaenri'ah.

He couldn't help but just feel terrible.

"Hey. I don't blame you for what you did." He felt a grip on his wrist. Upon looking up, he found Kaeya looking at him softly like snow, instead of his usual sly, icy sharp gaze, "We can talk about it later, okay?"

Lowering his gaze, Diluc nodded, as Kaeya smiled back at him.

His father deflated, heaving a sigh of relief when he finally realized that Ajax was holding the knife out to him; not to hurt him, but for him to keep so they could start fishing.

He thought he did a good job at hiding his reaction, gingerly taking the knife from his son's hands, as Ajax moved to fetch his fishing pole, gripping it tightly like he might hold a polearm or a lance, instead of a harmless fishing rod.

He might have fooled his son, before he had fallen into the pit, before his soul had been so brutally devoured by the spirit of the depths. He might have fooled the meek, quiet, gentle son of a poor fisherman, the boy who couldn't hurt anyone even if he tried.

But he couldn't fool him now, not with his finely-honed senses, trained to detect the slightest of movements from a mile away. Not after he had spent three months suffering, scared for his life, desperate to survive, killing everything and anything in his path before they killed him.

Ajax had seen his reaction, could hear his thoughts.

He merely chose not to react to it.

Eula huffed, and crossed her arms. Even after being accepted into the Knights of Favonius, the dirty looks the townsfolk of Mondstadt never really went away, not until Amber pretty much shoved her way into her life, pushing all the negativity away from the denounced child of the Lawrence Clan.

She understood how corrupt her family had been, being old enough to take care of herself, and didn't mind cutting ties with them, especially not after how they mistreated the maids and servants, who were more of a family to her than her blood relatives.

But for a innocent, traumatized fourteen year old... who's entire life revolved around his family before being plunged into absolute darkness... only for his own family to start shunning him, Eula couldn't imagine how it would feel to be in that situation.

The father and son settled down, casting their fishing lines into th e hole within the ice, waiting for the fish to bite.

But Ajax could not ignore the feeling of his blood wiggling beneath his skin, a mortal disguise for a monster of the Abyss, a wolf in sheep's clothing.

"No matter what happens, you will die here, for you have already died."

He used to love ice fishing, waiting patiently for fish to take the bait, listening to his father tell stories, but he never did realize just how boring it was, not until now.

"The gods never saved you. They abandoned you, left you to die, and yet you chose to return, placing your life back in their accursed hands."

Sitting still, waiting for the prey to come to him instead of actively hunting them down... Ajax could not understand how he could ever enjoy such a dull activity.

Not when his body felt like it was going to burst, his heart hammering within his chest, threatening to burst out of his ribcage. Not when the abyssal taint had already infected his heart and mind like a parasite, playing with his desires, turning everything into nothing, draining the humanity from his body like it did with the life from his eyes.

"Without us, you are nothing. And now, your tainted soul burns in your sins. You have irked the ire of the Heavens, and the gods will not spare you."

The boy stood up in frustration as he tried to ignore the voice crooning in his ear, tried to ignore the black spots dancing around in his vision. He felt like he was being suffocated once again by some phantom force, sharp nails clawing his eyes out once more.

"Come back, dear child. Come back to the Abyss, and return to where you belong."

He felt like whacking something with his fishing rod. He wanted to hit something, to kill something, to take his mind off the offending presence lingering in the dark recesses of his mind, pulling the strings that were so obviously manipulating him like a puppet.

"You cannot run away, boy, not from yourself."

"Ajax! Sit down! You'll scare the fish away!" His father chastised, reaching out to tug him back down, but Ajax just shook his hand off, clenching his fists in frustration, "It's boring. I don't want to do this anymore."

"But you love ice fishing! You love listening to stories... patiently waiting for fish to bite." His father weakly argued, abandoning their fishing hole, "This was your favorite thing to do... Ajax... what happened to you?"

What is wrong with you?remained unsaid.

"Oohhh... ouch..." Kaeya winced at the hurtful statement, but Diluc shut him up before he could continue with a light, gentle punch to the shoulder.

Ajax did not want to answer that question, nor did he know the answer.

Luckily, he didn't have to answer, when a man ran up to the edge of the lake, waving his arms around wildly, "It's not safe! Hilichurls!"

"Seriously? Just hilichurls?" Xingqiu raised an eyebrow, immediately breaking the tension.

"Hilichurls?" Ajax immediately perked up, but his father stood in front of him protectively. The boy barely recognized the man, only knowing that he lived right next door, and had a son that was recruited into the Fatui when he turned eighteen.

"What's going on?" His father asked, "Hilichurls? Don't they usually stay further up on the mountains?"

"Yes; as long as we keep our distance, they leave us alone. Now they're storming the village! We're trying to hold them off... but they're huge! I need to contact my son! We need to get the Fatui's help, right now!"

His father nodded, "Let's go. Ajax, leave the gear and get back home. Stay out of danger. Warn your older siblings if they are home; they'd have better judgement while I'm out."

He clapped Ajax on the shoulder gently, "Protect them, and keep them safe. You'll do that for me, okay, Ajax?"

Ajax nodded resolutely, and with that, his father left with their neighbor, leaving Ajax alone. Heeding his father's words, Ajax raced back home, doing his best to ignore the sounds of fighting in the background.

But something inside gnawed at him, urging him to go to the origin of the battle cries and the clashing of steel.

Well, his father did say to warn his older siblings, but "Hilichurls" was such a vague statement that surely no one could make heads or tails of that. Taking a look wouldn't hurt, especially if it allowed Ajax and his family to know exactly what they were going up against... right?

And Ajax found his feet moving on their own, directly towards the fight.

"I... it's dangerous" Barbara paused, "I mean... he isn't wrong... but still..."

He couldn't help but watch as several men, armed with flimsy swords, ice picks, axes, and various other tools, trying to push back the wave of Hilichurls. Armed with Cryo slimes, frosty shields and icy clubs, the Hilichurls seemed to be at a standstill with the regular folk of Morepesok, neither side able to do much damage to the other.

The ground started shaking, and Ajax heard a yell in the distance, "Mitachurls! Get down!"

"Mitachurls will be a huge problem, for non-Vision holders." Albedo commented, "Especially those with Cryo Shields."

True to his word, several Mitachurls were running towards them in the distance, brandishing gigantic icy shields, alongside several Cryo Samachurls.

"We can't hold them! When are the Fatui coming?"

"Soon, hopefully, the weather isn't too bad! It shouldn't take too long to pass the message!"

There were more screams as one of the Mitachurls slammed its shield into group, sending some men flying, and the others scattered, not wanting to be crushed like a bug.

Ajax's fingers twitched, and his heart pounded in excitement.

Finally, something worth fighting, something he could kill.

But then he paused.

"Stay out of danger."His father had said.

"Protect them, and keep them safe." His father had also said.

Surely, now, the best way to protect his family is to get rid of the threat right from the source? After all, Hilichurls couldn't raid the village and harm his family if they were all dead, reduced to nothing but broken masks and bones, right?

With his mind made up, Ajax made a mad dash towards the brewing battle, casually picking up a fallen ice pick off the ground, leaping over several downed bodies, vaulting over the ice shield, before slamming the ice pick directly into a Mitachurl's face.

Venti winced at the brutality of the teenager, even though he understood that the boy had been pent up, and needed an outlet, though the darkness that seeped into his veins was definitely playing a part in driving him insane.

With a surprised howl, the Mitachurl screeched in pain, flailing about wildly as its mask split apart beneath the blow, blood erupting from the wound. The boy pulled the ice pick, before shoving it deeper into the Mitachurl's face, and the creature finally disintegrated into nothingness, leaving behind a broken, cracked mask.

And suddenly, everything went silent. Ajax could feel the shocked, stunned looks of the villagers, staring at him in awe, in horror, in dread, that a fourteen year old boy had easily slaughtered one of the strongest enemies without even breaking a sweat.

The other side had also paused, undoubtedly enraged at the sudden death of their brethren, until the silence was broken by another villager, "Fool! Now they won't leave until we're all dead!"

"We won't make it, the Fatui won't make it in time!" Another yelled.

"Pray to her Majesty, the mighty Tsaritsa; pray that she will bestow her benevolence upon us, and save us from out impending doom!"

"And that isnothow you solve the problem." Sara deadpanned.

Ajax just snorted. He actually rolled his eyes, casually twirling the ice pick around as the villagers erupted into chaos, muttering prayers to the Cryo Archon, with injured men scattered around, blood dripping into the snow like red paint on a pristine canvas.

It was absolutely ridiculous, and Ajax had to hold in a laugh and just howpitifulthe sight was. But he supposed he couldn't blame them; they were more used to dealing with wolves and bears, and even they wouldn't pick a fight with the native Hilichurl tribes in Snezhnaya, and Mitachurls were way stronger than the average bear.

Ajax could feel the wind picking up, as the sun slowly set. The Hilichurls seemed to have gathered their wits, after the surprise of the villagers' sudden breakdown, and were advancing towards the village, weapons and shields in hand.

In the blink of an eye, another Hilichurl fell, disintegrating into ashes, as Ajax plunged his ice pick into its face. He wasn't going to let these creatures invade his village, even if the adults were too scared and pathetic to do anything.

And so Ajax lunged forwards, easily sweeping up a hunting knife from ground, dropped by a fallen villager, before jumping towards the hoard of Hilichurls.

"He's outnumbered." Gorou whimpered, but Kaeya just snorted, "He's Childe. You think a few Hilichurls will stop him?"

"Thanks for the vote of confidence." Tartaglia tried to sound as confident as he usually was, but his voice came out strained and weak, like he was trying not to cry.

The violence soothed his troubled soul, as he hacked, slashed, ripped his way through his enemies, his weapons bouncing harmlessly off those fortunate enough to hold Cryo shields but staggering them nonetheless.

The Hilichurls parted like a wave, now fully wary of the danger that the smallest, scrawniest human in the group posed, but that did nothing to deter Ajax, his lithe figure allowing him to narrowly dodge swipes and evade the wide berth of the Mitachurls swinging their shields.

Exhilaration rushed through his body like a breath of fresh air, carnage erupting from his hands as he forgo the ice pick and knife, the handles sticky with the blood and ash of fallen enemies, opting for another fallen knife and axe instead.

He couldn't help but admire the crimson that stained the snow, spreading like a dangerous infection, realizing that he could now see the bright, vibrant colors of the world that was lost to him all this time.

It wasbeautiful.

He didn't understand why he reveled in the pain as a lucky Hilichurl managed to shoot him in the arm with an arrow, and he ripped the bolt out, a wild, feral glint in his dull, dead eyes, before throwing the arrow back at the Hilichurl.

Aether raised an eyebrow, and turned to Tartaglia. He just shrugged weakly, and the Traveler rolled his eyes.

Of course the stupid Harbinger would think thatthrowingthe arrow was a good idea... not that it wasn't effective, though.

It hit dead on, right in the middle of its mask, and the Hilichurl screeched in pain as it tried to dislodge the arrow that was sticking out of its face like a unicorn. Ajax crashed through the Hilichurls and Mitachurls like tsunami, sweeping them off their feet, crushing them until nothing remained.

He could hear someone gleefully laughing, a happy, insane-sounding cackle, like the prospect of a fight was joyous occasion, something to be celebrated.

"Yes,"Something purred at the back of his mind,"This is how it feels to be alive."

Oh,he realized why he was enjoying this so much, as he wildly sliced off a Mitachurl's head after it charged at him recklessly, putting its shield down as it regained its balance.

He was so used to fighting in the Abyss, and the lack of latent Abyssal energy in the surroundings for his body to feed off of threw him off, but the burn of his muscles, his blood searing through his veins, the short, sharp breaths of frigid air stinging his lungs, the weakness and fatigue that was starting to show, but Ajax found that he didn't mind too much.

The pain that came with exertion, the injuries that came with battles, the sensations that rippled through his body like the strings of a lyre, playing a melodious tune, his heart pounding out the rhythm for his dance of death on a backdrop of bloodshed.

So this is what it felt like, to truly be alive.

Everything had felt so muted, so dead, the emptiness that was in his heart amplified by the darkness that festered deep within him like an infected wound. And Ajax finally opened his eyes and accepted the truth, thriving on the sensation of feeling something, anything, everything, the sensation of being alive.

And when he sliced down the very last Mitchurl, its body crashing into the ground and disintegrating among the field of the ashes of its brethren, Ajax realized that the one that was laughing was him.

"Ajax?"

The familiar voice startled him, and Ajax paused, turning towards the source of the sound.

"Oh no." Kokomi couldn't help but mutter. She could come up with thousands of responses that the Harbinger's father would give upon seeing what the boy had done, and none of them seemed good to her.

He found his father staring back at him, blinking emotionlessly, the neighbor openly gawking, and the Fatui agents that were dispatched glancing at the results of his carnageous rampage. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed all the adults look at him in horror, like he was the monster, like he was the one that had to be eliminated instead.

"Ajax… what…" His father forced out once more, glancing between him, the bloodied weapons in his hands, the pool of blood and ashes and death, before he managed to continue, "How… could you…"

The blood drained from his face, and Ajax's grip loosened, dropping the knife and axe into the snow with a muted thud.

"It seems like your problem has been solved, Papa." One of the Fatui agents spoke to the neighbor, "Don't worry about the clean-up. We'll deal with it, as well as fixing the damages…"

The neighbor's son walked over to Ajax, clapping him on the back, "Not bad, I didn't think you had it in you; you always were the meek one."

"Don't tease the poor boy." Another agent reprimanded, "Get home, you'd catch a cold standing out here with blood-soaked clothes. Blood stains don't wash out easily."

His ears were ringing as the Fatui spread out to fully assess the situation, and finally, his father walked up to him, steering him away from the crowd.

"We will talk about this." He rasped out weakly, unable to meet his eyes.

And as his heartbeat settled, everything suddenly looked so dull, so devoid of life once again.

Chapter 22: Maybe better off dead

Chapter Text

Aether nodded his head at Zhongli, before standing up.

"Let's take a break for lunch." Aether suggested, as Zhongli got the message and instantly dissipated his tail, resulting in a surprised squeak from Tartaglia.

Observing the pitiful looks the Harbinger was getting, it was clear that despite how bad the Fatui's reputation was, no one could really blame the boy for joining the organization, seeing how much he suffered, and knowing that in Snezhnaya, the Fatui were probably the best, and only solution Tartaglia had that even had proper knowledge of the Abyss, let alone helping him work through his trauma of what had happened.

Though it was very obvious that no one had helped the boy, leaving his pain to fester like an infected wound, eating away at his mind and body as Tartaglia tried his best to cope. After something as intense and taxing as the Abyss, it was no wonder that Tartaglia felt that his former home felt so dull and boring, especially after he got used to fighting for his life every other second.

It was a huge shock to his system, like splashing water onto someone to wake them up, except the boy was awake, existing in a living nightmare where he was the monster, not the victim.

Even Ei, having sufficiently recovered from the outburst she had the previous day, felt sorry for Tartaglia. Her friends and sister had passed, and although she wasn't completely certain about Chiyo's fate, she knew that her mind had been completely consumed by the Abyss, and was no more.

If she was expecting comfort and only received rejection, if her own friends and family shunned her and she couldn't understand the reason why... Ei didn't think she'd be able to take it.

Tartaglia didn't like the looks he was receiving. Normally he loved the attention, but he did not like being pitied. He loved the shocked, surprised, scared expressions of those who saw him fight, watching him perform on stage in theatres, or just simply conversing during public events.

Not the looks he was being given now. Sad, soft expressions, as if they felt bad for his suffering, as if he didn't deserve any of it. What happened had happened, and Ajax didn't want to waste his time thinking about what-ifs.

That was just looking for someone, something to blame for all his problems. And it was clear that the only person Tartaglia could blame was Ajax.

It was Ajax's fault for running away, Ajax's fault for not being strong enough, Ajax's fault for not being able to hide the truth from his family, Ajax's fault for letting the Cryo Archon and the Fatui manipulate him as they pleased.

Everything was Ajax's fault. That much was obvious.

"I'll be right on it!" Noelle shot to her feet, but Thoma stood up as well, "You can't possibly do all the work! Take a rest, I can cook lunch!"

Jean and Ayaka winced and shot each other apologetic glances as Noelle and Thoma discussed who would take on the task of cooking (Ayato, the traitor he was, was watching the argument while sipping on his boba tea, amusem*nt dancing in his gleaming blue eyes).

"Jeez, Paimon can't say she's ever seen people arguing over wanting to do chores..." Paimon muttered. As the duo argued in the background, Amber stalked up to Tartaglia, with Eula right behind her.

She gave the Harbinger a beaming smile, "Hey, you use a bow, right?"

"Me?" Tartaglia tilted his head slightly, confused that she was addressing him, "Yeah?"

Amber procured her Favonius Warbow out of nowhere, grinning, "Give me some tips! A Harbinger that uses a bow is bound to be able to do some real fancy stuff!"

Kaeya looked up from his staring contest with Diluc, and sweat dropped, "Amber, you'd be better off getting archery tips from an empty bottle of alcohol than Childe..."

"Don't be such a party pooper, Ehe!" Venti cheekily smirked, "Don't worry Amber, Childe and I can give you all the pointers you'd ever need!"

"Pointers on how to destroy your liver?" Zhongli asked sarcastically, but Venti stuck his tongue out childishly at the God of Contracts.

"Oh, archery tips?" Gorou's ears perked up, wagging his tail excitedly, "Please, count me in!"

"Well, I suppose it wouldn't hurt." Sara huffed, crossing her arms, "A chance to learn new skills and enhance my existing ones is always welcome."

"Well, then it's set." Aether clapped Noelle and Thoma on the back, a forced smile on his face, "Neither of you are going to cook, since you've been cooking for the past few meals. I'm sure we have more than enough people who can cook decently, even discounting those who want to go for archery practice."

Hutao and Ayato grinned at each other, and their hands shot into the air.

"Absolutely not! We all know how your food turns out!" Paimon screeched, "Who knows what kind of suspicious ingredients you'd put into the dishes! You'd give us all indigestion!"

Hutao and Ayato both snickered, as Xiao subtly nudged Ganyu towards the group of bow users, silently urging her to join them.

"No, I couldn't possibly fit in..." Ganyu shook her head, but Xiao just snorted, "They've got a tengu, a dog, a drunkard god, and a rabid Fatui Harbinger. I don't think that being a half-qilin Adeptus would be an issue."

Tartaglia shot a nervous grin at Zhongli, but the Prime Adeptus just smiled kindly at him, "It's alright. You should make more friends. Do you want me to be there as well?"

"Yeah… but…" Tartaglia leaned in to whisper in Zhongli's ear, "Aren't we going to overload the teapot? We have five archers… and if we count those who are cooking-"

"You know, I could do with your signature Slow-Cooked Bamboo Shoot Soup, Zhongli." Aether grinned in their direction, totally not trying to find an excuse to have Zhongli chaperone the Harbinger, "We usually never have time to make Bamboo Shoot Soup, and Zhongli's version of it is just the best!"

"Of course. Raw Meat sourced from a boar that has been killed only a mere half an hour before the cooking process is hard to find, and more often than not, it's easier to go out and source the meat myself. The ham has to be processed in a certain way, with a precise ratio of salt to meat, and smoked over a charcoal grill for approximately-" Zhongli was cut off as Venti yanked both him and Tartaglia to their feet, before making a beeline for the teapot, "See ya! I'll take care of this blockhead."

"You dare call me a blockhead when you are the one who is drunk most of the time?" Zhongli grumbled, while Tartaglia just laughed at all the chaos.

"Diluc and I can take over cooking today." Kaeya volunteered, "He makes a mean Pile 'Em Up, I can tell you that!"

"That's because I don't put alcohol in my dishes." Diluc huffed, without the usual heat behind his words.

"Yeah, go ahead." Aether nodded towards the teapot, as Paimon bugged him to make some Sticky Honey Roast, "I'll also be grilling things out here, no rush!"

"I'll get the Bamboo Shoot Soup cooking, and then I'll come join you, okay?" Zhongli quietly murmured, as Tartaglia grinned, "Okay!"

With that, Zhongli disappeared into the teapot mansion along with Diluc and Kaeya, letting Tartaglia lead the bow users towards the training grounds.

"So… you're close to Aether?" Amber asked curiously, "Not that I don't trust him, Aether's a great judge of character and he's a lot stronger than he looks… but didn't think he'd be that friendly with the Fatui… no offence… especially with what happened to our native Archon…"

Venti snickered under his breath, as Amber hastily continued, glancing at the former Archon, "Not that I know the details. I only overheard some rumours, that's all."

Gorou frowned at the reminder that Tartaglia was still a Fatui Harbinger, "The Fatui have caused a lot of problems for us in Inazuma. Especially for The Resistance."

"Don't even get me started about that." Sara shook her head, sighing, "I'm embarrassed to admit that my clan leader was even involved with you lot."

"Wait… what did the Fatui in Inazuma do?" Tartaglia blinked in confusion.

"You don't know?" Gorou and Sara chorused with accusatory tones, but the Harbinger just shrugged, "Hey, I was in Liyue most of the time. I thought the Fatui in Inazuma were under Arlecchino."

"He was in Liyue for a long time." Ganyu confirmed, "Even before the Vision Hunt Decree."

"Ah… okay… Well, you know how Inazuma had this Vision Hunt Decree, and we were trying to stop it." Gorou explained, lowering his tail and ears, "But both sides were being played by the Fatui in order to prologue the war."

"That's terrible." Amber exclaimed.

"But yeah… forgive us if we're still wary of you… even if you have been approved by Aether." Gorou sighed apologetically.

"Don't worry about it!" Tartaglia laughed, "Glad that my reputation precedes me! I must have done something right then!"

"You're a Harbinger. That's enough of a reputation." Venti grumbled, clearly still sour about the fact that Signora had brutally assaulted him and ripped his Gnosis directly out of his chest.

Somehow, all of them had unanimously agreed to not talk about whatever they had seen about Tartaglia's past, even if they hadn't discussed it, and the Harbinger was grateful for that.

They were also ignoring the fact that Ei had just outed Venti as the Anemo Archon, but that just made things majorly awkward, and Tartaglia had a feeling that they were also trying to ignore that as well.

Not that the bard seemed to care anyways. He seemed to like parading around as a regular mortal instead of the Archon that blew mountains away, just like a certain amber-eyed consultant he knew that somehow always forgot his wallet.

"Alright! The training grounds!" Tartaglia proclaimed, immediately rushing over to set up some targets.

"Oh! Me first!" Venti squealed, immediately nocking an arrow and destroying three targets at once as his powers created two additional Anemo arrows.

Sara raised an eyebrow, before firing off a flurry of arrows in quick succession, each arrow nailing the bullseye.

She finished her showcase, and glanced at Gorou competitively, "Your turn."

Gorou growled, and stepped up, firing off his own flurry of arrows as he crouched on the ground, all of them making their mark and hitting the bullseye of the targets.

Amber whistled appreciatively, as Venti gently nudged Ganyu forward for her turn. Shyly, the half-qilin stepped forwards, before charging up a Frostflake Arrow and destroying a bunch of targets.

"Man, I don't think I can compete…" Amber sighed, before perking up, "But that just means there's more for me to learn!"

"That's the spirit!" Tartaglia clapped her on the back, "Go for it!"

Amber fired off her own arrows, being slightly slower than Gorou and Sara, but still equally accurate.

"Your turn." The Pyro user grinned up at the Harbinger, and Tartaglia swiftly summoned his bow.

"Man, Thoma was right. Your stance sucks. You're too relaxed." Venti commented, as the Harbinger fired off his arrows, and much to the shock of the other archers, Tartaglia summoned another arrow and threw it at the target, shattering it instantly.

"YOU CAN'T JUST THROW ARROWS!" Ganyu exclaimed incredulously; not once in her entire life has she seen someone throwing an arrow with their bow, "That's not… You can't just..."

She trailed off, unable to find the words to finish her sentence, as Tartaglia admitted, "I'm the least adept with a bow."

"There is "being bad with a bow", and then there is "completely misusing your weapon"." Gorou grumbled.

"Hey, that is precisely why I must master it! Plus, if I can hit stuff with it, that is a win!" Tartaglia huffed.

"And I can use a knife and beat someone over the head with it instead of stabbing someone with it." Sara sighed, "We are so going to fix your form."

"Hey, I'm a Harbinger! You guys are supposed to hate me, not help me!" Tartaglia countered.

"Well, your stance still sucks, Harbinger or not." Amber stuck her tongue out at him.

"She isn't wrong." A familiar voice rang out, and everyone turned, just noticing the former Geo Archon walking towards them.

"Ah… my lord-… I mean, Zhongli! How long have you been watching us?" Ganyu asked.

"Long enough to know that Childe's a complete disgrace to the Art of Archery." Zhongli shook his head in amusem*nt.

"Rude! And Xiansheng, You've seen me fight before!"

"You do seem to prefer your Hydro weaponry rather than your bow, though that isn't surprising given that you are much more in tune with your Vision, and that the elasticity and tension of a bow cannot be mimicked by Hydro." Zhongli stated, "Get into your shooting stance again."

Tartaglia did exactly as he was told, and the others started commenting.

"Your torso should be straight."

"Your shoulders should be aligned with your hips and feet."

"Don't tilt your bow so much, that just throws off your aim. How you can even hit anything like that is beyond me."

"Gorou and I shoot with the bow in the horizontal position, but for you, you should anchor the bowstring somewhere along your chin."

"You guys are just bullying me at this point." Tartaglia huffed, trying to adjust his stance according to all the comments, twitching at how uncomfortable he felt with his improved stance (not that he would consider it an improvement, given how uncomfy it was. How was he supposed to fight like this?)

"Wow. We are bullying a famed Fatui Harbinger." Venti deadpanned, before dissolving into uncontrollable giggles.

"If you're done making fun of him, I'll be actually teaching him how to hold his bow." Zhongli grumbled, "You can go check on my soup to make sure it's not overflowing."

"Okay! Have fun, guys!" Venti chirped, skipping off towards the teapot mansion.

"Get into your stance again." Zhongli ordered, and Tartaglia obliged, letting Zhongli adjust his posture until Ganyu, Sara, Gorou and Amber were satisfied.

And Tartaglia had to admit, with Zhongli adjusting his posture for him, he really understood what the others were talking about. This was way more comfortable.

"That's much better." Amber nodded, as Tartaglia easily shattered another target with a well-aimed arrow, "You've definitely got the strength to use a bow with stronger tension, and once you've got the posture down, you'd definitely be a monster with the bow."

Tartaglia couldn't help but flinch at the word, and prayed that no one noticed.

Sadly, Amber did, and she grimaced, "Sorry, poor wording."

"No… it's fine…" Tartaglia sighed, before he changed the topic, "Okay, so we have fired shots without our Visions… how about we add that into the mix? And show me that horizontal shot again, that looks so cool! I want to try and do it too!"

"No! Get the normal stance right first!" Gorou countered, his ear twitching.

Sara subtly led Ganyu to the side, as Amber showed off her Baron Bunny to the group.

"So... what do you think?" Sara asked, "You're an Adeptus... I think I can trust your judgement. Gorou and Amber are young, and that Zhongli is clearly fond of the Harbinger..."

"You think this is some kind of trick? A facade, like all the masks and codenames he uses?" Ganyu inquired, and the tengu nodded, as they overheard the Harbinger complimenting the cuteness and stitching on the doll, like a older brother.

"He did try to drown my home... but I have it on good authority that he was being manipulated by the other Harbingers and the Cryo Archon. So I don't think it's fair to hold it against him. He is famous in the Fatui for being straightforward, after all." Ganyu admitted, "If you want my opinion... this is Childe in his purest form. Just a competitive mortal who cares for his family and likes to fight, no plots involved. Just a boy who met unfortunate circ*mstances and was forced to grow up too fast. I can see how my lord-... I mean, Zhongli, is fond of him."

"Hmmm." Sara noticed Ganyu's slip-ups, but didn't think too much about it. Perhaps Zhongli was in charge of Ganyu and Xiao during wartime, prior to his retirement. It didn't seem too far off; after all, his own boss did think he was an Adeptus.

It wasn't like he was Rex Lapis or someone like that. Maybe a general or their superior during the Archon War.

"Your bow is so heavy!" Amber's voice caught their attention, as the young archer tried to lift the bow up, to no avail, "How do you just... twirl it around so effortlessly?"

"Let me try!" Gorou attempted to lift the bow, but also failing.

"If he used a lesser bow, Childe probably would have snapped it in half with his strength." Zhongli's amused voice rang out, "In addition, I'm sure that a bow made of iron would be an excellent choice of melee weapon for bashing people in the head."

"Exactly... Hey, I don't whack people with my bow!"

"Anyways, are you aware of the history behind this particular weapon? It is said to once belong to a famed archer who slew monsters and bandits like silvergrass in the wind..."

Zhongli's voice droned on, and Sara shook her head at how Tartaglia hung on to every single word the man was saying, as Amber and Gorou looked at each other helplessly, not wanting to listen, but also not wanting to offend the older man by just running off, as Zhongli continued talking about a man who cast aside his bow to live as a hermit.

"Hopeless, this lot." Sara grumbled, but Ganyu just laughed softly, glad to see her lord so carefree and happy after millennia of losing friend after friend, losing Adepti who were almost akin to being his children.

Zhongli had immediately located the necessary ingredients, and left his pot of Slow-Cooked Bamboo Shoot Soup to simmer before leaving to check on the archery group, leaving strict instructions to the duo to make sure the soup doesn't overflow, or the fire doesn't grow too strong.

Diluc pulled his gloves off and chucked them into his pocket, as Kaeya rummaged through the shelves for his ingredients. It didn't take them long to find what they needed, and the both of them got to work, dancing past each other elegantly as Diluc reached out for the salt and Kaeya swiped a cut of meat that the redhead had been cutting, like they had been cooking together for their entire lives.

Kaeya started, "Hey, I'm sorry-"

"What are you even apologising for? I was the one that nearly lobbed your head off." Diluc cringed internally at his crude statement, nearly taking his own finger off in the process as he put the lid back on the pot, "You were having an internal conflict. You trusted me to be level-headed and hear you out regarding your secret. I know you would never... yet I still..."

"Look... Diluc..." Kaeya cut him off, "You had to make a difficult decision, and act on it. You needed someone to support you, and yet I just... shattered whatever remnants of the family you had left. Without any regard to your feelings. I'm sorry."

"You lost your original family too." Diluc murmured, "It was just bad timing. And I should have been more understanding. I can't imagine how you were feeling."

"I... wouldn't call him my family. A family doesn't push the pressure of the fate of an entire nation onto a child. A father doesn't leave their seven-year-old son stranded by the side of the road." Kaeya reached out for Diluc weakly, "What was I supposed to do? If it weren't for your father... I would probably have died out there in the rain."

"Our father." Diluc corrected, gently reaching out for Kaeya, "No matter where you came from, you're still family. And I'll kill anyone who says otherwise. Including you."

"Haha." Kaeya chuckled, "We can't change what has happened in the past. I didn't choose to be Khaenri'an. You couldn't help but be upset after losing our father. But the future… that's still up for grabs."

They both stood in silence, before Diluc reached out to check the temperature of his dish.

"Come back. To the Winery." Diluc urged.

"I can't."

Diluc's face fell ever so slightly as Kaeya continued, "Jean is overworked as it is. I can't leave the entire burden of protecting Mondstadt on her shoulders. Plus… someone has to be around to kick Albert in the nuts whenever he's harassing Barbara."

The redhead sighed; Kaeya did have a point there. He couldn't imagine letting the poor deaconess who was too nice to say no having someone like Albert clinging to her like a leech.

"But you'll visit?"

"Of course." Kaeya smirked, "Also, I heard from a little birdie about a certain vase…"

"Urg. Pallad." Diluc grumbled, remembering the conversation they were having with Hardworking Silio and Reckless Pallad about alcohol, which quickly took a dark turn as the brothers took turns taking jabs at each other while, according to rumours, the Traveller and the Anemo bard were frolicking around with some monocle.

"Ah, yes. Pallad did say that you kept it. And if he saw it in your home, it must be displayed in the main hall…" Kaeya hummed, "It must be unmistakable from all the other drab art pieces in your home…"

"Huh." Diluc snorted, "It's just a reminder of how bad your taste is. Only you could pick such a truly hideous vase."

Kaeya just burst out laughing, tension bleeding out of his form, as Diluc's expression melted into that of a small smile. He missed this; hanging out with his brother, messing around, playing pranks on each other, chasing crystalflies in the Winery yard…

A life they had both ruined, but a life they could both regain.

"Ah, my chicken is ready." Kaeya grinned, taking his dish out.

Diluc nodded, pointing at the other dishes they had finished, "We'll bring it outside. I don't think mine will burn anytime soon."

The duo picked up the food and exited the kitchen, only to see Venti leaning against the wall with his eyes closed, his arms crossed. The boy lifted his head when he noticed the brothers, and smiled, "So? How was it?"

"The food is-" Kaeya was cut off by Venti, "You know I'm not talking about the food."

"You were eavesdropping." Diluc cursed.

"You could say that! But the winds hear all." Venti chuckled, "Zhongli sent me to check on his soup. But I can't believe that Childe could be a Harbinger with how atrocious his form is! I know Thoma said his form was bad, but holy crap! He actuallythrowsthe arrows! No wonder that blockhead is so in love with him! Both of them just lob projectiles around!"

The bard giggled, "Also I didn't want to interrupt your conversation. Better that I'm the one who knows what's going on, am I right? You wouldn't want the Electro Archon to find out, would you? You saw how she treated Childe. Best that I'm here to distract and steer them away should they pop by."

Kaeya visibly paled, though he schooled his expression back into something co*cky, "Just how much did you overhear?"

"Hmmm…" Venti twirled around, "Just about everything, Ehe! Especially the fact that you're from thathush-hushplace! Not that I wasn't already aware of your... altercation. I was asleep, but knowledge is always carried in the wind."

"And you're not going to like… smite me or something?" Kaeya raised his lone visible eyebrow, and Diluc glared at him, hissing, "Why'd you ask that? You have a death wish or something?!"

"Why would I?" Venti snorted, before he turned serious, "Like you said; you had no choice in that matter. You have the freedom to choose your own fate, and you threw your lot in with Knights. You will always be a child of the winds, and I'm happy to have you as a loyal knight of Mondstadt, regardless of your birthplace."

"Didn't know you had it in you to be serious, bard." Diluc huffed.

"Shush, you." Venti pouted, poking Diluc in the nose to shut him up, before turning back to Kaeya and patting him on the back, a small breeze swirling around them, "You have my blessing, Kaeya. I'm sure Zhongli will understand, and as for Ei… well… she'll take a bit of convincing, but I'm sure that both Zhongli and I can protect you from her wrath."

"I… thank you." Kaeya nodded gratefully, and Venti chortled, "Of course! After all, you are my drinking buddy! I wouldn't want you hurt!"

"Ah, so it was because of the alcohol." Diluc grumbled, but both Kaeya and Venti could tell by the amusem*nt in his eyes that the redhead didn't really care.

"Love you too, bro!" Kaeya winked, and the Pyro user groaned, "That's it, I'm going to kill you!"

Cackling, the Cryo user dashed out of the teapot, taking care to not to drop his food, and Diluc just groaned, carefully carrying his food to chase after his brother, with Venti snickering at the duo.

Chapter 23: Your words eat me alive

Chapter Text

"He didn't hurt you right?" Eula quietly asked, checking her friend for any injuries as Amber emerged from the teapot, helping Kaeya and Diluc with their dishes.

"Nope!" Amber chirped, "It was fun! You should join us next time, Eula!"

Eula hummed non-committedly, as both their gazes trailed towards Zhongli, who was holding Tartaglia's bow, explaining something about different bow postures while demonstrating.

"Well, he hasn't hurt you, so I suppose no vengeance shall be partaken on my part." Eula huffed, and Amber just giggled. Zhongli and Tartaglia watched the interaction out of the corner of their eyes, and Zhongli tilted his head slightly, "So, how was it? Did you have fun with the others?"

Tartaglia nodded eagerly, "Yep! Sara and Gorou are great, even though I'm part of the Fatui. Amber is like Xinyan, so sweet and energetic and caring, so full of passion! They remind me of my younger siblings, you know? And then Ganyu is just super strong and I want to spar her one day!"

"Well then, I'd say... you should live for at least a thousand more years." Zhongli smiled, and Tartaglia paused, "Are you joking or are you actually being serious."

"Oh, I am fully serious." Zhongli replied, "Even without her Cryo Vision, Ganyu is still a formidable archer in her own right, having been in my service since even before the Archon War. Her experience in combat far outweighs yours, even though your abilities are still very impressive indeed. Though, for Ganyu, I'm glad that she's warming up to you. However, I was not aware you were acquainted with Xinyan."

"Xinyan's awesome!" Tartaglia laughed, "We actually met in Inazuma. Something about a music event and her needing a Visa? There was an awesome domain too, I hope it's still there, I'd love to visit it again."

Before they could continue their conversation, Beidou sauntered over to them, holding up a plate of Mondstadt Grilled Fish as she chowed down on a skewer, "Hate to interrupt you two love birds, but you might want to start eating lunch before it's all gone. Ning also wants to start earlier cause she wants to do some trade negotiations later with Mond and Inazuma, especially since the latter is opening up. You know, win-win scenario stuff."

She didn't mention how mentally draining this entire ordeal was for him, having all his unresolved issues being shoved back in his face when he had "solved" them just by running away and staying ahead of the sadness. And Tartaglia really appreciated that.

He and Zhongli took a skewer each, and the ex-archon nodded, "Understood, Captain Beidou. Thank you for informing us."

It was then that Beidou's first sentence sank in, and the god froze while Tartaglia spluttered like an idiot, "Hold up, what do you mean by love birds-"

"Huh? Wait... you're not?" Beidou frowned in confusion, "But Xingqiu said... and Hutao... and even Xiangling..."

She trailed off, as Zhongli and Tartaglia looked at each other, too stunned to speak.

"Aha... What was that about?" Tartaglia chuckled sheepishly, finally managing to pull himself together, as Beidou went back to harass Ningguang and Kazuha, as Zhongli looked back at him, equally stupefied, "You're asking me?"

After a sumptuous lunch, everyone settled back down, with a few plates of Adventurer's Breakfast Sandwiches, Chicken-Mushroom Skewers, Fisherman's Toast, Mondstadt Grilled Fish and Mondstadt Hash Browns strewn around the area for snacks.

Ajax trailed behind his father slowly, dread pooling in his stomach. He knew he was in trouble; he had disobeyed a direct order by his father, and had gone off to fight the monsters. And it wasn't some random isolated incident.

Nothing much happened in their sleepy little town of Morepesok, besides ice fishing and occasional animal and monster attacks. It was the reason he had run away in the first place, only to fall into darkness.

The very darkness that slushed through his veins like semi-frozen water, slowing him down, pulling him down so the ground could swallow him whole once again and condemn him to a never-ending lifetime of pain and agony. The reason why he wanted, no,neededto find things that made him feel whole, feel alive, to see the bursts ofcolor that dotted the world around him like a canvas.

Tartaglia chomped down on a Hash Brown, trying to ignore the pitying looks sent his way.

This monster attack was the first exciting thing that happened in Morepesok ever since he could remember... and now, it was likely to be the talk of the whole town.

His father gently guided Ajax into the house, and his mother greeted them, "Welcome back! I'm almost done with lunch! How was your fishing session? I see you didn't bring anything back!"

"It was alright. There were some issues." His father grunted, shrugging off his coat, "I need to talk to Ajax for a bit, we'll be out in time for lunch."

"I see..." She trailed off, as his father quickly ushered the boy into the bedroom, closing the door behind them. His father sat down on the bed, as Ajax just stood there, completely motionlessly, like a dead, lifeless statue.

"Come, Ajax." His father patted a spot on the bed next to him, and Ajax robotically moved to sit by him.

Zhongli felt Tartaglia tense up, and gently nudged him.

"I don't know what happened out there." His father started, before sighing, "Just a week ago I was worried you'd be too soft to even hurt Treasure Hoarders who would try to rob you... and yet, here you are, single-handedly taking out an entire group of Hilichurls."

The man gently patted Ajax's shoulder, ignoring the boy's flinching as he made contact, "Look... Ajax... I'm worried about you.I don't know what happened to you those three days when you went missing... but if you don't want to talk about it, I won't press. Just... know that we can help you, okay? Me, your mother, your older siblings..."

At this point, Ajax wanted to burrowunder the blankets and scream and cry.

He wanted to tell them, wanted to tell them sobadlyabout the three months he had spent down in the depths, with nothing but the occasional overcooked lavender melon for sustenance, being so thirsty and yet the only water source being so putrid and corrosive, he was surprised it didn't just burn his mouth and throat away on contact.

How agonizing it was, wanting so desperately to get home, knowing there was a very real chance that it would never happen, knowing that had he been less lucky, the Abyss Herald he was with could have grown bored of him one day and just tossed him away like a useless piece of trash.

How battle and violence was now ingrained deeply in his body and mind, for he had no other options left for him.

How the vile, miasmic air burned his lungs, how breathing the snowy frigid air of Snezhnaya hurtso damn much, and yet, he was grateful for that because it was a reminder that he had gotten out.

How even after escaping from that place, voices screamed in ancient tongues in his head, plaguing him even beyond the grave.

How the few days he spent with his family after getting out had left him wilting inside, feeling more dead than even the most painful and dangerous of fights, the entire world dim and drab, so dull and boring, everything that Ajax used to love being everything that Ajax had grown to hate.

The two sworn brothers shared a look, as Jean wrapped her arms around Barbara, cuddling the younger girl.

How the heart in his chest no longer pulsed with life, but with the absolute darkness of broken hopes and dreams, knowing he was shattered, broken beyond relief, and everything just felt so, so wrong.

How that fight with the monsters had truly opened his eyes, the eyes that had been gorged out and corrupted by the Abyss, and allowed him to see so much, to feel so much, blood racing to the beat of his heart, using the snow as a canvas to paint a beautiful, breathtaking picture of bloodshed.

He knew there was something wrong with him the moment he instinctively tried to point his blade at his family. But he couldn't tell them, couldn't risk it. The Abyss was old, so old, so powerful, far beyond human comprehension.

Venti closed his eyes and shook his head. That's exactly what Khaenri'ah had did, playing with powers beyond them, and they had paid the price for it.

If he just uttered the name of that wretched place, would it taint hisfather too? Would it taint his entire family?

Ayato frowned. He understood that feeling, at least, on a fundamental level; that was exactly how he felt when his parents had died, leaving him to bear the burden of a failing clan. A burden he couldn't pass on to Ayaka; she was still so young, and he wanted here to enjoy her childhood. He was the older brother, this was his duty, and he couldn't let his family suffer because of his shortcomings.

Thoma was around his age, and was the most reliable person Ayato could think of, but he was still a foreigner. While Ayato had nothing against his best friend for his birthplace, being reminded of the family he had left behind, the family he had come looking for, yet turning up with nothing... not to mention how brutal Inazuma's political system was, especially for foreigners.

No. He couldn't let Thoma suffer like that. Not after Ayato had explicated given Thoma the option to leave them behind, not expecting the loyal blonde to even gain a Vision after pledging his undying loyalty to the clan that had given him a home, a family, when they had no reason to do so.

If he were to let Thoma help him directly, then people would say that he was soft, or being manipulated. They would say he was just a filthy foreigner trying to squeeze Inazuma dry, and Ayato knew that as bright and sunny as Thoma was... anything would break with enough stress.

Thoma wasn't an exception to that. And Ayato couldn't afford to let that happen; couldn't risk letting his best friend bend and break under all that pressure, leaving him damaged permanently by the harsh, unjust elders of other clans who were all for manipulation.

Setting him as Ayaka's personal retainer was the best he could do, to give him enough authority and power to prevent all sorts of nasty rumors, and yet, not enough power that the heads of other clans would complain.

Ayaka and Thoma were the bright spots in his life. He may be dragged down by the clan's reputation, but he had no intentions of dragging them along with him. It wasn't until they were all older, no longer impressionable kids, teenagers who were far more sure of themselves, secure in their motives and ambitions, that Ayato felt more comfortable delegating smaller tasks to the duo.

He couldn't do that. He screwed up enough as it was. If he had just been content with his life, he wouldn't have fallen in the first place. None of this would have happened.

And yet, Ajax couldn't say he regretted it. Itwasboring, doing nothing but fishing all day, buying and selling crops and hoping to be able to feed his family. Sure, it was essential, but Ajax couldn't exactly say he'd be content with that life.

That wasn't living. That was just going through the motions.

Living was all about experiences, seeing new things, meeting new people, visiting new places, learning new skills.

Seeing the joys and wonders of life, being better that he was before.

But now that he was nothing but an empty broken husk... could that even be considered living?

"Imagine having an existential crisis at the age of fourteen." Xingqiu joked, but no one laughed.

They did appreciate the attempt to lighten the mood, as much as the joke fell flat.

Ajax couldn't even tell what were his own thoughts, and what was from whatever lingering damage the Abyss had done to his psyche.

"Time for lunch!" His mother's voice broke him out of his thoughts, and his father patted him on the shoulder one more time, "Take your time, okay, boy?"

With that, his father stood up and walked out of the room, and Ajax realized that his father's hand felt so cold, so dead, against his withering body.

Ajax forced himself out of the darkness of the room and into the brightly lit living room, moving robotically into his chair as his older sister served some food. He knew his older brother was out, but he should be home soon, as usual.

Eula's face fell slightly, and Amber patted her on the shoulder. Meals had always been awkward in the Lawrence Clan, especially when they cared more about appearances and reputation more than anything else. Eula hated mealtimes, unless she was allowed to eat in the privacy of her own rooms, talking cheerily to the maids and teachers when she was younger.

When his family started eating, Ajax did too, even through the food tasted like ashes in his mouth, and he wasn't sure how long he could take it until his stomach just decided it wanted to give up on him.

Skirk had told him that leaving the Abyss would have consequences. Maybe that was it; taking away the few things he loved and crumbling them away to nothing right in front of his very eyes.

No, the Abyss wasn't breaking anything, it was letting Ajax himself destroy everything he'd ever loved, letting him break himself in a way that no one, not even the Abyss, ever could.

Zhongli let out what seemed like a whimper mixed with a growl, and Tartaglia couldn't help but chuckle, letting the ex-Archon pull him closer, as if challenging the Abyss to evendareto hurt him.

He heard the snow crunching, before footsteps thundered on their porch.

"Whew!" His older brother chirped, pushing the door open, "You wouldn't believe what had happened."

"Oh?" His older sister enquired, standing up to ladle some food for the new arrival, "Tell us over lunch, I'll grab your food real quick."

"Apparently the Hilichurls decided to attack for no reason. Did a huge number on the fences and some houses. Luckily, no one got too badly hurt, and the Fatui managed to heal up the worst cases."

"Ah, thank the Tsaritsa and the Fatui." His mother prayed, "If it weren't for them, the whole village would be overrun!"

"Mama, it's their job... who knows what they are up to..." His older sister winced, "You know we haven't heard the best things about them..."

"Huh... even the locals..." Keqing murmured angrily, "Those no-good Fatui."

"I know... but they do help us in scenarios like this. We should be grateful." His mother chided.

"You want to know what I heard?"

"What is it?" Tonia asked curiously, some soup dripping out if the corner of her mouth.

"Oh no..." Sara grumbled, "Rumors."

Ajax bit his lip and tried to focus on his breathing, trying to ignore the sudden surge of bloodlust, the urge to kill whatever was touching him, because something that was touching was something that could kill him, and he needed to kill it first so he wouldn't die-

Xiao sighed silently, and shook his head. He shouldn't be feeling sorry for the Fatui. The stupid kid had tried to drown Liyue, even if he might have been manipulated into doing it. At the very least, he should just be on neutral terms with the Harbinger, simply because his Lord was fond of the boy, for some odd reason.

But he felt it. He knew, understood that feeling of needing to hurt everything before they hurt him... and he hated that he had some sort of kinship with a Harbinger that nearly destroyed Liyue.

"I heard that the Fatui only got there after all the Hilichurls were defeated."

"Fatty? And Hilly Choo!" Anthon cheered, his mouth half full as he held his spoon sloppily.

"Now now, Anthon, what did I say about eating with your mouth full?" His mother chided, before turning back to his older brother, "That's ridiculous... if not the Fatui... then who..."

"A little birdie told me that it was our little Ajax." His older brother laughed, ruffling Ajax's hair affectionately. It was only because Ajax was expecting something like this to happen when he felt his brother stepped behind him, that the older man didn't have a knife stuck through the palm of his hand.

"Don't be silly." His older sister scolded, "Ajax went missing for three days, stop teasing him. He's had it rough enough without your bullying."

"No, I'm serious." His older brother explained, "I overheard it, some of the elders were talking about a kid who just leapt into the fight and just utterly decimated the Hilichurls like some kind of monster. I was pretty sure they were delusional or were hallucinating or something if they hadn't mentioned Papa specifically. Said he just popped out of nowhere to wrangle the kid home."

"Uh oh..." Amber winced, remembering how Tartaglia had reacted before their shooting session, before mouthing another apology at the Harbinger.

Ajax tuned out the second his brother said the word "monster".

"He thinks you're a monster."

His own family. He knew it wasn't intentional, that his older brother was just talking about rumors and gossip, but some small part of his brain wasn't with the program.

"A monster, because isn't that what you are, Ajax?"

Shut up. He doesn't mean it. He's just repeating what other people have said,Ajax want to respond, but his imaginary voice refused to manifest, like his vocal chords had been ripped out of his throat, leaving him unable to do anything save for spluttering out some incomprehensible garbage.

The voices of his family's discussion grew fainter, like he was under water, rippling all around him but never actually involving him. His vision was dimming, the world fading from monochrome to black, life draining even further from his dull eyes, as the cacophony inside his head grew louder, echoing around discordantly, leaving him unable to make any words out.

And Ajax let himself drown in the depths of his own mind.

Chapter 24: Is misery what I deserve

Chapter Text

Zhongli gently tugged Tartaglia closer, looking worriedly at the absolutely blank expression the Harbinger wore. His eyes looked duller than usual, his fingers lacking the usual twitchiness he got whenever he was forced to sit in place for too long instead of fighting, his posture slightly slumped as he let the ex-Archon wrap an arm around him comfortingly.

"Hey." Zhongli asked quietly, snapping Tartaglia out of his trance, "It'll be alright."

"Mhm." Tartaglia hummed non-committedly, though he didn't sound very convinced, leaning against the god and letting himself be cuddled.

Ajax went about his day, doing everything that was asked of him, whether it be chopping firewood, tending to his younger siblings or just going out with his older sister to buy groceries.

"Stay here, Ajax." His older sister instructed, leaving him with the groceries, "I need to check something real quick, give me five minutes."

With that, his older sister walked towards a local shop that sold handmade accessories, still somewhere in his line of sight. He was pretty sure his sister would take more than five minutes, but she wasn't the kind who was too obsessed with that kind of stuff, preferring more practical items rather that just merely aesthetically pleasing ones, so she'd probably be back in maybe fifteen minutes.

Meanwhile, Ajax just entertained himself by observing the Fatui soldiers who were standing guard. There were occasional cases of muggings and kidnapping, so he didn't think it was too unreasonable for the Fatui to be here.

"Muggings and kidnappings?" Ningguang frowned. Snezhnaya was a very cold nation, and she couldn't think of any reasons why foreigners would want to brave the elements to kidnap people, for whatever reasons, where there were five (six if she counted Inazuma, but given its recent abolishment of the Sakoku Decree, she doubted it was a viable option) other nations where it would be far easier and safer to commit such a crime, which meant that it was most likely that Snezhnayans were mugging their own citizens. Which made absolutely no sense to her.

Others seemed to have come to the same conclusion, and looked at Tartaglia questioningly, blatantly ignoring the fact that the god was comforting him.

"Don't look at me. I don't know sh*t. If it's not Fatui related, I wouldn't know a thing." Tartaglia admitted, "If itisFatui related, I'd say it's Dottore pulling his crap again, but then again as far as I know the sucker's in Mondstadt doing his inhumane, twisted, borderline psychotic, bullsh*t experiments, and-"

His face twisted into a snarling grimace at the statement, but his rant was cut off when Zhongli patted his shoulder gently. Ningguang sighed; at the very least, the young Harbingerdidhave some morals. Even if Zhongli had been Liyue's former Archon, she would never have tolerated him being fond of Tartaglia if he was okay with unethical experimentations.

He wasn't sure how long he'd spent staring at the two patrolling guards, but suddenly, Ajax froze, and he looked around for his sister. She wasn't at the stall he had seen her at, and his heart throbbed.

"Wait what!?" Amber squeaked, alarmed.

Where was she? It wasn't like her to just disappear like that; if she was going to a different stall, she would have told him.

Panicking, the young fourteen year old immediately abandoned the groceries, and set off to find his sister. He made a direct beeline for the shop he had seen her at, looking around wildly.

"сестра?"

How did he not notice her going missing? He was a terrible younger brother.

"You were fourteen. And you were going through your own issues." Sara stated fairly, "That isn't your fault."

One of the Fatui soldiers must have noticed him, because one of them said something to the other soldier, before weaving through the crowd to get to him.

"Is there something wrong, boy?" He asked, "Are you lost?"

Ajax wasn't too sure what to think of the Fatui. All he knew was that they worked for the Cryo Archon as some sort of military, and his family clearly didn't think too highly of them. But this was his sister he was talking about, and Ajax was more than willing to swallow his pride if it meant that she was safe.

Keqing's expression softened ever so slightly.

"My older sister, she was just here, and-"

A small noise caught his attention, and he paused, looking around, trying to determine the source of the sound. If he hadn't fallen into the Abyss, it was unlikely that he would have picked up on the sound. Heck, he might have starting bawling again, like the useless child Ajax was, instead of actually trying to solve the problem.

But now that he was on extremely high alert, his razor sharp instincts and hearing that had been honed by the depths allowed him to pick up on small details that he otherwise might not have picked up on.

"Ohhh, suspense!" Yae rubbed her hands together, but Zhongli just growled at her.

"Can youpleasebe more sensitive?" Ganyu pleaded, seeing the angry glint in her Lord's eyes; Yae was still a friend, and she didn't want the god to murder the kitsune, "This is a very serious matter, even if you do not think so, or have any personal stake in this."

Noticing Zhongli's pissed off glare, Yae shuddered, but smiled coyly, "Very well."

"Your sister-"

Ajax shushed the Fatui soldier as he heard some more noises, and immediately decided to investigate. He stalked off towards the alleyway he heard the noise from, the Fatui soldier following behind slowly, somewhat confused but also curious as to just what was going on.

He rounded the corner, and stared ahead, clenching his fists murderously, as he saw some guys pushing his sister against the wall and holding her at knife point.

"I told you already, I don't have money! I used them to buy groceries!"

"So there are people like that in Snezhnaya..." Thoma winced, "I never would have thought... even if there isn't enough money to go around, everyone has enough food, water, the sorts..."

"Aren't you like... privileged? You're from one of the commissions?" Chongyun asked in confusion.

Normally, Ayato would probably be pissed off if someonedaredcall Thoma privileged, knowing how much hardship he had faced just to earn his position, let alone all the crap they had to go through as his parents died and burden of carrying the Kamisato name fell to him, having few people to support him as literally everyone else under the sun tried to manipulate them. Thoma deserved everything he had earned for himself, and so, so much more.

But he knew that Chongyun wasn't malicious or manipulative, and merely spoke out of ignorance and confusion, so he tried to explain while holding back as much personal information as possible.

"Thoma is a part of the Kamisato Clan." Ayato stated firmly, staring at Thoma in case it was the Pyro userhimselfwho might have such doubts, "However, we have faced... well, I wouldn't saysimilar situations, but the lack of resources is a problem any nation would face at some point. You are aware of the Sakoku Decree, correct?"

Chongyun paused, before remembering some things Xingqiu had complained about. He mostly talked about writing and matters regarding the Feiyun Commerce Guild, but Chongyun did have a basic understanding of trade between nations,especiallyin Inazuma since Xingqiu apparently had a book series that had grown popular there, but was unable to sell more copies due to the decree.

"Oh." Chongyun nodded to himself, "I see."

Ei rolled her eyes, but ultimately left Ayato to his own devices. As devious with he was with going behind her back during the Vision Hunt Decree, she knew he had Inazuma's best interests at heart, even if that only stemmed from wanting to keep his family safe. He didn't care much about trying to climb the hierarchy, and strived for eternity in the form of balance; that was a concept she could understand, and it was something she could support.

"Please, bitch." One of then spat on her, pressing the tip of the knife further against her throat, "You didn't have any f*cking groceries, and you were looking at jewelry!"

"Language!" Hutao screeched, but Kaeya raised an eyebrow at her, "Are we going to ignore Tortilla's swears now?"

"Eh, these are his memories, he can have a pass." Hutao shrugged, "I think he's entitled to a few swears."

"What, is it a crime to look?" She hissed, unwilling to back down, but she just slapped for her efforts.

"Know your place, woman." Another man snarled, "Hand over your money, if not, we'll -"

"Don't touch her!"

He didn't even get to finish his sentence, before he was met with a punch to the face by an angry fourteen year old.

"Kill them."

"Hmph. I agree." Diluc huffed, and all the Mondstadt citizens stared at him like he had grown a second head.

"What?"

"You are agreeing... with a Fatui Harbinger." Eula pointed out.

"He isn't part of the Fatui yet." Diluc stated offhandedly, as if that answered all their unasked questions.

Blood roaring in his ears, his heart pounding rapidly, Ajax screeched as darkness rushed through his veins, and he immediately kicked the man with the knife, forcing him to drop it. The others backed away, surprised by the sudden appearance of an angry boy and a Fatui soldier, letting his older sister go free.

She nursed her bruised cheek, as the Fatui soldier rushed over to them, checking on her, "Ma'am? Are you alright?"

"You said she was alone!"

"Well, yeah, I saw her by herself! How was I supposed to know this bitch-"

Ajax saw red, and he expertly scooped the fallen knife up before lunging at the men, slashing the blade around like an expert, kicking and punching and screaming wildly, not caring who he hit as long as it wasn't his sister or the Fatui soldier tending to her, before stabbing the weapon directly into the shoulder of the man who had insulted his sister.

"Don't you dare speak toсестраlike that!" Ajax hissed, digging the blade deeper into his shoulder, cutting through more flesh and muscle and jabbing the tip of the knife between his bones. Crimson dripped onto the snow, staining the ground red, as Ajax slammed the guy into the wall, bashing his skull against the hard surface, twisting the knife harshly for added measure before pulling it out.

Noelle winced at the violence, shuddering slightly. Maybe... maybe she wasn't ready to be a Knight yet. Jean, Eula, Amber, Kaeya, even Diluc... when they went out of patrols, was this the kind of violence they had to face? Noelle understood beating up monsters, and she was perfectly okay with that... but when the monsters were fellow citizens...

Noelle looked down. She still wanted to be a Knight so badly, but now, she didn't feel the rush to be one. She hadn't passed her exams yet, for one, as for experience... perhaps she was severely lacking in that department. Maybe she'll help Barbara in the infirmary some time, healing the wounded; she rarely got injuries due to her shield, and she wasn't that used to blood from fights, only from minor injuries like being careless while cutting vegetables, or cuts and bruises that didn't even bleed.

But while learning about the horrors of the world outside Mondstadt's walls, she'd continue to do her duty and solve the problems within.

"Go on!"Something inside goaded him on,"Go on! Hurt them! Kill them!"

It was tempting to listen to the voice. To let out more crimson ink for him to paint on his canvas, to vent all his pent up frustration at the sensations of dying inside. To let the darkness out, to let it haunt anyone, everyone, and give him a small respite from the frosty grasp the pit had around his throat.

Zhongli let out a strangled growl, and tugged Tartaglia closer.

"Ajax?" His sister squeaked.

Her voice snapped him out of his trance, his anger dissipating like the fleeting existence of a bubble on the surface of the water, the pressure slowly building up before disappearing in a single, silent pop.

"Ajax!" She called out again, and the teenager slowly turned around, the bloody knife slipping out of his grasp and onto the carmine-stained snow. The other men were nursing their cuts and bruises by the boy's brutal assault, all of them shivering in fear, trying their best to get away from themonsterof a child, terror so clearly reflected in their bright, gleaming eyes.

Unlike Ajax; the life had long been sucked out of him.

Kazuha shook his head, and looked at Tartaglia.

The Abyss was somewhere that Kazuha would never want to visit, even as a wandering samurai who enjoyed experiencing fascinating places and learning about their history. It was just a concept of that he couldn't really wrap his head around; an empty blackhole with a hunger for ambition, a vast nothingness that sucked the life out of everything, replacing it with darkness that feeds on its host like a parasite, corrupting their mind and body until there was nothing left but the festering desire for pure violence and savage ferocity.

"Ajax!" His sister rushed forwards to hug him, as the Fatui soldier ignored the carnage and proceeded to tie up the men, who were all screaming for mercy.

"What... how..." She inspected him closely, before shaking her head and wrapping him once more in a hug, "Doesn't matter how. Thank you, брат. You saved me."

If Ajax had the capacity to cry, he would be crying right about now; his hands clenching and unclenching, hovering awkwardly without a weapon in hand. He loved his sister, would do anything to protect her, and yet, upon her touching him... his brain went into overdrive, wondering if it was an illusion, whether it was an enemy who wanted to kill him, automatically reaching out for a potential weapon to get rid of his attacker.

Kokomi and Gorou both shared a wince. That was exactly the problem they had with some of the Watatsumi Army soldiers; men fueled by anger and hatred, who had grown so used to war, that the end of the Vision Hunt Decree, and subsequently, the war between the Watatsumi Army and the Shogun's forces, had resulted in such a large shock that they didn't know what else to do besides fighting.

Kokomi had temporarily settled the issue with a Secret Corps division of the army, but she knew that this wouldn't be a permanent solution, nor would it solve any problems in the long run.

Before he knew it, he and his sister were led back out onto the main street by the soldier.

"Hey, what happened?" The other Fatui soldier asked, picking up their groceries, "You just ran off with the kid."

"We got the muggers... or at least, some of them." The first soldier reported, dragging the tied up men behind him, who were still way too scared of Ajax to act out, "Called the others for these guys' sentencing. I'm going to escort them home, just to be safe."

"Eh, sure. I can watch these thugs." The other soldier shrugged, "Get them home safe."

With that, Ajax and his older sister made their way back, a Fatui soldier trailing along with them, looking around warily with a Pyro-infused gun. Ajax didn't know how the gun was supposed to work, but after the Abyss, he supposed anything was possible.

Though the soldier seemed a little wary of him, but didn't seem to mind too much at the boy peering at his weapon curiously.

Upon reaching their home, his sister pushed the front door open, "папа!мама! We're back!"

"Ah! We just brewed some tea, it must be cold outside..." Their mother paused when she saw the Fatui soldier, "Hello? Is something the matter?"

"Uh... yes." The Fatui soldier replied awkwardly, "Your two children were almost involved in a mugging? I just came to ensure they got home safe. And perhaps fill you in regarding the details."

"At least he's telling the parents." Beidou muttered in approval. She didn't have any kids, but her entire crew, Kazuha included, was her family. Liyue was her home, and she loved the mischievous antics of the teenagers that dotted the harbor, whether it be Xiangling and her weird (but tasty) dishes, Xingqiu's constant pranks on Chongyun, or Yunjin lying about Xinyan's true identity in order to visit her friend.

They might not want to share their problems, not wanting to burden others with their issues, but if someone had to be escorted back home by military forces, Beidou would be throwing hands if she were a parent and wasn't aware of just what the heck had gone down.

"Oh no!" Their mother hastily checked the duo over, and Ajax had to resist the urge to flinch when she brushed her hand against some blood splattered on his cheek, noticing out of the corner of his eye as his father stood up from his chair and walked towards them, "Are you two okay?"

"We're fine." His sister admitted, as his father led the Fatui soldier towards the table, "Come, have some tea. We can talk about the details. жена, go get the kids cleaned up."

Ajax's mother nodded, ushering his sister and himself out of the room, as his father poured some tea out for the Fatui soldier.

"I'm so glad you two are safe. It must have been so scary." Their mother cooed, snatching off Ajax's bloodied jackets and immediately fetching some clean clothes for them, grabbing some damp towels for them to clean up because it wasn't the appropriate time for them to shower, saving the water and the wood for later, when everyone was home and could bathe with warm water in quick succession.

"Oh yeah... I suppose that is an issue when your nation is literally a frozen wasteland..." Albedo murmured.

By the time their mother deemed them clean and freshened up, completely free of blood, the soldier was long gone, and their father was sitting by the table, accompanied by two cups of tea, one empty and one completely full, elbows resting against the table, his hands clasped together. His head was hung, lacking any energy, almost like he were seriously contemplating everything wrong with his life.

"I hate to break it to you... but he probably was." Eula muttered, the pose and expression hitting abit too personally for her; she had been trying to visit some of the maids she knew who had, somehow, not been laid off by the Lawrence Clan, only to notice her father before the maids ushered her out in time before her family saw her and caused another commotion.

Except, in her case, she had a feeling her father was only upset over the stain to the name of the Lawrence Clan and their reputation by being related to rebellious Knight, instead of lamenting over the loss of his daughter.

Lucky for her, only Amber heard her, and patted her arm comfortingly.

Ajax was just sent to his room that he shared with Anthon and Tonia while his parents had a word with his older sister, and he just moved along so robotically, even his younger siblings could tell that something was wrong.

"Something bothering Big Brother?" Anthon asked, playing with some toys on the carpet, noticing Ajax slowly shifting away from him, unwilling to risk tainting him.

Tonia nodded in agreement, putting her pencil down, "You look sad. Is something wrong?"

Everything was wrong. He was wrong. Ajax had already messed up with the villagers and his father, maybe his older brother, and now his older sister.

He ruined everything.

But he couldn't tell that to his kid siblings, no. His siblings were still so young, Ajax couldn't push his burdens onto them, or anyone else for that matter.

Diluc winced, and sighed, only looking up when Kaeya patted his leg and grinned at him. Both of them had been old enough to know that the pain and hurt they'd both inflicted on each other hadn't been intentional, and that Diluc had been lashing out without knowing how to do it in a healthy way.

This is his punishment, his curse to bear, and so, like a responsible big brother, Ajax plastered a fake smile on his face, "Nah, Big Bro Ajax is fine. Just tired."

"Sleep is good." Anthon grinned, a tooth missing, as he pushed a wooden toy car in Ajax's direction.

"Aha! What is that I see?" Ajax yelled, peering over to look inside Anthon's mouth, "You finally dropped a baby tooth! You're all grown up now! When did that happen?"

The younger boy puffed his chest out proudly, "Anthon big boy now! Tooth Fairy brought Ajax home!"

"... Tooth... Fairy?" Xiao raised an eyebrow.

Ajax had no idea what Anthon was talking about, but Tonia explained, "His tooth fell out while you were missing.мамаtold him to put it under the pillow and the Tooth Fairy will give him Mora... but he said he didn't want it, and wanted you back instead."

"Is there even such a thing?" The Yaksha asked, confused.

"I'll explain later." Aether offered, and Xiao nodded.

Normally, Ajax would burst into tears right there on the spot. But this wasn't Ajax; Ajax was dead, killed by the depths of the Abyss, with all that remained being a monster in his skin. He couldn't cry; not that he wanted to, anyways, but monsters didn't cry.

But he had a facade to put up, and Ajax cooed at his younger brother, "Ahhh! So sweet, брат!"

Anthon squealed, and lunged at Ajax, wrapping his arms around his older brother, and Ajax had no other option but to hug him back, ensuring not to make direct contact with his younger brother and that there was always a few layers of clothes between them.

Ajax was already ruined. He fell into the Abyss, slaughtered monsters and freaked the villagers out, and now his sister had nearly been mugged, kidnapped, maybe killed if he hadn't found her in time. He didn't want to ruin his younger siblings too; siblings who were, so, so young, so innocent, so new to everything, so ignorant to all the dangers of the world.

Ajax couldn't afford to taint them too, and he'd do his best to make sure that never happened, even if he died trying.

Chapter 25: Don't leave me here like this

Chapter Text

"That's... a very heavy burden." Keqing admitted, eyes softening as she gazed at the Harbinger, as Qiqi stood up to do her stretches to counter her rigor mortis, resulting in the projection to be paused; no one minded the small interruption, and it gave them a small opportunity to ponder about the events that had transpired.

"Could this...darknesseven spread like that?" Xingqiu wondered, "Like… Childe is still human, even if... you know... that happened..."

"Not sure, and we aren't eager to find out." Venti shook his head, "Let's not play around with Abyssal energy, okay?"

"It's a valid concern... especially considering where we are. And how we supposedly ended up in here." Ningguang stated.

"Enjou did say that our Visions should protect us, though?" Barbara protested weakly.

"Who?" Tartaglia asked, confused.

"Oh yeah... you weren't here." Aether sighed, giving them a brief rundown about the dango-liking Abyss Lector's appearance, "And no, Childe, you cannot fight him."

"I didn't say I wanted to."

"Please, Childe. You could pick a fight with a pair of chopsticks." Aether snorted.

"Actually, Childe had originally thought that-" Zhongli was abruptly cut off as Tartaglia covered his mouth, his face red with embarrassment, "No! We aren't talking about this!"

"Ohhh, tea!" Hutao vibrated in her seat excitedly, "Spill!"

"No!"

"Aiya, you're no fun."

Ignoring the pouting Hutao, Ei crossed her arms, "I think that we should be alright, especially since this environment doesn't seem to be hostile, so the Visions should be sufficient. However, there is hardly any research done on the Abyss, so whether the "darkness" could infect and harm others is unknown. It would be much safer for older mortals with Visions... but for children..."

"No hugs. Got it." Tartaglia sighed.

"Well, if there's no direct contact, it should be alright?" Gorou offered uncertainly.

"Qiqi is done with stretches." The zombie announced, sitting down, and everyone immediately quietened as the projection continued.

Ajax sighed, as he trudged back home, robotically pulling his coat around his body despite not feeling cold, having just dropped his younger siblings off at school.

It wasn't the best school out there, being just a huge, cold building with barely any heating, and it was pretty much just some Fatui soldiers trying their best to teach a bunch of rowdy kids some basic life skills like reading and writing in their free time. But at the very least, these soldiers actually lived inMorepesok originally, so Ajax didn't really doubt their intentions; it wasn't like they were trying to brainwash the kids into joining the Fatui or some crap like that.

"Actually, I take that back. Knowing Dottore…" Tartaglia hissed grumpily.

"I'm going to kill him." Diluc grumbled, and Kaeya rolled his eyes, knowing full well that Diluc wouldn't act on his words; as much as they despised that stupid Harbinger for all his human experimentations (poor, poor Collei, they just hoped she was doing well with Cyno in Sumeru), they couldn't kill him in fear of retaliation by the Tsaritsa.

They just couldn't understand why an Archon would want a psychotic man like that as a Harbinger. Surely, she should know of all the vile, twisted, inhumane things he had done, for example, injecting Archon Residue into a sick child, or turning one of his subordinates into a cyborg hybrid.

Sighing, Ajax decided to take the long way home, through a path that he knew was littered with Hilichurls and other creatures; after all, if there were warnings to stay away, there were most likely monsters that the commonfolk couldn't handle.

He didn't bring a weapon, but with his Hydro Vision, Ajax was more than capable of dealing with the Hilichurls who were armed with nothing more than crossbows and clubs, and it wasn't long before the Hilichurl camp was reduced to nothing but blood and the lingering miasma of residual Abyssal energy as the Hilichurls were slain.

Before he knew it, Ajax was walking along the well-trodden path that led to his home, and several people were exiting their own homes along the path to get more fire wood or to throw out the trash.

"Oh, look who it is." The boy's expression twisted into something akin to disgust.

Zhongli let out a very angry, distinct growl, but seeing as he had previously threatened Ei, no one was really surprised.

He vaguely recognized the boy as the younger brother of a friend of his older sister, and Ajax frowned, trying to suppress the burning sensation bubbling up from his gut, urging him to kill.

"What did I even do?" Ajax defended himself.

"You know what you did." The older boy sneered, "I've heard the rumors, that you smacked those monsters around effortlessly. Killing all those creatures like you knew their weaknesses."

"Isn't that... good?" Noelle asked, confused, "After all, if they pose a threat to the village... shouldn't it be good that they have you to help, instead of relying on the Fatui?"

"Morepesok is a very calm seaside village, and the monsters don't attack much anyways..." Diluc muttered, "They probably thought that having a kid like him would be more trouble than it was worth."

Tartaglia winced at the harsh wording, and Zhongli proceeded to direct his venomous glare at the Pyro user.

Ajax gulped. He didn't exactly know their weaknesses, per say, but he's fought enough of them in the Abyss that he generally had a good idea on how to take them down.

"What are you, some kind of freak?" The other boy growled, "People don't just go missing for no reason and pop back out of nowhere with the skillset of a killer."

"Okay, that's just rude and uncalled for!" Gorou protested.

Another boy popped out of the house, "What's taking so long? Hurry up, the soup's getting cold!"

"The kid's here! You know, the one everyone's talking about!"

Let us out, the darkness within him hissed, we can crush him, silence his noisy, blabbering mouth forever... you'll feel so much better...

Shut up,Ajax shrieked back.

"Leave him be!" The friend of his sister grumbled, walking out to yank the first boy back into the house, "Sorry about that!"

Ajax didn't even get the chance to respond before the door slammed shut, and the younger boy blinked, trying to figure out just what had happened.

Sighing, Ajax just trudged back home. He pushed open the front door, calling out emotionlessly, "I'm back."

"Ah! Finally!" His mother smiled, poking her head out of the kitchen, "You were gone for so long! We were getting worried."

Fidgeting slightly, Ajax nodded silently, rubbing his hands together nervously. Clearing out the Hilichurl camp had given him an opportunity to burn off some of his energy, but that encounter with that other boy just made him agitated all over again. It made him want to whip out another weapon, to press it against his throat, to draw that crimson life blood, to look at him dead in the eye and show him how the Hilichurls paled in comparison to the true horrors of the Abyss.

Tartaglia could feel Zhongli's hands creeping down his arms, clutching onto him firmly, before resting his chin on his shoulder. If this wasn't just a serious matter, he would have laughed at just how clingy and overprotective Zhongli was, but he knew how cautious the former Archon was of the Abyss.

"Hey. I'm fine." Tartaglia whispered.

"I... know that." Zhongli nodded subtly, nuzzling into his neck, "Just... let me have this peace of mind."

"Your father should be chopping wood. Go help him." His mother urged, "I'll have a snack ready for you when you're done."

Normally Ajax would have gone to help even without the incentive of food, but now, just talking about food made him feel sick. Nothing tasted right, like that cursed river in the Abyss had seared off all his tastebuds, and every single bite he took reminded him that he was dead.

No longer could he taste his mother's delicious cooking, to feel the warmth of his family. Ajax was dead, swallowed by the Abyss long ago.

Ajax nodded at his mother, before heading outside. His father wiped some sweat off his brow despite the chilly weather, and the boy moved to take the axe from his father. He felt his father flinch ever so slightly,but eventually, his father did pass the axe over to him, letting the younger boy chop the wood before moving and sitting on a bench to catch his breath.

It didn't take him long to get through a large pile of wood, and he and his father started moving the firewood into the house and shed.

"Good job, Ajax." His father huffed, after moving the last of the firewood. He clapped the boy on the back, and Ajax jumped, immediately whirling around with a non-existent weapon in his hand, using his other to grab his father's wrist, before realizing who it was.

"Ajax?"

Ajax slowly looked up, looking his father directly in the eye. But the expression on his father's face just made him flinch; the older man was looking at him like he was just a monster wearing his son's face.

Because that's what you are...The voices mocked.

"What's wrong with you? You're usually so calm, so happy… but now… you're just agitated and nervous and jumpy…" His father shook his head, "Please, Ajax, my boy, this isn't you. If something to you out in the woods, while you went missing... you can tell us, we can help you."

Kaeya sighed. Another good meaning father who had no idea what they were getting into...

He really missed Crepus; the man that had found him, cold and shivering under a tree in a downpour, the father that had taken him in and treated him like a person instead of just a tool, a means to an end, not asking questions nor pressing further despite knowing that Kaeya was hiding secrets about his origins.

Overflowing with emotions, with pain and agony, his blood boiling beneath his skin, making him feel like he could combust on the spot. Could he tell his father what had happened? The weeks of trudging through hell, of fighting for his life, of torture and death, the darkness seeping into his being like a parasite, stealing his body and mind and replacing them with something far more ancient and sinister.

Could Ajax do that to him? He couldn't afford to let the darkness spread, to allow it to corrupt his heart…

But his father was asking him… he sounded like he believed him, that something bad had truly happened, and that his father really did have his best interests at heart. His father wanted to help him, and he couldn't help if he didn't know what was going on… right?

And so, everything spilled out, his fall into the Abyss, meeting a nice lady who was also a swordsman (names were sacred, Skirk had said, and Ajax would always honor his word), and that she taught him how to survive in the Abyss.

Suddenly, the two sworn brothers froze, and shared a horrified look. They were far more familiar with the inner workings of the Abyss Order than the rest of the Knights, having their own personal information circles for their own schemes and agendas, so they weren't surprised the others might not too much about the Abyss.

Jean, Lisa, Amber and Eula were somewhat aware of Collei's situation… so Archon Residue wasn't something new to them (thought Eula hadn't exactly been present, off on her own reconnaissance missions while Collei had been in Mondstadt), but Archon Residue was something the brothers knew more about than the other Knights.

Tartaglia's Abyssal situation had nothing to do with Dottore… but they couldn't help but make a few connections. The older Harbinger was experimenting on Archon Residue, as well as this Crystal Marrow substance, according to the rumors they had heard about Inazuma's Sakoku Decree; Diluc knew that Crystal Marrow was supposedly manifested due to the radiating power from a slain god's remnants after being slain by the Raiden Shogun, and it could also be considered a form of Archon residue.

They weren't too familiar with all the Harbingers, besides Tartaglia, but they had a hunch that Dottore had to be the one behind the manufacturing of all the Delusions; no one else was that smart (they had to admit that, at the very least, since he had originally gotten into Sumeru Acedemia) or psychotic enough to even attempt to create Vision counterparts that sucked the life out of people, using their ambition to power the foul devices and consuming their lifespan (Aether had returned from Inazuma, attempting to drown his sorrows in grape juice, bawling about the death of a guy called Teppei that he was apparently friends with).

And knowing that Tartaglia had fallen into the Abyss, and had gained Abyssal powers in order to survive there… was it possible that Dottore could have attempted to use the Eleventh Harbinger as a lab rat? The Abyss was something the older Harbinger would no doubt be unable to study fully, besides from the Ruin Guards that littered Teyvat... but a fresh source of Abyssal energy, contained within a fourteen year old kid with nothing to his name. There was no way Dottore could pass up that opportunity, especially given all the resources he could use to get what he wanted.

To not only have braved the Abyss, but to also have earned the scrutiny of the crazy mad scientist who would do anything to get his hands on something new and exotic to research, especially something as ancient and vile as the Abyss itself...

If that was truly the case, then Diluc felt even more sorry for Tartaglia despite his hatred for the Fatui. Being turned into Dottore's test subject was something Diluc wouldn't wish upon his worst enemy… actually, scratch that, he would wish that upon Dottore, just so that those who had suffered under his stupid scalpel could get some justice for their pain.

Ajax talked about the monsters that he's seen, that he's fought, that he's slain. Talked about the miasmic darkness that permeated the Abyss, talked about the nightmares that haunted him in the throes of the night.

He watched as his father's expression turned from concern, to confusion, to disbelief, to frowning at his words, almost as if he was wondering how absolutely absurd the story he told was.

Far more absurd than the tales about Theseus or Achilles or even Odysseus.

"No..." Eula muttered mournfully. She didn't like the Harbinger... but no kid deserved to go through all that trauma, only for no one to believe him.

"Children and their colorful imaginations." His father finally shook his head, "Ajax, be serious here."

"I'm not lying." Ajax exclaimed, his heart clenching painfully, "It really did happen. The ground just-"

"If there really was a hole in the ground that led to this so-called Abyss, don't you think more people would have gone missing?" His father pinched the bridge of his nose, "You don't just... come up with stories like this, Ajax. I know you. I know you're not a liar."

With each and every word, Ajax's eyes lost more and more light, like his spirit was slowly being extinguished. A dying candle, flickering about, desperately trying to remain alight within the howling winds of a hurricane.

Zhongli let out an audible whimper, not caring that anyone had heard him. Not that anyone blamed him; even the Inazumans could tell how close the two were, how fond the funeral parlor consultant was of the Harbinger.

I'm not lying, he wanted to scream, but his voice wouldn't come out.

It was just like his dream, where the entity ripped his vocal chords out, except that instead of some cosmic monster, the one doing the ripping was his very own father.

Ajax felt like he was being choked. He could barely breathe, as the horrors of what he witnessed flashed through his mind.

But... his father wouldn't lie...right?

He knew this was serious, Ajax could see that with his own eyes, so perhaps the problem really did lie with him.

He was the problem. He was always the problem; Ajax had been greedy, hadn't been content with what he had. Ajax wasn't happy to be alive, to live peacefully, so he had ran away and paid the price for his greed. And now, he was trying to throw his problems onto other people, to live without fully understanding the consequences of his actions.

How could he be so selfish ?

"No..." Zhongli murmured, pain and dismay creeping into his normally calm voice, "No no no..."

Tartaglia knew that the ex-Archon thought differently, but that was simply the truth; he was selfish, he was living on borrowed time, he knew that he didn't have long to live, and so he tried his best to accomplish as much as he could within his short, pathetic life.

And in turn, swept every up into his hurricane of violence and tragedy and pain. His family, the kids from Liyue, Zhongli, Aether, even those who are stuck in this very room just because of their friendship with Aether.

But he knew he couldn't convince Zhongli of that; the man was as stubborn as a rock, his will as solid as a mountain, and once Zhongli firmly believed in something, it would take a monumental amount of effort to get him to even budge.

"Ajax, listen to me. I don't know what happened to you, and I can't help you if all you're doing is talking about some hole in the ground-"

"You aren't listening to me!" Ajax shrieked, "I'm not lying, it really did happen-"

His father took a step forwards, trying to say something, but Ajax couldn't hear anything over the roaring of blood in his ears. His father's mouth was moving, mouthing something, but Ajax couldn't make out any words.

"The Ajax I know and love-"

"He's gone! The Ajax you know and love is dead!" He screeched, "The Aby... That place, it killed him! I changed... but I'm still Ajax...right...?"

"Oh Archons..." Thoma squeaked.

Ajax looked like he wanted to cry as he looked up at his dad with dead, dead eyes.

"Right?"He asked desperately.

He got no response.

He felt his heart rate quicken as it usually did when he felt threatened, his blood wriggling uncomfortably beneath his skin, like maggots on a piece of rotten flesh, tunneling, eating away at him,whispering, urging him to let the darkness out.

"He doubts you."They cackled,"He doesn't believe you. So blind to the truth, to not even be able to see reality right in front of him!"

Ajax mentally restrained himself, despite the sensation of his blood boiling in his veins, threatening to burn him from the inside out, to rip out of his veins, spilling out of his body in waves, filling up his lungs in corrupted black blood in an attempt to drown himself as he fought against himself.

No, I can't hurt him! He screamed,He's my father!

His father was right. He had to be be right.

But Ajax wasn't lying, he knew that in his very core. How could it all be fake, a nonsensical fairy tale, when the whispers in his head were getting louder, growing into horrendous screams of fury that threatened to tear his mind apart, when every single nerve and muscle in his body was on high alert, feeling threatened by his own father when all he did was take a step towards him.

No one could say anything. How could they, when this was so out of their league?

They didn't have the right to say anything.

"Ajax-"

Before his father could even react, the boy flung the door open so hard that it rattled, stomped out, and ran into the forest as his father ran towards the door, yelling, "Ajax!"

He ran. And ran.

Until he stumbled upon a small lake that had frozen over, and Ajax collapsed, his knees sinking into the snow as his entire body trembled.

"Why won't he believe me?" Ajax whimpered weakly, hugging himself, his nails digging into his skin through his shirt. He hadn't brought a coat out, but he barely felt the cold at all; just the blood boiling beneath his skin, the darkness threatening to seep out through his pores, through any orifice available, and reduce him to nothing but an empty, lifeless husk.

"It's... okay... he doesn't mean it..." Ajax's addled brain tried to make sense of it all, tried to protect himself from the heartbreak, "Maybe it had only been three days... maybe he's just worried and he's just venting..."

But he knew that wasn't the truth, as he looked at his own distorted reflection in the uneven surface of the frozen lake. Because the reality of the situation was... that he really was dead. The Abyss had sucked the life out of him, replaced him with a bloodthirsty monster. The Abyss that ruined his life, now using his own broken body and shattered soul as a conduit to destroy his family.

The darkness that now permeated his very being like a leech, taking and taking andtakinguntil there was nothing left for Ajax.

"You claim you aren't a plaything of The Abyss, but you are nothing." Skirk's words echoed inside his head,"The corruption has taken root, nestled deep within your heart, and your fate has been sealed.Rejecting the darkness will serve no purpose other than harming yourself."

"You will spend the rest of your days chasing a meaningless dream of a life with no reward."

"Do you still wish to go back, knowing nothing awaits but a tragic, painful end?" She had asked.

"You may be with your family, but your family will never be with youeveragain."

Because the Ajax that his family knew and loved was dead, swallowed by the depths. He was just a reminder of what they had lost.

Ajax clamped his hand over his mouth as his throat tightened, bile rising up, threatening to overflow, to corrode his innards and spill them all over the snow in a messy, gruesome masterpiece. His heart throbbed, the emptiness within all the more prominent, a reminder of what had been taken from him.

He wanted to cry, but no tears would come out at all.

Ajax punched the ice, frustration bubbling up in the depths of his very being. Just another reminder of what had been lost.

"You should have listened to her..."The voices hissed in tandem,"You should have stayed... you could have had everything... Don't you miss it?"

"No." Ajax choked, h is breath came out ragged, condensing on the cold air around him in small puffs of fog, "I don't want that. I don't want any of that. I want things to be the way they were before... I just want everything to be normal again..."

"Ah... little Ajax... You don't understand... they should all be dead from the beginning... unleash us... let us make things right..."They purred, and if the boy wasn't so agitated he would have fallen for the facade that maybe,maybethe Abyss wasn't so bad after all.

"No. Shut up!" Ajax screeched, punching the ice, much harder this time. With a crack, fracture lines emerged from where the ice was hit, spreading across the surface like the darkness within him. Pain blossomed from his knuckles, seeping into the ice along the cracks, and all Ajax could do was stare at his own even more deformed reflection, stained with red, the pieces of ice unaligned, breaking up the general shape of a human into an unidentifiable monstrous blob.

Ajax let out a raw, broken cry, a sound born of something within him that will never heal, a shattered soul barely holding itself together with nothing but willpower, only to finally let go and break into pieces after one delicate touch by his own father, knowing that things would never go back to the way it used to, and he will never be with his family ever again.

Chapter 26: A filthy stain

Chapter Text

"Hey... Childe... are you alright?" Aether asked, "This... can't possibly be easy for you..."

"It's fine." Tartaglia clenched his fists as he plastered a fake smile on his face, "I'm fine... you don't have to worry about me..."

"We can take a break, if you like." The blonde traveler offered.

"Look, the sooner we finish, the faster we can get out. It doesn't matter how I feel." Tartaglia stated firmly, "Our priority is to get out of here. With regards to that, my feelings on all of this don't matter."

It was obvious that the Harbinger was upset, that he felt oddly vulnerable, but he was just repeating a line that's been told to him so many times, that even he's started to believe it.

A lie told so many times that it eventually becomes the truth.

"Zhongli, you can't possible think this is-"

Paimon was interrupted as Zhongli cleared his throat, "Do not look at me; Childe is his own person. He should be allowed to have the final say on this situation, and none of us have the right to say otherwise. Should he wish to continue... then that is what we will do."

Clearly, Zhongli wasn't happy with this. He'd like very much for Tartaglia to declare he was done with everything, and just spend some time venting or letting out his sorrows oranythinginstead of bottling it all up. He'd much rather hide the Harbinger away in his home, with the rest of his treasures, safe and sound from the horrors in the world, but that would just be undermining everything Tartaglia had worked and strived so hard for. He did not need anyone to make any decisions for him, and Zhongli respected that, even if it hurts him to watch the Harbinger suffering internally.

Even if they didn't want to admit it, the others were starting to warm up to the Harbinger, and were about to protest, but Albedo crossed his arms, "Very well; then we'll continue. There is no point wasting time arguing over this when he's already made his choice clear."

"But-"

Jean gently shushed Barbara, "Stalling this out won't help anyone. The best we can do is get through this as quickly as possible and get out, then we can help him, okay?"

Barbara paused, before nodding sadly.

Ajax trudged back home, his hands clenched tightly, his nails digging into the palm of his hands, threatening to draw blood.

His father already knew he had issues, there was no need for him to go back, all agitated and jittery, and prove him right, so he continued on his way, dried blood splattered all over his face after he had opted to take his frustration out on a nearby Hilichurl camp. He didn't have his Vision with him, but several unused wooden stakes that the Hilichurls usually used to make barricades were all he needed to get rid of those monsters.

But the blood of the slain had splattered all over his coat, leaving evidence of his actions, but at that point, Ajax was too tired to care. The voices in his head were screaming at him to let them out, to decimate everyone and everything.

"That's why you ran away, wasn't it?"They hissed,"Because you are weak, you are scared. Because you wanted so much more, but knew that you'd amount to nothing."

"Oh, piss off already! Leave him alone!" Keqing huffed, already frustrated, "I'd go psycho too if I had weird voices constantly spouting crap into my ears!"

"Hey, I'm not a psycho!" Tartaglia half-heartedly protested, like he knew that it was true, that he had become something way worse.

"Hey... Childe..." Kaeya started, "Do you... still hear them?"

"I..." Tartaglia paused, pondering the question deeply, before curling in on himself and answering, "It... got better at one point... I suppose? I don't really know..."

Their venomous words continued to echo inside his head, as Ajax pushed the front door open. His parents and older sister were already eating lunch, with a bowl of soup left where he usually sat. A plate of freshly baked pirožkí sat in the middle of the table, seemingly untouched by the trio.

Wordlessly, his father glanced at him, before going back to his meal, while his mother quietly ushered him to go clean up.

Ajax plopped down by his seat and shoveled the tasteless soup into his mouth, trying his best to ignore the burning in his throat as he swallowed each mouthful. He could feel the judging gaze of his father boring into his forehead, and the boy lowered his head even more, attempting to hide his face into his soup, while his mother and sister looked at both of them in confusion, but neither attempted to voice their thoughts.

"Here, Ajax." His mother gently placed a pirožók bun on his plate, "You're still so thin, my dear boy."

She brushed her hand against some dried up blood on his cheek that Ajax didn't wipe off, and the boy had to stifle a flinch, "You really need to stop getting into fights. It's too dangerous!"

"Uh... yeah... too dangerous... for the Hilichurls..." Sara sweatdropped.

Bullsh*t,Ajax thought. The wild animals in Snezhnaya were no match for him, and the same went for the local Hilichurl tribes. He didn't even need his Vision to deal with them, though that did speed up the elimination process greatly; as long as he could get his hands on a wooden stake or one of the broken arrow heads, or maybe even weapons previously left behind by weak adventurers.

Another one of Skirk's teachings; that anything could be used as a weapon. Havingsomethingis better than nothing, whether it was to attack, to block hits, or even just to distract his enemies.

Now, if it was like... five Frostarm Lawachurls, thenmaybeAjax would be a bit more wary.

"... Please don't?" Hutao squeaked, "I think you're going to give Zhongli an aneurysm."

But the boy held his tongue. His mother was just worried, and was looking out for him, like any good parent should.

Ajax was the issue, as always. Ajax was the one filled with so much nervous energy, the one who wanted to attack everyone and everything that so much asflinchedin his vicinity, in fear that they may take action, to jump him in a surprise attack, leaving him even more torn and broken and shattered than before.

"I..." Xingqiu shook his head, "I know that it may be hard for them to understand... but this is justtragic!"

Before he could speak up, Ajax forced the pirožók bun into his mouth. No, his mother didn't deserve his ire. Neither did his father, and especially not his sister, who saw the carnage left in his wake and still chose to love and care for him.

Chose to care about a broken monster from the Abyss, a depraved, defiled soul of a dead child.

They didn't deserve the corruption that permeated his entire being, the pain and darkness that flowed through his veins, bringing about nothing but violence and death.

Heneededthis violence, needed to keep up his training. He needed to make sure that he was strong enough, so that even if he was dragged back into the depths, he wouldn't come back out damaged again.

Because you can't break something that's already broken beyond repair,something inside hissed at him,You can't ever be fixed again, so you'll never break again.

"Using your own insecurities to eat away at your sanity." Ei muttered with distaste, "How vile. The Abyss truly is horrid."

"Oh... Childe..." Zhongli murmured, tightening his grip on the Harbinger as he rested his chin on his shoulder. Unlike Ei... he knew that this wasn't the Abyss.

This was Tartaglia, degrading himself, deeming himself shattered and unfixable; a broken glass with pieces so badly deformed and warped that the shards weren't even recognizable, let alone be reassembled. Perhaps, to him, maybe it would just be easier to melt the shards down into molten glass and make a brand new glass.

"Ajax, please, promise me you'll stop getting into fights." His mother murmured, "We're all worried about you... You changed so much in those three days..."

No, he needed to fight, he had to fight, he had to be strong enough to destroy everything, anything, just in case they lashed out and hurt him or his family. He needed to be stronger than everyone, only then could he finally live in peace, knowing that he could protect his family.

He had to protect them, to make sure that whatever happened to him, never ever happened to them.

Aether and Paimon shared a glance. They knew that the Harbinger wanted to keep his family away from the Fatui business, but having to cover up and hide such a core part of himself (that he didn't ask for)... this was no easy task. To keep the darkness of the Abyss away from his family... even if it meant taking on even more burdens by hiding the truth from his younger siblings.

"I'll do my best." Ajax said instead. He won't make any promises; he would never break a promise, and there was no point in making a promise that he knew he was going to break.

His father sighed tiredly, and his mother smiled, not understanding what Ajax was implying, and the younger boy focused on his food once again, unable to look his mother in the eye.

Not when he knew that all he could do was break their hearts.

Chapter 27: A grave mistake

Chapter Text

Albedo poked the crystal gently before jotting down some notes, "A bit more. Then I think we'll be done for the day."

Tartaglia groaned, "Finally."

Everyone agreed with him. They weren't doing anything, just sitting down, but seeing so much pain and suffering really was exhausting.

Ajax trailed behind his older brother as they roamed around town, his hands full of bags. His brother had some business in that area and needed some extra manpower, so he had roped Ajax in to help.

The younger boy was happy to help, eager to get away from what surely must be disappointed and judgmental stares from his father. Initially reluctant, with Ajax's sudden change in demeanor still worrying him, but his older brother had to visit a more dangerous town, and the pros of having Ajax help him take one trip rather than several seemed to outweigh the cons, in his father's mind.

Not to mention, Ajax's own worries for his older brother was greater than his urge to stay way, to keep the darkness from corrupting his family.

If anything bad happened to his older brother because he was too scared ofhimself, there was no way that Ajax would ever forgive himself.

"Be careful, Ajax." His brother looked down at him, cradling the bags in his arms so he didn't drop them, "We'll make a quick trip, drop these off, and be out of here. People here don't get along too well with each other... not like Morepesok. Just looking at someone wrong can trigger a street fight here."

"Wait... what... street fights?" Chongyun asked, confused.

Ajax wasn't a stranger to street fights; they were very common in Snezhnaya, and could be triggered by anything ranging from a mere insult to accidentally staring at someone for too long. Eagar to protect their honor from what could be considered insults and acts of disrespect, each village had their ways of settling their differences.

But Snezhnaya was a huge country, and while the Tsaritsa was the reigning deity, she was more focused on their military prowess outside of the nation, and as such, rarely interfered when citizens decided to enforce the law in their own less civilized ways, calling on the Fatui for help for any matters that had nothing to do with exterminating monsters was often considered a cowardly move, though if the patrolling Fatui happened to catch wind of a fight, breaking it up was fair game.

Some calmer, more civilized villages would be happy to "fight" it out via arm wrestling or just throwing insults at each other until one side gave up, and other villages like Morepesok had moved on from fighting all together to just talk things out. But other cities would have fully blown street fights, the idea that physical fights being the only way to properly settle disputes deeply ingrained in their culture.

"Oh Archons." Barbara gasped.

Not that Ajax could say anything about it. At least a fight was honest, unlike schemes and plots by masterminds lurking in the shadows, or trying to use words to twist the situation to their own advantage.

The general consensus was that only fists would be allowed in a fair fights, but there were villages who were happy to use anything they could get their hands on in the heat of the moment to get the upper hand in a physical brawl. There were even Fatui agents who were native to these more violent villages who would get into fights if they felt like they had been slighted, obviously when they were off duty and weren't acting as law enforcement.

Some sub-cultures even agree on the place and time to fight over small affair, which would get messy real quick as more and more people joined in and were prepared to set matters aside in order to fight for what they thought was right.

"You Snezhnayans always were so extra." Beidou shook her head in a teasing way. Her comment were met with some snickers from the younger Vision holders, while Tartaglia just rolled his eyes.

"You know... maybe I'm not too keen to visit Snezhnaya..." Aether muttered.

"Hey, you made a pinky promise!" Tartaglia protested, "You'd make Teucer sad if you didn't show up!"

"Yeah but... Urg!" Paimon crossed her arms in frustration, "Why does he have to make sense?!"

And that was the exact kind of village they were in, running some deliveries. Normally, his brother wouldn't even dream of accepting to work in such a dangerous place, but the prices of food were slowly jacking up, and there was a hefty payout for delivering goods to such a vicious place.

"Stay with me." His brother muttered, as he led the way to their destination, "We don't want any trouble here. We'll make it quick, and then go home."

Ajax nodded quietly, before quickening his footsteps to keep pace with his older brother. His eyes flicked about warily, his heart pounding in his chest. Something about this village just... made him uneasy, like a fight was about to break out any second.

He knew that there wasn't anything to worry about, and if anything happened, he would be more than willing to protect his brother... but he couldn't help but worry. His brother was the one who initially taught him how to wield a shortsword... but as far as Ajax knew, he hadn't been in any real fights.

He hadn't fallen into the Abyss, hadn't died and been corrupted and been eaten from the inside out.

Hadn't been torn apart so many times that there wasn't anything left.

Ajax wanted to protect that. His family was everything to him. It wasn't their fault that Ajax was selfish and unsatisfied with life; they were doing the best they could, given their circ*mstances. Ajax couldn't let his mistakes affect his family, couldn't let the corruption that ran rampant in his veins destroy what he held dear.

Passing by the market, where several stalls selling various fresh produce and animal products were set up, extending into the various alleyways. A large crowd had gathered in one of them, where some yelling and shouting could be heard.

"I said I wanted this one!"

"And I said that I'm holding it for someone already!"

"I picked this out first! Do you have no respect for others?"

"Oh... that... doesn't sound good..." Ganyu looked at the scene worriedly.

Curiously, Ajax took a peek at the commotion, trying to tiptoe to get a better look without dropping whatever was in his hands, but his older brother lightly kicked his leg.

"How about... not..." He muttered.

"Yes. Get out of there." Ayaka nodded, her fists clenched tightly.

Ajax wasn't one to shy away from conflict, but ultimately, he listened to his older brother. After all, he was only here to accompany his brother and help him out. If he were to get into a fight now, with his brother right next to him…

"I don't care that you're part of the Fatui!" One man snapped, "If you're a Fatuus, then all the more you should respect that you don't get priority over others just because you have more money!"

"Stop being a f*cking asshole!" Another growled, "If you have so much Mora, then go somewhere else to buy things,Козёл! Don't think you can ruin other people's lives just because you have more money!"

"Иди в баню! Go take your business elsewhere! You're rich now, aren't you,мент?"

"What does that mean?" Hutao asked, curiously, "We don't speak Snezhnayan."

"Trust me... You don't want to know." Tartaglia pinched the bridge of his nose, before glancing at Qiqi and sighing, "Snezhnayan can be... rathercolorful."

"Urg... They are always like this." His older brother muttered. He had already explained the situation beforehand; the people here had far poorer living conditions compared to in Morepesok, and often clashed with each other over the most basic supplies.

With the frequent yet unpredictable snowstorms, it was very easy for even the most hardy of crops to be buried under layers and layers of frost, rendering them inedible. There were many times where there was just a massive shortage of food, resulting in prices to rise, and yet, everyone did their best to make do, from braving the elements to hunt down wild animals, to traveling to a neighboring village that may be lucky enough to have avoided the natural disasters that destroyed their crops.

And yet, a big problem was the Fatui; soldiers who have returned home with hard-earned Mora, and were able to help their own individual families, wanting to purchase sufficient supplies for their parents and siblings, and perhaps even their significant other's families, as well as any children they may have. With their abundance of Mora, they are able to buy more supplies than they needed to keep their families comfortable, all while ignoring the plights of the others, and their brewing resentment.

Sara frowned. She did understand that the Fatui weren't being malicious, and that family was a big part of Snezhnayan culture... but if she knew that the people were suffering due to factors far outside their control, she surely would help them.

Like when the Sakoku Decree had just started; she had been working with the Yashiro Commission to make the transition easier for the inhabitants of Narukami Island, who had to adapt to suddenly not being able to get foreign imports for their businesses.

Obviously, while the Fatui were supposed to keep the peace, they are part of the problem, even if it was out of love for their own families. This was one of the few villages where there was no trust in law and order, and almost all verbal conflicts ended up escalating into physical altercations, for strength in battle equaled to respect, and the weak were trampled over; so if they could work something out during the fight, things usually went well.

But fights didn't usually end until someone throws in the towel, or one party is so brutally injured that they legitimately cannot fight anymore. These fights are usually ignored by the Fatui, because if they had to intervene for every single fight that occurred, they'd most likely be down half their manpower just breaking up fights between civilians.

"No wonder you're so f*cked up in the head." Kaeya muttered, looking at Tartaglia coyly while resting his chin on his hand like he were a king.

"I... no... what?" The Harbinger spluttered, "Shut up."

"I mean... this is a pretty bad situation..." Amber admitted, "Fighting over basic supplies... aren't you going to need more supplies after that?"

"Fighting isn't going to solve the problem... doesn't that just... create more problems?" Gorou's ears flicked uneasily. Sure, they had been short on supplies during the Vision Hunt Decree... but they rationed their food and medical supplies well. There wasn't any in-fighting among the troops... just how bad was the situation in Snezhnaya?

"That's just Snezhnaya for you. There's just... more fighting in some places." Tartaglia shrugged helplessly, trying not to cringe under all the attention; it was an odd feeling. He usually liked being in the spotlight, and even the usual judging gazes he got from being a Harbinger never bothered him. But sharing something so personal... with people who were pretty much still strangers... not that he didn't trust Aether, but he barely knew anyone in the room.

"Interesting..." Albedo murmured, writing down some notes, before noticing all the questionable glares he was getting, "What? I'm not saying this is a good situation. If anything, I just want to see how Snezhnayan culture differs from ours."

"You have Tartaglia?" Kazuha raised an eyebrow.

"Does he really count, though?" Albedo asked back. No one had an answer for him.

Ajax had gotten distracted by something, but it wasn't long before the argument had escalated into an all-out brawl; he swore it couldn't be more than a minute or two since they first heard the yelling, but his own sense of time had long since been warped and distorted by the depths.

"Иди на хуй!"

"Перхоть подзалупная!"

Insults and slurs were being thrown around, as were weapons. Ajax swore he saw the glint of a knife as other off-duty Fatui tried to back up their colleague, bringing out their weapons, but civilians weren't backing down either, with their own hunting or farming equipment being used as weapons. The fight was getting bigger and bigger, as more people joined in, spreading from the alleyways to the main streets, with people yelling aggressively over each other.

Various items were being thrown about, and his older brother narrowly dodged an empty wooden food crate that had been yeeted from somewhere, the box flying harmlessly between them and landing behind them in the snow.

"Чтоб тебе дети в суп срали!"Someone spat,"Хуй с горы!"

"Oh... wow..." Venti winced at the language, "That... uh... surely is something..."

"You understand Snezhnayan?" Chongyun asked, before realization hit him, "Oh yeah... you're... uh... my bad?"

Venti just laughed it off.

Others weren't so lucky. Women started herding children away from the brewing fight, as the weaker battles were knocked out in the ensuing fight, literally getting trampled underfoot by angry, vicious people who did not hold back when pulling their punches.

" Чтоб у тебя хуй во лбу вырос! "The first Fatui soldier snarled back, but Ajax wasn't too sure what exactly was going on, with his vision being obscured by literally everyone else fighting.

"Let's go. TheseМудак." His older brother hissed under his breath, glaring at the crate that could have given him a concussion with disdain, "This is getting ridiculous. Fighting over basic supplies isn't going to help anyone."

Ayato visibly flinched. He had to agree, thiswas a rather ridiculous situation, thought it was very understandable. Their judgement clouded by their emotions, driven by the desperation to survive and provide for their family, to ensure that no one starved to death in the blazing cold of their homeland.

He had been like that, long time ago, fighting to keep the vestiges of the Kamisato Clan alive. He was still like that now, doing his best to shield his family from the manipulation of the other clans.

Thoma gently pat him on the shoulder. Now that they were out of Inazuma, away from the manipulation and corruption and pretty much everything that stressed Ayato out to the Abyss and back, surrounded by Aether's friends... Ayato's facade was slipping. Not that Thoma didn't think that was a good thing; the Yashiro Commissioner spent far too much time being wary of everything and anything; after all, the other clans would no doubt be waiting for him to make a mistake, and gobble it up like rabid dogs.

Ayato had spent far too longneedingto be perfect; he deserved to take a break.

He was just about to tug Ajax away, when someone was tossed their way, collapsing by their feet with a swollen eye and a dislocated jaw, with his particular aggressor in close pursuit, a shovel in hand.

Seeing Ajax and his older brother with various bags in their arms, he turned his attention onto them, instead of the bloodied man, who was pushing himself up like he didn't have a broken face and brain damage, cracking his knuckles, unwilling to go down so easily, but was easily knocked away with a good hit from the shovel to his knee.

Ajax growled, as the other man swung his shovel. With his arms full, his older brother took a step back, and narrowly avoided being brained by a shovel, before digging his foot into the man's stomach and harshly pushed him away.

"Nice move!" Xingqiu cheered.

But all he saw was someone attempting to assault his brother, and Ajax saw red.

Maybe it was the blood dripping to the ground, as the man clutched his broken nose, struggling to stand up, using his shovel as a support, but Ajax kicked the shovel away and punched him again, as goods fell to the ground.

"Ajax?" His older brother blinked confused, as the crowd thinned, with more and more people getting thrown out of the fight, leaving only the best fighters to duke it out.

It wasn't long before they noticed the siblings, one of them with goods in his hands, slightly confused as he stared at the man on the ground, crimson flowing from his face onto ground and staining the snow beneath, the other with blood dripping from his knuckles as he snarled at the downed man.

Tossing the stall owner away and smashing his head against a brick wall, the young Fatui trainee turned his gaze towards Ajax, fury burning in his eyes. Some of the other off-duty Fatui soldiers were slumped over, down from the count, as were many others, but there was still quite a few people left standing, ready to fight to the end for the survival of their families.

"Я бы вас послал, да вижу вы оттуда!"

Zhongli winced at the vulgar language. That wasdefinitelygoing to be a sore spot for Tartaglia; the boy loved his family too much, and could take insults towards himself. But one wrong word about his family, and there was no doubt that the Harbinger would take that personally.

He shared a glance with Tartaglia, and the younger man just shrugged weakly. Not like he could do anything about it now; that was all in the past.

"You want to say that again?" Ajax growled, taking a threatening step forwards.

"I'll say it as many times as you want." The other man sneered, "I-"

A fist to the face immediately shut him up, and he stumbled backwards, whipping out a pocket knife, but Ajax pushed him back, snatching it out of his hand before plunging it into his leg, watching as he collapsed to the ground, blood spilling out of the wound.

Such a vibrate shade of red...

So full of life...

His heart pounded as the others accessed the newest threat, and he jumped back as an axe came down from where he was previously standing. He ducked as the axe was heaved out of the ground and came cleaving sideways, before he kicked the man's leg, making his knee buckle, before rushing forwards to engage the others.

Ajax was a monster; whirling through the crowd like a hurricane, taking down everyone in his path, letting out weeks of frustration, bottling up all his emotions so his family didn't see him break down. Weeks of sneaking out to kill Hilichurls, decimating the camps until nothing remained, to hide his injuries and bruises from when he had gotten overconfident, and had earned the butt of a Mitachurl axe to his gut.

Months of looking at himself, and seeing nothing good and all the bad. He saw the broken shards of a boy that his father wanted back, a soul that had long been lost to the depths of the pit, devoured by the darkness, never to return.

H e saw smiles of a dead boy that he tried to recreate, to placate his mother whenever she saw him looking down, but the light never really reached his eyes anymore, no matter how bright his surroundings were.

Someone got a lucky hit in, elbowing him in the gut, but that did nothing to deter the boy, who sidestepped an attack with a knife, before turning around, grabbing the arm with the blade, and pushing the momentum forward, digging the blade into someone else's side.

"It's not the worst coping mechanism, I guess?" Kokomi stammered in awe. She didn't necessarily like violence, but she's loved battle strategy ever since she was young, but for strategies to be carried out, competent soldiers were needed.

The Watatsumi Army had many good men... but to see someone of such a high caliber, at such a young age... well, it did bother her greatly, but still, even she could appreciate such prowess.

Everything was a blur, a dash of red against a snowy backdrop, but for Ajax, everything was so clear, so vibrant. There was so much that Ajax could see, like he had just opened his eyes, the chilly atmosphere hurting his eyes like the pricking of needles, but the pain was worth it.

The emptiness that filled his soul was now gone, and he could feel so,somuch.

He was alive. He could feel it, as he took a deep breath of cold fresh air, scalding his damaged lungs that had long been destroyed by the acrid air of the Abyss. His muscles screamed from the exertion, blood pulsing through his veins rhythmically.

The pain from living, from improving, from pushing past difficulties and still coming out of top.

This wasn't the Abyss. He had long since left the Abyss behind. The corruption that flowed through his body did nothing but hinder him, destroying him from the inside out.

His Vision, stuffed in his pocket, practicallybeggingto be used, but the boy ignored it.

Not the Abyss. Not Celestia.

This was his strength, and his strength alone.

Ajax let out a wild cackle at the realization, all his worries bubbling out of him in white puffs of condensed air that escaped from his mouth as he wiped some blood off his face with his sleeve.

This was the strength he had, his proof of being alive.

He earned his right to live, to survive, and he reveled in the sight of his enemies, lying on the ground, bloodied and broken, still breathing, but labored.

This was the strength he had, strength that he could use to protect his family.

But he turned around, noticing the shocked, horrified look on his brother's face at the carnage. He saw too much; the wrinkles on his forehead, the creases lining his eyes, hollow cheeks as his brother sucked air as he properly processed the situation.

Tired eyes that flicked from the blood strewn all over, to the fourteen year old boy, to the bodies lying on the ground, back to the boy. No matter where his brother looked, his gaze always strayed back to him, the root of the problem.

Protect his family... could he really do that?

Perhaps his family didn't need protecting.

Not when the monster he had to protect them from was himself.

Chapter 28: Pretend My Pain Away

Chapter Text

The lights flickered back on, but no one seemed willing to talk. They just looked at each other mutely, occasionally flicking towards the dejected Harbinger, before averting their gaze to look at someone else.

Kazuha thought that having Aether, Paimon, Mona, Fischl and Xinyan seeing his past in that mirage domain was already a little invasive (not that he blamed them, that was the magic of the islands), but that mirage had been a marvelous dreamscape, weaving the past they lived through into a majestic realm, a fantastical retelling of the stories of their lives.

It allowed them to see their pasts with a new light; from Xinyan's hobbies being rejected and scorned by those all around her, to the harassment Mona faced due to her laying out all the facts with astrology, from the downfall of his clan and the death of his friend, to Fischl's insecurity about her own identity, torn between reality and fiction.

Because there was no way they could make the past okay; it was already messed up. It was about accepting the past as what it was, accepting that it had happened, that it had shaped them into who they were currently, and living the future as best as they could.

But this wasn't such a simple solution. Ever since getting out of the Abyss, the poor boy had been suffering all on his own, and his family couldn't even begin to understand the pain that the boy was going through, nor his coping mechanisms.

How could he heal, when even his family wasn't able to properly understand and help him? How could he begin to heal when everyone just disregarded his pain? Escaping from a place that breeds pain and hatred and resentment into one's very soul, an incomprehensible force that is even capable of destroying gods and illuminated beasts...

Suddenly, Zhongli stood up, gently tugging Tartaglia up with him, "I will go and check on my soup. We can start dinner soon. You can be my taste-tester."

With that, the ex-archon dragged the Harbinger into the teapot, with no resistance from the latter, and after a bit more silence, eventually, Ningguang suggested drawing lots for the night once more.

It was decided that Jean, Aether, Noelle, Venti, Xiao, Amber, Paimon and Yae would be staying in the teapot, but Amber graciously gave her slot up to Ei so the two Inazuma Electro ladies could be together (also because Yae was the only one who could keep Ei in check, and Eula wasn't going to be in the teapot either, but she kept that part to herself).

Once again, Noelle and Thoma volunteered to cook, Aether vehemently refused, and Eula decided that it was her turn to fix up dinner, dragging Amber along with her.

"Hmph, delicious delicacies... you will all pay for this!" She declared, puffing up her chest proudly as she disappeared into the teapot, "This transgression will not go unnoticed! Mark my words, vengeance will be mine!"

Thoma blinked at her, before turning to Amber, "Is she... always like this?"

"That's just Eula's way of saying that she's going to cook a sumptuous feast. Her cooking is really good, trust me!" Amber nodded excitedly, doing her best to try and lift the mood, "Oh, that Stormcrest Pie is the most delicious thing you could ever taste..."

She continued chattering on about Eula's cooking and how nice a person Eula actually was beneath her icy exterior, and Ayaka decided that she wanted to try and make friends with her, thinking that they were rather similar despite their differing circ*mstances, and dragged Qiqi along with her.

Ganyu was quite happy to let the Kamisato girl take charge of Qiqi, since she seemed rather fond of the little Cryo user, and the zombie didn't seem to mind too much; plus, Keqing did want to talk to her regarding some Liyue matters.

Of course, Thoma tagged along to keep Ayaka company (and totally not because he was going to sneak in some extra cooking).

"You know..." Paimon not-so-quietly whispered to Aether, who was cooking some Biryani, "Paimon hopes that Childe will be alright. Paimon knows that this is different from what happened in Sumeru... but after what happened to Dunyarzad... Paimon can't help but be worried..."

Aether sighed, and glanced at the teapot, "Yeah. I hope he'll be okay..."

Ajax slumped over the table, away from the prying eyes of the others, staring blankly as Zhongli took a whiff of his soup, adding a bit more seasoning and stirring it around a bit more, before grabbing a spoon to take a small sip of his dish. Satisfied, he ladled out the soup into a small bowl, before placing it in front of the Harbinger.

"Childe?" Zhongli nudged his shoulder gently, waiting patiently as the ginger groaned, looking up at him tiredly, "Come on, have some soup. It will warm you up."

Slowly pushing himself up, Ajax carefully pulled the bowl of soup towards himself, warming his gloved hands on the surface of the warm bowl as Zhongli passed him a spoon, but the younger just opted to use his bowl as a heat pack, and made no attempts to drink his soup.

"I know this hasn't been a good experience for you..." Zhongli slipped into the seat beside the Harbinger, "Do you... wish to talk about it? In my experience, talking about problems is a good way to resolve them... right?"

Ajax just sighed, and slumped forwards ever so slightly, "I'm just... worried... how long do we have to stay here? How much... do we have to see..."

Zhongli frowned slightly, "Is there... something you're afraid to let the others see? I know this is a very personal experience for you, but from how you worded it... it doesn't seem like you're worried about. Is it something to do with the Fatui?"

Ajax looked up at Zhongli, lookingso tired and so done with everything.

Zhongli decided he did not like that look on the young man. He hated it, detested it, and he'd do anything in his power to never have to see Ajax make that expression ever again.

"I suppose so? Like... you know...that placealready has the reputation and stuff so I supposed while it might be... well...graphic... it's not the most unexpected thing?" Ajax pulled the bowl closer to himself, like it was the only heat source left in the entire world, "And the Fatui..."

He took a deep breath, "It... it's not the best thing... andдедовщинаisn't exactly the easiest to-"

"Hmm... do you think that they would like Goulash or Cream Stew?"

"Well... Mr Zhongli is already cooking some Bamboo Shoot Soup, right? Maybe we should make more solid dishes instead of the stews."

"Oh, it's Amber." Childe muttered, straightening his back and patting down his uniform.

Zhongli knew Snezhnayan, and understood the direct translation of the word... but it didn't make any sense to him in the slightest, probably due to their cultural differences and the language barrier. But he could tell that it clearly bothered Childe... bothered him enough that he brought it up with minimal prying.

The Adeptus had to resist the urge to glare as the duo pushed open the kitchen door, knowing that they had no idea what was going on.

Still, Ajax had been opening up about some problems and they just...ruined it. The dragon huffed internally, frustration bubbling in his gut, all the while looking perfectly impassive to anyone even if they knew the man.

"Good point." Eula replied, "I suppose we'll make do with some Northern Smoked Chicken, a Sunshine Sprat... hmm... maybe a Sticky Honey Roast as well...not because you like it or anything, I just think it is a filling meal..."

"Of course!" Amber grinned.

"Your Champion Steak would compliment my dishes nicely." Eula also decided, noticing Childe sitting by the table and tilting her head, "Perhaps I should make someGebratenes Fleisch mit Sauerkrautas well."

"Yuck! Not theGebratenes Fleisch mit Vengeance!"

"Gebrate Fleshwhat now?" Childe blinked, dumbfounded.

"It is a roasted meat dish with sauerkraut." Zhongli explained, "However, it is not very popular due to the sourness of the sauerkraut. Admittedly, I have not heard the name of this dish in a long time. Supposedly, it was the favorite dish of Mondstadt aristocrats many decades ago. I must admit though... I am not particularly fond of the dish, last time I tried it."

Childe laughed, but it sounded hollow, empty. Eula frowned, crossing her arms, but decided it wasn't the right time to comment any further. Instead, she started rummaging through the shelves, looking for appropriate ingredients for her dish, and Zhongli went to help her as Amber looked at Childe weirdly.

"Hmm..." The Pyro archer huffed, before grabbing Baron Bunny.

"Ah... hey!" Childe yelped, staring at the toy warily. The stuffed toy looked just like one of those explosive puppets that Amber used to distract enemies, and while he knew that Amber probably wouldn't hurt him (not like she could anyways), he had no idea what Amber was trying to do with it, "This won't explode... right?"

"Nope! This is a special one filled with duck down. My regular Baron Bunnies have Pyro Slime Condensate in them." Amber reassured him, shoving it in Childe's arms, "He'll keep you company for a bit."

Blinking owlishly, Childe wrapped his arms around the stuffed toy, though he was careful to avoid touching its feet; Amber did tell him that this wasn't an explosive doll... but just to be sure...

He had to admit, it was nice and warm though...

He missed his narwhale plush, which was probably sitting in his office in the Northland Bank, which also doubled as his apartment, waiting for him to come back. His men had laughed at him when they noticed the plush sitting on his bed, but one mention that it reminded him of his family was enough to stop all the laughter; Snezhnayans were family people, and everyone had their own share of trinkets that reminded them of home.

Amber smiled warmly at him, before rushing off to help Eula cook. Childe just stared at the plush, then at his bamboo shoot soup, reaching out to pick up his spoon.

Zhongli peered at his soup, using his chopsticks to pick out some bamboo shoots. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Childe frowning, chopsticks in hand, as he attempted to pick up a dumpling. Somehow, Xingqiu and Hutao had goaded him into using his chopsticks for his entire meal, cheering him on as he attempted to pick up the dumpling.

Venti had also joined in at some point, strumming out a ballad that was either encouraging or mocking Childe, Zhongli couldn't really figure it out.

The ex-Archon watched as the Harbinger tried to bring the food item to his mouth, his hand shaking for a good ten minutes, only to lose his grip and drop his dumpling.

The dumpling landed on his plate with a pathetic splat.

"Director Hu, Xingqiu, please leave Childe alone." Zhongli took a sip of his tea, before reaching over to help Childe re-adjust his grip on his chopsticks.

"Yeah! He's right." Chongyun huffed, drinking a glass of iced tea, "Leave him alone."

"Xiansheng, it's alright!" Childe smiled, but it was strained, fake, the light never seeming to reach his eyes despite how brightly lit the room was.

Xingqiu didn't seem to pick up on it, and grinned, "Awww, come on, Yun-Yun It's good practice!"

"Aiya, Chongyun! You know, he's got to have good chopstick skills sooner or later!" Hutao skipped around gleefully, "My, if I had to hear Ms Ekaterina grumbling about acertain someonewaxing poetry about acertain consultant-"

Ningguang nearly choked on her Grilled Unagi Fillet as Hutao rambled on, and Beidou patted her on the back, calling for a cup of water that Albdeo kindly fetched for her. The Tianquan of the Liyue Qixing gulped down some water, before turning to glare daggers at the oblivious funeral director, with Yae laughing at her while Ei remained impassively stoic.

"I certainly doNOTwax poetry-"

"I wasn't talking about you, lover boy!"

"You mentioned Ekaterina! Who else could you be referring to? And stop giving me dumb nicknames!"

"I call you whatever I want, MrFatuus!"

Kokomi, Noelle, Gorou and Barbara were having a small conversation in the corner, while Jean hung out with Kaeya and Diluc, occasionally stealing glances towards Barbara to make sure her younger sister was okay.

She probably was glad that her kind, sweet little sister was making some friends, Zhongli mused. He was quite familiar with Yunjin and Xinyan, who were both performers, much like Barbara. Yunjin was very well-known and popular while Xinyan mostly dealt with the negative backlash of fame (her musicwas verygood, just that it wasn't something most people were used to), he could understand that Barbara might have a lot of followers and people who looked up to her, but no one who really liked Barbara for who she was.

Zhongli watched again as Childe attempted, and failed, to pick up his dumpling ten more times, with Ayato snickering in the background, watching the Snezhnayan fail, all the while sipping boba tea (where in Teyvat did he get that while they were tall trapped in some weird Ley Line disorder?) with Qiqi.

He wasn't sure if Qiqi liked boba tea, but he supposed coconut milk will still be her go-to drink.

"Cocogoat! Cocogo-!" Childe clutched his sides as he hunched over, choking on his own laughter, like he has never truly laughed before, to the point where his own tongue was a choking hazard, "Aha ha... ow my sides hurt... Oh my goodness, I cannot BELIEVE you fell for that!"

"Hey! Less laughter, more sympathy!" Paimon shrieked, neither her norAether looking too amused in the slightest, glaring at the Harbginer for having the f*cking audacity to laugh at them when Zhongli, the supposed Liyue expert, didn't even know what to do.

Zhongli raised an eyebrow at him, not understanding what was so funny, and Childe grinned back at him, tears glistening in his eyes from just how hard he was laughing. His eyes gleamed, life dancing in his irises, as Childe attempted to calm himself, before bursting into another fit of laughter.

Now that was a genuine smile, not whatever Childe was doing to keep up the facade that he was perfectly alright, that everything that had been shown wasn't affecting him in some way, shape, or form.

Keqing, Sara, Kazuha and Ganyu were talking, occasionally peeking over to watch Childe fail another two times at trying to pick up that same cursed dumpling.

The Harbinger glared at the dumpling like it was some kind of vicious enemy he had to vanquish, using his chopsticks to shakily pick the dumpling up, but after falling onto Childe's plate for the umpteenth time over the span of dinner, the dough wrap finally gave up, spilling the vegetable and meat filling of the dumpling onto the plate like the innards of a slaughtered animal.

Xiao rolled his eyes, "Stop playing with your food. You're disrespecting the cooks."

Childe's expression changed, ever so slightly, sadness flickering across his face so quickly that barely anyone noticed it, before he plastered a grin across his face, "Okay, okay, Xiao. I'll practice using my chopsticks some other time!"

As Childe slurped up the lone dumpling on his plate, taking another bowl of bamboo shoot soup, before declaring that he was full, and spent the rest of dinner trying to figure out how to hold his chopsticks properly, Zhongli noticed that... the Harbinger hadn't really eaten much of anything at all.

He wasn't going to forced the Harbinger to eat; the last thing he wanted was for Childe to get sick when he was already stressed out. Plus, he's had his own share of episodes where he just refused to eat, and it would be kind of hypocritical if he called Childe out for that too.

A smile on his face as the Liyuen teens (and an annoying bard) teased him for his poor chopstick skills, Childe looked so different from when it was just the both of them in the kitchen. And yet... they looked so strikingly similar, the pain in the Harbinger's eyes as he forced himself to smile, to make sure that the darkness that ate away at his heart wouldn't infect the other younger Vision Holders.

A darkness that didn't necessarily stem from the Abyss.

Chapter 29: Can I ever go back?

Chapter Text

Tartaglia woke with a start.

The leaders of Mondstadt, Liyue and Inazuma had crammed themselves into the teapot the previous night to discuss business matters, and Tartaglia had been too tired to even bother with them; not that he was the best person to discuss trade with anyways, nor did he even want to talk politics or all that annoying crap. He had just tucked the blankets around himself and flopped down on the couch, closing his eyes and forcing himself to sleep.

He had eventually drifted off, but he had woken up after yet another nightmare, and now he was stuck in a darkened room, staring up at the ceiling. There was a weight by his side, and upon further inspection, he realized that Qiqi was the one who had cuddled up to him in the middle of the night.

Man, he must have been absolutelydrainedif Qiqi of all people (or zombies?) was able to sneak up on him in his sleep, knowing that due to being... well...dead, the littlejiangshiwasn't exactly the most subtle person out there.

He supposed that he was lucky; sometimes he thrashed in his sleep while having nightmares, and with his strength, there was no doubt he would have injured Qiqi had he unintentionally done so.

Patting her hair gently and being careful not to touch the paper talismans on her head, Childe sighed, and pushed himself up. Everyone was fast asleep, and Childe didn't really have the heart to bother anyone, so he just pulled her in closer so she didn't fall off the couch by accident, feeling her clinging to his shirt gently as he yanked the blanket around them both.

He felt a piercing gaze, and glanced downwards, noticing that Zhongli had turned on his side, and was looking up at him, his amber eyes glowing in the dark.

"I thought you had fallen asleep already." He rumbled softly, "Are you okay up there?"

"Yeah." Childe mutely answered. He wasn't going to admit he had a nightmare, not when he was being forced to bare his memories out for everyone to see. It was taking its toll, and he just felt so raw, so exposed, everything was just too loud, and he couldn't help but watch everyone's reactions, secretly judging him for all his misfortunes.

It wasn't nice letting everyone see something so deeply personal, and Childe was glad that at the very least, these were Aether's friends, who had the most basic sense of dignity, because if it were the Fatui or the Harbingers who were here with him, they'd most likely laugh at him for being soft, and tell him"Boo hoo, tough cookies, f*cking deal with it"and then continue to laugh at him alongside all their friends while making him clean the communal toilets for a month, and maybe dragging in some juniors who would half-heartedly join in, in fear of being mercilessly punished for disobedience.

Ajax groaned softly to himself; he was NOT looking forward to that part of his memories. He's already made peace with his past, and if he went back in time, he would still repeat his actions, because he refused to be a push-over and let everyone trample over him. He resisted the dark hold of the Abyss and everything it had promised him, and he wouldn't let some stupid self-absorbed superiors who had inflated egos win.

But did he really want to let the others see that? Especially those who were still young, and had their lives ahead of them. Xingqiu, Chongyun, Barbara... even Hutao and Gorou. Hutao was no stranger to death, and Gorou has even been in Inazuma's civil war, but Ajax couldn't help but be worried if they had to witness that part of his past.

And Qiqi... poor little Qiqi. Her poor memory had constantly been a hindrance, and it had taken them months for Qiqi to even remember him (to be fair, the fact that he visited almost twice a week for his father's wind chill medication probably helped, and even more if his men had gotten into rougher scuffles during debt collection or the various monsters that roamed Liyue's countryside).

For once, maybe her poor memory was finally a blessing. He didn't want her to scar her for life... though being deadprobably did that already...

Dark jokes aside, he could see the worry flashing through eyes the shade of molten Mora. He had nearly told the older man about this potential issue before they were interrupted but Eula and Amber, and now, he just couldn't find it in him to broach the subject again.

Qiqi shifted slightly in his arms, and Ajax gently patted her head, and untangled her usually-braided hair so they didn't rip one of the many talismans that adorned her outfit.

Zhongli quietly stood up, grabbing the blanket, before gingerly sitting down next to Ajax, making sure not to wake the little zombie. Settling down comfortably, the ex-Archon draped the blanket over them both, and leaned back into the couch.

"Good night, Childe."

"I already have a blanket." Ajax wiggled slightly, as a the god hummed non-committedly but made no signs of removing the blanket or moving.

Sighing, Ajax just rested his head on Zhongli's shoulder, and closed his eyes.

"Good night, Zhongli."

When Ayato woke up, Thoma was already up and grilling something on the stove that Aether had left outside.

"Ah! My Lord!" The Pyro user smiled up at him, "You sure are up early?"

Ayato let out a genuine laugh. Even in the safety of his own home, or even in his office, he would never know if someone was trying to assassinate him, or one of his own staff was secretly leaking information to other commissions despite a thorough background check, and so, Ayato had never been able to truly able to relax and not have to worry about his image.

Every day had been a political struggle, something Ayato hated, and he was quite glad that at least Chisato and Kamaji had taken over the Hiiragi and Kujou clans; at least they were reasonable and didn't spend their entire lives trying to climb the social hierarchy, so keeping the power balance has been rather easy after Aether's assistance with that whole wedding fiasco.

He's been a bit high-strung when they had first been deposited in this weird pocket dimension, unsure if this was some kind of Abyss Order plot that they had to look out for, but eventually he's accepted that this was just an accident and there wasn't anyone who wanted to destroy his clan or disrupt Inazuma's stability.

Well, except for the Harbinger, who was the biggest threat so far after the Vision Hunt Decree, but he trusted Aether, Ayaka and Thoma's judgements, and the man didn't seem like the type to be bothered by political shenanigans. Tartaglia hated schemes, trickery, lies and petty tricks, and preferred to solve each problem with a fight.

Plus, the youngest Harbinger may be dangerous, but he wasn't an actor. Ayato could easily see through his facade, and all was left was a boy who never had the opportunity to enjoy his youth, who had been thrown into deep end and was left to fend for himself.

He decided he quite liked Tartaglia; having another person who also didn't bother with all that superfluous nonsense was quite welcome. And maybe he understood the burden of being forced to grow up too quickly.

Now, temporarily free from his duties and shackles that he had forced upon himself by taking up the mantle of the Kamisato Commissioner, he was going to make the best use of this time before he was chained back to desk, days filled with the endless task of filing paperwork from other unruly clans who wanted to usurp him from his position.

Ayaka was still fast asleep, and Ayato gently draped the blanket over her to keep her warm, before walking over to Thoma, "Hmmm? What is this? I believe I've seen the others make this before... but I didn't quite catch the name..."

"Oh, this is Fisherman's Toast! It's a Mondstadt dish, and Eula kindly taught me how to make it!" Thoma grinned, "It would take a few tries for me to master it, but that's one moreexoticdish for you to try!"

"I'll be looking forward to that." Ayato smiled amicably, "Your cooking is always the highlight of my day."

"EH!?" Thoma turned red, and nearly dumped his toast directly onto the fire, "My Lord, you can't just say stuff like that-"

"What? Complimenting you? You should be no stranger to compliments; after all, the entirety of Inazuma is probably indebted to you in some way, shape or form, whether it be directly or indirectly." Ayato chuckled, but Thoma just shook his head, "No, not that... but coming from you..."

"Just accept the compliment." Ayato grinned, "You know I don't have the opportunity to openly give them out."

Thoma laughed, though it sounded a little strained. But he didn't voice his concerns, and went back to grilling his Fisherman's Toast.

Ayato smiled faltered, and he lowered his head slightly. He hated how being the head of his clan has essentially driven everyone away from him. Or rather, he had pushed everyone away. Ayaka had been too young... and Thoma... as a non-Inazuman, his situation was even more delicate, and one wrong move could bring everything crashing down on them and would completely destroy them; pushing him away had been the safer, albeit more painful option, and Ayato felt that if Thoma hadn't washed up on Inazuma's shore looking for his father, the entirety of Inazuma would long have destroyed itself.

Thoma was just too nice, from helping the elderly, to running various errands; anything that he could do to help the clan, Thoma would have already done it. Just like he knitted tiny jumpers for the strays, Thoma had strung everyone along into a tight-knit community; people who trusted each other more due to their interactions through Thoma, and dealing with civil and festival affairs had never been easier when people here and there owed Thoma a favor, or they were willing to help out just because Thoma was the one doing the asking.

And now, there was something on Thoma's mind, but there were many things that Ayato felt could be concern to the housekeeper, and he wasn't sure which one it was. Usually, he was very good at reading the Pyro user... and Thoma usually offered up his thoughts whenever he felt that Ayato might be curious.

But he didn't want to be Yashiro Commissioner Kamisato Ayato. He just wanted to be Ayato; the same Ayato who had befriended Thoma before dragging him back to be hired by the Kamisato Clan. He wanted to be the Ayato who studied meticulously, and spent the rest of his free time playing tag with Thoma and Ayaka in the courtyard or talking about various cool martial art skills, their parents watching from the side with a serving of tea.

And just being Ayato meant that he would just wait. He'll wait patiently for Thoma to talk to him about his problems. That was the best he could do for his best friend who had been there for him and his family through thick and thin, who was willing to sacrifice and run himself into the ground if it would help the Kamisato Clan, who's unwavering loyalty and ambitions for the clan had earned him a Pyro Vision from the heavens that had nearly beenstolenby the Raiden Shogun.

Thoma finished the current piece he was grilling, putting it on a place and serving it to Ayato, before proceeding to grill more toast.

"Mmmm. Delicious." Ayato commented to break the silence, as he chomped down on his toast, and saved a slice for Ayaka as Thoma proceeded to make even more Fisherman's Toast, and the Yashiro Commissioner decided to take the time to examine his surroundings. Most of the other Vision Holders were fast asleep, and they mostly kept to their usual groups, like Gorou being with Kazuha and Amber being with Eula, but most notable was the trio of Tartaglia, Zhongli, and Qiqi snoozing on the couch.

The Geo user was leaning against the back of the couch, looking as refined as usual, his head tilted forwards with his arms crossed as he slept, while the Harbinger was draped over his lap, an arm hooked over the armrest. Tartaglia's other arm was wrapped tightly around Qiqi, who was clinging to the Harbinger's shirt.

It wasn't long before Zhongli woke up with some confused blinking, shaking his head as he woke up, before seeming to realize the weight on his legs. Letting out a small smile, the older man gently patted Tartaglia's head, resulting from a small content purr from the sleeping Harbinger.

Zhongli let out a little snort, and Ayato greeted, "Good morning, Zhongli-shinshi."

"Ah, no need for formalities, Commissioner Kamisato." Zhongli bowed, which was actually more of a nod, with how his lower body was currently trapped under the weight of one whole Harbinger. Thoma tried to give him some toast, but Zhongli politely declined, not wanting to eat while Tartaglia was still using his legs as a pillow.

"Then the same goes for you." Ayato nodded back, "I must admit, I am rather... well... for the lack of a better word... surprise to see an esteemed Liyuen citizen so fond of a member of the Fatui, especially considering thecirc*mstances, as wel as how the other Liyuens reacted..."

"That is understandable." Zhongli mused, "Ever since Childe's deployment to Liyue, I have been teaching him many things about Liyue's culture and history. I have probably occupied most of his time outside of his work, and thus, I'd like to think that I know Childe the best out of everyone here. However, that does not directly translate into me saying that I know Childe well, though, as you can see from what we're being shown... however, Childe is entitled to his own secrets."

"I see..." Ayato hummed to himself.

"As for thesecirc*mstances... well, I am confident that there were other players involved. Best not to jump to conclusions before the truth of the situation is clear." Zhongli finished.

"That I must agree with." Ayato nodded. Jumping to conclusions and using people's emotions and poor judgement to manipulate people were one of the worst forms of manipulation that Ayato's had to deal with.

Their conversation was cut short when Beidou staggered up, rubbing her eyes and yawning as she stumbled towards the stove.

"Mmm! Smells good, Thoma! I didn't know you could cook Fisherman's Toast!"

"Ah, thank you, Captain Beidou! If there's anything else you want, I'll be happy to whip it up!" Thoma laughed, serving her a plate, before going back to his cooking. Beidou grinned, before she turned back to Ayato with a sly look in her eyes, having seemingly sobered up.

"He's a rare one, got a nice head on his shoulders, Sir Kamisato." Beidou snickered to herself, like she was in on some kind of inside joke, "You better take good care of him, or I'll snag him for the Crux!"

Ayato narrowed his eyes, "I'm sure that while Thoma can handle being on a boat, he'd much rather be on land. And you know that Thoma is one of the most important members of the Kamisato Clan. As the head of the clan, I should know best."

"My lord!" Thoma squeaked, turning red once again.

Catching the growing grin on Beidou's face, Ayato continued, "In myhumbleopinion, I bet I could fire like... eighty percent of the staff, and he'd still find some way to keep things running smoothly."

Thoma spluttered, "I'm not that good!"

Beidou burst into laughter, and Ayato cheekily turned towards Thoma, "Hmm... I'm sure we can work something out! If we fire most of the staff, the remaining staff can get a raise..."

The housekeeper visibly paled, "My Lord... please don't..."

"Alright. Just because you asked so nicely." Ayato smiled back, and Thoma groaned, and covered his face with his hands. It was an adorable sight, and Ayato couldn't help but relax as the housekeeper tried his best to keep his cool.

No tricks, no schemes, just some playful teasing between friends. Ayato wished he could have this forever.

"Go get 'em!"Beidou whispered, and shot him a thumbs-up while Thoma was distracted, but Ayato blinked in confusion. Go get... what? The food on the stove that was probably going to burn while Thoma was embarrassed?

That did seem like a good idea...

Ayato reached over, grabbing the pan that Thoma was using, but the housekeeper instantly snapped out of it and grabbed the pan from Ayato, "My Lord!"

"I just wanted to prevent it from burning. I wasn't going to add anything suspicious to it." Ayato reasoned, and Thoma huffed, puffing out his cheeks cutely.

Beidou just glanced at them, before looking back, watching as Zhongli continued to calmly sit on the couch, gently running his fingers through Tartaglia's ginger hair, before she groaned internally, "I'm not drunk enough for this..."

Chapter 30: The misery eats you alive

Chapter Text

Breakfast was rather chaotic, with Hutao and Xingqiu attempting to use some Wolfhook's to make purple hair dye and prank Diluc, but had gotten it all over Keqing instead. The Yuheng of the Liyue Qixing was yelling at the duo as Ganyu held her back, attempting to get the dye out of her hair and dress with a wet towel.

Meanwhile, Qiqi sipping some coconut milk as Tartaglia softly braided her hair, having eaten a delicious breakfast cooked by Thoma.

"What do I have to do today..." Qiqi murmured, slowly putting down her coconut milk and started rummaging through her bag for her notebook.

"Ah, Qiqi..." Tartaglia gently stopped her, "Did you forget that we're kind of trapped in a weird place?"

"Oh..." The zombie looked around, as the Harbinger continued, "So you don't need to check what to do today, alright?"

"Okay." Qiqi nodded, picking up her coconut milk, and Tartaglia let out a small smile as he tenderly placed her hat back on her head and adjusting it. Zhongli settled down beside the Harbinger, a cup of freshly brewed tea in hand, as the Snezhnayan yawned.

"Had a good sleep?" Zhongli murmured, handing Tartaglia the tea, and the Harbinger grinned tiredly, "Yep. Really good sleep."

"You still seem tired though..."

"Well... yeah..." Tartaglia admitted, "Anyone would be, in my situation..."

"I see... that does make sense..." Zhongli nodded to himself, as Qiqi settled down next to Tartaglia, leaning against his side. The Snezhnayan took another sip of tea, sighing contently to himself as he leaned against the ex-Archon, watching the chaos of Kaeya and Yae harassing Diluc over not drinking alcohol, with Noelle, Kokomi and Barbara helping Ganyu and Keqing clean up the mess made by Hutao and Xingqiu as Ningguang scolded them.

Eventually, everyone else settled down, and resigning himself to his fate, Tartaglia quietly stood up, activating the crystal, before sitting back down.

It didn't take long for the Fatui to arrive to assess the situation. Ajax was still staring at his brother, stunned, as still as an ice statue, as the Fatui moved in, treating the injured and generally trying to figure out this clusterf*ck of a situation.

Luckily, his brother had snapped out of it way faster than Ajax, and had told everything to the Fatui. Somehow, they had decided that even though the boy had inflicted some pretty severe injuries, he had merely been defending himself and his brother from other people who had weapons, and merely over-compensated in a dangerous situation for being unarmed.

The Fatui were even nice enough to help them carry their packages and escort them to their destination, and Ajax just trailed behind quietly, staring into nothing as he followed them blindly.

The following conversation that his brother had with the Fatui as he finished the delivery felt like static to his ears, buzzing incessantly inside his head and blocking out everything else.

He knew he had done what was right; his brother would not have been able to protect himself, so Ajax had to do the protecting for him. He also hadn't gotten into a fight; he had only gotten involved because some idiots decided to drag them into this mess.

But the shock on his brother's face would forever be seared into his mind, the terror and fear easily seen in his eyes as the older boy gaped at the violence demonstrated by the younger boy.

Jean lowered her head, and pulled Barbara in closer, before she glanced at Kaeya and Diluc. She knew that Kaeya and Diluc had their own information networks, and were involved in their fair share of... shady business, but everything they did was to protect Mondstadt.

Even if she didn't entirely approve of their methods (Diluc being the Darknight Hero and doing the Knights' jobs for them, then complaining about how useless the Knights were, not to mention Kaeya's weird schemes that often than not included Ruin Guards and putting everyone on danger), she knew that they had Mondstadt's best interests at heart.

And maybe, justmaybe, a small, selfish part of her was glad that they had taken up the burden of doing all the dirty work behind the schemes, just so that she could keep her own hands clean. So she could meet up with Barbara, the only thing being on her mind being the ridiculous requests the citizens often had for her and the overwhelming amount of paperwork she had to finish.

Even now, as most of the Fatui bid them farewell, leaving only the Fatui Agent supervisor to escort them back home to avoid any more scuffles, Ajax could see his older brother occasionally peeking over his shoulder to keep an eye on him.

Ajax lowered his head even further, following along blankly. He didn't even realize that they had gotten back home until he had quite literally smacked into his brother's back as he fiddled with the door handle.

"We're back!" His brother announced, and Ajax peeked past his brother's form and into the house, just in time to see his parents and older sister perking up.

"You two are finally back! We were so worried!" Their mother cooed, and their older sister rushed to get more cups to pour tea for her two siblings, but while their father did originally relax upon seeing them safe and sound, the mere glance of the Fatui Agent, shifting from foot to foot awkwardly, his face immediately fell and he cursed under his breath, "Пиздец. Not again..."

"Uh oh..." Amber gulped, and Sara sighed, crossing her arms, "Here we go again..."

Ajax could hear his heart pounding in his ears, as his father turned to his older brother, "Was it another fight?"

"Well, yeah..." Upon seeing the change in their father's expression, his older brother immediately put his hands up in a placating gesture, "I can explain, it wasn't Ajax's fault,папа. I shouldn't have brought him along-"

"At least your older brother recognizes it wasn't your fault and he's defending you." Gorou grunted, "Not sure how it would help though..."

"Silence."

His brother immediately clammed up, as their father glanced at him,before at Ajax, then at the Fatui agent who was just standing there awkwardly.

Sighing, their father turned to Ajax, narrowing his eyes, "Room, now."

Ajax dejectedly trudged towards him room, as his father turned towards his mother, "Take Tonia and Anthon out."

"папа, he already said it wasn't Ajax's fault, aren't you being too harsh on him?" He heard his older sister questioning, as his mother urged the younger children to wear their winter coats and ushered them out of the house.

The boy entered his empty room, closing the door behind him, looking around at the lingering remains of the presences of his younger siblings. Some drawings on the floor with thecrayons still spilling out of its container with the scraps of paper their older brother could grab from his job, old, patched up toys and pillows strewn all over; Anthon must have fallen asleep while watching Tonia attempt to draw something.

Sighing, Ajax immediately set about tidying the toys and putting everything back in their proper places, setting the mattresses back in their proper places so no one tripped over them. Then, he grabbed his stuffed narwhale, burying his face into its back. Toys were rare for them, since they didn't have much money to splurge on non-necessities, but they did get random gifts here and there from their older siblings' co-workers, whose kids had long grown out of needing toys.

But Ajax could never forget the day his father had personally gotten him the stuffed narwhale for his birthday. Not donations from other people who didn't need them, nor random gifts and knickknacks from strangers he barely knew.

No, this was special; a stuffed toy just for him. A toy that Ajax would always cherish, and usually, he knew that even well-meaning gifts had to be practical, because otherwise they would be rather useless, and a huge waste of Mora.

A reminder of the past, where everything had been so,sosimple; ice fishing with his father, cooking food with his mother, playing with his younger siblings, listening to his older siblings complain about random people from work without really understanding what was going on...

Kaeya and Diluc shared a look, before the redhead sighed and leaned back against the back of the couch.

Venti turned towards them, grinning and shooting them a thumbs up. He knew that the two were close after Kaeya had practically been adopted by Crepus, and everything had fallen apart when Kaeya had told Diluc the truth, guilty that a Khaenri'an spy had lived while the man who did nothing but shower him in kindness had died in the arms of his equally kind, innocent son.

Diluc hadn't been ready for a bombshell like that, adding to his turmoil of agony, anger, sadness, guilt, and other emotions tumbling around within his soul like a hurricane, and the sworn brothers had been torn apart.

But at least things between them were getting better, and Venti was happy for them. Kaeya only had Mondstadt's best interests at heart, and beneath his angry demeanor, Diluc really was just a child who took on too many emotional burdens and had no idea how to truly deal with them.

Not this lingering emptiness that he felt inside, like something fundamentally important had been ripped away from him, leaving him broken, shattered, unable to function properly. He could hardly understand why he didn't like weapons too much, why he was so easily startled just by a weirdly casted shadow, and now, he seemed to feel too much, and yet, feel too little.

"... and I canunderstand that he was just..."

Ajax raised his head upon hearing his father speak. He had nearly forgotten that his father and older siblings were with that Fatui agent that had escorted them back.

He knew that he shouldn't do it, that he had been given strict instructions to stay in his room, precisely because his father didn't want him to listen in on their conversation... but he just couldn't help it.

Eula winced; she had to admit, there were many times when she was younger when she had done just that, sneaking down the hallways quietly with her finely honed skills, lingering behind corners as she overheard her family discussing their latest plot.

It was one of the few reasons she discovered the atrocities behind her family name, and had managed to disconnect herself from her family, allowing her to discard them at the first possible opportunity to join the Knights of Favonius.

Ajax wanted to know what was going on, he wanted to know what was wrong.

Because if he knew what was wrong with him, Ajax could try to fix himself. His father clearly didn't understand, and he didn't expect the rest of his family to understand, and he was perfectly okay with that. Ajax would take on the burden of fixing himself, because really, everything was his fault.

Tartaglia grumbled internally that all his insecurities were being spilled out, but Zhongli just patted him on the shoulder and smiled at him kindly.

It had been so long since someone ever cared about Ajax, allowing him to be himself instead of something else entirely, and the Harbinger couldn't help but just melt into Zhongli's hold. Qiqi also reached up, grabbing his arm firmly.

Scooting closer to the door, clutching his narwhale tightly to his chest in an attempt to smother the rapid beating of his heart, Ajax pressed his ear against the crack between the wall and the door.

"... and he just saw that I was going to get hurt! The guy had an axe! It's not going overboard when we were literally defenseless!" His older brother argued.

"I know he's changed ever since he went missing, but he's only fourteen! He's still figuring himself out,папа! Give him more time!"His sister added,"You should talk to him, he'll tell you what's wrong-"

" I've talked to him already, and I was hoping that giving him space would let him figure things out on his own, but clearly he's just getting worse and worse! No fourteen year old should be able to clear out Hilichurl camps without any weapons." His father hissed, "Let alone taking on adults who've clearly been in their fair share of fights, and especially not one who could barely handle attacking a training dummy."

"Well... in his defense, Childe did try to tell you?" Xingqiu questioned uncertainly, "I mean, I'm not surprised his father doesn't understand... but still..."

"Are we really going to be arguing about this in front of a stranger?"

"Yeah... did they just forget the Fatui guy is just... there?" Chongyun asked, dumbfounded.

"You two were the ones that brought it up." His father groaned in exasperation, "You two should try talking to him. Maybe it would be easier for him to talk to someone who's closer to him in age. Maybe I'm just too old to understand this something about a hole in the ground."

"A hole in the ground?" He could hear his brother asking, unimpressed, the scratching of ceramic against wood indicating that he had grabbed his teacup, "That's what he told you?"

"Yes. He just kept talking about being in some hole in the ground for three months and a weird lady that taught him how to use weapons? I just can't-"

"Ah, if I may..." The Fatui agent spoke up for the first time, or at least, it was the first time Ajax heard him spoke,putting his teacup down with a tell-tale clunk, "I'm not sure if you have heard of this... but every year, the Fatui Military program will conscript young men into our ranks."

Ningguang and Jean frowned, sharing a look. They knew that it shouldn't be too unexpected, given just how many Fatui agents were milling around just in Monstadt and Liyue alone. But forcing civilians to send their children to the Fatui just so the Cryo Archon could use them for her own goals... they were lucky that Rex Lapis and Barbatos would do no such thing.

Ever since the beginning, Barbatos pretty much let Monstadt govern itself, letting them learn and grow from their own mistakes, only appearing to help sort things out when things were really dire.

As for Morax, the god pretty much overworked himself for Liyue, spilling his own blood to mint Teyvat's currency, doing business predications, and even shoring up their defenses and personally leading the Adepti army in the older times.

Both gods had vastly different styles of raising their nations, with Rex Lapis hand-holding his nation and needing to learn to let go while Barbatos let the people of his nation chose their own fates, but neither god was exploiting the people of their nations just for their own personal goals.

They turned towards Ei, who was lost in her own thoughts. Even Ei had started the Sakoku Decree and the Vision Hunt Decree while trying to help her nation, believing that stasis would protect her people without understanding the implications behind that protection.

She may have harmed her own nation, but it was out of ignorance and her own grief. Granted, it wasn't any better, but at least she wasn't ripping children away from their families to be stationed in other countries without knowing whether they'd ever get the chance to go home.

"No, absolutely not."His sister seethed,"He's only-"

"Don't be rude. He's still a guest."Ajax could hear his brother pulling his sister away,"We can talk about this later."

"Please, continue."His father stated.

"Ah... They are given training that would ingrain the sense of discipline and comradery into any young man, no matter how unruly they start out. The Fatui Military program aims to instill honor in defending our motherland, and the Fatui as a whole are diplomats who aim to contributeto peace all over Teyvat."

"Bullsh*t. Peace, my ass." Keqing swore, "Your "diplomats" literally assaulted two archons and release a sealed ancient sea monster!"

Ganyu and Ayaka nearly choked at Keqing's crude language, but Yae just chuckled to herself. She certainly liked the feisty Yuheng of the Liyue Qixing.

"However, a strong nation needs disciplined individuals who are willing to work together for the benefit of the nation, and having so much infighting amongst our comrades is detriment todevelopment of our homeland ."

"This just sounds like some pre-rehearsed propaganda, you don't seriously believe-"

"The Fatui are still a military detachment led by our Cryo Archon."His brother warned his sister,"Be nice."

"Ahem... I'm sure you have your doubts. Also... your son is quite a few years younger than the usual recruits. "The agent coughed, before continuing,"But w e tend to not conduct these enlistments in more peaceful villages, and while normally I wouldn't inform you of this path, given what I have seen and heard... perhaps this could be an option for you to take."

All of a sudden, like the Tsaritsa herself had appeared to seal everyone inside an icy prison, everyone's blood ran cold. They knew that Tartaglia was a Harbinger, and had to have joined the Fatui at a rather young age, given that he had to have climbed his way up the ranks and it would have taken him several years to do so...

But they never would have imagined that Tartaglia, or rather, Ajax, might not have joined the Fatui willingly.

The young boy, heavily traumatized by the Abyss and unable to let go of what he had experienced, yet unable to properly convey what had truly happened, was already lost and confused, trying his best to navigate this new dynamic with his family without understanding what was going on with himself.

His own mind and body working against him, finely honed instincts meant to help him survive in the devouring depths now backfiring on him as too many things happened around, yet nothing violent or dangerous like what he had experienced down in the pit of darkness.

If his family had truly given up on trying to help him figure out what was wrong, and tossed him to the Fatui to "fix" him...

"We aren't-"

"That's enough."His father lightly scolded, and his sister immediately quietened down,"Thank you for your time, and for your suggestion. It is getting late now, so I shouldn't hold you up for too long."

"No worries. I'm just doing my job."

Ajax could hear the sound of wood scratching against wood as several chairs scraped against the wooden floorboards as the two men stood up, footsteps getting gradually softer as his father led the agent towards the door.

"We are NOT sending Ajax to your stupid Fatui training camp..." He could heard his sister grumbling under her breath,"What's his problem? Ajax's still a kid!"

"I'm not trying to agree with him or anything... but I don't think we had any violent tendencies while growing up... did we...?" His brother asked.

"Well, we didn't go missing for three whole days in a forest full of wild animals ready to eat us, did we?" She snapped back, crossing her arms as her foot tapped against the floorboards.

"Good point." His brother admitted, "But... I must say... I am worried about him... have you seen him fight?"

"No... last time I was busy trying to not get my throat slit. But seeing how scared the muggers were... Ajax must be damn good." His sister huffed,"And they deserved it."

"Well, at leastsomeoneappreciates what he's done!" Paimon huffed, crossing her arms angrily, "Childe literally saved their lives!"

"You're right. Ajax is good. Too good."

"What do you mean?"

"You know..." His older brother gestured vaguely,"Before he disappeared, he could barely hold a weapon, let alone fight with one... and yet... three days later... he's wielding weapons like he's been using one his whole life..."

"Not getting eaten by wild animals is a good motivator."His sister argued, "But... yeah... I can see how that is concerning..."

Ajax heard the hinges squeaking as the door closed, and footsteps thundering in tandem with the creaking of old floorboards.

"You sure took some time talking to that Fatui guy."His sister grumbled, and his father let out a sigh,"I was asking about the... details behind his proposal."

"No way..." Kokomi gasped, "He can't possibly be thinking..."

"He did." Beidou growled firmly.

"What... You can't do this to him!"His brother shot to his feet, the floorboards groaning as his brother took a step forwards," папа, you know all the rumors about the Fatui; about how some families never see their children again, how some of them come back different..."

"He's only fourteen!"His sister added,"He's still a kid! You can't..."

" I'm willing to believe that maybe Ajax laughing while fighting all those hilichurls may just be a product of me being stressed over an attack... but I just can't make sense of anything."His father stumbled towards a chair, slumping down tiredly," Maybe this is all some childish hero fever dream he's concocted from all the stories I told him..."

His father coughed, and sighed,"Maybe... maybe Ajax just needs to grow up."

"Grow up? Grow up!?" Zhongli growled, a draconic undertone to his voice that was laced with the promise of a painful death.

Even while he knew that Tartaglia's father couldn't really comprehend the severity of the situation, he couldn't help but feel upset on the Harbinger's behalf. The boy had grown up far too fast, had witnessed horrors that even the strongest of illuminated beasts couldn't even handle, and still manage to survive with his sanity intact.

And yet, this man just assumed his son was making things up. The boy was already confused, questioning himself and everything around him, his self-esteem and confidence already crushed beyond belief as the Abyss ripped everything away from him, and here this man was, making things worse.

Ajax missed whatever else was being said, as he bit his lip and clutched his narwhale tightly, standing up and stumbling towards his bed. But still, his tears refused to fall. Crying was a sign of weakness, and Ajax couldn't show weakness, because showing any weaknesses just meant more ways for him to die a painful death.

Maybe his father was right. Maybe he did need to grow up.

"No." Albedo stated resolutely, surprising everyone andespeciallyhimself. Albedo was a creation, an artificial being, and yet, evenhehad been left alone at one point, his master having left him a task far beyond the limit of his abilities, with the threat of never seeing her again.

Even after Alice and Klee took him in, and he was accepted into the Knights... he still wanted to see his master again. The master who raised him ever since he could remember, bringing him along for her expeditions and experiments, ordering him around the lab and with expectations that Albedo had always done his best to meet.

The master that had disappeared without leaving anything more than a note and a recommendation letter, all but abandoning Albedo to face a brand new reality that had he had no idea how to face.

Even an artificial being, Albedo supposed, had room to grow up.

He looked the Harbinger straight in the eye, and the both of them immediately came to the mutual understanding of what it felt like to have been forced to grow up too fast.

ButthatAjax, the young, stupid, foolish boy who had run away, who thought that he could be an adventurer without killing anything... that boy, thatchild, was dead, long gone, swallowed by the darkness that lurked beneath the surface.

There wasn't anything left, except the emptiness that permeated his entire being, the choking miasma that flooded his lungs, making it hard to breathe. The corruption that sloshed through his veins, the voices that screamed in his head, the absolutedarkness that ate away at his being.

He really did destroy everything he touched.

Ajax was as good as dead, but he had to grow up. He needed to grow up, because maybe that could fix whatever was wrong with him, and his father would accept him again. But the dead can't grow, can't move on, can't mature, can't feel. So how could he fix himself, when he couldn't even figure out what to fix?

He buried his face in his narwhale, pulling his legs in as he curled up into a ball, just trying his best to process everything, and failing miserably. Emotions were bubbling up in his chest, and it was just too much for him to handle, and Ajax let out a choked sob as he collapsed onto the bed.

He put his hands over his ears, but it did nothing to block out the cacophony of voices ringing about inside his head. He could barely breathe at all, an d suddenly, as everything went black, he felt nothing at all.

Chapter 31: Never saw nothing

Chapter Text

The darkness was suffocating.

Ajax had realized that when he was forced to sleep on the couch, instead of in his room with his younger siblings. Left to his own thoughts without any distractions, without any peace, with all the voices in his head-

The boy whimpered silently, and curled in on himself. He couldn't make a sound, or the monsters will find him. If they found him, he was dead, so very dead, Ajax didn't want to die, Ajax wanted to go home, he wanted to see his family again-

Ajax clenched his hand, so out of it that he was completely unaware that he was gripping his own arm, and he nearly shrieked when he felt something constricting his arm. Tumbling off the couch in his panic, tangling himself in his suffocating blankets as he crashed into the ground, the teen tried his best to control his breathing as he snapped to attention.

The floor was cold,so cold, and youngSnezhnayan pushed himself up, massaging his bruised elbow from his unfortunate tumble, and crawled back onto the couch. Pulling the blankets around his small, shaking form, Ajax tried his best to lull himself to sleep.

Keqing didn't know what to think. She knew that she should hate the Harbinger; heck, he had nearly drowned her home. But knowing that Tartaglia was so young, heck, he was probably younger than all the scholars in the Sumeru Akademia, and that he had most likely been tossed into the Fatui before he was barely a teenager...

Somehow, it put a bad taste in her mouth; she wanted to shove her lightning stiletto into every single high ranking Fatui officer whowasn'tcalled Tartaglia, Childe or Ajax.

Days passed, and the boy went about his days, helping his mother around the house. but not being able to fight, to kill things, was harder than he had thought. His body twitched from the excess energy, every small noise setting him off. Darkness seemed to cling to him like a phantom, following him around, tainting everything he touched.

It was almost like his family could sense the corruption festering in his heart, as his older siblings frowned and looked at him with concern as they tried to talk to him, and his father actively tried to keep Anthon and Tonia from interacting with him, though that did nothing to stop the younger children from wanting to play with Ajax.

All the while, the Abyss ate away at his soul, greedily consuming the negativity within him like a delicacy.

Ajax tried, really tried to control himself, to push down and contain his manic energy. If he could just grab those miasmic whisps that wafted off him and throttle them, he'd very much love to learn how to do so.

Despite the seriousness of the situation, Xiao let out an audible snort.

The idea that this tiny mortal wanted to choke the Abyssal taint out of himself was very amusing indeed, and if he did learn how to do so, the Adeptus would like to see it. He wasn't fond of Tartaglia, by any means, but if he was going to be so clingy with his lord, the less Abyssal taint on him, the better.

But how could he fight something so... intangible? It was like fighting with his own emotions, with himself; ultimately, it did nothing but give him pain and suffering. Ajax would rather punch his way out of his problems, since he clearly didn't know anything else.

Then one day, out of the blue, as Ajax swept under the couch to clean up any dust, a knock on the door rang out.

"Ah, coming!" His mother called out, untying her apron and opening the door, revealing a Fatui soldier. Ajax couldn't hear what the soldier asked, but his mother just shook her head, "I'm sorry, he's currently out, would you like to come in for some tea?"

Sneaking closer, Ajax heard the soldier reply, "No, thank you. I'm merely here to deliver a letter. All the details should be in here."

He handed his mother an envelope, and his mother accepted it, still clearly stumped, "I see... thank you for your time..."

"Just doing our duty for Her Majesty. Have a nice day." The soldier bowed, and his mother closed the door. Flipping the envelope around suspiciously, his mother inspected every inch of the letter, before staring at the seal.

"It's official." His mother grunted, scratching the back of her neck in confusion, "What is going on? What isмужthinking, having dealings with the Fatui?"

Luckily for her, it didn't take his father long to come back, having not been able to catch too many fish, and subsequently, didn't have too much to sell. The second he walked through the front door, his mother slapped the envelope against his chest, "What is this?"

"Ah..." His father sighed, dejectedly taking the envelope from her, "I will... tell you all over dinner."

He stared at Ajax forlornly, and Ajax felt his heart pound.

"Ajax, my dear boy..."

His blood squired beneath his skin, like an insect had laid its eggs in his flesh and they were hatching, wanting to break free of their incubating host. His muscles tensed, his fingers twitched, and a voice purred in his ear.

"They don't understand. Come back, Ajax. You're one of us, so full of ambition, the darkness of human mortality."They whispered,"Come back, let us claim what is rightfully ours... and you can have whatever you desire."

"Shut up."

He couldn't take it anymore. He raced out of the house, not even bothered to take his coat, and plunged into the forest. He couldn't hear his mother yelling at his father to stop him, his father reaching out to grab his arm.

All Ajax cared about was getting as far away from home as possible before he killed anyone by accident.

Barbara looked at Tartaglia sadly. She had never had any bad dealings with the Fatui before (besides that situation with the bard and traveler outside the cathedral and the bard was actually Lord Barbatos holy sh*t and he was the one that returned the broken lyre and she had screeched in his face and scolded him, holy crap she actually scolded Lord Barbatos himself, may he have mercy on her soul-), but the Harbinger had never struck her as... evil.

At least, not as evil as Diluc and Rosaria made them out to be. Heck, she would go so far as to admit that she hated Albert and all his stalking and his weird obsession with her far more than she hated the Fatui. At least the Fatui didn't stalk her every move every single day.

Tartaglia reminded her of Bennett; a hard working person who just happened to caught in some unlucky circ*mstances. It wasn't his fault he had fallen into the Abyss, and now he was paying the price for just trying to survive.

He remembered his brother mentioning once about a hoard of hilichurls near the coast that his friends complained about. He had purposely tried to talk about it out of Ajax's earshot, but hadn't realized that Ajax had been right by the door when he mentioned it.

A goal in mind to work off all his manic energy, Ajax headed out.

He came home before dinner, covered in the blood of the monsters he had mercilessly slaughtered. His older siblings stared at him before sharing a knowing look, as his mother hurried him to the bathroom to clean himself up.

Dinner that day was nothing special; just some fish soup, along with some bread.

"So...папа, you said you had something to tell us..." His older brother twirled his spoon idly, having already finished his dinner, as his sister munched on some bread.

"Yes..." His father sighed, "Tonia, take Anthon to your room."

"Oh... ok." The younger girl nodded, helping her younger brother off his chair. The both of them disappeared from the dining table, and with the slam of a closed door, his father looked up, "I have decided that... we will be sending Ajax to the Fatui's Military program."

Ajax felt his heart stop, but before anyone could protest, his father explained, "I'm not happy about this decision either. But perhaps the strict military training can straighten him out, fix whatever seems to be wrong with him."

He spoke so casually, like Ajax wasn't even there, and the smaller boy hunched down, making himself smaller, as his sister shot to her feet, "папа, you can't be serious! He's only fourteen, they'll kill him!"

His older brother grumbled to himself, "But you know how teenagers are,папа..."

"I've already made up my mind." His father pushed himself up to his feet, "Do you have any better ideas?"

Everyone looked at each other. They hated this, hated that a young child who was just doing his best to survive was going to be thrown into the Fatui to fend for himself.

Even for those that hated Tartaglia and the Fatui as a whole (Diluc would never admit it, but he couldn't find anything about the Harbinger to hate, besides from the fact that he was associated with the Fatui)... this was wrong. Plain wrong.

But what other choice did they have? Therapy was disgustingly expensive, and was most likely only affordable to the richest of the rich in Snezhnaya, which Tartaglia's family probably wasn't. They weren't even directly involved with this situation, and eventheyhad no idea what other courses of action could be taken.

They glanced at Tartaglia and the former Geo Archon, and kept their thoughts to themselves. The poor kid had it rough enough already, no point rubbing more salt in the wound.

Ajax had never seen his father like this. Snezhnaya was a cold, unforgiving nation, where only the strongest, the best of the best, survive. Showing weakness was akin to admitting that one didn't have what it took to survive the harsh winters.

And for the first time in his entire life, Ajax saw weakness in his father. The way he lowered his head, and his shoulders slumped, completely devoid of energy. His greying hair from aging and stress, the way his body shook, desperation permeating his entire form.

Ajax might not be hurting anyone, but the stress and strain from trying to contain his son's violent tendencies was killing him.

And with the way his older siblings and his mother looked at each other, they had come to the same conclusion as well.

"But..." His mother was at a loss for words, "We can't... he isn't... you don't..."

"He has to pull himself together. I can't have him being a bad influence for Tonia and Anthon. Ajax, you'll be going in one week.жена, please help him pack." His father looked at his son, like he was mourning the loss of a loved one, "It's... it's for the best."

Ajax was in a complete daze as his older siblings packed his bags. His mother just clung to him, tears threatening to fall from her eyes, but she refused to cry.

"Where isбратgoing?" Tonia asked, tugging at Ajax's arm, while Anthon sat on the floor, clinging to his legs.

Pull yourself together, he hissed internally, and forced a smile onto his face, but before he could reply, his father took his younger siblings by the hand and led them away, "It's nothing. Ajax is just sick, and he's going away for treatment. He'll be back before you know it."

A sickness, that's what it was, the darkness that was eating away at him, consuming his mind and body. Something was wrong with him, something that had to be cured, to be fixed.

"братis sick?" Anthon squeaked, reaching out for Ajax.

"Yeah." Ajax choked out, "No need to worry. It's nothing serious, okay?"

Chapter 32: I hope we can all get along... NOT

Chapter Text

Ajax stared at the ground blankly as his mother and sister fussed over him. His younger siblings were currently with his brother and father, leaving the women of the family to help him pack.

"You must take care of yourself, Ajax." His sister gripped onto his shoulder tightly, looking into his empty, broken eyes, "Who knows what kind of crap the Fatui do to new recruits..."

"What is your father thinking... even by normal standards, conscription into the Fatui are for those at least eighteen years old..." His mother shook her head sadly. She looked like she was going to cry, having to send one of her precious babies into an army camp that didn't exactly have the best reputation for keeping their soldiers alive... but her husband was the one who had done this... and they couldn't exactly turn back now.

That would just be a death sentence.

"Would the Tsaritsa really..." Xingqiu dragged his finger across his throat, miming getting his head sliced off, "... simply because a mere fourteen year old didn't want to join some army camp?"

"Before the Cataclysm... she was a much kinder soul. And yet, now, her heart has turned to coal." Venti admitted, thinking deeply as he resting his chin against his hand. In his uncertainty, his finger fidgeted, as if he were strumming an invisible lyre.

"What he's trying to say is; it's likely." Diluc deadpanned, "Can you like... not talk in rhymes or ballads for once and please get to the point?"

"Fine." Venti huffed, "She used to be a kind god; a true embodiment of the Goddess of Love. But the Cataclysm hardened her heart, and she's pretty much unrecognizable. She might be softer on children and won't punish them now... but there is no doubt she'd keep a record of this and may hold if over Childe's head when he's older... if she really needed him."

Aether and Paimon shuddered; they really weren't looking forward to going to Snezhnaya...

"Urg." Diluc groaned in disgust; mainly aimed towards the Fatui. Ever since falling into the Abyss, he could tell that Tartaglia's fate was now completely out of his hands, having spiraled completely out of control; whatever happened shouldn't really be held against him.

His sister narrowed her eyes, deep in thought, as if she had a pretty good idea of what Ajax might go through. She pressed her forehead against Ajax's, ignoring the way he flinched backwards from the sudden contact.

She murmured, "You're going to be far younger and smaller than everyone... they're going bully you. Please... I know you're in so much trouble with папа because of your so-called violent tendencies... which is still utter bullsh*t, you've just been trying to protect us..."

Everyone immediately glowered. Sure, the fact that the child was so violent was disturbing... but he had only been trying to protect his family...

Was that so hard to understand?

She sniffled, and stood up straight, tears welling up in her bright, sea blue eyes, rolling down her face in fat globs,"You can't let anyone take advantage of you, okay? A lot of people that are conscripted... the only language they understand is violence... If anyone does anything to you, just hit them. No one is allowed to hurt you."

"Is it... really that bad?" Gorou tilted his head, his ears and tail flicking about uneasily. He's a general in the Watatsumi Army, and yet, his experiences hadn't been so...barbaric...

The only one with all the answers was Tartaglia... and yet, the Harbinger was remaining silent.

Ajax just stared up at his sister with his dead eyes, watching impassively as she cried. He hated that he had made her cry, she was sad because of him, it was his fault, all his fault-

"Come back, Ajax..."

The voices echoed within his head like pinballs, gradually getting louder and louder, and Ajax felt like he was suffocating as the darkness completely consumed his mind and-

He was snapped out of it when his sister gently smacked his cheeks, cupping his face gently. She had already wiped her tears, and she stared at him lovingly, "This is not your fault. This was never your fault. Do not ever blame yourself for this. This is an adult issue, okay? We'll get you back, somehow."

"I like your sister." Sara nodded approvingly, "Trying to stand up to her father and the Tsaritsa, even with the social hierarchy in Snezhnaya... she's a brave woman."

Tartaglia couldn't help but smile, happy that his sister was getting the recognition she deserved. She was constantly overlooked due to her gender back home... at least the others were appreciative of her.

Sara saw the small smile, and her heart melted ever so slightly for the Harbinger. She may have tolerated the Harbinger, simply because he had two legendary Adepti from Liyue on his side...

She's never liked the Fatui, ever since they barged into her home, corrupted the Tenryou Commission, tried to manipulate the Almighty Raiden Shogun... the Fatui that litered her homeland, smuggling Crystal Marrow, causing all sorts of havoc for the locals... but something about this one... he seemed different from them all.

Maybe, justmaybe, she could learn to accept Tartaglia... or rather... Ajax. Not the Harbinger, but the boy who just wanted to live.

No.Ajax decided.He wouldn't act up. If he didn't act up... his family wouldn't have to worry about him... he'll just go through this conscription peacefully, and go home...

It wasn't long before they were done packing. Ajax spent the night on the couch, unable to sleep, before his father brought him out before the sun even rose.

A duffle bag in hand, Ajax stared at the military camp that was going to be his home for the next year. His father was talking to a Fatui soldier, presumably finishing up the paperwork, as another Fatui soldier was sent in his direction.

Despite the mask covering the soldier's face, Ajax could tell the man took a double-take as he stared down the boy that barely reached up to his torso.

"Uh..." The man stuttered, "You sure you're in the right place, kid?"

"Even the Fatui of all people don't think he's in the right place!" Keqing huffed in displeasure. Everyone had the same opinions, but they just didn't voice them openly.

Tartaglia scowled internally. Nothing had even happened, and yet, everyone was getting so upset over it. Did they really think he as that weak?

Zhongli could sense his friend's agitation, and quickly grabbed his arm to calm him down.

Ajax just looked up at him blankly, his Vision tucked firmly in his coat pocket. He was pretty damn sure he wasn't in the right place, but who was he to say anything?

He watched as his father turned, taking one last glance at his wayward son... before leaving.

He didn't even say goodbye.

Ajax's eyes burned with unshed tears.

"How... horrible..." Ayaka nearly wanted to cry. She was probably being dramatic... but he was practically abandoning Tartaglia; left alone in the frozen land of a heartless god, with no one to rely on...

Thoma winced, and lowered his head. He knew what it was like to be all alone... but he knew that he hadn't been abandoned. He had made some decisions, had gotten stranded... and yet, even after all that, people still treated him with kindness.

He had a feeling that whatever was going on in the Fatui... it was the exact opposite of being kind.

"Yep. That's the kid." Another Fatui officer replied, "Call someone to bring him for health screening."

Ajax continued waiting around for a minute or two, until he sensed a familiar aura, and looked up.

"Someone familiar?" Chongyun looked a little hopeful, but Xingqiu calmed him down, "Don't get your hopes up. It's still the Fatui."

A Fatui soldier was led towards him, and from his posture, Ajax could tell that the soldier recognized him too.

"Oh! It's you! How's your sister doing?" He asked. Ajax didn't wanted to be rude... and this guy had helped him out before...

"She's... fine."

"That's good. As long as your family is safe and sound." The soldier muttered, thinking, and Ajax stared at the man's weapon. It was the same as last time - a Pyro-infused gun... but it looked like it had been upgraded? Or maybe that was just Ajax being delusional...

"Ah, you can tell?" The soldier brandished his gun proudly, "Our Technology sector made some upgrades. It's lighter now, and can pack a much larger punch."

"He's nice." Hutao grinned, "He reminds me of Nadia and Vlad. Which reminds me, those two should TOTALLY get together-"

"Oh, they totally got together." Tartaglia grinned, glad to talk about something happy for once, "During the Moonchase Festival, I saw them meeting up, outside of work! Vlad treated her to dinner! Though uh... I kind of lost track of them after that..."

"Oya?" Hutao's eyes glinted, rubbing her hands together mischievously, "I'm so going to hold that over their heads... Do you have any dirt on Andrei? Or Ekaterina? Ohhh... I can just imagine their expressions..."

"Please focus. Ei glared at the funeral parlor director, who just huffed, and rolled her eyes. Zhongli glared daggers at her, because god damn it, this was a topic that was taking Tartaglia's mind off this stupid memory looking bullsh*t, and now he was being reminded of it all over again.

Kazuha coughed, and tried to clear the air, "What she means is, that it is not safe for us to stay here longer than necessary, so we should get through this as soon as possible. Perhaps you can... uh...gossipabout the intimate affairs between Fatui members later?"

He handed the gun over to Ajax, but he was smacked in the back by another Agent.

"What are you doing, handing weapons to children?" The Agent berated.

"Oh, don't be such a stick in the mud." The Pyro-gunner snorted, "He's a fine kid. Plus... I'd say thathe'smore dangerous than the gun, anyways."

He offered the gun to Ajax again, "Go on, you can hold it, if you want."

Even while tainted by the Abyss and depressed that his father had practically abandoned him to his fate... Ajax was still apubescent teenaged boy.Of course,he was going to want to hold the glowy weapon.

With eyes wide in awe, Ajax gently took the weapon, admiring all the shiny parts of the gun, feeling the heat of Pyro burning within the gun's core...

Everyone rolled his eyes. After everything that had happened, of course this battle maniac acted the most like his age... when he was holding a god damned weapon.

It was kind of cute though...

They glanced at said man, who was currently answering Qiqi's questions of "what's a gun?" and "why is it red?".

It really was cute.

It was warm... so warm... like the fire that Skirk had lit that day, taking care of his injured body after he had blacked out, with no memory of what had occurred...

Ajax wanted to cry. At least Skirk had cared about him...

Maybe she was right. Maybe he should have just stayed in the Abyss. Being thought to be dead by his family was better than this; his family being forced to take sides, his sister crying over him, his older siblings trying to defend him against his father... his younger siblings, who just didn't understand...

"This is bad..." Zhongli muttered under his breath. Tartaglia turned to look at him, but Zhongli leaned over and whispered, "I'll explain to you later."

The ginger tilted his head in confusion, but he still nodded in agreement.

"Hey, you okay, kid?" The Pyro-gunner snapped him out of his thoughts, and Ajax nodded, handing the gun back to him.

"Alright." The soldier led him towards a tent, "They're just going to do a blood test, take your weight, height, all the usual stuff. Just to make sure it's safe for you to train."

He seemed a little worried, though, but he didn't voice his concerns, and Ajax didn't question him.

The health check-up was a smooth process... though Ajax felt like he had completely unnerved the lady clad in blue, watching intensely as she stuck the needle into his arm, drawing out his corrupted blood. Much to his surprise... it really did look like normal blood; Ajax had been half expecting himself to bleed black, his blood cells dying within him as the Abyss ate away at him...

Xiao and Ganyu shared a disgusted look. They've killed their fair share of monster that bled black... and it hadn't been a pretty sight... they were already pretty much vegetarians, Xiao with his Almond Tofu and Ganyu with her Qingxin...

The sight of all those dirty, rotten carcasses, black blood leaking everything, out of stabbed entrails and broken skulls, leeching into the ground and eliminating all the life around it... if they weren't already vegetarians, they were pretty sure it would have been more than enough to turn them vegetarian at least a million times over.

"Besides from being a little underweight... he seems healthy enough." The lady had announced to the Pyro-gunner, "As for the blood test... we'll know in a day or two. But he should be good to go."

"That's great!" The soldier smiled... or at least, Ajax thought he was smiling under the mask, "Come on, I'll lead you to your temporary barrack."

"Take care of him." The lady smiled, patting Ajax on the head gently, ignoring the way he flinched, "He's cute."

Zhongli knew that she just meant that he was cute in a kid way... but still... he couldn't help but feel his blood boil beneath the surface, his eye twitching. Tartaglia had to put in so much effort to hide his snickering.

Leading him away form the medical tent, the Pyro-gunner pointed out some of the important buildings, before explaining, "You're younger... and a special case... so you get a private introduction. Otherwise..."

He pointed to the other side of the barbed wire fence, where a Fatui Agent was barking out instructions to a group of roughly twelve guys, who were all way taller and bulkier than Ajax.

"We've uh... heard of some of the stuff you've done. I mean, I've personally seen you fight, I'm sure you'll get used to the training... It's just that..."

The Pyro-gunner looked around warily, before he leaned down and whispered in Ajax's ear, "Have you heard of the termдедовщина?"

Zhongli froze, his blood instantly cooling.There was that word again... whatever Tartaglia had been trying to explain, before they had been interrupted Amber and Eula...

He couldn't help but glare at them, and the Mondstadt duo shivered, while Noelle looked at them, completely confused.

"... Did anyone understand that?" Ayato asked dryly, crossing his arms. It clearly wasn't anything good...

"Dedovshchina. It literally translates to "reign of grandfathers"... but as for its meaning..." Venti, Ei and Yae shared a look (they had all agreed to never include Zhongli in their mental agreements; at least, those that pertained to the Harbinger he was protective over), before the bard continued, "No idea. I understand each individual word... just... not the phrase strung together..."

Ajax clearly had no idea what it meant either, and stared blankly at the soldier.

"Ah... how do I explain this in a kid friendly way..." ThePyro-gunner huffed, "There's... kind of like a hierarchy system, by rank. So uh, depending on your rank... you conscripts are the lowest rank, by the way... you'll kind of get bullied by those of a higher rank. And within your own individual rank, you'll also have your ownhierarchy. You're pretty young... and small... so they might try to target you first..."

Ajax nodded understandingly; that pretty much made sense. Everyone wanted to be the top of the top, and that meant stepping on everyone else under them.

Kokomi had to admit... she was rather concerned for Tartaglia's mental health. The Watatsumi Army wasn't even close to being that cut-throat, and there were already so many psychological problems (she blamed herself for that one), but to think that a fourteen year old was easily taking this in stride...

"Anyways-" ThePyro-gunner turned when he heard someone call him, "Hurry up, damn it. Don't waste your time on a kid."

Another Agent ran up to them, and thePyro-gunner cursed under his breath.

"I heard that." The Agent snarled, and the Pyro-gunner flinched."You're taking too long, the trainer is getting antsy. Go receive the next batch of recruits, I'll bring the kid."

ThePyro-gunner had no choice but to agree, "Take care, kid!"

"Shut up! This is the Fatui, not pre-school."

Ajax decided that he didn't like this Agent. And the Agent probably didn't like him either, for he shoved the younger boy forward and forced him to walk faster, "You're not going to survive like that. Hurry the f*ck up."

"Rude." Kaeya grumbled, "He just got there."

"I'm going to set them all on fire." Diluc growled in agreement.

"Count me in." Beidou snorted, "I'll take you on a voyage straight into their ports."

"Don't be stupid. Are you trying to get Snezhnaya to wage war on us!? Ningguang hissed.

Beidou just shot her a thumbs-up, "Don't worry! We'll just plot! And make plans! But we won't do anything."

"... Ningguang clearly has the braincells here." Xingqiu whispered to Hutao, who just snickered.

Luckily for Ajax, the trainer didn't really want them to do anything. He just... kind of yelled at them about the etiquette and respect bullsh*t that he expected from the recruits, before dismissing them into one of the barracks and telling them to sort it out on their own.

Ajax just followed along, despite all the mocking looks he got fromliterallyeveryone else in his group who towered over him like a forest.

Someone snickered, and tried to trip Ajax, but the smaller boy easily dodged the attempt and continued trudging along.

It wasn't long until they got to the barracks, and everyone flooded in, wanting to get out of the chilling, bitter cold as soon as possible. Ajax was swept into the crammed, but slightly warmer room, that was packed with multiple double decker beds, as well as a hefty amount of roughly forty recruits.

Everyone immediately started fighting over beds, not wanting to be too close to the toilets, yet not wanting to be close to the door, which Ajax found absolutely ridiculous; they should be happy that they had a proper place to sleep in the first place.

He quickly moved against the wall, not wanting to be crushed as the older, taller men all fought each other like a bunch of children at a playground, tossing their bags onto the beds to "claim" them.

At this point, Ajax would rather be in the Abyss. At least the monsters' actions were still logical.

Yae nearly choked from laughter. This kid thought the Abyss was better than the Fatui army barracks? Hilarious!

He clenched his fists. He couldn't lose control here...

All of a sudden, Ajax felt someone grab his arm, and yanked him forwards. Stumbling, Ajax fell face first into another person's chest, and he was immediately shoved away.

"Oh, I thought I was grabbing a broomstick. My bad." The person who initially grabbed him snickered wolfishly, like a predatory staring down his prey, and Ajax just looked away. He didn't want to get into a fight, he couldn't get into a fight.

"Hey, why is there a baby here?" Someone else laughed, "How old is he, ten?"

"What are you doing here, baby?" Another mocked, grabbing Ajax by the head and slamming him into one of the bedposts, "Oops, I'm sorry, but that's why babies shouldn't be here."

Jean gritted her teeth, and it seemed like everyone else had the same reaction. They had all immediately targeting Tartaglia because he was the smallest... how disgusting.

Ajax could barely feel the pain. It was nothing compared to what he'd endured in the Abyss... and the pain ripping his heart apart when he remembered the looks on his family's face.

"What's going on here?" Another voice rang out, and everyone turned towards the door, where another group of tall, strong recruits were standing, looking absolutelybloodthirsty.

"What's it to you?" Someone spat, and the supposed leader of the new group grinned predatorily, "We're yoursuperiors."

Everyone else immediately froze; it seemed like they had all gotten warnings about how the hierarchy system worked around here. Smiling, the leader strode into the room, "Has everyone picked a bed?"

No one dared to answer him, and the leader, still smiling, grabbed someone by the neck and smashed their face into the wall, "I'm expecting an answer."

"Some... have... sir..." The recruit who still had his face smushed against the wall tried to answer, blood leaking out from his broken nose. The leader just hmphed and dropped the injured teen to the ground, who clutched his nose in agony.

"Shut up."

The injured teen continued whimpered, and he earned a harsh kick to his stomach.

Ajax just stared at him impassively, as did everyone else.

Still smiling like some kind of maniac, the leader strode up to the best bed; isolated in a corner, a fair distance away from both the toilets and doors, and was relatively warm compared to the rest of the room. Seeing as there was already a bag on it, the leader immediately yanked it off and tossed it at another newbie recruits, who was smacked in the face and crumpled under the unexpected weight.

"Oh my, you should have caught it." The leader smirked haughtily, "You juniors... you aren't very good at listening to instructions."

"What bloody instructions!?" Another recruit, presumably the one who owned the bag, stomped up to the leader, but he immediately found himself on the floor, the leader's foot stepping harshly on his back.

"Of course, the unspoken ones. We are in the army, after all. Who has time to chit chat?" The leader grinned, "We're your seniors. Naturally, that means whatever we say, goes. And everything that goes unsaid.. well, it should be obvious. You should all know your place."

Ajax felt like he was on some sort of weird power trip. While he definitely had the physical strength to back himself up... at this point, he was just abusing his authority.

Eyes glinting malicious, the leader scanned through all the newbie recruits, as the other seniors gathered around their leader.

"I hope we can all get along."

The "not" was unspoken.

Some looked completely willing to join their leader in their abuse of authority, and from the expressions on their faces, Ajax had a feeling that they've had so much frustration bubbling up within them, and they were happy that they could finally use their juniors as punching bags...

Some were join going along with it, so as to notincur the wraths of the others... but they probably also had so much pentfrustration up within them... and if a situation suddenly triggered them...

Well, it was no doubt that they'd all be the aggressors, ready to take out all their anger on their juniors...just like they had been abused prior by the previous generation.

"I'm sorry... but what the f*ck?!"

Unexpected, it was Gorou who had cursed, and everyone turned to stare at the pure-hearted puppy dog commander... who had just dropped an f-bomb.

"What!?" Gorou flinched away from all the looks, "I'm an army general! I know how to swear!"

"I'm sorry..." Even Albedo was surprised, and took a few seconds to compose himself, "But out of everyone... We.. weren't expecting this from you..."

"It's just... I've never seen new recruits being... brutalized so badly..." Gorou ran his fingers through is hair, looking nervous and bothered, and Sara nodded, "This doesn't happen in my army. Sure, every army had their way of testing and fooling around with new recruits... but this is just... wrong..."

"Is this... just a Snezhnayan thing?" Barbara asked. She looked like she was going to be sick.

Trying to cheer Barbara up, and yet, having absolutely no idea what to say, Tartaglia grinned and waggled his hand, "Oh, this really isn't that bad..."

Everyone just stared at him, completely flabbergasted, like he had grown a second head.

"Just wait!" He forced a smile, "It gets worse!"

The room promptly exploded.